Preparing for Spring Rush, and a bit nervous!
 

I go to an elite northeastern school where our rush isn't until spring semester. Coming in, most people know already know one or two girls in each sorority. I don't know any of the girls in sororities, and haven't really gotten to know any that well so far. Last year, around 400 girls rushed, and only 250 ended up joining a sorority, so I'm just getting nervous that I won't get into one, because we only have four.

So some questions:

How necessary is knowing girls coming into recruitment? Does being good friends with one give you a significant advantage, and am I at a disadvantage?

Is there anything I should be doing now to prepare?

How do sororities evaluate PNM's?

1) there is no way to answer your question about having advantages or disadvantages. Many PNMs going through don't know anyone! It may help, it may hurt.

2) there are awesome threads on preparing for recruitment in the Recruitment Forum.

3) evaluating PNMS: you are asking about membership selection and you won't get any answers, as that is considered confidential information, and may also be considered by some chapters as part of ritual.

Suggest you read, read, read in the Recruitment forum, and pay attention to the responses you'll be getting.

Good luck!

Keep in mind that some of those 250 may have decided that they just didn't want to go greek at all. It doesn't mean that all those women were dropped or didn't get bids. Some may have had their minds set on only one chapter and if they were dropped from that chapter, they dropped out of recruitment. Some may have decided it was just too time consuming to join a time intensive organization at an academically competitive school. Some may not have made good grades first term.

Focus on your grades, keep meeting new people and being involved in other things on campus, be yourself during recruitment and see what happens :)

Good luck to you!

Read the post linked in my signature. It should help.

I'd like to clarify this. MOST of the 250 women will have dropped out. In the largest most competitive rushes in the US, 250 women don't get cut completely from rush. I'd guess that cut completely number to be more like 5. And some will go through the first day and find out it is really hard stressful work and just bail, even before they get their round 2 invitations. If you decide that you want a sisterhood more than you want a particular sisterhood, chances are you will find a home. I'm hoping since you don't know a lot of sorority women you will be fully open minded. But I am concerned that you are going through rush without getting to know sorority women. Work on your social and conversational skills as much as you can in the little time you have left.

Am I hallucinating or did the OP say that 250 out of 400 recived bids? That means that (a still statistically significant, but still probably due to women dropping out on their own) number of women did not join.

To the OP- you need to look at the reasons people might quit the process. There are so many threads here, And at least a few on your school. Research!!

You have been there almost an entire semester and haven't gotten to know a single sorority woman? I would sure work on that NOW, if you can do it without seeming like a stalker!

So you have no classes with any Greek women? I'd be willing to be they know you - watch what you do.

It doesn't matter how many sororities there are. If 800 girls rushed and they all stayed in rush until the end, there would be 200 girls joining every sorority. That's how quota and total work. The reason those 150 girls didn't get a bid is not because there wasn't "room" for them. As everyone previously said, it's likely that they dropped out on their own. It's also likely that the number may have been inflated or exaggerated to make the sororities seem more "elite."

I can't believe nobody has yet said "get recommendations to each sorority." I realize that sororities at any Northeastern US college - elite or not - will find that rare, but a good rec will make you stand out.
Recommendations should come from sorority alumnae. Start NOW!!!

It's probably far more important for her to spend her time getting to know current members. If the chapters don't see recs often, it might make her name remembered slightly, but it's doubtful that it will change anyone's mind if the group really doesn't like her.

I agree with you that meeting current members is more important, but getting recs is something she can do as another step to being remembered.

I will go out on a limb and say if she gets PERSONAL recs (i.e. from a relative or good friend who is a member) it may help, but an info-only rec if her campus doesn't do recs much at all? It will just look like she thinks she has an "in" and will probably cause comments like "why is some old biddy from ChaCha U telling us to pledge this girl she doesn't even know? That's weird. Drop her now, please."

And if she has to break her back getting in touch with sorority alumnae she doesn't know from Eve - she is wasting time she could be spending getting to know the sisters who will, um, actually be in the chapter with her.

I know this is the exact opposite of many schools but if her school really is "elite" the students are probably not of a mindset to listen to what anyone from other schools tells them, in any arena, sorority rush included.

Thanks for all the advice! I've gone to some meet-and-greets and talked to some girls in one of the two sororities I really like. I'm definitely going in with an open mind, but I know its going to be competitive this year.

One situation I'm dealing with though, I'm not sure how to handle. A girl in a sorority I really can't see myself in is heavily recruiting me...she asked me to meet up and she would tell me about recruitment, and what to do to get a bid. I feel a bit weird, number one because I don't know if they're allowed to do that, and number two, how to handle the situation, seeing that I really couldn't see myself in the sorority.

Yes, she can probably do that. And yes, you should meet her. It would be very impolite not to and it would get around. Go, smile, be a lady and be gracious. Thank her for her insights and tell her you will take them to heart.

Also, you don't necessarily know yet that you wouldn't fit in her sorority. Keep an open mind until you actually go through recruitment. A lot can change between now and then, so don't burn any bridges before you even get started.

While I agree she should meet with the girl for lunch or whatever, if the girl starts saying things along the lines of "Now, be sure to talk to Nancy, she's the best liked girl in the sorority and if you get on her good side you're in" - that's crossing the line of how deferred rush is supposed to work and is dirty rush no matter how you slice it. That's how I took the "she would tell me about recruitment, and what to do to get a bid" part of the post. That would make anyone uncomfortable even if it was a sorority they really thought they liked.

No matter how laid back the rush, bid promising is still a no-no. All I can say is if the girl really does say things like that to you (I'm hoping you just misinterpreted why she wants to meet with you, and that the two of you can just have a nice companionable lunch without any lines being crossed) nod your head and say "yes, OK, thanks" and then list them last when you actually go through rush.

I don't know that you should list them last because one girl crosses the line but I would certainly have my radar tuned more finely while at their events.

It depends on the size of the chapters. I guess I got the impression from the OP's posts that they are small enough for the majority of members to know a fellow member is doing this, and by not censuring her, it means they condone it. Bid promising is a very sore spot with me.