Joining another sorority after 2 years
 

Okay so here is my story 2 years ago i pledged a sorority fall semester my freshman year and went through the initiation process. I was a member for only a semester but had to drop out the beginning of the second semester due to health issues. I ended up having to pay spring semester dues since i waited until after winter break to quit. (big mistake $400+ lost) I never attended one event/meeting and they still made me pay. Any way i ended up going back home after my first year to attend my local community college and now im about to graduate and attend another 4-year university. My question is if i will be able to join another sorority when i get to this new university, or will I have to join the same sorority since they do have it at the new school? I never left on bad terms but just could not attend all those meeting while being sick.

Oh and if i sign up for rush should i disclose that i was in a NPC chapter or just let them figure it out if they ever do.

Thanks :)

YOU CANNOT JOIN ANOTHER NPC GROUP!!!!
 

Sorry, chickie!!

And yes...the new groups will probably find out.

Since you were already initiated into an NPC sorority, you may not join another NPC sorority...EVER.

As far as re-joining your sorority, that's something you should ask your HQ, not random strangers on GreekChat.

:( Will you "have to join the same sorority?" Um, absolutely not.

I cannot imagine that your prior organization would even consider extending you another bid. You resigned from that group. You are not a member anymore. They have no obligation to you and you have no obligation or privileges with that organization.

You cannot join another NPC... period. Sorry, you might look into other options like service or local GLOs.

Two years, ten years or a hundred years later, if you've been initiated into an NPC sorority, you cannot "join" another NPC organization. Period. It doesn't matter how special your reason was, it's just not allowed.

And if you did have health problems, I hope that they have been resolved.

The OP might be confused about how she left her organization... if she left her school altogether for health reasons, it's theoretically possible that her organization changed her status to alumna or something like that (I believe Gamma Phi does that when you study abroad for a certain period of time).

The OP is clearly confused about what she can and cannot do, so just to be clear:
-You *might* be able to re-join your organization at your new campus by affiliating with them, but it's dependent on how you left your previous chapter (resigned your membership, or changed status due to leaving school, etc.) and if the new chapter votes to accept your transfer (not every chapter will accept a transfer sister, especially when there are less-than-ideal circumstances around your transfer).
-You are NEVER allowed to join another sorority if you've been initiated into another.

Yes. If her bills were all paid and she left school for health reasons, she may be currently on alumna status. If so, she can ask to go active with her sorority's chapter at her new campus.

Her best bet is to contact her nationals and ask what her status is and what the procedure for being a collegiate member is, at this point.

Good luck, OP

For the eleventy-seventh time: Once you are initiated into an NPC sorority, you may never be initiated into a different NPC sorority. EVER. You WILL be found out.

You may be able to pursue active membership with the chapter at your new campus. You should check with your nationals on this. If this is not possible, you would still be an alumna.

You are free to join a service GLO or a local sorority at your new school.

Hope your health issues are resolved.

So, Idk about other chapters and other schools, but I feel like for us, before initiation, they made a big deal about it being a LIFETIME membership. Shouldn't this be a standard thing? And if it is, how do some people not understand that?

Because everybody is a special little snowflake and the rules don't apply to them. I also think there is an issue with my generation with understanding the concept of commitment.

I think Psi U is right. But I do see a glimmer of hope with her sorority since she apparently paid her final dues. If she hadn't paid I would say she doesn't have a snowballl's chance in hell, but it's worth checking on her status with her org.

HOWEVER, OP, if your attitude stays HAVE TO JOIN, you're going to fall flat. You may well be an alumna and eligible for those privileges, but I don't think any collegiate chapter would be required to take you, even if you did have a good attitude. Start by contacting your headquarters, but be contrite. They owe you nothing and you need to remember that.

And if it turns out you are in reasonably good standing with your sorority, then I'd have a little come to Jesus session with yourself about what a lifetime commitment means.

Question: Don't new member education programs discuss the NPC binding agreement? (i.e. you can't join another NPC).

If they do, with as many posters asking THIS very question, methinks people aren't paying attention in their new member classes.

Mine definitely high lighted it as well. In fact just before we walked into initiation, my New Member Educator specifically said "If you walk into this room, you can never join another sorority." Thought it was weird at the time. I find it appropriate now.

But as every teacher will tell you, there are always a handful of kids who won't understand or hear what you just said five times in a row.

I remember a young woman from my chapter who resigned her membership shortly after being initiated. She was a great girl, but just wasn't very mentally or emotionally present during her new member period. I was grabbing lunch with her a year later, and she mentioned how she had been hanging out with members of another chapter on campus, and those women were encouraging her to rush their house. So there you have several current, active members of an organization, and one recently resigned one, all not understanding their membership commitments!

Here's the thing...I've seen other binding agreements bent and/or ignored. So, if you see that some are, it wouldn't be totally unreasonable to think that this one is not-totally-mandatory as well.

With transferring increasingly common and many local chapters refusing to allow same sorority transfer students to affiliate this rule is way past its sell date. I support it in the same college case but not where the tranfer is to another university and the local chapter refuses to allow affiliation. I can't see who is harmed other than the transfer student who is cut out of greek life at their new school entirely. Just because it is a rule doesn't make it right.

I can understand your logic, but doesn't kind of go against the whole lifetime membership thing?

Um, then isn't the problem the chapters that don't vote for affiliation?

I can see where you wouldn't feel like your lifetime membership means anything when the chapter of your supposed sisters refuses to allow you to affiliate.

My understanding is that the local chapters who don't allow automatic affiliation/refuse affilates are far from "many" - rather, it's the large SEC schools who've gotten burned many many many times by women who purposely pledged a so-so chapter at another school to allow them an easy "in." Just because you're popular, doesn't mean being used for that popularity is a fun thing. Also, the women who do this obviously know or care nothing about sisterhood. They just want social prestige.

If a woman transfers to a new college, in a normal scenario, she should be given every opportunity to affiliate with the new chapter - as I think the majority are - but sometimes it doesn't work out. That's a fact of life. Sometimes it is the transfer student herself who spurns the new chapter, not the other way around.

I don't condone full initiation into another group, rather, relaxing the RM policies so that "social members" are a viable option.

Oh boo hoo for them. Somehow generations of women that came before these special snowflakes survived the tragedy of transferring.

Once you have been initiated, you've witnessed secret rituals that bind the members of that organization. You've taken vows. If you toss it away like it's meaningless, you might as well give up all the NPC unanimous agreements. You cheapen the very foundations of our organizations and the NPC as a whole.

And why limit it to two sororities? What about three? Or four? Or even five? It might take Snowflake many extra years and multiple campuses to graduate. Why should she be penalized for that?

Well I meant more as a concept in Greekdom as a whole, not just for the individual. If the NPC were to allow this, then they are saying that lifetime membership isn't important.

This whole situation reminds me of the stories of vindictive college coaches who restrict the ability of college athletes to transfer to other schools. In one case I remember the coach said the athlete couldn't transfer to any school closer than an 8 hr drive from his school. These coaches have received tons of bad press on this issue.

Huh? I'm sorry I don't see the parallels here.

The reason it's a problem is because 1-these memberships include secret sharing. If members were allowed to join groups willy-nilly, the secret nature of the whole thing would be lost. And 2-this is a lifetime commitment. Now it's true that most girls go into this not understanding that (me included) but that doesn't make it less true. It's a crying shame when you decide to transfer and your sorority isn't represented there. But that's the way the cookie crumbles. And wanting to join a sorority because you pledged, initiated and THEN decided you didn't like them is even less of a reason to be able to join another group. I believe every single NPC sorority allows for some sort of alumna status for collegiates put in this unfortunate scenario. The founders didn't plan for any scenario that was denying you access to the spring formal. And would they change the rules now, understanding that kids these days are much more mobile and less willing to make a commitment for even 4 years? I think not!

I think a factor, perhaps small, perhaps not, is the lexicon. The system is not reminding women they've taken a PLEDGE. The word PLEDGE implies so much more than "new member" in terms of commitment.

I don't see the great harm in leaving these ladies on alumna status. For KD, a transfer student on alumna status has all the rights of an alumna. She can attend chapter and participate in recruitment as an alumna. She can attend any of the events the local alumnae are invited to -- Homecoming, philanthropy events, chapter dinners, etc.

If a transfer isn't accepted for affiliation, it's often because the chapter is at quota or close to it, and they'd like to fill the available spots with freshmen. It doesn't mean that the transfer isn't welcome. If she suits up, shows up, and volunteers to help out, she'll make friends and be included in the chapter's social life.

Imagine what would happen on highly competitive campuses. Women might go through recruitment, be rejected by every single house, transfer to a regional/smaller/less competitive school, get initiated, then transfer back to the original competitive school to be automatically accepted and count against their quota. This would happen all the time.

I agree.

Yep. Welcome to today's college student where every situation is unique! :)

You can accept transfers even if you are above total.

I highly doubt this would happen that terribly often. Women may transfer to Big State U and try to affiliate all the time, but the number of women who specifically go to Small State U to get into a chapter through a back door is more advertised than reality. In my experience in a state that had a Big State U with the supposed issue, all the same chapters at the Small State Univs were also hard to get into.

Also in my experience, however, meeting at least 5 transfers from Big State U during my tenure in at Small State U, they had no interest in affiliating with their chapters upon transferring. (Who am I kidding, I'm talking about LSU and ULM.)

I can totally understand how when someone from [I]little[I] college transfers to [B]BIG[B] U - the girls at Big U want to maintain some control about who moves into the house with them.

Let's review. How about a top five reasons I have heard for transfer?
1. Money situation changes and need to move closer to home or need to save money.
2. Didn't get in at the school they wanted the first time, so they try again and get it on the second try.
3. Program that they want isn't offered at the school they started at.
4. Don't feel like you fit in at your school.
Oh and I almost forgot - 5. a boy (or girl? a sweetheart. whichever.)

I really REALLY feel bad for the folks in category number 1. Bad things happen to good people. Unfortunately, this could mean not being able to fully participate in Greek life at your new school (but in this case maybe early alum status might be a relief?)

In all the other categories - this is why we wanted to give you a 6 to 8 week new member period before initiation. You should see these things coming. You should talk to people about them. They are important. You are talking about the REST of your life.
But hey #2 worked when they didn't get into the school they wanted, right?

It's not always a matter of a top tier house at a competitive campus refusing to affiliate a member transferring from a "lesser" chapter. Here are a couple of other circumstances I have seen play out:

-An intensely academic chapter has maintained the highest Greek GPA for many years and are very competitive about it. Mary Marginal wants to affiliate and her GPA is barely at the national minimum and far below the chapter's minimum.

-At a strong chapter at a smaller regional school where almost all students come from the same general area and everyone seems to have known everyone since high school. Hannah Ho wants to affiliate but her antics at the new college already reflect her legendary patterns of behavior from high school and her previous university.

*snicker*

This is apples and elephants.

A-friggin-men. I feel the same way about getting rid of the word "suicide" and pretending that "recruitment" isn't really still "rush." And not to get on a tangent, but referring to your pledges as "baby [fill in the mascot]s" doesn't exactly convey to them that they are taking on a LIFETIME RESPONSIBILITY. If anything, it does the opposite - lets them know nothing is expected of them except to look adorable and move on when they outgrow it.

THIS!

It also doesn't convey that this is an honor or a privilege?
I thought we wanted them to be ladies?

Originally Posted by 33girl
And not to get on a tangent, but referring to your pledges as "baby [fill in the mascot]s" doesn't exactly convey to them that they are taking on a LIFETIME RESPONSIBILITY

Wholeheartedly agree with both of you. That has turned into one of my biggest pet-peeves; especially considering they are women (I've never heard of fraternities doing this) who will become the leaders of their chapter, and maybe even officers/leaders in the larger organization one day.

I agree. By trying to go PC and get rid of words that have bad connotations, it would appear that some of the ideas have been lost. Mainly I feel this with "pledge". I also feel like most of the PC terms are pointless. Oregon changed "Greek Life" to "Fraternity and Sorority Life" because first term had bad connotations with it. Does it really change anything? No. Does using the terms, rush, pledge, or suicide change the fact that some people will haze or have PNMs SIP? No. It will still happen. Does New Member really carry over the idea that a person is pledging an organization?

Also have seen Linda Lost transfer from one private school to a couple of notches better/same size private school affiliate with the chapter and then stand around talking about how the other chapter and her previous school was better ALL the time. Classic was bringing a friend-who-was-a-girl (not a girlfriend cause that would have been ok, too) to formal because she did not have a date and had the two of them standing around and snarking about other ladies dresses and dates all night. So WHY did you transfer? :confused: