Auburn Recruitment Story
 

I have been lurking here for a few months and thought I'd join to post my daughter's recruitment story. It will be a Reader's Digest Condensed Version as she is not incredibly forthcoming with minor details and I was horrible about writing down all she did tell me. However, there are valuable lessons in this story that might be of help to others down the road.

First a little background: No one in our family has ever "gone Greek". Very few have ever even gone to college. She is out of state and only knows one student at Auburn. That young lady is in a sorority at Auburn but was three years ahead of her in school so they don't really know each other. She has close to a 4.0 unweighted GPA, was very active in school, community and church organizations, holding several leadership positions. She has never aspired to be a cheerleader, homecoming queen or pageant participant (not that there's anything wrong with that). It never even occurred to her to participate in recruitment until she went to Camp War Eagle early in the summer. Even then, she was more interested in going to meet people than anything else.

Due to very little time and no experience, I spent the summer on Greek Chat. There I learned that we were woefully unprepared as neither of us had even heard of Lilly Pulitzer.:eek: Still, we ventured on. She was able to secure at least one rec to every sorority through friends, friends of friends and even friends of friends of friends. For a few, we relied on friends of acquaintances. I was not above asking total strangers for advice and suggestions for getting recs. At Walmart, I once saw a license plate of a particular sorority we needed and seriously considered having the owner of the car paged. We shopped for clothes that would work for recruitment and be of use later.

We made the long drive to Auburn and got her moved in and ready. I was a nervous wreck about her recruitment. She was as cool as a cucumber. Her philosophy in recruitment and in pretty much all things is that it works out the way it is supposed to work out and there is no point in worrying. I can assure you this is not a trait she got from me.

What a treat to find an Auburn story!
Carry on!

Yes. I will be following this post and checking back as much as I can. I can't wait to hear how it went. War Eagle!

I tried going to sleep but no luck so I will continue. My daughter went to convocation and heard some amazing advice that stuck with her throughout. A speaker said everything about keeping an open mind, etc. They ended with "Every sorority at Auburn is wonderful. There are 120 young ladies in every sorority. If you honestly think that you cannot make a connection with and become friends with any of the members, the problem is not with the 120 women already in the sorority." I loved that and so did she.

Since this is a condensed story, I will not be describing all 17 chapters. Instead I will focus on the four that became the major players towards the end. On the first day, she attended 12 parties. Although she enjoyed all parties, there were three that stood out at the end of the day, for both great and not so great reasons.

War: This was her favorite of the day. Everyone was super nice and she had great conversations. Life was perfect. I am pretty sure unicorns were pooping rainbows at this party.

Eagle: This one was what she described as the most awkward. It was party number 11 of the day and she felt like she was at an interview instead of participating in a conversation. She would answer the question and then ask the active a question. The active would ignore what she said and move on to the next questions. Still she chalked it up to the active being nervous and possibly new at recruitment. A new active came and it got better. She described them as nice enough.

Aubie: She said these girls were very nice. She met lots of people. Everyone kept mispronouncing her name, even after she corrected them so she started to get annoyed. Still, they were nice enough and seemed interested in her.

On her second day, she visited the remaining sororities.

Tiger: This was her favorite of the day. Again, she met several people. An officer came to meet her. She loved them. The rainbow pooping unicorns were also at this party.

At the end of Day 2, she had to list five alternates. Because there was something she liked about each of the sororities, she struggled with ranking alternates. After a while, she listed the five alternates, including Eagle and Aubie. It seems like silly reasons to list them but she said she was not too worried about it. She said she would not mind going back to any of the 17 and, if she went back to her alternates, it was because she was meant to. That is her calm personality. I, on the other hand, was starting to binge on Diet Cokes and Oreos.

Man I guess the unicorns have been eating a lot of fiber! :D

I like this one already.

On the first day of Philanthropy parties, I was up before 6 am. That is very strange because I am so not a morning person. At the appointed time, I am holding my breath and hoping her manages to keep War and Tiger. My text alert goes off and I run frantically to my phone to see a text that there is a computer malfunction. Schedules are delayed at least an hour.

During the wait, I remind her that very few people have full schedules and she will probably be cut from some of her favorite groups. I am praying she has at least a few parties to attend and am hoping that, since her favorites are not typical favorites, she will have an easier time of it. She said that she is fine with that and does not want to be in a group that does not want her.

Finally, an hour after she was supposed to get her schedule, she sends me another text. She has 11 parties, including War, Eagle, Aubie and Tiger. I ask her if she is upset that she does not have 12. She quickly texts that only one person in her PiChi group has 12, many have much less and that she is just fine.

War- She still loved this group but it was not quite as fabulously wonderful as she expected them to be.

Tiger - The unicorns made another appearance today. She was just gushing about this group. My daughter told the active about a mission she helped start at church and at least nine people came over to hear about it. She loved them, they seemed to love her. It could not get better.

Day 2 of Philanthropy

Eagle - This party went much better than the expected. The text I got was "I actually enjoyed Eagle this time."

Aubie - Today, everyone suddenly knew how to say her name. They seemed passionate about their philanthropy. She described them as a hodgepodge of different kinds of people that seemed to get a long well. This group was growing on her.

After the last party, she had to list four alternates. War and Tiger were her absolute faves and she really wanted to go back to Aubie and learn more about them. She listed Eagle as her second alternate. Again, there were none that she disliked and made it clear she would be honored if any of them wanted her to attend their skit day parties.

The next morning, she says she has her Skit Day schedule and has a break first but has five parties afterwards. She still has War and Tiger as well as Aubie and Eagle. I was so thrilled she was going back to War and Tiger. I had already been on websites looking at War and Tiger items to send her on bid day. We talked about how she would possibly choose between War and Tiger if she were invited to both for Prefs. She gave me the pros and cons of each sorority and we go through every party. It was a virtual tie. What came out of my mouth next was one of my worst moments and one of my daughter's finest. After she said she had no idea how to decide, I said, "Which one is more popular?" Like I said, one of my worst moments.

She came back with, "I am NOT going to choose a sorority based on how popular they are. Do you really think I would care about the opinion of anyone who likes me or dislikes me just because of the letters I wear?"


Anyway, here is how the parties went...

War: The text I received said: I LOVE WAR. Even their ice is perfect. I can definitely see myself as a part of that group.

Tiger: I loved this party. They are so nice. The girl I has from Philanthropy came over and hugged me. I can see myself here. I still have no idea how to choose.

Aubie: I actually really enjoyed today. The girls are so relaxed. There are all kinds of girls here but they seem to have a strong sisterhood. (She also said more stuff but I was not paying any attention because the battle over War and Tiger had my attention)

Unnamed sorority - I am trying really hard to like them but they are not making it easy. Others seem to like them but I just don't. I am not sure I would accept a bid from them and do not want to take a spot from someone who really loves them. (This was where I started to panic.)

Eagle: The girls are super nice. They showed me the bid day bag we get. It has some high end items. I am not sure we can afford to keep up in this one. (We are not old money. We are not even new money. We are barely have enough money)

She listed Eagle as her first alternate and the unnamed one as her second. I wanted to spend an hour on the phone dissecting every conversation she had but she told me I "need to take a chill pill. It will work out the way it is supposed to work out."

Literally laughed out loud at this. :D

I'm enjoying your story. My initial guess was that she ends up at Eagle. :)

"even their ice is perfect". LOL!

Love this story too...

The next morning she texts me a picture of her schedule. She has War, Aubie and Eagle. She was cut by Tiger. I am torn between upset for her and angry. How could Tiger have cut my daughter. Don't they know what they are missing out on? I want to drive down there just to give her a hug. Instead I send a text saying "It's okay. You like all three of those. It will be fine." I think I was trying to convince myself more than her. I asked her if it was okay. In her usual laid back fashion, she replied, "I'm a little relieved. I was worried about choosing between War and Tiger. Now I don't have to."

She has been a rock throughout all of this and never let any cut get to her. I don't know why I thought she would get upset now. She already decided how to rank them. It would be War, then Aubie, then Eagle. She said she would love to be a member of any of the three so I went ahead and placed my bid day order. It did not matter which sorority I ordered from because they said they would fill from the bid list. I ordered War stuff. I was so excited. A girl she had become good friends with was only Preffing War so I just knew they would soon be sisters. It was turning out perfectly...until she went to the parties.

Enjoying this story very much. Your daughter sounds great.

And just want to echo what many others have said -- all the sororities at Auburn are fantastic.

I live a long way from Alabama so was only able to visit my daughter twice last year, but both times was just amazed at how sweet, pretty, and kind girls from all the sororities were.

One of my visits was for Greek Sing (my daughter was on her sorority's team) so I got to see all of the groups in action. They are all amazing.

Yay! An Auburn story!

It sounds like your daughter has a great attitude about recruitment. Can't wait to hear how it turned out for her! :)

Pref day: She knew she was incredibly blessed to be attending three parties, especially three that she would love to join. As an OOS girl with no connections, she knew she was in the best possible position. Here is what happened.

Party 1 - Aubie: "I really, really, really liked Aubie. I'm so torn. This group is amazing."

Party 2 - War: This has been a favorite from day 1. Her friend would be in this one. I just knew it would be perfect for her. After this party, I got a text that simply said "I don't know what to do." I told her to call if she could. When I answered the phone, I could hear her voice crack. My calm, laid back daughter was in tears. She had loved War all along but described Prefs as "just okay". Aubie had been slowly sneaking it's way up the list and suddenly changed everything.

We only had 15 minutes to talk before she went to Eagle. I tried to use facts. I read back what she had told me about each group. I reminded her War was one of her favorites all along. I told her that her friend will be in War. They could be sisters. I even tried telling her that she might get to Eagle and love it so much that neither War or Aubie would matter any more. At the end I told her to weigh all of the facts and then follow her heart.

Party 3 - Eagle She liked these girls. They just seemed to like things kind of fancy and frilly. My daughter is a no frills type of girl and I think it intimidated her.

After it was all over, she waited quite a while to rank them. By the time she called, I was ready for a Valium. I just knew she was meant to be a War and wanted to make sure she did not mess that up. When I asked her how she ranked them, she said it does not matter how she ranked them because she will end up where she is meant to end up. I was shamelessly plugging for War.

Later that night, I looked at the spreadsheet of bid data posted and got concerned. The main thing she wanted in a sorority was a group from all over the country. The girls War took last year were predominantly from the South. There were very few non-Southerners. I was not sure how she would fit in.

Loving this story and your sense of humor, especially the line about money. Can't wait to hear the ending!

The next morning, I had to go back to work and could not have my cell phone on me. I had it in my desk and kept checking it discretely every minute or two. Finally, at 10:34, I got a one word and one emoticon text message.

It said

Aubie :)

Otherwise known as











Kappa Alpha Theta


This is the story of how my daughter learned to follow her heart instead of listen to her mother and how a number 14 can become a number 1 when you remember to treat each day as a new day and keep your options open. She could not possibly be more happy with her bid and I am so proud of how she handled recruitment. My wise daughter never wrote a single group off and found her perfect home in the end. It is everything she wanted in a group and I am glad she trusted the process. I am also glad they saw her as a perfect fit even before she saw them the same way.

Theta is very lucky to have her!!! Congratulations to you, your daughter, and Kappa Alpha Theta!!!

Love a happy ending rush story!

Fabulous story and fabulous ending. You raised an independent, self-assured young woman who followed her heart!

Welcome! Yay!

Congrats!!! My daughters and I are all Bama grads but know some AU Thetas....awesome girls!

Wonderful recruitment story. Congratulations to your daughter who followed her heart.

Great story! My daughter is a Theta at Auburn and she says it is a wonderful group of girls!

Congrats to your daughter! Sounds like Theta has a wonderful new member!

Congratulations! Great story. I hope she loves being a Theta!

Your daughter is super mature and I love that she was so level-headed about the whole process. Congrats to her and Theta!

ANOTHER Theta ending? Awesome!!! Congratulations to your daughter! Thanks for sharing her story with us.

Welcome!

That's what I'm screamin'!

Congratulations on having such an awesome daughter, AuburnTiger! I'm so happy for your daughter and for Theta!

(Now, I'm dying to know who War is.... ;-) )

YEAH!!! So happy to hear about a Theta ending!!! Tell your daughter to come on over to the Theta list and say hello when she has a minute to come down out of the clouds :)

I'm curious about Eagle ;)

I am truly happy for you and your sweet daughter! Theta is a great organization and I believe that her experience will be a wonderful one.

Our recruitment story was not as happy. My daughter is an out of state freshman, captain of her high school dance team, on student counsel, has a great grade point average and she is now a member of one of the best choirs on Auburn's campus. During the week she was impressed at how sweet all the girls were to her and was so excited that she might have friends so early in college. She had over 30 recommendations (many from Auburn alumni) and was completely open to any house.

We were shocked when she was dropped from recruitment.

She has not stopped crying and just wants to come home or look for a school where she does not feel rejected. She has found a church that I hope will help her through this difficult time, but of course, she can't talk about her experience because she feels so humiliated. I myself have withdrawn from my friends and the many people that wrote recommendations for her as I just don't know what to say.

I would like to encourage you Moms that are so fortunate to have a daughter in the Greek community at Auburn to be grateful and joyful that you are not trying to help your daughter through this heartbreaking experience that has overshadowed the beginning of college.

I wish you many blessings over the next 4 years.

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((AUCUMom&Daughter)))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))

AUCUMOM -- I'm so sorry and just hate to hear about this happening. These women are so young, away from home for the first time and THIS happens to them right off the bat. :( Every year in the SEC, we hear of really stellar girls either getting dropped or severely cut and there just seems to be no rhyme or reason for it.

Your daughter won't always feels as sad as she does right now, and neither will you. I know it's very hard right now, though, and I am very, very sorry.

I am so sorry this happened to her. If she hasn't stopped crying and it is affecting everything she is doing still maybe she ought to look into seeing a counselor who will help her feel better and adjust?

Has she registered for COB? I have heard that one group has started COB. It may just be rumor but the Panhellenic people should be able to tell her for sure.

My daughter is truly blessed to have received invites to three pref parties and to have received a bid to a sorority she loves. There are so many great activities at Auburn. Please encourage your daughter to get involved on campus. Also, please do not withdraw from your friends. What happened during recruitment is nothing to be ashamed of. Hiding from the world will make her feel like she let you down.

Indeed COB is occuring on campus right now. The reason I know this is because my daughter was unhappy where she pledged, and was trying to figure out if she could take a COB, which she could not. There are several chapters that are openly recruiting now, so she may be able to join one still. If she is a freshman, living on campus, she has to know or have met other girls who pledged, and would be happy to pass her name along to their chapter for consideration of a COB. If you don't want to mention it to her, since she is kinda fragile right now, I would make a call to the panhellenic or greek office myself and ask some general questions about it.

I understand your frustration. Even though our experience was different, it was devastating to my daughter to receive her third choice. I know that sounds bratty, but it is what it is. She was in tears for at least 2 weeks, and there was nothing I could do to fix it, nothing. I still hear some complaining and whining, but I just had to tell her to suck it up, and either accept it or not, preferrably to accept it!

My heart breaks for you and your daughter, and as an Auburn Alum and mom, I hate for her to want to leave our family. There are so many other organizations she can be involved in, if she can just get through this first semester. Please keep us updated, and I am sending lots of HUGS!!!!!