Marshall Tri-Sigma Lawsuit
 

Bad day for Marshall greeks...another article about a different incident

http://www.herald-dispatch.com/news/...local-sorority

"HUNTINGTON -- A Virginia woman has filed a lengthy lawsuit against the sorority Sigma Sigma Sigma, including six of its members at Marshall University, its alumnae organization, its local chapter and its national organization.

The student, Sarah F. Lyon of Clifton, Va., filed her lawsuit last month in Cabell Circuit Court. It alleges she suffered physical injuries and emotional distress, along with fear, humiliation and embarrassment from repeated hazing and harassment during her stint with the Tri-Sigma chapter at Marshall University.

The lawsuit states Lyons was subjected to such treatment, after she brought forth accusations that Tri-Sigma at Marshall had violated policies concerning alcohol in the house and men staying in the upstairs portion of the sorority house..."

(I didn't see this elsewhere, sorry if I missed it.)

I hope the case is thrown out. I don't have much sympathy for people who can't find satisfaction through the traditional means. I mean, I have no clue how the sorority works nationally, but I'd find it hard to believe that THE ENTIRE SYSTEM FAILED HER and she had no other option but to sue.

As an advisor and knowing how the district & national officers of my organization operate, I feel like something is missing here and the entire story is not being told.

Further, if she was so uncomfy about the "sleepover party" that supposedly took place, why did she move in to that house soon after and stay there that long? Sigma Sigma Sigma is a voluntarily organization is it not? She had the right to leave for any reason she wanted to at any time did she not?

I'm a little confused. The only charges that were detailed in this article is alcohol and men in the sorority house. That's not enough to make any sort of case, legally. Sorority wise, yes, but nothing criminal, unless the students were underage, and even then it'd be almost impossible to prove months later. I hope this is resolved quickly.

Paragraph 2 seems to be the basis for civil damages. If proven, that'll mean something. Dunno what, but something.

OMG...I saw people have boys in the house and drink beer. Oh the horror. It's against teh rulz!

I wonder if I could sue the university and the people responsible for the dormitory after 25 years of emotional distress of laughter because my roomate was having inappropriate activities with a young man since she thought I was asleep.
Well maybe she could file a counter suit, since I left the door open for everyone to see.
All I can say is good grief and I hope this case is thrown out.

I don't think the boys and the beer are the issue. It is what happened after she blew the whistle that is at the heart of it. (In my opinion) If the boys and the beer had been handled internally by standards then no one would have been the wiser but word got out who was the squealer and thus we have this..... retribution. The joys of being a chapter advisor/House Corp member.

But even if there was retribution, there would be some sort of internal process for the rat to get due process without the courts. If the sorority did NOTHING, sure, she should sue. But I don't think Tri-Sigma would have ignored it.

Took an interest in this story because my husband is a Marshall alum and we just went past this house last fall when we went back for a visit. I think this
http://www.marshallparthenon.com/new...ters-1.2666312 from the student newspaper does a better job of explaining why she is suing. I'm not saying she should (I have no idea and no legal expertise to comment on the validity of her suit), and some of the information sounds like accusations and counter-accusations, but it does give more detail.

Wow. A couple of thoughts after reading AXOmom's link...

1. There are always two sides to every story, so it's hard to know who's to blame for what. However, regardless of how things got to the point they did, it's clear that Lyon would never fit into the chapter after her letter/paper was read to the chapter. I don't know what Sigma's policies are in terms of active members in this unfortunate situation going alum, but it seems like that could've somewhat solved the problem. Still, it's sad that, even if that was the chosen path, Lyon would never get the sorority experience she was looking for in college.

2. I would be so completely humiliated if my mom went to National HQ on my behalf. I'd have enough of a hard time if she made a phone call, but to GO THERE?!? Wow.

I feel bad for everyone involved. The article reads like there was friction between Lyon and several sisters from the get-go. It's sad that it escalated to this point. What a waste of what's supposed to be such a fun and positive experience.

Does Tri-Sigma have a whistleblower policy?

Some states do have whistleblower policies, but I do not know if West Virginia does.

My question is, what on earth fraternity or fraternity member would make her a little sister??? She seems way too uptight for that. And OHHH. EMMM. GEEEEEE at mom going to HQ.

How big are these houses? I'm guessing they aren't the sort with cooks and such as the one chapter only has 42 members.

I don't want to sound like I'm defending the girl because for all I know she's blowing smoke and this is all a bunch of hoo-haw she made up to get herself out of trouble because she was getting called up for review or whatever its called every 2 months, but if all of her story is true (and I realize that's a big if), then I don't think she's being uptight particularly. I realize its college and college students generally skirt the rules to some degree - but this sounds more like blatant disregard.

We only saw two houses. Husband had friends who were AXO's and he pointed out that house to me, but they are no longer in that house. I don't think they currently have one. He wasn't Greek and didn't know much about it other than that. The two houses we saw (one being Tri-Sigmas) looked like typical sorority houses - not SEC big but not small either.

Uptight wasn't quite the right word I guess - the point I was trying to make was that if she was reporting sisters on things like boys shacking and drinking under the sorority house roof (both illegal according to nationals) it surprises me that she would consent to be an unofficial or official "little sister" of a fraternity (also illegal according to nationals), or that your average college guy would consider a girl who does that a desirable person to wear his letters.

I mean even though this is obviously a she said-they said deal, that seems like an odd thing for anyone to pull out of their rump and call her on if it didn't happen.

^^^True and I see your point.

True, it is embarrassing for mommy to go to HQ for you, but Sigma's HQ is only an hour and a half drive away from her home. It's not like she had to fly there.

Lane Change //

Why is it embarrassing for a parent to step in and assist their child in a situation that seemed to be spiraling out of control? From the post it appears everyone believes mom acted as Super Mom & used her super powers to fly to nationals to take control. I want to believe this was a situation that the family had been dealing with for quite a while. I have a hunch at the point that mom went to HQ to discuss the situation, the girls grades may have been being affected, etc.

We as parents send our children off to college & we try to allow them to learn, grow, & mature - but there are plenty of times when they still need guidance, a shoulder to cry on, & someone to step in & help.

Sometimes 18 to 21 year old girls need their mothers more then 14 yr olds do...& until you are mother of one - Please do not be so quick to judge a mother's choice to assist her daughter if she was crying for help. (if the girl accusations are correct or not) (once a mother cat - always a mother cat )

//

Yeah. But where do you draw the line? I think her mother should have advised her to drop out or call Sigma HQ herself. Driving an hour and a half to Sigma to discuss private chapter business is IMHO way to much. Is she going to go to her daughter's work and take it up with her boss when she doesn't like how things are going in her daughter's professional life? There are appropriate ways for a parent to help a child and inappropriate ways. Going to her sorority HQ was inappropriate.

Because if my child were being abused in the ways she claims, I would immediately remove her from the harmful situation, not expect a national officer to wave a magic wand and make the situation go away. I'm smart enough to know that my involvement in that way will only make things worse, even if the immediate threat is removed by nationals. It seems to me there's a heck of a lot more that happened here and I doubt anyone will ever know all the details.

My child's well being is much more important than any sorority membership, and it seems to me that the mother or the daughter were willing to continue the claimed abuse simply because she wanted to be a sorority member. I still can't figure out why she wanted to continue to be sisters with girls she found so horrible.

LOL...I always love that is one of the first things quoted against involved parents...There is a HUGE difference between helping your children during the college years (while their brain is still maturing, btw) & calling up Steve Jobs to complain about their performance raise.


Here is a possible question...Maybe Mom was a Sigma....article doesn't state one way or the other.

A 20 year old is old enough to be out on their own with their own children. When do you draw the line? And don't act like it doesn't happen, because we all know it does. BTW, I am quite aware of the maturation rate of the human brain. It still doesn't excuse this type of behavior in helicopter parents.

I agree. Helping a child = moral support, not doing things FOR the child. If daughter had wanted to go to Sigma headquarters, and mom decided to drive her there, or even be present (but quiet) for the meeting***, it would be a whole separate matter. The fact is that mom tried to fix it, instead of helping her daughter learn how to best fix it.

***this depends on the type of meeting, too. If there were a legitimate meeting with, say, more than one Sigma rep, I would think it fair that daughter gets to bring a parent/lawyer/whomever so as not to be outnumbered.

When I was in college (hell, when I was in high school) I went to my parents for guidance. I did not ask them to fix my problems for me. They gave me advice, and allowed me, as an adult, to act upon that advice.

Am I a mom? Not for another few weeks. But I well remember how I felt when I was in college, and I can say with absolutely no equivocation that I would have been embarrassed as hell if my parents had done anything even remotely similar. It's one thing to provide advice, it's another altogether to step in and act for them when they are adults and need to learn how to act for themselves.

DZsis&mom, I was a little torn on this because I am also the mother of a college student and truthfully, if it were my daughter and AXO's HQ was in driving distance of me I would be sorely tempted to jump in my car, head there, and give somebody what for. Probably a good thing I have no idea where their HQ is in case such a situation ever came up.

I also agree that regardless of what some 18-22 year olds are capable of doing or accomplishing at that age, most college students are still geared towards thinking of themselves as somewhat dependent on their parents and their parents, since they are usually still financially and physically responsible for them to some degree, are even more geared towards thinking of them that way. And the job/career example really isn't comparable to this situation as it is being described.

Still, after giving it some thought and trying to separate myself from my inner helicopter parent, I concur with the other posters on here who feel that mom going to HQ was a step too far.

While I may disagree with the analogies, I have to agree with AOII Angels primary point. Why in the world would a mom who cared enough to drive to the HQ let her daughter stay in this group, let alone move in. Assuming she's paying for it (don't know that she is), why would she pay another dime for her daughter to stay in this situation? To me the more logical, less intrusive, and simpler step if I were inclined to be that involved as a parent (and I probably would be) is to say, "Look, I think you need to be done with this group and I think you're crazy to move into that house, but if you insist on continuing, you'll be paying for college and your dues on your own."

I don't know who is telling the truth but the timeline makes me question her.

According to the article she witnessed events 4/9/10, complained and the "hazing" began. She initiated 8/16/10.

Question 1 for her: Why did you continue to be part of an organization that "hazed" you for 4 more months and then decide to initiate?

To me this makes no sense. I get she is young but really unless she is so desperate for the need to belong, why would you WILLINGLY initiate into an organization that you claim is hazing you? I don't get it.

Question 2: Why did you move into the house with the women you claim were hazing you?

She then went to honor councils on 10/17/10 and 11/17/10.

She called nationals on 11/15/10 to complain about the "abuse". (So now I question her motives. Did she call nationals because she had only been initiated 3 months prior, had already been brought to honor council once and was about to go a second time).

She was then brought to honor council for the 3rd time 3/15/10 and was told on 3/18/10 that she was about to be brought the 4th time (which could mean loss of membership).

So in 9 months of being an initiated member she was brought to honor council 4 times.

She then moved out of the house 4/3/11.

But then waited to file a LAWSUIT until October 2011.

For me it's like wait a minute.
1. why did you join if you were being hazed?
2. why did you move into the house?
3. did you speak to the advisors or did you go straight to nationals?
4. why did you wait OVER a year to file a lawsuit (which to me most lawsuits are about people wanting money).

The kicker, the trial won't be for another year and half.

Something about what she is claiming seems very fishy to me. Like I just cannot imagine the advisors to the chapter or nationals sitting back and doing nothing, which it seems like that is the basis of her argument. Considering NPC has a no hazing policy and all the sororities have no hazing policies, schools have no hazing policies, I just don't buy it.

Especially if what the article claimed was true, that the chapter had been given 8 sanctions for hazing. If this were true, then they would have been on the Tri-Sigma radar of "we need to closely watch this chapter".

Something about it doesn't make me believe her.

I do think that she did tell and that she did suffer backlash for telling. But I don't think she is telling the whole story, the fact that she was brought up to 4 honor councils in 9 months doesn't say much for her.

Just my opinion.

Because at some point you have to cut the umbilical cord. Also, in this case, mother interjecting herself into a situation which was none of her business could not possibly have helped the situation. When I was an active chapter officer, I had a member's mother call HQ about something I did. She leveled some pretty serious (and totally false) allegations against me and another officer. The other officer got a call from HQ, and this mother and her child were kind of the running joke around there. You call HQ because your daughter can't do it and it's very unlikely anyone is going to take her seriously. In fact, if the chapter processed her out for some reason, your activities in this department are right or wrong confirming to the folks at HQ that indeed there was something wrong with this girl.

"Until you are mother" is such a crap cop out. We don't have kids. My wife is a high school teacher... I guess until she's a mother, she's unfit to teach children? I handle a lot of child custody cases and represent children pro bono in the juvenile system against their idiot parents... I guess I'm unfit to do that because I don't have children myself?

Being a mother doesn't grant you magical insight. In fact, in my experience, it actually makes you a lot less objective about things and can lead to poor decisions such as driving to your daughter's HQ to fight battles which are not your own. If you're fighting all of your daughter's battles for her, are you doing that so you can feel good or are you doing it because it's going to help your daughter learn how to be an adult?

This has been my thought. If it was so horrible, why stay & continue to pay money to go through that? Assuming all allegations are true, I'm by no means excusing behavior of the sorority members named, but this member also had the choice to leave at any time if she felt her complaints were not properly being handled. Membership in any organization is not worth that crap.

If I ruled the world...
 

If I worked at HQ and Mommy showed up to meet with me, first I would only discuss "procedure" i.e., rules/policies, etc. with her. If your daughter is 18 or older, (it doesn't matter if parents are paying dues) I cannot discuss your daughter's situation with you without her written approval. If I have the written approval, then I will tell you everything that I know about your precious child, including things she might not want you to know.

Add to all this the fact that the people working at the national HQ may not be in any way shape or form, the people needed to remedy a particular situation. Our national councillors don't live or work at our HQ, and that's who would have taken care of something like this.

Mom didn't 'step in and assist' her daughter - she took over. She went to her daughter's sorority's HQ when it wasn't her place to do so. Her daughter will never learn to manage adult issues if she's never given the opportunity.

I work daily with college students, and I'm all too often stunned and appalled by their behavior and that of their parents. I've seen parents set their kids' college schedules; I've seen/fielded emails/phone calls from parents asking why their kid didn't get a better grade, or asking to be excused from class meetings; I've witnessed parents going through graduation fairs or job fairs to get information or fill out paperwork/applications for their kid; and yes, I've even seen parents accompany their recent graduates to on-campus job interviews. I can only imagine what happens once Little Darling is hired.

The amount of heli-parenting is out of control. Too many parents feel like they're helping their kids by 'stepping in to assist' when in reality, they're simply delaying the growth that needs to happen. This is creating a generation of kids who can't do things on their own, yet feel entitled to everything they want.

I guess what's sad to me is that Generation Y seems content to have their adulthood delayed by their own parents, and don't seem to be embarrassed when their parents interfere to the degree they do. (Yes, I'm generalizing. I'm aware there are self-sufficient GenY-ers out there. And they're a breath of fresh air.)

As an attorney who practices family law, I've noticed this a lot in divorce cases. The parent's (or parents') over-involvement in intimate marital issues can often contribute to the breakdown of a relationship. I had a custody case recently where I represented a father. I never heard from him but his mother called 2-3 times a week. We finally took the case to mediation and settled it. The next day, his mother called and fired me! I guess they're still going at it, though mother has a pretty binding mediation agreement which was probably what would have happened had we spent the thousands of dollars and heartache it takes to go to trial over custody.

The difference between shielding your child from everything which could possibly cause them harm or discomfort and letting them learn to fight their own battles is not a subtle one.

If you as a parent have no problem "protecting" your child from her sorority, which she could quit and leave at any point, what's to say that 10 years from now, when they're married, you're not going to be that mom who prods her child to produce grandchildren she doesn't want? Who needles at the husband for not making enough money or being successful enough? Where are you going to draw that line? If someone is saying it's fine 'n dandy to repair to sorority HQ to breathe down the necks of national officers about their daughter's potential issues, perhaps that person hasn't really thought much about where that line might be.

Our director of chapter services would have been the person to go to in this situation. That she had correct. What I do not understand is why she did not go first to her chapter adviser (when she claimed she was not being heard out by the process of Honor Council), then to her regional consultant/regional support team, bypassing that potentially if the allegations were serious to the Assistant Director of Chapter Services and later the Director of Chapter Services (which her MOM did eventually get to, but bypassed many layers of support to do so).

I just don't get it. If the allegations were serious, she should have gone directly to her adviser when they began. I also see no notice of her going to the Greek life staff if she really was being abused/hazed. Finally, why have mommy go to the appropriate person months after the fact? There is something missing here, for sure. From reading it, the allegations she was charged with in Honor Council were all legitimate, although they are broad ranging in nature and I don't know if they were founded. I also know that a woman is always allowed to speak for herself during HC proceedings. If that did not occur than she should have gone to the adviser immediately, IMO. Well actually she should have filed for an appeal, which I'm almost 100% positive the adviser attends. I know they attend for level 3 and 4 meetings as well, for sure.


This whole situation puzzles me. I have no idea of the legal case she has. If she really was harassed I don't understand why she stayed. If she wasn't, it doesn't sound like her case would hold up. I can't tell too much detail from the articles and I don't want to prejudge either this woman or any of the other sisters that are involved, but this is just unfortunate all around. Like others have said, it sounds like a bad fit from the get go and just a lot of unpleasantness ever since. I'll reserve other comments until after the trial, if it gets that far. But again, I really hope this is resolved quickly.

Keep in mind that I pledged when it was still called pledging, and we didn't initiate for a whole semester...

One of the articles indicated that she pledged at the end of March and was initiated at the end of April - a month! IMO, one of the biggest repercussions of shortened new member periods is that some info doesn't get the time it deserves. I certainly know nothing about Sigma's new member education, so perhaps my assumption is incorrect, but I wonder if the proper channels of protocol were glossed over. ?? Also, if Marshall students are anything like those I'm around, it often seems like the answer is always to go to the top (President, in academic issues; HQ in Greek affairs) when things aren't going the way students expect. Maybe inadequate info and this mindset are what prompted her to choose the route she did.

I don't know how the market works around Marshall, but April would have been way too late to get other housing for the next fall where I went to school. Practicalities might have taken over.

IMHO
 

I really doubt that there will be a trial. This will be settled out of court.

Agree -
If mom was going to visit HQ...it should have been done only as support. & encouraging daughter to speak on her own behalf.

How did what I say imply your wife didn't have the ability to teach?

Hopefully it will end soon for all parties involved.

Plus the chapter may have had a mandatory live-in policy.

The implication that until you're a parent, you can't possibly empathize or understand something is ridiculous.