Released from Rush
 

I was released from rush at utk which i know is a competitive school but I do not understand why. I had full parties in every round up to pref night when my gamma chi told me I had been released. All my top chapters seemed interested, I was nice and outgoing to every chapter I went to, had a good High School GPA, very involved in High School, and had recs. I had good outfits for every day and was told many times i looked very put together. I did not party during the week or do anything to get me blacklisted. My gammachi said she didnt understand why it happened either. I could rush as a sophomore but, I know my chances would be not as great as rushing as a sophomore and dont know if it would be worth going through this again. I am extremely disappointed and put so much time and spent a ton of money on outfits. I just wish I had an explanation as to why i was "released"

I'm really sorry this happened to you. Unfortunately, we're not going to be able to give you a reason as to why you were released, for two reasons:

1. We're not there or members of the chapters that released you.
2. Member selection is private, so even if we were members of the chapters that released you, members won't be able to tell you either.

Good luck in school.

Just a little extra advice:

Don't ask members at your school why you were released. Either they'll say the same as here or get really awkward about it and make something up.

Follow IrishLake's advice below about keeping in touch with the greek life office and look for opportunities for COB. And keep your grades up in the meantime.

Well you know we can't tell you why, because we don't know. I'm very sorry this happened to you. Keep in touch with the Greek life office if that's feasible, and put your name out there for COB.

Um, I don't think UT recruitment is to pref night yet - aren't they just now on skit day? My pnm has been to open house and philanthropy - I believe today is the day they go from 10 to 8 (?).

I believe she's referring to University of Tennessee - Knoxville - bid day is today.

utgirl94, keep your chin up. Get and stay involved, make more friends and then decide if sophomore recruitment is for you. And as mentioned above, COB may be an option, you won't know unless you let them know you are interested.

I'm so sorry this happened to you. Sophomores do get bids at Tennessee. We can't tell you why you were released, but sign up for COB and spring informal. Be friendly to everyone, watch your reputation, and join other orgs on campus.

Go Vols!

Whoops - my Texas orientation is showing. So sorry, utgirl94.

LOL I was like "Good lord here comes SWTXBelle again, thinking the world revolves around Texas."

So sorry this happened to you. Keep your spirits up, get involved on campus, smile and make friends. Let the Greek life office know you are interested, and know that you can have a wonderful year. I know that is little comfort now, but truly, we are always sorry to hear about difficult recruitments. Hugs.

Upperclass quota at UTK is 9 this year, so it is possible to have a successful outcome as a sophomore.

And utgirl94, you were not "blacklisted." You had full party schedules going into pref. All of the chapters had to keep releasing PNMs each round.

I hope that you made lots of new friends this week. UTK is a beautiful campus!

Study hard, get involved, and keep your options open. Good luck to you!

How do I sign up for COB? and What may be some of the reasons I was released??

Go to the Greek life office and ask about COB.

Unless we were there with the chapters, WE DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WERE RELEASED. WE DON'T KNOW YOU OR THE WOMEN IN THE CHAPTERS.

I don't mean to shout, but people always ask us this and the fact is to even give a "maybe it's because of XYZ" might be 1) so far off the actual reason as to be ridiculous 2) the PNM might misinterpret it as "this IS why I was released" and go overboard trying to change that thing, when it had nothing to do with anything to begin with.

Im not asking for a specific example because I wasnt just dropped from one chapter but 6, after skit round and dont understand how that happens after having full parties.

We don't either.

Chapters have to release a certain percentage of women after every party - this is based on figures from past years as to how many women wanted to return there, where they were ranked etc. Sororities used to be allowed to invite back WAY more women than they could ever pledge, with the result being LOTS of women going all the way through pref and not getting a bid.

It may not be a question of they wanted to get rid of you, rather that they wanted to keep someone else.

I told you this already.

Well I was at one chapter and every round, I was approaced by the president, vp., vp of recruitment, etc... and on skit round they kept saying how they want me to feel comfortable there and asking me if i did and saying how everyone loves me and that they could see me in there chapter. Which is why I was so taken back when I was told that.

I hate to be cynical, but they probably told lots of people that.

Who knows.. you may have given off an air of disinterest to each of the chapters. It's unusual for this to happen, but it does occur. Unfortunately, you didn't make enough of an impression to make that final cut. Recruitment is so hard at these massive SEC schools. Don't take it too personally, because these chapters make these decisions with so little information. You've seen that through the past few days. Contact the Greek Life office to let them know you are interested in COB. There may not be any opportunities, but you never know. This year, get to know as many sorority women as possible, and try your hardest not to be bitter about this process. We know it sucks. Not everyone shines in these parties.

I'm sorry this happened to you. I can imagine it was a shock to be completely dropped.

Can you define good high school GPA more specifically?

And now we get to the point where posters start feeling awkward and feel the need to make things up.

I had a 3.96

I am not trying to make this awkward. I do not know much about the selection process and am just wondering.

utgirl, you need to forget about recruitment. It's over. What's done is done. With your GPA and involvement in extra-curriculars, you sound like you would be a good sister (on paper). However, it didn't work out this time around. You can't change the past - all you can do is move forward.

Contact the Greek Life office, find out about COB opportunities, and if that doesn't work out, go through recruitment next year.

In the meantime, study, meet new friends (maybe some sorority sisters?), and get involved in other activities.

And whatever you do, don't dwell on the reasons why you MIGHT have been cut. You'll drive yourself crazy.

We can't share much about the selection process besides what you already know, because each organization does it differently, and all of how they do it is private.

I REALIZE THAT. I AM NOT ASKING FOR THE REASON WHY, I DIDNT REALIZE IF YOU HAD ALL FULL PARTIES THAT COULD HAPPEN AND WOULD APPRECIATE IF YOU WERENT SO HARSH.

QFP. Even after the edit, capslock is considered yelling.

Something for PNMs/aspirants to remember is that sorority and fraternity members may be (what some consider unnecessarily) harsh sometimes but we are where you are aspiring to be. Do not try to come at harsh members the way they come at you. There is a power and knowledge differential. If you truly have membership aspirations, you ultimately need the GLOs and their members (even the harsh ones) more than the GLOs and their members need every single PNM/aspirant. Many of us had to deal with harshness from some GLO members (and members of any company or organization we want to be affiliated with) but we somehow got/get over it to accomplish what we want to accomplish.

Good luck to you!

/lane swerve general lesson for life

LOL

This is what I get for being kind. :(

Because each chapter functions independently and statistically it CAN happen. Why? We don't know. 6 individual chapters can make the decision to drop you just like 3,4 or 5 could. You were just unlucky.

Okay people, let's back off. utgirl94, you've said your part and we recognize how devastating it is.

Really?

The discussion will die on its own. I think utgirl94 will grasp what they are saying.

utgirl,

I hope this all works out for the greater good for you -- I know of several great girls who had a difficult experience their freshman year, but returned to rush -- stronger than ever -- as sophmores.

I hope that you will throw your energies into involvement on campus. One way or another, this will help you meet people, make friends, and network. Should you decide to rush later, you will not only have great activities to list, you will know existing members in the chapters.

(hugs) The only way to guarantee that you will never be Greek (or anything else) is not to try. Try out for other campus positions/organizations/honor societies as well -- even those you don't make provide great interview experience, which will come in handy even beyond your college years.

Best of luck to you.

When I asked for an explanation I wasnt asking for one reason why. I was wondering if it was possible for them to all cut me which I now see it was.

utgirl,

it has to do with mathematical formulas. You didn't meet the invitation "cutoff" point for any of the chapters, based on mathematics (RFM). The Why is something we cannot answer.

Yes, it hurts. It will only continue to hurt if you dwell on it and wallow in it. I might refer you to The Work by Byron Katie (google it - she has YouTube videos) as a means of handling this situation you find yourself in.

FWIW one of my favorite Thetas is a woman that was released from recruitment her freshman year. She focused on her academics and on behaving herself and on involving herself in some campus activities. And she picked herself up, dusted herself off, and went through recruitment the following year. We talked about it afterwards, when she opened up about her freshman experience, and she shared how hurt she was as a freshman, but that she was grateful that she'd had her freshman year to grow up and adjust to college.

AzTheta, I have the exact same experience! The woman I am thinking of went on to be our Theta Chapter President, a traveling consultant for two cycles, and has served as Advisory Board Chairwoman recently. She absolutely rocks and I feel privileged to know her. Life gave her lemons, but she CHOSE to make lemonade with them.

Make this experience a positive one and you will set yourself up to succeed in spite of what life chooses to throw at you.

Sorry this happened to you. Good read for you:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ad.php?t=89902

Best of luck in the future.

Contact the office of Greek Life immediately to register your interest for COB and informal recruitment events. Get involved on campus-- great way to move past the disappointment, stay busy and make new friends. You will also meet sorority women this way! Make academics a priority and don't embarrass yourself socially. Good luck!

Utgirl, I am so sorry that things did not work out for you this time. There are usually several chapters that participate in a smaller, more relaxed recruitment early in the spring semester. Check in with the Panhellenic office to find out when it will be held and how to sign up for that.
If you don't want to go that route, UT does have a separate quota for upperclassmen and you can wait until next year to go through formal recruitment again. This seems to work best for girls who have several close friends in the same chapter.
Either way, you have options. Right now, find some campus organizations you are interested in, get involved, and make the best grades you can make this semester.