Sorority
 

Something

Is it just you that had to stop pledging or was it your whole pledge class?

At any rate, if they couldn't take the time to explain what was up to you properly, I don't think this is a group you want to be involved with or people you want as friends.

sorority
 

I was their only pledge. I was originally pledging with a girl who i was sort of friends with before the pledging process even began but after 2 days of pledging she decided to depledge. Even if she hadn't depledged after 2 days she wouldn't have been able to finish pledging either. I continued to pledge for a week and a half after that but went to a meeting about hazing which my school make us pledges go to and (that I had missed the actual one due to one of my sports team having a competition in another state) and they couldn't find the paperwork that was supposed to be given to them. So the school told them that they could not have any pledges this semester and they begged the school for two hours without any luck.

It's pretty common when someone leaves a sorority, for whatever the reason, for people to fall out of touch. Out of sight, out of mind. Rerush them in the fall or join another organization. In the meantime, why not give your sorority friends a call and see if they want to hang out? Sometimes when you think people are being weird/distant and it's actually you acting that way. Be a proactive friend and invite them to do something with you!

sorority
 

Thanks adpiucf for your advice.

Glad to hear it!

It's fine to stay friends with the first one but if you're still interested in pledging again, you should have them explain what happened and how they know it won't happen again. Otherwise, they aren't being fair to you.

Recs are going to vary from sorority to sorority and campus to campus. Most locals aren't as strict about it as many NPC groups are. You could ask your Greek Life Adviser to be sure what the situation is on your campus.

recruitment decisons
 

Hi every,
I don't really know what I want to do. I want to be in a sorority after beginning the pledging process and then having to stop due to problems in regards to the sorority. I also hung out a little with some other sororities at opens and other parties and saw how fun and how wonderful the bonds of sisterhood in my school are. So I want to pledge but I don't know if I want to go through the process of recruitment or just submit a snap bid like this past semester. My college has 11 sororities and they are basically split evenly between local and national. In my college specifically, the national sororities have a decently longer pledge program which is harsher. I began pledging a local sorority as seen from my posts above and would like to stick with local. I know many of the sororities and some of the representations and know where I would and wouldn't like to pledge so i don't know if it makes sense for me to go through recruitment(rush) or fill out a snap-bid. :confused:

I don't know about other conferences and such but if you are talking about NPC sororities they should not be "harsher" at all. Sounds like there is some hazing going on???

Snap bids are issues ONLY on the Bid Day following formal recruitment for NPC groups. And you don't fill it out anyway. And you wouldn't even know if it was a snap bid. You aren't using the correct terminology so it can be hard for us to figure out. Do you mean "accept a COB bid?" That would be the correct NPC terminology. And at this point, most schools are out for the summer or about to be. Is this even available to you at this point?

sorority
 

Well that was what they called it when speaking to me earlier in the semester before i began pledging and then had to stop because of them messing up with handing in the signed papers for pledging.

OK, you signed the papers not wrote them. There is a difference. Just trying to understand. And since it wasn't an NPC group, they may have different terms as I was referring to NPC ones.

Depends on what you expect long term. Is this just for college or a life long commitment? Would you want to have sisters if you should move across the country? Or not?

sorority
 

There are 3 sororities I am interested in at my school and those are the ones that are interested in me too. I hung out with two of them one being the one I started pledging to this past semester but had to stop due to a mess up on their part. My top two I am deciding between are both smaller sororities as well as both being local ones. I get along well with both sororities very well and in both there are girls that want me or in the one i pledged case have me as a little because they are keeping the same bigs for me if i decide to pledge them again. Both of the sororities have things to offer to me. In the one I pledged it would be easier for me to get a leadership role after joining and in the other one it would be more fun and their sisterhood seems a bit stronger. The only problem with that one is with who my big would be for reasons i will not specify. I see great possibilities with each of these sororities and am slightly confused.

Jess,
I am going to assume that your school has a formal recruitment period. If you go through this, some of the questions that you have will be answered as you meet more girls in your school's Greek system. Also, if you pledge again; you will find out more as you get to know the girls and the sorority as a whole. Don't stress the small stuff now. Please don't worry about who you want for a big before you pledge. Put first things first and plan for a good recruitment.

The sorority you depledged sounds like they can't find their bottom with both hands. I would skip them unless you are in the mood to be the organizer.

As far as girls telling you they will fight for you as a little, they really need to zip it. It's not appropriate to tell rushees that and is considered dirty rushing. The fact that it and the talk of bigs in general seems to be making you uncomfortable is a big red flag.

Know what? I remember agonizing over stuff. It's really hard to get clarity when you've got that gerbil in a freedom ball running around in your brain (or you've got "monkey mind" or the committee or whatever constantly chattering at you. Ugh.).

Here's the deal, Jess: let it be for a while. Just step back from it and do your best not to think about it at all. Things have a way of sorting themselves out. Wait until the time comes (in the fall, right?) and then you can make decisions based on how things play out at that time.

Hoping for a wonderful ending for you.

ETA: posting at about the same time as 33 and I'd take her advice.

But the point is if you were the only pledge, they should have been able to get their act together enough to not screw up their paperwork.

I'm sure they're lovely girls, but think about whether you want to spend all your college years in a state of emergency waiting for people to get their stuff together.

I agree that you should focus more on the sisterhood and where you will fit in, and not on who your Big Sister will or will not be. I think that the importance of the Big/Sister Little Sister relationship is overemphasized sometimes, especially in the minds of PNMs. My Big Sister left school the semester after I joined, but I had a lot of other friends in the chapter (not that I didn't miss her, but it didn't really impact my sorority experience that she was gone).

In addition to where you think you will fit in, think about whether there is a chapter of girls that you aspire to be like. (I'm not talking about "tent talk" or which sorority is supposedly the best, most beautiful, whatever, but where the girls exhibit qualities that you admire.) One of the things that attracted me to my own sorority was that the women in it who I knew on campus were smart, were leaders, and had their acts together. I wanted to be like that, and to be associated with people who were like that.

Good luck. Try not to stress about it too much! It sounds like it can be a confusing situation.

Good for you :) Hope you have a good time.

sorority
 

After beginning pledging last semester I wanted to try pledging to that particular sorority again since when I was forced to stop by the school due to the situation I explained in an earlier post and the girls were nice and told me to pledge this coming semester but now I am not sure. I feel like part of me still wants to pledge that sorority and the other half wants this other one that also said they wanted me.

I'll say before what I said again. If the sorority had their act together, you would not be in this position. The pledge mistress forgot to submit the papers, for crying out loud. This is like your dentist forgetting to tell you to open your mouth.

And this is for a pledge class of ONE. Can you imagine if there'd been 10 girls involved?? If you really, really, really love these girls and feel like they're your soulmates and this is meant to be, then go for it, but just be aware that from the sounds of it you'll be involved in putting out fires and fixing lots of stuff.

You are just going to have to deal with that yourself. We've given you all the advice we can. Wait till school starts and see how you feel when you are there and recruitment is going on.