ADHD
 

Are any of you parents of a child with ADHD or do you have ADHD? We think that this may be a strong possibility for our daughter (she appears to have more issues with attention than hyperactivity), and I'm kind of at a loss of where to start insofar as how do I talk to her about it and what kinds of things that I can do to help her manage it and to help her learn to manage it. (She's 6, so she still does need guidance.) We have done initial screenings and have set up an appointment with her pediatrician for a consultation.


I'm hoping to just get some ideas to find places with rational resources to do further research to come up with a plan of action. When you google, you find all kinds of crazy things. If you wouldn't mind PM'ing me with some websites or books that aren't nutty (I mean either too granola or too mad scientist) or sharing your experiences, I would greatly appreciate it. I have a trip planned to the library this weekend, but I was hoping to have a list of books that I could take with me.

Thanks and love to you all.

I know quite a few people diagnosed with ADHD (it is also overdiagnosed).

An older thread about medicated children.

In addition to consulting your doctor, check out the information provided by the Center for Disease Control, National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), and see whether there is a mental health association in your city. Mental health associations provide a lot of resources including support groups/meetings. Depending on the size of the city, you may have more than 3 (separate) organizations to provide mental health services.

Once you get comfortable with all of the information provided, you may want to check out the medical and social science research (books and peer-reviewed journal articles) conducted on people with ADHD. Some interesting information--none of it presented as unequivocal, 100% applicable fact--that can provide illustrations of life with ADHD.

Examples of some new books:

Thomas Brown. 2014. Smart but Stuck: Emotions in Teens and Adults with ADHD. San Francisco, CA: Jossy-Bass.
http://www.amazon.com/Smart-But-Stuc.../dp/111827928X

Stephen P. Hinshaw, Richard M. Scheffler. 2014. The ADHD explosion : myths, medication, money, and today's push for performance. New York, NY : Oxford University Press.
http://www.amazon.com/The-ADHD-Explo.../dp/0199790558

What makes you think ADHD rather than typical 6 year old "Oh, shiny!"?

I hated the meds from the beginning (I felt like a zombie), and now treat with 3-4 cups of coffee daily. Lately, I've been super-struggling with it. I'm doing everything I can to get out of the desk job environment, because I just can't do it any more.

Thank you both. I'll send you a PM, AlphaFrog.

My daughter is on ADHD medication, and the first one we tried gave her a zombie-like feel as well. She responds to her current med much better!

We medicate her only during the week/school year. On the weekends/during the summer we go the caffeine route like you mentioned above, only, since she's a kid and is picky about taste, she pops a few chocolate-covered espresso beans instead of drinking coffee. We've found it to be very helpful, but she can't have any after noon or else she's up ALL NIGHT LONG.

This is very interesting. I'm not overly interested in medicating her unnecessarily, and I have never allowed her to have caffeine beyond chocolate milk from time to time. Thanks!

Our son was diagnosed with ADHD in second grade and with Asperger's in third grade. We resisted medication for a long time, but finally went to it, and it made a big difference. Yes, some meds will make some kids feel like a zombie. Remember that different meds will affect different kids different ways. The first one we tried, Aderall, made our son depressed. Very scary. He then went to Metadate, which he has tolerated without any problem. We use it every day, including weekends and summers, because he feels and functions better with it. It not only helps him focus, but with the hyperactivity, it makes him noticeably more grounded. As he's gotten older, we've worked on helping him learn safe, non-medicinal ways to achieve the same result—exercise, diet, etc. (Some of this has taken better than others. :)) We'll use caffeine at times as well.

One thing that was very helpful for us was a doctor who really understands the meds. Because of the Asperger's, our pediatrician referred us to a pediatric neurologist. That has made a real difference in making sure the meds are not only helping, but also that they aren't keeping him from feeling his best.

Good luck! I'll try to think of some resources, but for my money, a doctor you trust is one of the best resources.

Thanks, MC.

Here's a little essay that may give you an idea of what it's like to have an ADHD brain.

I was diagnosed in grade school back when the diagnosis was fairly novel. Had to see a psychiatrist all the way up in Tulsa (grew up in Edmond, just north of OKC). Was one of the only, if not the only child in a large school district who was both in the gifted & talented program who also had an IEP.

The meds (ritalin) did help in school and did help with some of the impulse control. On the downside, I think it took its toll on me as a social person. Off the meds, I was a troublemaker, on such good terms with the Principal that we kept a running chess game going for when I was sent to the office (which was frequent). That of course, made me one of the most popular kids in school... On the meds, I ended up being pretty much a loner who wrote programs in BASIC for fun. I was one of those.

At the age of 14, entering high school, I started refusing medication and still do. While the doctors offered analogies like glasses being used to correct vision and medication being used to correct ADHD, I didn't and don't buy it. ADHD is just who I am and who I was meant to be.

So I'm a disorganized, impulsive trial lawyer which means I will always have to have a good assistant to help me keep my stuff together. I've adjusted rather than medicated. As a parent, I'm pretty likely to pass on this condition (and I probably deserve to, but my wife is innocent). I tend to favor medicating children until they are old enough to decide for themselves.

Thanks, AZTheta and Kevin!

Two of our children have ADD and 1 ADHD. I know some people say they shouldn't be divided but there is a huge difference. All, however, are on Vyvanse and it works great for them. A fourth son was diagnosed after he went to college and he only needed Vyvanse during the school year. When he worked as a camp counselor in the summer, he didn't need it. Now that he has graduated. he doesn't use it at all.

We are happy to have found a med that works and it really does for them.

Thanks so much, carnation!

My husband is ADHD and also doesn't medicate for it. He favors not medicating kids until they are old enough to choose for themselves. That's the tactic we're taking with our youngest, who has been DXd with it.

Youngest DC has such a huge, charming personality that I'd hate to squish it. I also have concerns about the long term effects of ADHD meds on the brain, whatever the industry says about its safety. That risk/benefit analysis is something every parent has to weight for themselves, though. I don't think there is a clear right answer.

BTW, there are enough gifted kids with LDs that we now have a label for them: twice exceptional (2E). You weren't the only one, just the only who was identified and getting appropriate school and treatment. Your parents were doing a good job.

Thanks for the chess story. Both of my kids spend too much time in the principal's office. The downside to having crazy, genius children is that they're crazy.

This reminds me of the back-and-forth my husband and I had about how to treat our daughter. We wanted it to be her decision (whether or not to medicate), but we also knew it was our responsibility to help her succeed.

It was obvious that she was having difficulty maintaining focus in school - well beyond the "oh, she's just a kid" type of behavior. The teachers were great about working with us, and supported us in our initial decision not to medicate (until she could decide for herself). But it began affecting not just her academic progress, but her social progress as well. It was at that point that we decided to try meds. The first one we tried (Vyvance) pretty much zapped her personality, then progressed into teenager-like moodiness. (Aack!) We're now on extended release Adderall, which is nice since she takes one in the AM and then is done for the day.

KDCat hit the nail on the head when she said there's no clear right answer. It has taken us years of working with teachers, doctors and pharmacists to figure out what's best for our daughter. (It was a pharmacist who suggested we talk with the doc about a weekend caffeine regimen - we never would have even known to ask.)

amIblue?, I think it's great that you're getting feedback from others who have dealt with this, but I'm glad you've set up an appointment. The appointment itself is a big commitment - be prepared to spend an entire day (if not more) talking with the evaluating doc. If you don't spend a significant amount of time there, I would recommend a second opinion - this type of diagnosis just can't be made in a couple hours. I hope you find the doctor that's right for you!

I really appreciate all of your stories. I can't tell you how much I do appreciate the time you spent to share.

My personal approach when faced with a problem is to collect as much info as I possibly can about whatever the issue may be and then come up with a plan of action.

I will not lie and say that the thought of giving my child medication doesn't give me serious and significant pause. I'm not against medications, but I am worried about the effects they may have both in the present and in the future. My child is bright and imaginative and generally awesome, and I don't want her to turn into a zombie. I also don't want her to struggle academically or socially if there's anything reasonable that can be done to help her.

Currently, it appears to be more of an academic struggle for her than anything; ADHD was really not on my radar when we started the whole process. I thought that it was a possibility, but not likely because her behavior really isn't a problem. Maybe once or twice a month at school she'll get in trouble for talking when she shouldn't be or not following directions. I'm sure there are perfect kids in the world, but I think her behavior is typical.

I'm starting to line my ducks up in a row to figure out what our plan will be if I'm not happy with our consultation with her pediatrician and where we'll go next. (I always like to have a plan b at a minimum if not plan c, d, and e.) I will not be OK with a short office visit and a prescription.

I've got some chocolate covered espresso beans, and I'm going to try one this weekend to see if 1. I can get her to eat it and 2. to see if I can tell any difference with her.

Again, thank you all so very much.

Absolutely agree.

I think your approach and your balancing question are spot on. Just want to throw one more thing in the mix, from our experience. As I said, we resisted medication for a while. When our son did go on it, my wife's comment was "I have my son back!" Rather than making him feel like a zombie, the meds grounded him—I don't know a better way to describe it—and we started seeing the happy (usually), imaginative kid that the hyperactivity had squelched.

Others' mileage may certainly vary, but we've found that over the years, our son has generally felt better with the meds. Doesn't mean we want him to be on them forever, or that he does. But they've been a great help in giving him space and ability to develop other coping skills and mechanisms.

So all that is to say, even after you've made a decision, don't be afraid to revisit, reassess and try something different if you don't like where you are.

I have three stories, which I'll try to make as short as possible.

1. My husband and his twin brother were DXed ADHD at around 5. My husband took meds until midway through high school, it was really messing with his weight and he was tired of taking the meds. In college his grades plummeted so much that he went back on meds for his last year to make sure that he would pass all of his classes. He has developed a lot of coping mechanisms over the years and has not been on meds since graduation--it can cause some problems every once in a while at work, but he is doing pretty well.

2. My little sister always had behavioral problems and was never able/willing to do her homework/housework/organized sports/anything that required attention. We didn't know what was going on until at 17 her pediatrician recommended her to a psychiatrist to go through ADHD screening. Turns out that they DXed her with ADHD. She tried Strattera first, but that did nothing. Then she tried Adderall XR, and it was really rough on her. Eventually, she got put on Vyvanse and is doing so well--her attitude/personality and grades have completely changed. Downside (though she doesn't see it as such) is that she went from being a size 6 to a size 0. She also moved up from 30 mg to 70 mg very quickly. ETA: I think that if she had been medicated at 6, school and life generally speaking for my little sister would have been a lot easier--but YMMV, especially since I do not believe that would have been the case for me.

3. I was never a problem child and always did well in class. I, however, also spent HOURS on my homework (everything from reading pretty slowly to spending a lot of time changing the font on a document). I love reading, and as early as the age of 5 I would have three books in front of me and read one page of each because I couldn't just read one book at a time. In college I had trouble keeping up with the reading because I had keep reading the same paragraph over and over again. Before I knew it I would have spent an hour trying to read five pages. I found out that if I played an audiobook at crazy high speed while reading in the book, it forced me to read very quickly and stay focused on the content. I procrastinated on papers, but at the undergraduate level it wasn't too big of a problem.

In graduate school, that doesn't work because I am often reading articles and books that don't have audiobooks, and it is just not okay (or healthy) to write a 30-page publishable-ish paper in the wee hours of the morning the day it is due. I was really struggling, especially because the material is interesting to me and I genuinely love what I'm doing. Additionally, research was awful because I would start reading an article and then latch onto something interesting in it and start researching that topic, leading me down a rabbit hole that just didn't allow me to get any writing done because I was spending a lot of time researching interesting, but unhelpful and irrelevant stuff. Worried that I was starting to get depressed, I called my mom and talked to her about it. She told me that after all of her reading on ADHD for my little sister, she thought it would be a good idea for me to get screened, too. After several weeks of testing, I was DXed ADHD at the age of 23. Thankfully my sister already did the medication rollercoaster, so I was immediately put on Vyvanse. It has helped me so much. It is no miracle pill, and at 5' 5" 105 lbs. I have to be very careful to make sure that I am eating during its peak effectiveness (between breakfast and dinner) when I really feel the anorectic side effects. I don't want to be on the pill forever and want to try and take a one-month break over the summer, but Vyvanse (along with developing a VERY detailed daily schedule and using the Pomodoro system) has really been a lifesaver for me. I have stayed at 30 mg for ~8 months now, and although I don't feel the initial "kick" that I felt during the first few weeks I have refused to raise my dosage based on talking with my husband and doing some research. I'm convinced that while I might not get that same feeling, the meds are working because when I make the decision to focus on something I can in a way that I was not able to before taking anything.
Downsides: anorectic effect and I have to be REALLY careful to not get pregnant while I'm taking it (which also means I'm going to have to develop some adequate coping mechanisms for when my husband and I decide to have kids).
ETA: I think if I had been medicated earlier on, my life would have been made marginally easier, but I was bright and able to develop a lot of coping mechanisms on my own until I got to graduate school. I'm not sure if in my case (as opposed to my sister's) being on medication would have been worth the downsides. Just some food for thought.

Reading material that may help you understand ADHD:

"The Mislabeled Child" by Brock Eide and Fernette Eide. (It's about learning disorders in general, but has a good section on ADHD.)
http://www.amazon.com/The-Mislabeled.../dp/1401308996

ADDitude Magazine:
http://www.additudemag.com/

ADDitude Magazine podcast:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/...668174671?mt=2

Science Daily: (They run a section just with the latest research in ADD/ADHD)
http://www.sciencedaily.com/news/min.../add_and_adhd/

I forgot the best one! This book is a picture book that has a great explanation of ADHD:

All Dogs Have ADHD:
http://www.amazon.com/Dogs-Have-ADHD.../dp/1843106515

Thanks, KDCat and txpacer!

Slight tangent, but there is a great companion book to that one: All Cats Have Asperger Syndrome. We used it as the way to tell our son about his diagnosis; he read it and kept saying "that sounds like me!" and "that sounds like me, too!" At the end, he closed the book and said, "Well, it looks like I may have Asperger's, too."

I wonder sometimes if it's one reason he loves cats.

Aw! That is super-cute!

This is an informative thread. GC is wonderful.

I wouldn't trade my brain for anyone's. Ever. Not that anyone would want mine. I love associational chaining type of thinking (as opposed to linear sequential although I can do the latter, but don't find it at all enjoyable). Flexibility and creativity abound when your thoughts roam.

Thom Hartmann used/uses "the hunter in a farmer's wold" theme. You can check out his writings; he has a web page. At the end of the day, it is what it is. I feel sorry for neurotypical people sometimes - they are so SLOW!

My twin brother and sister were diagnosed way back in the late 80s with ADHD and were medicated from the time they were in the first or second grade. From experience being the older sibling growing up in the same household (I'm six years older), discipline and structure is so important. They do so much better when they have expectations and rules to follow. My family was totally chaotic and it effected how my siblings managed. They could never really have medication holidays because of that dynamic. I always knew when someone had forgotten to give them their medicine because I'd wake up in the summer or on the weekend to them bouncing off the walls. My brother still needs medicine today but is fairly successful working for a tech company in Silicon Valley. I think he takes something non-scheduled like Stratera. My sister doesn't take anything and lives in our hometown.

I worked for several years at a residential camp, and I had quite a few of the "takes Ritalin during the school year but does not take it during the summer." That's bullshit. If your kid needs meds when he/she is your responsibility, don't dump an unmedicated kid on an unprepared, underpaid, and stretched-too-thin camp counselor.

(This is the general "you," as I don't have any reason to believe parents in this thread are sending their kids off to summer camp like this, it's just a general rant.)

That said, I have intimate knowledge of several kids medicated for ADHD who have terrible eating habits and the like. I tutored a kid who was 9 years old and refused to eat pretty much anything but Pop Tarts. Situations like this raise a serious eyebrow for me...your kid is eating processed sugar six times a day and you are surprised he has a hard time concentrating on his math homework?

That's not to say ADHD doesn't exist, or that it should never be medicated, only that I think it should be a last resort once a kid has a good eat/sleep/exercise routine. Them drugs have side effects (note also that this is my default position on virtually any medication, not specific to ADHD, or even psych meds in general).

I am surprised no one has mentioned Ned Hallowell or the books, Driven To Distraction and Delivered From Distraction. I read the second one when I was 21, recommended and lent to me by a friend with ADHD herself (a sister but moreso a close friend, since we met working as summer camp counselors together, and then I eventually transferred to her college).
That book saved my mental health... it has short, informative chapters, and it's designed for people with ADHD so you can skip around like us ADDers are prone to... but after reading it I realised this was my life written down, and I wasn't alone.
Dr. Hallowell is the preeminent expert on ADHD... he not only has it himself but also suffers from dyslexia (many ADHDers are co-morbid, and will have another disorder alongside the ADHD, or vice versa. I have dyscalculia, which is the numbers equivalent of dyslexia.) and is The Guy who knows the most... annoyingly, his center does not accept health insurance.
I also got ADDitude magazine for quite some time and it helps immeasurably. It's a fantastic resource.
I do advocate meds as long as you can find ones that work for you/your kid. It took me a very long time (mainly due to insurance) to get adderall, which changed my life. I no longer felt dumb... what used to be 3 hours of studying with a small percentile of retention, I could now do in 20 minutes with an extremely high rate of retention.
I know, this reply is all over the place... I'm not medicating for ADHD right now, bc I have much larger fish to fry medically, so it's at the bottom of my pile. If I get back in a situation that requires my attention and focus, I'll get the script again.
Here's the link for the book:
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=...fp3eaZGB-GkM2w

Welcome back, Alex Mack!

Thanks for sharing your story as well as the references, Alex Mack!

I gave you that book? I don't recall doing so, but I guess it doesn't surprise me ;)

My mom had that book. I remember doing a quiz in the beginning of it.

My Opinion: I didn't mention Ned Hallowell because I don't care for his advice (or agree with him). His experience (and advice) is not a universal gold standard, and I don't agree that he is considered "the preeminent expert." That may be your opinion, Alex Mack, but it isn't everyone's. We can agree to disagree without being disagreeable! ;) Important for people reading this thread to know that there are other opinions besides his, and other options.

The pharmacology of medication for ADD and ADHD is complex. For me, Adderall exacerbated the irritability and anxiety, and I couldn't sleep. My type of ADHD did not respond well to that medication. Very low dose of time-release methylphenidate (Concerta) is most effective for me, with few side effects. Exercise is invaluable! So is meditation. It is possible to quiet the "monkey mind". If I can do it, anyone can do it.

I suggest finding a trained psychiatrist who has an extensive background in biochemistry and is willing to work with you in managing your symptoms and maximizing your potential for success. I am able to focus without losing my personality, which was the paramount goal for me and my doctor. I like myself a lot better ON Concerta than OFF it!

Me too! I'm much more likeable when I am on Concerta.

I didn't find "Driven to Distraction" very helpful, either.

So, we got the formal diagnosis today. ADHD it is. Thanks to everyone who shared stories and information. Now I have some big decisions to make about treatment.

One of my daughters has ADHD-was diagnosed in middle school. She is now in her mid-twenties. Distractability/zoning out was/is her main issue. She felt frustrated because she knew she was smart enough to do the homework or the classwork, but she just couldn't... she actually brought it to our attention. Anyway, we went through a number of meds-some made her anxious and angry, some made her nauseous, but vyvance works very well on her. She "feels like herself" on it-not drugged/zombied/angry. It's kind of like ADHD Goldilocks- "and this one is just right!" Dosing is also really critical-too little and it isn't quite enough, too much and she was bouncing off the walls and hyper-detail oriented (She does not have hyperactivity component). We were lucky to be part of a fairly large pediatric group where one of the docs is an ADHD specialist. So one needs to be patient determining which medication works best, as there is no one size fits all med out there.

We also developed coping mechanisms like working on organization skills and making sure that she got enough exercise/flossing around time and minimized sugar/chemical food colorings. We also had to let go of some things and pick our battles-like expecting her to hang her wet towel up every time she took a shower, or making her bed every day-too many other things were more important to keep organized.

She can tell the difference when she is not on it, and it bothers her, as she prefers her brain to be more organized. She also has a very detail oriented and demanding job. My husband and I, along with her boyfriend can kind of tell when she is not on it (usually the weekends, as she doesn't care if she is a bit spacey then), but it is no biggie to us. Her essential personality is still there, regardless of being on her meds or not. Which is, in the end, what you want.

Good luck!

Oh, and your medical insurance company may try and make your pediatrician/psychiatrist use the cheapest/generic meds first, as some of the ADHD meds are expensive (like Vyvance). Your doc will have to be willing to do battle with the insurance company if he/she moves up the chain of ADHD meds.

ADHD WIFLSRN: I wanted to take a month off of Vyvanse, and weaned off of it over the course of a week and a halfish. I'm two weeks in, and it is time to get back on it. I feel so scattered. Sure, I have some creative ideas that pop up randomly, but I don't really think that I lose those when I'm on the Vyvanse. The Vyvanse makes socializing a lot easier, too. The meds are apparently more important for me than I thought.

So, I wanted to thank everyone who shared his/her story with me. We did end up making the decision to try medication for our daughter, and after a rocky start, I can't begin to tell you the improvement that we've seen. When her school work comes home, it's as if a completely different child has done it. We don't have to fight to do her 5 minutes of homework each night. She's not afraid of the work anymore.

I still have reservations in my heart about giving such a little one such strong medication, but she LOVES school now, just as I always thought she would. With a bit of enrichment, I believe she will be caught up to her peers soon.

ETA: the more research I do, the more convinced I am that I have it, too. Any parents had a similar experience?

Not me, but my husband.

And it happens a lot. A kid gets a DX and a parent realizes that they have the same thing.