I suicided
 

I suicided because I absolutely did not want to be in the other sorority. The other one made me think that I was definitley getting a bid by what they said. However I got dropped today. I know that I can't get a snap bid because I suicided but what's the likelihood of me getting a bid during COB?

Actually you were eligible for a snap bid, you just were not eligible to be a quota addition.

The chapter you SIPed made quota, so unless the chapter is under total, they will not be offering COB bids.

Are you clairvoyant??? You're kind of freaking me out LOL.

Ha, clairvoyant? Based on the OP's username and the schools that have already finished recruitment, you can figure out where she most likely goes to school. I assume AZ-AlphaXi knows that all of the chapters there made quota, hence her definitive statement.

They would've had to have made quota for OP not have received a bid from them, yes?

Yes.

(with a few very very very very unlikely exceptions)

Yep .. Deductive reasoning says that the chapter had to have made quota or she would have received a bid from them. Since she didn't, that means that she was on their bid list below where they stopped when reaching quota.

I'm pretty certain every chapter there made quota. Every chapter at this university is amazing and I find it pretty sad that you felt you were "too good" to be in one of these sororities. I can also tell you that this campus does so well that they rarely have COB events in the spring. In fact, for the chapters that choose to COB, they usually only take a handful of (meaning like 5) ladies. Next time, you should give EVERY chapter a chance. I mean, that "other sorority" was willing to consider you.

The only way to know for sure if there will be any open recruitment is to contact your Greek Life office and ask. If they have a list, put your name on the list.

In the mean time, pick yourself up and dust yourself off and get involved on campus. There are other organizations and activities that you can do. Your school is a big place with a lot of wonderful people and wonderful things to do. Go find them.

We all need to remember that a new NPC rule is automatically resetting campus total to either average chapter size or median chapter size within 72 hours of bid day. On most campuses, this creates a few open spots for chapters that made quota but need to grow a bit to catch up in size (may have had a large group of seniors graduate in the spring, for example).

Local Panhel has to vote to use the rule, and not everyone has accepted it yet. I don't know the situation here.

They can choose to reset total to largest chapter size, mean chapter size or median chapter size.

Not wanting to join a specific chapter =/= thinking you're too good for said chapter.

I really wish people would quit using that as a definitive statement.

There are plenty of reasons to not feel comfortable in a group.

How many times has GC given one woman grief for "taking a spot" for a chapter she didn't think she wanted and another woman praise for "giving the group a try" even when she didn't think she fit in with the group? This poster chose to SIP and it didn't work out. Now she has to deal with the outcome.

Good Luck OP with whatever you do!

Those chapters are huge. I find it hard to believe that anyone would have a hard time fitting in to a group of 130 NMs. als may have been harsh, but she's pretty spot on.

This. Completely.

HOWEVER, OP, ya pays yer money and ya takes yer chances. My family is constantly reminding young folks we know that choices have consequences.

I guess I'm still not used to this "somewhere on the list if you're at pref" stuff and thought that she could have not been on their bid list at all.

I was under the impression that all PNMs attending pref are on the bid list somewhere. Which is why chapters have to be okay with all girls attending pref, as they could potentially walk through the door on bid day, even if she's the very last name on the B list.

Yes. If you go to pref, you should be on the bid list somewhere, unless something ungodly awful comes out about you.

She WAS on the bid list! BUT she SIP'ed. And she wasn't high enough on the bid list before her desired chapter met quota. Ergo, no bid for her. That's the risk she took.

So she was eligible for a snap bid from any other chapter, but she was SOL when it came to the chapter she SIP'ed.

Someone said that Panhellenics have to vote to adopt the automatic total adjustment rule. The Greek system at my campus has informed us that this is not the case. Automatic total adjustment is to be treated as NPC Policy and any exceptions must be approved by the NPC area adviser. This is consistent with what national officers of my org say has been communicated at other schools.

Is the automatic total adjustment new? Or is that something that has been in place?

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...d.php?t=143495

Green Book verbiage in this thread :)

That isn't an RFM concept though. As far as I know, that has always been the case.

Irishpipes, you are correct. At least since 1994 (when I pledged) being invited to pref meant you'd be on the bid list.

From page 130 of the 2014 MOI:

I usually keep my mouth shut, but I find it rather annoying that you feel the need to comment on almost every post about a woman not wanting to be a member of a certain sorority for whatever reason and attack her for thinking she was "too good" for that sorority.

Not thinking that you would fit in or not wanting to be a part of a certain chapter doesn't mean that you believe you are "too good" for that sorority. Sure, there are women who think they are "too good" for lower-tier groups but that is not always the case. For what it's worth, when I went through recruitment there were a couple of chapters that were considered very "top tier" that I personally didn't feel like I would fit in with at all - so it's not always about feeling "too good" for a chapter.

Every woman's situation is different and every woman going through recruitment needs to do what is right for her. In my opinion, it's better to suicide if you only want a bid from one chapter and would decline a bid from another chapter because then you're not taking a spot away from a girl who would love to be in the chapter you're not interested in. Quit being so harsh - you don't know anyone's particular situation and this poster didn't provide us with enough information to start drawing conclusions.

OP, actions have consequences. I'm sorry that recruitment didn't work out the way you wanted it to, and I wish you the best of luck in your college career.

Agree with Macon Magnolia. Generally speaking, I think most people who SIP aren't being open minded.... but there are exceptions! When I went through recruitment, I had a friend who SIP'd because the other chapter on her list was home to her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend, and it was an uncomfortable situation for her. I thought it was very strange that they invited my friend back, but she was a legacy and I had the sense that the chapter wasn't able to release her based on their return rates. Nonetheless, my friend SIP'd, and I thought she had a pretty good reason.

Again, this depends hugely on chapter size. At a school where the NM classes alone are 100+ women, I'd tell a PNM to suck it up.

As a parent, I also think fees would be valid consideration. If the sorority is unhoused with low fees I would say to give it a try. If out-of house fees are in the 7 to 9k range theire may be better options for those dollars.

I didn't think it had anything to do with RFM. Like I've said before, if you only had one invitational event, I think requiring a group to put every single woman on the bid list is sillypants and probably rarely followed. But that's not the kind of rush situation we're talking about here so it's a moot point. :)

On my campus, girls often suicided for religious preferences. We only attended two chapters for preference. If a Jewish girl had only SDT or AEPhi and another chapter for preference, sometimes she might choose to ISP the traditionally Jewish chapter. A girl in my dorm had a name that might be seen as a traditionally Jewish last name, she was very Catholic. At preference she had AGD and SDT, she ISPed AGD. Luckily, it worked out. So not every girl who ISPs does so for "superficial" reasons based on social standing.

That's an excellent point. Especially if "Molly Potential Member" for example strongly identifies with her religion and culture, I could certainly see a valid reason for wanting to ISP. If "Molly Potential Member" thinks as the example you gave they would fit in with the ideals with a more traditionally Jewish chapter.

Unfortunately those who ISP, it doesn't always work out, and they have to be willing to accept that when making the decision to ISP. Its all a part of life, sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.

I don't buy it. The OP's university had a quota of something like 130 new members. These are huge chapters. I am aware of what chapters struggle and what chapters don't. In chapters of 300+ women, using the excuse that you "didn't feel comfortable" is nothing more than lip-service. If you can't find someone in a chapter of 300+ women to befriend, maybe the problem isn't with those other chapters you didn't connect with. Each of these organizations have great women in them and to suicide at a major SEC school where girls can easily get cut completely, means you are willing to take a big risk. She should have really thought of the outcomes. Would you rather be a member of XYZ or not be Greek at all? We aren't talking about a school where being Greek is no big deal. We are talking about a major SEC school where Greek life is huge. She rolled the dice and she lost. I feel no sympathy.

Maybe the woman makes her choice because she doesn't want a small handful of people she clicks with.

This is her choice, and not one of us has the right to chastise her for her choice, rather only to remind her that choices have consequences. Second-guessing or putting her down is petty.

Exactly. It is her prerogative. I also have no issue if a PNM makes a choice that there are chapters that do not meet her personal criteria. Sometimes it works out; sometimes, not. So long as she owns the results, I have no quarrel with her choice.

It's the "owning the results" that sometimes sticks in my craw. By all means, suicide if you would rather swallow broken glass than pledge another sorority, but don't turn around and whine about the possible negative outcome. Don't gamble if you can't afford to lose.

I agree that complaining is not appropriate. However, there are women who would rather not be Greek than be in a chapter they believe (correctly or incorrectly) is not for them. Not pledging a group is not equivalent to swallowing broken glass -- sometimes not pledging a group is the correct choice for the PNM (and the chapter).

I employed hyperbole - sorry if it wasn't obvious.

Certainly there can be very good reasons to suicide. If that is the case, there should be no whining. A pnm made the right choice for herself.

Absolutely! And the chapter does not have someone pouting and putting a damper on festivities for those who want to be there.

You don't need to feel sympathy for her, but you don't need to be a judgmental ass towards every single girl who comes on here saying she doesn't feel comfortable in a certain chapter. You do not know her reasoning and you have no place to make judgment.

Oh, the irony in telling others not to be judgmental while at the same time being judgmental. :rolleyes: