Alright, it's gotta be asked...guys...how to tell if she's a stripper
 

A buddy and I are trying to solve a bet of a woman that works out at the gym who we believe is in the lap-dancing industry (I know, i know, money and strippers don't mix).

1) she has scary fire-red hair with dark blue eye-liner.
2) ability to leg press reps of 700 pounds.
3) tight (and very nice) blue spandex pants.
4) always being leered at by these two guys named scott and blaine.
5) ankle tatoo.

The quantitative analysis of this criteria could have great implications for our future sociological references on "how to tell if she's a stripper". From your experience guys are there any significant flaws in this study that need to be addressed?

damn dude, what a great title. It almost reminds me of that one facking annoying penis size thread that "had to be asked" but that's off the wall, onto the topic at hand!



Ah, how to tell if a woman is a stripper hey?
Well, you can always spot them by the way they try to walk with eight inch heals, but they look more like they are waddling.

If she has bleach blonde hair with dark black eyebrows, that's always a sure way to tell!



that's all i can think of for now.

d

If they walk by a light pole, wrap their legs around it and hang upside down, that would be a good hint.


Drop a dollar, folded in half the long way, and see if she takes her top off...

If her eye brows came from a pencil......

Those all seem like really good clues but really you'll never really KNOW unless you see her at work. Like what does a rich man really look like. Not all rich men dress up like they're loaded.
Try asking her what kinds of tricks she can do with quarters?
:confused:

you can tell by the way her nose hangs down from her eyes. Yup. Maybe not stripper, but you can tell a dancer. There was actully a couple ballerias. But still, the proportion of the nose to the rest of the face. Word.

you can realize her by the wad of dollar bills she always has with her....

or for the fact that she has no mystery to her - these girls usually are very direct

they walk by a corner and feel the need to talk to the next guy who passes by

they have a legit fear of commitment

that's all i can think of for now...

Awesome topic, Lil G!! ha ha...You guys have some really funny responses...I personally love the "if her eyebrow comes from a pencil..." ROFLOL

Ok, so I'm not a guy but who cares? I'm still giving my input. :p

Here are ways I think you can tell:

1) Keeps talking about how she's going to make her big break into stardom on the Jenny Jones show (topic: You ain't all that) or Jerry Springer (topic: My girlfriend is a Hootchie Mama)
2) She comes home with a ford Explorer. You ask "Shit, how did you make the down payment on that?" and she just smiles.
3)Her best friends are named Candy, Destiny, and Porsche
4)She wears whorish clown makeup
5)She's owns excessive amounts of pleather
6)She has piercings that you can't see....:eek:

(note: if any of you are named Candy, Destiny, or Porsche, I did not mean to offend you):)

lol

If she requests them to play Poison, Warrant, or AC/DC over the PA at the gym.....

If she has a new car, cell phone, BIG boob job, leather everything, and still lives in a trailer park....

Damn, are you guys serious ?

The serious reply is that you really don't know unless you see them work, as Kevin said.

As far as your physical clues . . . .

Blonde hair/black eyebrows, eyebrow from a pencil, explorer or other car way the hell out of a young girls price range, wears way too much make-up, has piercings that we can't see :D , and tatoos, Describes half the girls we go to college with and often the more attractive half.

The leg press is neutral and is more likely to indicate a fitness model.

The best way to find out is to walk up to her and ask her how much it costs for her to do a private party and whether she can get one of her friends, Candy, Porsche, and/or destiny to perform also . . maybe get some extra visual entertainment ;)

Or it may get you a slap in the face. lol :)

Another name I was thinking of is Celeste.

Another approach might be laughing gas. Saw that in a movie but cant remember which one. j/k :)

If her car breaks down, and she says, oh well, i'll be able to pay for it after work tomorrow. I actually heard that one.

Also, this is a long shot, but talk to her and ask what she does for a living. Chances are, if she is a stripper, she'll tell you...

lol . . . of course most of you are describing waitresses also . . . .


But thats the pretty much the same thing, just without the body requirement.

We are just having fun with it. I could seriously care less if a woman is a stripper or not. Hell, they make a sheit load of money. I know of one stripper who has paid for school completely by stripping. She has no debts, no student loans, no car payment. All she has to pay is insurance and rent, and those other bills and things.

This is just a post to get off all the stupid Kate Spade and Tiffany bs, something for the guys.

d

Or if her name is frukwanda you might have a problem

Or Double D Debi
Or Allison Alps
or Brenda Boobies

or Traci Topps

Or mandy moore...hey a guy can hope.

-She marches into the room wearing a catholic schoolgirl outfit, complete with tortoise-shell glasses, then proceeds to rip it off suddenly

-In her sleep, she yells out "Hands off me, greaseball"

-Her name, or nickname, is any of the following:
Kandi
Patricia Peaks
Aurora
Betty Blaze
Bonnie Biggs (although I know a girl with this name, who's NOT a pornstar shockingly)
Champagne etc

ahhh great idea, i'll slap in a tape of something like that...aww wow bow, tick tick tick tick bow wow...and watch her work her magic. Of course i'll just happen to be spotting my buddy at the machine next to her.

wow, that's very intimate, how did you know this...greaseball?

Call me crazy but you could always just go talk to her.

Speaking of Strippers...
 

Have any of you ever seen that HBO show that profiles a different stripper at a Philly strip club every week? I can't think of the name of it. The strippers are all gorgeous. I've never been to a strip club; is that usually the case? Or are most of them just average face-wise with good bodies?

Tracy,

I havent seen that show. It sounds interesting. I know HBO has some pretty provocative stuff at night. :) I havent been to that many gentlemens clubs but I would say that it just depends on the style and location of the place. I havent been to one in PR but I have been to 2 in DC and 2 in MD. One in DC was a real dive and girls there looked less than average and the ones at other one looked a little more upscale. I would say that generally their bodies tend to be better than their face but then beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Plus every girl is unique and different in her own special way. I saw one once in MD that looked like she had an enlargement done but then I guess you wouldnt really KNOW unless you asked. :)

Kevin

that's not what traci topps told me the other day. She gave an analogy of the guy who's obsessed with Demi Moore on Strip Tease....heheheheh j/k.

Just got back from the gym and she was there again, still wearing the same outfit as usual. Geuss whatever comes natural...