Reasons to rush?
 

I would really like to rush this fall during recruitment, however, when I told my parents they weren't exactly the happiest or into it. In fact, my Dad told me no flat out. I still would really like to, and I know that if I have really good arguments/reasons why they would consider it and might even change their minds. So I was wondering if you guys could help me come up with some good things about sororities/greek life to help me convince them!

You can meet some great people in your chapter and join a network that includes many others.

Greeks typically have higher GPAs than non Greeks.

I was not in a sorority in college because I bought into the stereotypes I has heard. Now my daughter is going to participate in sorority recruitment at Auburn. Because of that, I have had the opportunity to talk to many women who pledged various sororities. I have been so impressed with these women. All of them, whether church members, my daughter's teachers or perfect strangers on Greek Chat, have been gracious in answering my questions, encouraging to my daughter and willing to offer advice. I was expecting the stereotype of catty women judging others. Instead I have found women that exude class and sisterhood, not just for their sorority but for Greek life in general. Not only am I so happy that my daughter is going to have the opportunity to join this sisterhood, I am regretful that I did not experience it myself.

Is your dad in Masons, Jaycees, or similar organizations?

Let him know that you will derive similar benefits from being in a Greek organization.

You'll get a Panhellenic t-shirt just for participating (at most schools, anyway). :p

Opportunities for leadership AND teamwork and all that comes with those positions -- managing, coordinating, communicating, problem solving, interacting, planning, compromising, follow-through, time management, balancing life. All those skills are very important to take into the workforce with you. Over 80 percent of the C.E.O.'s in this country have Greek affiliations.

Greek life offers so many incentives for academic excellence, including scholarships from nationals as well as rewards within your chapter. Many Greek organizations have mandatory study hours, tutoring and other means of support. Falling behind carries penalties like social probation, losing your voting privileges and not being allowed to run for any chapter offices until your grades are back up to par.

Service work -- all Greek orgs have local and national philanthropies that are very important to them. They give time and talent to raise money for these groups and also provide hands-on assistance. They play a part in making a positive difference in the lives of others, whether its hosting a campus-wide fundraiser for a national charity, volunteering at a local youth shelter, etc., etc., etc. The list of social service and community service projects that Greeks participate in is very long indeed. They not only raise money for their own service projects, they support other Greek organizations in raising money for their philanthrophies. Again, they make a positive difference.

And it's true -- you do get a t-shirt for participating. And after you pledge, you'll get all kinds of t-shirts over the next four years! :)

This link may help!
http://www.sororityparents.com/

Not about the OP's question/

Such a site is very fitting for NPC sororities which is why it is run by NPC women (the "about us" section makes it clear what perspective it is). I want people to be clear that in certain parts the site (and thesororitylife website) presents itself as a general sorority site however that is not the case. For starters, many non-NPC sororities/councils/conferences are not invested in nonmember, aspirant, or parent opinions to the point where they would create such a website or refer someone to such a website.

I say this because things like having a photo of a Black mother and her Black daughter beside the caption "A Shared Bond: Our family has had three generations of women in sororities and we wouldn't trade the experience for anything" can be quite misleading if people are expecting to see a non-NPC perspective (rather than an NPC perspective that is sometimes being misrepresented as a "general approach to sorority life") on that site. Instead, that third generation of Black women who may have joined an NPC sorority are the focus (based on the NPC perspective presented) rather than the previous two generations who most likely joined NPHC sororities.

It actually says "three generations in the same sorority", which means that either they all popped out kids at 14 and then went off to college anyway, or it is a stock photo FAIL.

Is that a website? If not, it should be.

Totally been there!
 

This might help!
http://www.whygogreek.com/stats.html

Some of the new members in the chapter I help advise have shared that their parents have similar feelings. Usually this comes up early on when the financial contracts are discussed, and the new member explains that she is paying for everything herself, since her parents are not supportive of her decision to join. As the faculty advisor and new member education advisor, I have offered to talk to parents myself.

I have written a number of letters of recommendation for scholarships, study abroad programs, etc. for the undergraduate women I advise. They have asked me for help with problems they are having with courses, study skills, etc. They call me by my first name, and I am a extra adult resource for them on campus - someone who is bound to the same sisterhood.

Greekdee has listed many of the aspects of membership that address your parents' concerns. I second everything she shared. I can't stand the "Girls Gone Wild" stereotype, which is probably what your parents are worried about (aside from expenses and a distraction from academics, this is the other concern that parents typically have). Sororities set high expectations for membership and conduct, and your parents would be hard-pressed to find a living arrangement and/or on-campus group who would keep a closer eye on you and your behavior. Sororities are also keenly aware of the issues that collegiate women face, and provide educational programming on safety and wellness.

When it came time to help my daughter find recommendations for this coming year, we asked three of my fellow professors, a non-profit director, a retired librarian, and my freshman year roommate. All of these women are successful, highly-regarded professionals. My sister is a member of yet another NPC group, and she is a pediatrician.

I sincerely hope that you are successful in convincing your parents to be supportive! Sometimes it's hard for us to let our 18-year-olds make their own decisions, so be respectful of this transition...it's a hard adjustment for your parents, who are worried about you and want what is best for you as you begin college.

Thanks for so many responses, I wasn't expecting that! :) I really hope that I can change their mind, to me, Greek Life seems like it be really rewarding. Plus, at my school it'll be a lot cheaper than living in an apartment or dorm!
What do you think would be the most convincing way to talk to them? I was thinking a sit down talk with a slideshow?

Just show them this thread! We are all adult professional women who have benefited from our sorority memberships. I am 66 years old, spent many years in construction sales and am now the Registrar at an independent school.

While I was International Director of Housing for my GLO, we instituted a policy requiring all our housing to have fire sprinklers in order to help keep our women safe. We worked with sprinkler professionals, banks and house corporations to make this possible all over the US. Those are the kinds of things we do to keep our women safe. I think your parents would want you to be a part of this type of organization.

Thanks for all the help you guys! I'll keep you posted! Wish me luck!

I love the slideshow idea! One of my friends and her husband agreed to let their daughter participate in something (sorry, I am drawing a complete blank on what it was) after she put together a "presentation". They had to admit her points were strong, plus they were impressed with her creativity! It also showed them how important it was to her.

I think you also need to find out exactly what the objections are. Is it financial? If so, then you need to figure out how you're going to pay for those dues so you can tell them that. Is it having a skewed idea of what happens in sororities because of movies/negative media? Then counteract those things. Are they worried that you need to make sure you can handle the academic load before committing yourself? If so, then you need to have points that speak to that. Was there a bad experience when he was in college that gave him a negative view? I was lucky because my mom was totally against me joining a sorority but my dad felt that being in a fraternity was the best thing he did in college. When they met in college, apparently my mom was harassed by sorority women because she was dating a fraternity man and wasn't in a sorority. That left a bad taste in her mouth. My dad was so supportive though that he overruled her objections.

After meeting my sisters at a Mother-Daughter Tea, my mom changed her tune and the summer before she died (24 years after my Initiation), she told me "You doing that sorority thing was a really good thing for you to do. I'm really impressed with your sorority."

Thanks for sharing this. What a wonderful memory of your mother affirming an important choice you made.

Good advice in the first paragraph, too. I also think that targeting the specific concerns would be helpful.

So I ended up talking to my parents last night, and while I got my mom interested and open to it, I gotta say that my dad was not receptive in the least. I don't think I'll ever know why, because the slide show that I put together was really informative and I think allayed any concerns that they would've had (I mean it worked on my mom). So I don't really know at this point what my living arrangements for next year are going to be because there's still that really small and minute possibility that he could change his mind.

However, if he doesn't, because I know that this is something that I really want to do, do you guys think that it'd be possible to go on through rush and if I do get a bid, pay for it all by myself?

I think that's going to depend on the costs at your school. If you're at a campus without housing and dues are $300/semester, you could probably do that yourself. $3000/semester? Not so much. You could try contacting your Fraternity/Sorority Life office to see if they can estimate costs for you. If not, that's something you should be able to ask chapters about during recruitment if you phrase it carefully.

Not really. The grandmothers could be born in my generation. We were born in the mid-50s. I and most of my friends and pledge sisters now have college-aged grandchildren. We graduated school, married and started families in our early 20s as did our children. We didn't postpone this the way it seems the majority of college educated women do now, but we were hardly teen moms.

There were African American NPC members in the early 70s. They were obviously very rare, but it did happen so theoretically there could be three-generation members. That's not to say I don't agree that it's a dumb visual used in a misguided attempt to convey diversity.

A lot of schools post the financial information on the website or in the recruitment booklet. Remember, that you are not always comparing apples to apples. Typically the dues include different things in different organizations.

There are many members who pay for themselves but it is a lot more difficult. Most have jobs and have very good time management skills. Remember there are certain events that are mandatory for you to attend. Sometimes that can be difficult for people without good time management skills.

Maybe you could ask your Dad what is giving him reservations about you joining a Greek Letter Organization? Good luck to you.

Hi guys!

Today, totally out of the blue, my Dad asked me if we could talk and told me that he was no longer opposed to me rushing! Apparently, the slideshow that I had made along with the discussion he had had with the Panhellenic advisor at my school during the parents orientation had convinced him that going Greek wouldn't be as bad as he previously thought. I'm SUPER pumped and just thought that I'd share because you guys have all been so helpful! :D

That's great :) Good luck with recruitment!

Wonderful! Have a great time...please come back and share your recruitment story!

Best wishes and good luck allykat!

Thanks everyone! :) I most definitely will post my recruitment story. But not gonna lie, I have tons to do in terms of getting recs and figuring out what I'm going to wear...

It's truly best to post after it's over and you've had time to reflect.