Appearance Regulations for Recruitment?
 

Hi everyone! I'm the recruitment director for my chapter and I'm running into a few sticky spots for formal recruitment. Our chapter is only 3 years old, and before my class came in, there wasn't much structure, so I don't really have any rules to follow that were set beforehand. That said, I'm trying to crack down on recruitment regulations for our chapter for a more structured recruitment. So my question for all of you is, what type of rules do you have for your girls during recruitment on things like hairstyles, jewelry, nails, makeup, general appearance, etiquette, etc? What would you do if a girl showed up who didn't follow the guidelines? Thanks for your help!

I'm not quite sure how to comment directly on getting members around to dressing appropriately. As recruitment advisor/advisory board chair I havent had much of a problem overall with getting my members on board with that. I know with my chapter, all members are given a list with photo examples of all attire that will be required for fall recruitment in February and are given constant reminders. I come to the summer recruitment/sisterhood retreat and require all members to bring all attire with them for my approval. We set aside time during the retreat for each member to try everything on and let me & the recruitment chair see it. Those that dont meet the requirements/my approval typically have another 3.5 weeks to get what they need. For good measure I tell all my girls if they have to purchase something to save all receipts & keep the tags on in case they have to take something back. My personal experience is that most members are compliant and if something doesnt meet my approval, it's usually not something major or it is a length issue.

As far as what to do about a member(s) who dont take it seriously and show up in inappropriate/unapproved attire during recruitment--how you handle this will depend largely on your sorority's national policies and your chapter's bylaws regarding member discipline. Your chapter advisors and your district/regional advisors would be your best resource for this kind of matter.

Thetaprincess gave you great info. & advice. I have attended many a dress check in the summer and had to tell a collegian or two that they would need to return their dress, skirt,shorts or what have you. The girls are more likely to accept that from an alumna, rather than a collegiate officer. You should also have a written list of outfits, suggestions on where to get the item and photos if you can provide them. Be sure the chapter officers are on board and determine what penalties will be enacted ahead of time and be sure the members know this.

I'm lane swerving a bit here, but I'd say if you can give them a list of what they need, say, before the end of the semester or shortly after they leave, that gives them the whole summer to shop sales and/or raid their sister's/mom's/friend's closets. I think keeping things basic, like say "Black dress, not strapless, knee length" will go a long way in earning good will, because those items can be worn for more than recruitment. What girl doesn't need a good semi-business black dress? Plus, regulations like that allow girls who are petite or plus size to shop where they need to to get what works for them.

As for how to deal with infractions...I've got nothing.

(At least in my chapter), if you wear the wrong kind of clothes, or your hair/jewelry is inappropriate for formal chapter/ritual, you would be sent to standards. Or you could impose a fine- especially if you have dress checks before recruitment and they fail to make the changes suggested by you and the advisors/alumnae.

When it comes to clothing that's inappropriate, we have a system where sisters with extra approved items would contribute to a communal closet (which was kept by our recruitment chair with a very strict inventory list) in case someone's outfit was not approved. This avoided a lot of stress because it was a way to keep sisters from complaining about having to spend money on things they'd only wear for recruitment.

I don't understand what inappropriate hair/jewellery means. Like, someone died her hair pink? And has some sort of necklace that they can't just take off?

Oh, maybe studded dog collars, skull jewelry, amulets with the blood of a loved one in them (who did that, Angelina Jolie when she was married to Billy Bob Thornton?), shark's teeth, candy necklaces... sorry, not any help, these images just leaped into my brain and they are quite silly, I just couldn't resist!

This varies GREATLY from school to school. If you're at a school where recruitment is very laid back, insisting on manicures and things of that nature is going to make you come off like the bitchy/prissy sorority. Also, don't require things that can be outright unhealthy (like tanning or straightening hair). Just say if you do tan, it should be even...if you do straighten, it should be done right not half-assed.

You should tell the girls what they have to buy BEFORE they go home for the summer (because not everyone lives in a town with a decent mall and they might only make one trip to it while school's out). Rather than just saying "get a black shirt" - find a few that will suit your purpose and have the girls purchase one of those - SPECIFY STORE AND STYLE BY NUMBER. Your school may have regulations about everyone wearing the exact same piece, which is why I say pick a few (enough to get you over the hurdle). Everyone has different definitions of words like classy, tailored, businesslike, etc etc etc. and just saying "you have to wear XYZ77124 from Old Navy" results in a lot fewer hurt feelings than making a girl go out and buy something, having her get it back to school, and then telling her she's wrong (even if you do it nicely)

Oh and if you have bigger or shorter or taller or boobier girls in your chapter, don't pick styles that will make them look horrible.

ETA: refreshing myself on your other posts, you definitely need to tread lightly on the bolded. It sounds like you're going from quite laid back to quite not and if not done properly, it can really backfire. Some of the girls no doubt joined BECAUSE your group didn't have as many rules and regulations on things like this.

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In all seriousness, I'm assuming hair in not-found-in-nature colors or funky piercings. Again, totally depends on your school.

I actually did have a situation where someone for whatever reason dyed a strip of her hair on one side one color and a strip on another side another color. That can happen. I think in this particular instance, it is hair that is over done for the occassion. At my school we have a no frills recruitment format. Thus the attire that is worn by sorority members is expected not have frills--hair is down, not over curled, cant be back in a ponytail, cant be up in a bun, those kinds of things. I will also add that hair needs to be washed, not greasy, and not wet/scrunched (Recruitment takes place in August which is quite humid here).

As far as jewelry goes, I think the main goal is to make sure it isnt too flashy/a distraction, or someone isnt wearing silver earrings with a gold necklace, that sort of thing. Promise/engagement rings & pins are typically the only exception.

She was talking about formal chapter/ritual there and there can indeed be restrictions. But yeah unless you have always been the girl with the pink hair, dying your hair pink right before recruitment would be bad. And if the chapter is all putting their hair 'up' for something, a 'down' look would require fixing. (Short hair excepted or modified.)

Ritual is obviously a whole other cup of tea. And if you're wearing the purple boots with the pink catsuit, well.... standards is there for a reason.

This year, our recruitment chair decided that since our recruitment is usually at the end of September/beginning of October, the "theme" of every chapter leading up to it will be wearing one of your recruitment outfits. (Typically, on my campus, sorority chapters have a theme - dress to pin, tie-dye, etc). This might work if having a summer dress check isn't really doable - for us, lots of girls are from far away and to have them pay to fly in would cause more than a few grumbles.

I didn't read through all the posts here so someone might have suggested this but have girls send cell phone pics of things BEFORE they buy them. If they buy something and it is not approved, the fault is on them. Also, do a powerpoint with LOTS of examples of the clothes you want to see, and try to get those examples from affordable-moderately affordable websites so they know they don't have to break the bank.

Other powerpoint slides can be "yes" (thinking of well put together celebrities) and NO slides (snooki, etc.)

we did this too, it is a great idea because you see what it will look like all together :)

If women color their hair mention a root touch up. I may have a sixth sense for colored hair and roots, I can see a micrometer of growth, and a halo of a different color isn't flattering in any situation, including recruitment.

There are also these guidelines below, sometimes people may not be the best example but are a horrible warning of what not to do. I don't think all of the suggestions below are bad, but the delivery was the issue.

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I have already given directions about which outfits will be worn on which nights so they have plenty of time to prepare for recruitment in September. I was just wondering about everyone's policies, such as if you must have your hair down, no nail polish, no big earrings, etc. I'm not really sure how to go about setting these rules, and just wasn't sure about how most chapters have policies on those types of things. And of course I would never force anyone to go tanning or get a manicure or anything of that sort, just the basic regulations and allowances chapters provide. Also, I'm worried about how to enforce it because we have a couple of girls who sometimes ignore policies (things like dying their hair in an odd way right before recruitment would not surprise me).

This is why you need to have alumnae help you. There will always be a rebel or two, but that doesn't mean that they should be allowed to tank your entire recruitment.

We were sent home with a list of what we would need for which party, and within the first week of classes, we had pass a "fashion show". We didn't have the luxury of a spare closet, but we did have a lot of savvy sisters who brought extra clothing of acceptable sorts. Lots of praise such as, "Oh, that First Party outfit of yours rocks! But this one...." works wonders.

And remember, it takes SEVEN compliments to overcome ONE negative remark.

Also, remind girls that it's ONE (or two or three depending on your campus, obviously) WEEK. They can hold off on the pink hair dye until after recruitment, paint their nails orange after recruitment, etc. And yes, you need alum support, it makes a world of difference

For recruitment, with the exception of pref night, we were told: hair down in a style that works for you (if your hair is naturally curly, you can leave it curly as long as it's neat), natural makeup, and one piece of jewelry (not including small stud earrings) that matches the theme of the night. As for nails, if you're choosing polish, go with neutral shades or natural but clean.

Just saw this and yes, my chapter had those regulations. It seems so tedious to tell girls they can only wear stud earrings, but if looking that uniform is necessary on campus, it's necessary. We also had rules about hair (you need to put effort into it.)

It is perfectly acceptable, and like you said, you aren't asking them to tan or get mani-pedi's--- just leave their self expression when it comes to clothing etc behind for a week/s

What do the other chapters on campus do? I wouldn't go overboard with the matchy-matchy, but a good manicure (and pedicure if your tooties are showing), with or without polish is a must, and a good life lesson. We had girls who were generally opposed to makeup, but during rush it was required (it was the 80's where normal makeup was applied with a spackle). A little discussion about how looking your best is a way of projecting the right persona and what your goals are from your recruitment should help. And definitely do throw an alumna under the bus. That's what they're there for.

If you're at a more or less laid-back campus I wouldn't beat yourself up about all this, but there are times that require a bit more than basic hygiene to fit the mood of the event. And of course basic hygiene is one of those things that shouldn't have to be said, but say it anyway. This is all just future job interview prep!

@Vandal Squirrel, I was waiting for someone to post that. I thought it might be you. :)
"Tacky. Cheapo. Pleather. Don't mess with me."

OP, I get a small sense that you might be having a hard time dealing with people over this issue - if not, no personal offense intended. It could be good to remember that the best way to get people to do what you want is to show them how it will benefit them. You'll have to be very diplomatic in your position, so you might want to add Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" to your summer reading list. Other than that it seems like you're one the right track!

I'm glad I didn't disappoint :D

Other than the gems of outrageous requests/demands, that Cornell student did have some solid tips in her manifesto. It really wasn't what she said as much as how she said it. I have and will say similar things to young women entering the work place and/or leaving college.

Avoid muffin tops, camel toe, leggings that aren't pants worn as such, dark pants/denim are better than bleached and faded jeans. In January avoid summer colors and short sleeves, as well as sleeveless or tank tops, don't be frumpy or over exposed with something low cut. Wear flats and avoid open toe, too high, white, and strappy (hello January!). Appropriate skirt/dress hems and sleeves, shaved legs with tights, as well as color for winter, while avoiding too much cleavage. Jewelry is also on point with classic pieces that can be purchased inexpensively, or be the real thing, and useful for job interviews, and beyond college.

Darn it, the makeup tips didn't make the cut. What she said about smokey eye makeup and eyeliner vis a vis LAXers is quite useful.

We avoided watches as a rule because you wouldn't want to glance at it, out of habit, and appear bored. I think that's a good rule, and then you don't have to worry about what they look like.

Not only do you need alumnae support/involvement, as well as your National Headquarters, your chapter sisters need to get on board. Work with your advisors and resources to include the chapter in this process. If the women believe they had input into the looks for recruitment, as well as the consequences for not following the group, and in Soviet Sorority they will terminate membership and you're seen as Brosephina Stalin.

You've already mentioned before issues with morale and participation so use this opportunity of rush "looks" to get your sisters involved and let them know what the campus and HQ standards and expectations are, and get their input. If they help decide the punishment it won't be a surprise and not something you decided and had to enforce. Also their involvement will hopefully create expectations that are realistic and the majority will be comfortable with. If you have 100% compliance but women feel awkward with their appearance it will be obvious and just as bad as Vibram 5 finger shoes, eye brows that look as if they were done with a Sharpie, cut off acid wash overalls with a racer back body suit unsnapped in the crotch worn with a regular bra, and a zig zag part of blonde dyed hair that makes her head look like a Charlie Brown shirt.

My last bit of advice is if you have dresses and skirts at Preference. Make proper under garments mandatory. This means bras that don't show, shaper/smoothing (aka control top) panty hose or tights to prevent undergarment lines, and look into slips, half and full. Not only are slips ideal for any sorority who wears white or other light colors for initiation, they are great for sheer or light colored skirts and dresses with little to no lining. Half slips can be purchased at Walmart for under ten dollars if money is an issue. Instead of white undergarments a "nude" color is better and there are often shades in many stores to cover all kinds of "nude" and black is useful as well since many business and evening clothes are darker colors.

Some people may go against pantyhose but they are forgiving if someone has scars, missed a spot or cut themselves while shaving, and can prevent blisters in shoes. They can also do double duty under dress pants and cut down on clothing bulk if a woman wants a smoother or shaper. Keep clear nail polish on hand for runs, and also static spray so no one has a skirt that creeps. This whole rush clothing process may introduce some sisters to being properly fitted for a bra, learning about hair and skin care as well as makeup, and don't forget that a little tailoring and seamstress work can make a woman look and feel amazing. Your alumnae, as well as moms, grandmothers, and aunts may have sewing skills, as well as hair and makeup skills. Make the process fun and about trying new things and being who y'all are. Going to the makeup counter at Macy's or Sephora in JC Penney is a way to build sisterhood while still getting chapter work done.

One thing no one has mentioned is that you should also have reasonable goals. Look at your sisters. If 25% of them won't follow these grooming tips to the T, you may be trying to push a laid back chapter too quickly into a Barbie type chapter. Pick your battles and change a few key things ever year if they're going to be a huge deal. As much as these things "matter," PNMs will be able to pick up strife if you have a bunch of pissed off women who were forced to do something they're not happy about.

I did dress check last summer and had to suggest only a few girls exchange some items. Actually I let the officers make the decisions and they conferred with me-they were always spot on. If a girl bucked and argued with the decision then I stepped in. One neat outfit they had was a Kelly green top. The parameters were the color and that it be sleeveless or short sleeves. It was amazing to see the variety of blouses that the girls bought. By only specifying the color and sleeve, the girls were able to choose a style that flattered them. I think that they wore them with dark wash jeans(straight legged) and a strappy, heeled sandal and gold jewelry

Other recruitment v.p.'s have been more specific, I.e, you will buy an orange, yellow or pink v-neck, short-sleeved t-shirt from lands end #blah,blah,blah and khaki Bermuda shorts from jc Penney. We will sperry top-siders and will pull our hair back in pony-tails with ribbon to match your t-shirt.

*like*

A sanction that typically works for the chapter I advise is that if someone violates dress-code for that day is that they are put on the clean up crew for either that day or bid day. No one wants to be stuck picking up while everyone else is either sleeping, eating or celebrating.

The advisors pull the offenders aside and tell them that they are being asked to stay to clean up because they violated the dress code. It cuts the board members out who are busy doing other things.

Ummm, gang, read the rest of her posts. I honestly think the LAST thing she needs is alumnae support (from her chapter's alumnae at least).

Again, it all depends what other chapters on campus do. It also depends on how much you'll be "putting on." Matching outfits and such are one thing, but don't ask girls to get (example) fake nails if they never wear them - they'll be uncomfortable, and you'll look like a bunch of phonies. AOIIAngel pretty much hit the nail on the head.

If you have sisters that would dye their hair pink before recruitment just to "make a statement" or piss people off...you have deeper issues that matching polo shirts are NOT going to fix. It would behoove you all to try and fix them over the summer so you can present a united front to the PNMs in fall.

One of the other chapters in my area, actually ordered the same cute top from an online retailer (for around $15) and each girl in the chapter got to pick out what color she wanted. The top was a basic staple and looked good on most body types. They could select their own bottom (pants, skirt, etc.) as long as it was khaki. It looked nice on the recruitment floor and it actually was a shirt they could wear again.

That's the easiest way to go - but some schools have "no frills" rules about everyone not wearing the same top (even if it is different colors). So you have to be careful about that.

One of the girls in my chapter showed up for the super casual open house night with over exaggerated bright pink blush and hot pink/purplish lipstick. The whole look would have been more appropriate for a theatre production and she was told to remove it. It's all about looking natural and approachable, IMO. Definitely great advice being given on here!

This doesn't really answer the OP, but I think this thread is really interesting- everyone does recruitment dress so differently. On my campus, panhellenic has really extreme restrictions on what we wear for every round except pref. We have to wear letter shirts that cost under a certain (reasonable) amount apiece, and the chapters can choose either denim or khaki bottoms and "comfortable shoes," meaning they can't make us wear heels. Everyone looks nice and put together and matches (chapters bulk order different letter shirts for each round) and it helps prevent showing off each group's "status," although it does limit expressing our personality via wardrobe. We just have to be really good talkers! Our campus takes no frills to an extreme.

For pref, we are allowed to wear whatever is "traditional" for each org (black dresses mostly).

We bulk-ordered shirts for the first round, and they were usually some variety of black...so, to prevent fading and/or different colors on the second day of first round, we weren't allowed to wash them. We had to just Febreze them and throw them back on.

If they're fading after one wash, I would say you need to get higher quality shirts. Or enlighten people to the concept of washing dark things in cold water.

The chapter I advise did a powerpoint slide showing EVERYTHING acceptable they would need to purchase, including the appropriate jewelry and shoes. As for hair and nails, we always told them they had to have their hair styled (as in not wet, not scrunched..they had to have it down and curly or straightened) and STRONGLY RECOMMENDED a fresh haircut and dye job if needed. Manicures were always either french, nude or clear polish, no colors. We actually did a sneaky way of getting the girls to go tanning, we would have tanning parties at the local salon during spirit week where they would serve non-alcoholic drinks and snacks and offer us HUGE discounts.Tanning wasnt an issue that we enforced. We would also have outfit checks where girls had to present themselves to the recruitment chair and an advisor in all their outfits WITH hair done, shoes, nails, jewelry,etc. So when all was said and done, if there were girls that didnt follow the regulations and guidelines, and they didnt fix the problem,they didnt recruit, plain and simple. Instead they had to do the boring tasks like work in the kitchen and plate snacks, set up crafts for Philanthropy Day etc. Hope that helps :)

That's fucked up.