HELP! Sophomore Rush?
 

Hey guys! I'm from a small (very small) little town in Oklahoma! I was a cheerleader from second grade all throughout high school before I came to college, and I am a freshman this year. Basically I have been really lonely lately. I have a few close friends, but coming out of the town I came from I knew EVERYONE. I was always apart of something with cheerleading too. I helped with my confidence, discipline, not too mention meeting new people and making friends! Ever since I came to college I have been really missing that. I have really been thinking about rushing here lately for next fall, but I will be a sophomore. I was just wondering how to the rush process works and what it's like being a sophomore and going through that. Also, I never rushed to begin with because I wasn't sure if I was sorority "material" I have an awesome personality (if I do say so myself) and I'm really easy to get along with, but I'm worried that I need more than that. I'm a true blue country girl. I smoke Marlboro reds, drink beer with the guys, and wear blue jeans and cute T-shirt most every where I go, with the exception of the occasional big party. I'm not really one for wearing heels or frilly dresses or anything like that a lot of the time. My main thing is, I want my social life back!!! I'm so lonely that I ACTUALLY miss high school a little...yuck! I want to make new friends that will last a lifetime and have fun with other girls who share my same interests, do date parties, and just have fun in college! I'm scared that my "tomboyish" personality will keep me from getting in one of the houses that I want. I don't know if I should go through rush because of this or not, but I need help! I would love for some advice from anyone who can help with this. Thank you guys so much!!!

Try and fail but never fail to try.

Honestly, you're buying way too much into the sorority stereotype. If you want a social life, there are clubs you can join. Going Greek is a whole other experience.

It is about brotherhood, or sisterhood in your case. If you feel like you have to act a certain way to become "sorority material" then why should you join? It is about being comfortable with them to show your true self.

They have cheerleaders in second grade? For what? Who can climb the highest on the jungle gym?

I'm so glad I grew up when I did, and where I did.

yeah, it's like little league.

but back to the question at hand, we can't tell you how your rush will work out, and smoking Marlboro reds is not something to brag about.

Why is anyone under the age of 25 smoking?? As dangerous as we grew up knowing it is, why would you start? I can see those who started before all the health info was being pushed, but why anyone would start smoking now is beyond me. Stupid.

And then bragging about it, including about what brand, like it makes them cool. No, it doesn't make you cool, it makes you sound trashy.

I get the "bragging about it," but are you really shocked that people under 25 smoke?

No, I'm not shocked. But I still think they're stupid.

Yanno guys that's why I asked for some help. I am absolutely not bragging abou smoking. It's Unattractive, expensive and it smells terrible but I've smoked since I was 16 and it's not a big deal where I'm from. Please understand that the reason I mentioned it IS because I'm buying to much into the sorority stereo type it's all I have to go off of I don't know anything about it, that's why I came on this board and wanted help. My main point was I don't wanna change myself for other people, cigarettes and all I'm a great person and love the person I am. Once again due to the fact that the only thing I'm basing a sorOrity off of may be misleading, that's why I'm here. Please be respectful, I really would like some advice! If material things isn't what a sorority is about then tell me what is! I'm lost here and could really use some advice.

And to Kirain-I don't want to change myself. My biggest question is I'm worried I won't find a house I fit with because of some of my qualities, such as smoking and the fact that let's face it, I don't have much of a sense of style. Basically how important ARE those materialistic aspects? Mainly in rush but for anytime time thereafter too.

If people wouldn't give you a bid because you smoke, or because of your personality, it probably isn't a sorority you would like being in. Screw 'em.

That being said, dressing up more is something you're going to have to do as you get older, sorority or not. Don't be That Girl when you graduate from college who goes into corporate interviews in a belly shirt. Check out some of the style guides in the bookstore to get some ideas of how to dress more grown-up.

Smoking not being a "big deal" where you're from doesn't make it less likely to kill you.

Anyway, we can't answer these questions because it depends on too many different factors. Your best bet is just to bite the bullet and rush. Best case scenario you find a great chapter that you fit in - worst case you meet some girls during rush to hang out with.

Yeah I guess your right. Well does anyone know about doing sophomore rush? Are sophomores less preferred? Ive heard you really need to know someone in a house
To get a bid as a sophomore, is that kind of true?

Also I would need Recs. How does getting those work? One of my sisters friends was a G-Phi but if I rush I'd be more interested in Zeta, Theta, Chi O or Tri Delt. Can she write my rec for those houses or just G-Phi?

Wait. You claim to know nothing about sorority life but already have favorites?

Your question is too campus-specific. At some schools being a sophomore means you better be the cream of the crop. At others it's no big deal at all.

I'm assuming you mean your sister IS a Gamma Phi, and she can write you a recommendation for only Gamma Phi. You need to find other sorority women to write recommendations for their sororities.

And I'm afraid you are doomed to fail since you've already chosen sororities you prefer when you admittedly know almost nothing about sorority life. Do some reading through recruitment threads here. It sounds like you have a pretty big learning curve, but that doesn't mean you can't get there and be happy.

And quit smoking now. We can all give you a whole list of reasons why you probably started and not a single reason to continue, except that quitting is hard.

Depending on the campus, sophomores may or may not have a difficult time with recruitment. For campuses that are considered "competitive" with recruitment, those chapters tend to favor freshmen over sophomores. Other campuses would be more open to pledging a sophomore.

I do not advise you to give away your school. You have already shared much information that would make it easy to figure out who you are, not to mention that your screen name could also be based on your real name. However, you said that you are from Oklahoma, and then mention that Theta is a chapter on your campus. Without calling out any school in particular, I can say with a certain degree of confidence that you are on a campus that is "competitive" unless you attend a school that is at least 2 states away. The campuses that we are on in OK and the immediate surrounding states are competitive.

While it may be tougher to get a bid as a sophomore, it doesn't mean that it is impossible. However, you should have recs to ALL chapters on campus and be open to ALL groups. Read some of the threads in the recruitment section to learn about how you prepare for a recruitment on a competitive campus, including the ones about securing recs.

Good luck to you.

(oh, and just be aware that when you rush, you will be in very close proximity with the sorority girls. Consider taking the next few months to quit smoking, or have a really good plan in place with regards to the odor.)

I call TROLL.

ETA: OP, if you're not a troll, then use the search function. Every relevant answer is in there. Your smoking and your other habits - whatever.

As a sophomore its not a good idea setting your heart on a specific sorority prior to recruitment. You need to go in with an open mind and be ready for cuts and being already settled on specific sororities is a way for big disappointment.

That being said, your sister's friend, who is a Gamma Phi Beta, can only write a rec for Gamma Phi Beta. You'll need to find members of the other sororities on your campus to write recs for their specific chapter.

Yep, there is only one campus in Oklahoma that has Theta, Zeta, Gamma Phi, Chi O, and Tri Delta.

Yikes.

I'm not going to touch the smoking thing, because most of us were young and stupid and did things that we knew were dumb at the time and did them anyways. If it's something you want to quit, you'll quit, but I know a ton of people in sororities at my school that condemned smokers and then would smoke when they drank. (I am not saying that any of you who have posted have done so- I'm just talking about hypocrites I saw in person.)

There are a few people that consider materialistic goods to be the end-all of everything. You can either choose to be a sheep and try to keep up with them and lose your own personality, or you can do what you want and try to find a group of girls that you get along with. If you try to buy a bunch of shit just to make friends, you'll be more unhappy than you are now.

As you can tell, depending on what school you're in, sophomores may or may not have a harder time than freshmen. Either way, if you really want to be in a sorority, you need to maximize your options and get recs for every group, not just those that you think are the best. (And, just out of curiosity, are those ones the ones that you think are the best or are they the ones that everyone thinks are the best? Because those can be two different things.)