Lesbian denied Communion at Funeral
 

As her elderly mother was dying, Barbara Johnson lay next to her on the hospital bed, reciting the "Hail Mary." Loetta Johnson, 85, had been a devout Catholic, raising her four children in the church and sending them to Catholic schools.

At her mother's funeral mass at the St. John Neumann Catholic Church in Gaithersburg, Md., a grieving Barbara Johnson was the first in line to receive communion.

What happened next stunned her. The priest refused Johnson, who is gay, the sacramental bread and wine.

"He covered the bowl with the Eucharist with his hand and looked at me, and said I cannot give you communion because you live with a woman and that is a sin in the eyes of the church," Johnson told ABC News affiliate WJLA.

Her older brother, Larry Johnson, couldn't believe what he had seen.

"I walked to the side of the church to console her, because she was clearly distraught," Johnson told ABC News.

Larry Johnson said his sister, who has been in a committed gay relationship for 19 years, composed herself enough to give her mother's eulogy, but then he was shocked at what happened next. The priest left the altar, Johnson said, and didn't return until his sister was nearly finished speaking.

Family members added that the priest failed to come to the grave site, and the burial was attended by a substitute priest found by the funeral director.

Larry Johnson and his sister were outraged at what occurred on "what would already have been the worst day of my life," he said.

They want the priest, the Rev. Marcel Guarnizo, removed from dealings with parishioners. They also believe he owes them an apology.

"This isn't about gay rights and it isn't about Catholic bashing, it is simply about the conduct of a reprehensible priest," said Johnson.

But the head of DignityUSA, a group that focuses on gay and lesbian rights and the Catholic Church, sees the incident as part of a wider problem.

"The reality is, in some ways, it is very emblematic of the hierarchy's approach to gay people, transgender people," said Marianne Duddy-Burke. "There are little messages of rejection that happen all the time."

Guarnizo did not return an email asking for a comment about the incident.

The Archdiocese of Washington had no public comment about the priest's behavior, but issued a statement that indicated Guarnizo should have taken up the matter of whether Johnson could receive communion in private.

http://gma.yahoo.com/blogs/abc-blogs...-abc-news.html

Absolutely reprehensible. A good friend of mine was told her gay brother could not take communion (and was generally unwelcome) at her son's first communion ceremony. The entire family has since converted to the Episcopal Church, and their diocese lost three very smart and talented children from their school.

As one of my friends said, if there's any trend some have noticed between members of the clergy and politicians that make such open statements against the gay community, it's that their closets are always full of fun pieces of hypocrisy.

Ugh, how sad.

I am very sad for her but the church's doctrine is the church's doctrine. There may be plenty of hypocrites within the hierarchy of the church but the church's stand on the matter isn't a secret. Membership and participation in a religion isn't a right but those who aren't happy about a church's doctrine do have a right to find another that more closely aligns with their personal beliefs.

when you are raised to believe in something, and that something is one of the only ways to maintain a connection with your deceased mother and find comfort and meaning is not the best time to consider changing religions. I have a feeling that this lesbian is a much better catholic than many other in her congregation.

Funeral arrangements take time, she could have been warned that she would have been denied communion. the priest was exceedingly rude and cruel to this woman and her family. furthermore, by treating her in this way he also showed disrespect for the woman being remembered. she is grieving and she was looking for comfort in the church. a decent human being would have granted her that comfort or at the very least treated her like a person. the church preaches we should love another as jesus loves us... that is its most basic and simple tennant and this priest got it wrong. he should face consequences.

THIS! As an active member of the catholic church, I have to say this whole article makes me cringe. The priest is definitely in the wrong on how he handled the situation. DURING a mass is not the time for him to do these things. If he has approached the family PRIOR to the mass, in private and explained everything, that would have been different. Even if he had done that, she should have been allowed to approach the priest during communion for a blessing.

It sounds like the priest made a major mistake and decided to make a statement at the wrong time.

When I was a Eucharistic Minister in high school and college both times I did training we were told that we shouldn't be making judgement calls on whether or not the person that came up to us was eligible to receive communion. I do not know if the rules are different for priests, and I will concede that they might be.

Regardless, the above posters are correct, there were many opportunities for this situation to be avoided with dignity.

The priest has a right to deny communion to a notorious sinner IIRC, however he should approach that person privately about it.

His behavior during the eulogy (and I am surprised there was a eulogy - it was my understanding Roman Catholic services do not have eulogies) and failure to go to the gravesite is unacceptable.

Generally, they don't. I believe they do allow a family member or friend to speak after communion, but it is supposed to be fairly short. I assumed this is when the "eulogy" took place.

yes!

What a wonderful example this priest set for his parishoners! What will he do next, bring back the inquisition? Perhaps he could add an Auto Da Fe to the funeral service and burn the sinner at the stake.

Last time I looked the message of Christ was all about reconciliation, forgiveness, compassion, and redemption. Did I miss something along the way?

This priest was brutal in his ham handed approach and surely did far more harm than any good that might have come from a loving celebration of the mother's entry into the presence of Our Lord.

I do not argue the Church's dogma and rules, they state the ideal for which I should strive. I do argue that the real often falls short of the ideal and the role of the priest is to lead, help, council, and encourage - not to hold up to public approbation and castigation. I cannot picture Our Lord kicking a grieving woman when she is down. Didn't He say something about "Let the one among you who is without sin cast the first stone"? Something else He said comes to mind, "What so ever you do to the least of my children, this you do also to me!"

In the old days the prayers for the dead included the "De Profundis" which calls out, 'If you oh Lord mark our iniquities who among us can stand!' I get the impression that Our Lord made his position pretty clear - He paid the freight for us and all we are called to do is to accept His gift. I think this priest missed the point.

So, as a deeply convinced and practicing Roman Catholic I offer my prayers for the soul of the mother, calling on the promise of salvation given by Our Lord. I offer my prayers for the consolation of the lady who has suffered both her loss and her pain inflicted by this most disappointing priest. And, I offer my sympathy and condolence.

Preface: I was [poorly] raised Catholic, but I don't currently identify as such and haven't been to mass since I was confirmed. Other than that, I've just been to weddings and funerals.

Any Catholics correct me if I'm wrong because I very well could be, but I seem to recall that certain special occasions in the church invite all attendees to receive communion. Is this at the discretion of the parish/priest? I can't remember if a funeral is one such occasion. I might be making this up. If so, it seems kind of strange that the priest would refuse communion to anyone. Plenty of Catholics who sin receive communion, and any attendee inherently sins according to the Catholic Church because they are not Catholic, but they are invited to receive communion anyway. Just weird.

I'm not about to tell the Catholic church how to operate, though. Sure, I think the priest's refusal is rude and very disrespectful, but keeping public policy out of the church's business is the other half of "separation of church and state". Attitudes and actions like this from the Catholic church are one of many reasons I'd never go back, even if I woke up one day and the theology actually made sense to me.

This is exactly what I was thinking.

I guess the priest also forgot how the Pharisees grumbled about Jesus and said "This fellow welcomes sinners and eats with them." (Luke 15:2) I have a hunch that Jesus feels about what this priest did pretty much like he felt about much that the Pharisees did.

Hmmm...should we look for frodobaggins??? Lolz

Actually only Catholics can receive, and they need to be repentant.

That's cool, but if that's the case then he shouldn't be serving anybody communion, including himself. To deny anybody communion based on "sin", gay or straight is foul as hell.

Not Catholic, but I don't think the Church "permits" that. I think what you're seeing is priests doing it on their own and risking reprimand from their bishops.

Not defending the priest, but to be fair to the Catholic viewpoint, Communion is not being denied on the basis of "sin." From the Church's viewpoint, it's being denied on the basis of lack of repentance and of living in a way that endorses the sin as though it were not sin.

Disclaimer: Not a Catholic

Wouldn't the woman have known she would be refused communion? It couldn't have been a surprise to her that living in a state of unrepentence (according to Catholic teaching) would disqualify her.

And is it possible that the priest didn't come to the burial to avoid more confrontation?

The priest was in a no win situation. He either upholds the doctrines he has promised to uphold or he does something that he knows he is not supposed to do. Yes, he should have handled it differently, but I suspect there may be more to this story than is being told.

There are two sides to every story and the truth is usually somewhere in the middle.

Who may receive communion in the Roman Catholic church?
 

To quote from one of my favorite sites, http://www.catholic.com/tracts/who-c...eive-communion

"The Church sets out specific guidelines regarding how we should prepare ourselves to receive the Lord’s body and blood in Communion. To receive Communion worthily, you must be in a state of grace, have made a good confession since your last mortal sin, believe in transubstantiation, observe the Eucharistic fast, and, finally, not be under an ecclesiastical censure such as excommunication. "

It sounds as if the daughter was not qualified to receive. If she was raised Catholic she should have known that. That said, I think the priest should have simply delivered a blessing and gone on without making a scene.

As to why most other Christians are not able to take RC communion:

"Scripture is clear that partaking of the Eucharist is among the highest signs of Christian unity: "Because there is one bread, we who are many are one body, for we all partake of the one bread" (1 Cor. 10:17). For this reason, it is normally impossible for non-Catholic Christians to receive Holy Communion, for to do so would be to proclaim a unity to exist that, regrettably, does not.
Another reason that many non-Catholics may not ordinarily receive Communion is for their own protection, since many reject the doctrine of the Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharist. Scripture warns that it is very dangerous for one not believing in the Real Presence to receive Communion: "For any one who eats and drinks without discerning the body eats and drinks judgment upon himself. That is why many of you are weak and ill, and some have died" (1 Cor. 11:29–30).

It is very uncommon for individuals who present themselves for communion to be refused. However, the woman should have known that it was inappropriate for her to do so as she was living a lifestyle contrary to Church beliefs and thus not "in communion" with the Church. The act of receiving communion represents that a person is accepting of all Church teachings. In this situation, the woman could have instead presented herself for a blessing, as anyone is welcome to do. I do agree that this is quite an upsetting situation, but the priest probably felt that he was protecting the woman by not giving her communion.

It could be that she attends a different parish where her priest is fine with it. This is true in my mother's parish.

If people didn't take communion due to not following Church beliefs, few would be taking communion or at least where I live. How many parishioners have premarital sex? use birth control? Have been divorced?


I could rant about this for about the next four hours. I'm going to stop myself here.

According to the Church, the rule is that people in such situations are to refrain from communion. I'm not saying everyone actually follows that rule.

The second wouldn't be something that everybody would know and it's possible the third as well. In fact from what I understand according to my spiritual director who is a nun, the fact that homosexuals are homosexual isn't the issue, but the extramarital sex is the issue.

This is very helpful. Even though as a Protestant I might not agree with this teaching, I understand it and can see why the priest would not serve her communion.

This is what I mean by two sides to every story. People will read this story and see "someone gay being discriminated against and humiliated" not "priest faithfully executing his responsibilities to protect the soul of another."

What of all the heterosexual couples who are "living in sin".

Your spiritual advisor is correct. A quote from americancatholics.org: The Priest is actually fulfilling his duties as he sees fit. He did so poorly and caused a lot more damage than good most likely. I am just sick and tired of seeing actions similar to this in the Church. If anyone wants to read the article I quoted it talks of how it can be embarrassing the ignorance that is present and how the Church should be compassionate. Just let me know and I will link it.

Unless the priest has been spying on their bedroom, how would he know? He doesn't. He doesn't know the nature of their living arrangement or what they do sexually. How does the church define sex anyway? If it is intercourse, then Lesbians aren't doing it.

The reality is, most Catholics who are taking communion aren't truly eligible for all the reasons mentioned above.. pre-marital or extra-marital sex, using birth control, having lustful thoughts, not having gone to confession since their last mortal sin, etc. Divorce itself is not a problem though.. not until you have sex with someone else or marry someone else. You can be divorced and chaste and still be in the good graces of the Church.

I'd be interested in knowing what you are basing your knowledge that MOST Catholics are, at any given mass, not eligible. The state of an individual's soul would be, it seems to me, difficult to know. That whole "judge not lest ye be judged" thing - yeah. Even if you are aware of someone having done something which might render him/her ineligible you do not know if they went to confession right before mass for a mortal sin, and of course there is the confession that is a part of the mass. So even if someone came to mass ineligible, he/she could confess during the mass and thus be eligible by the time came to take communion.

It is only when actions are flagrantly in violation of church teaching that priests would be in a position to deny communion. So, if the daughter was presenting herself with her partner as a romantic couple the priest wouldn't have to "spy" on her. There have been a couple of cases covered in the media recently of homosexuals working in Catholic schools who had to resign upon announcing they were marrying their partners.

eta - Is communion routinely given at Catholic funerals? I was Anglican/Episcopalian until a few years ago and haven't been to a Catholic funeral.

Catholic here. As others stated, the priest should have discussed this with the daughter in private before the funeral. If she handled the arrangements, she probably met with the priest to discuss whether to have Mass, the music, and the readings. He could have discussed it with her then. Or before the funeral Mass. Even if he totally botched that and refused her at communion, his disrespect for her mother (who the Mass was being celebrated for) and her as a person and grieving daughter by leaving while she delivered the eulogy/remarks (and yes, I have been at Catholic funeral masses where someone other than the priest delivered remarks, in addition to his eulogy) is chickencrap. And to then not show up for the burial? Craven. Although funeral masses allow closure for those who have been left behind by the dearly departed, it is still about the recently deceased.

The stats about how many Catholics have used birth control are pretty staggering and I think most that do use birth control aren't repentant about it. The confession during mass doesn't really count, although, personally, I count it :)

Is the rule against being a romantic couple or is that you can't have sex? There's a significant difference there. Engaged couples, for example, are romantic couples, but only the two people in the bedroom know if they are having sex.

Per the Catholic church, lustful thoughts are sinful and I don't think most people are truly repentant about those either. "Forgive me Father for I have sinned. I saw a man and thought 'he's hot!'" I just don't see that happening.

Yes, communion is given at funeral masses.

Well Dee, I don't think lustful thoughts are considered a mortal sin, which is an important distinction in the Roman Church.

A mortal sin is any sin whose matter is grave and which has been committed willfully and with knowledge of its seriousness. Grave matter includes, but is not limited to, murder, receiving or participating in an abortion, homosexual acts, having sexual intercourse outside of marriage or in an invalid marriage, and deliberately engaging in impure thoughts (Matt. 5:28–29)

http://www.catholic.com/tracts/who-c...eive-communion

Devil's Advocate
 

Devil's advocate.

Consider this: The priest learned about her homosexuality and called on her privately not to received communion. The lady did not agree, doesn't agree, that the all forgiving God can condemned her for loving another person. Since denying communion is a very serious matter (it literally means excommunication, declaring you out of communion), and since most priest tend to trust the discernment of the person who wishes to receive communion, hoping that there is true repentance, and don't usually deny communion, she stands to receive communion anyways. What should the priest do?

The way he acted was wrong, but wouldn't her actions be wrong as well. She had been told, but since no priest had denied her the communion before, she did not expect for that to happen.

The are a lot of assumptions being made in many comments in his thread. The article doesn't say anything about what happened or if something happened before. What the priest did, showed lack of pastoral care. Yet, we don't have all the information. We could have a prideful homosexual who met a prideful priest, and it became a test of wills.

We don't know if this is what happened, but the story with which I started is true, although this other priest managed it differently (and the person did not receive communion nor the public reprimand).

===

On another matter, in the west, after the sexual revolution cool down, most sins dealing with sex have lost the guilt that came with them, most sexual acts have lost the sinful connotation. That is why most of the Church's teaching on sexuality are ignored, since the Church is believed to be wrong (I am not saying it is or that it is not, I'm just stating a fact.), and that is why they don't see anything wrong with receiving communion. Yet, looking at numbers, Catholics in the east and in Latin America, Africa, Asia, etc. do feel remorse for not following Church's teachings, and even though they still commit the acts, they don't stand up to receive communion. In some way, both are right. If I don't agree that is sin, I have no reason not to receive communion. If I agree that is sin, I do (although the Church's teachings are pretty clear about what is sin).

BTW, impure thoughts are not "She is hot" or "He is sexy." Impure thoughts are reducing the other person to an object and enjoying a mental fantasy with them.

Who can or should receive communion? In the West, society has made it not so clear.