do I have to party?
 

i'm thinking of joining a sorority, mainly to meet new people and more of a push to maintain a good gpa. i'm not big on drinking or partying for that matter. if you're in a sorority do you NEED to go party and drink?

Not at all. It's not a requirement of being in a sorority. Some sisters might like to go out and party, but in no way are you obligated to join them. Granted, some chapters might have more party-going sisters than others. Keep that in mind during recruitment, and be honest with yourself with where you'll fit in and where you won't.

>implying people need to drink and party

http://i52.tinypic.com/28kob5t.jpg

Seriously, there will be girls in whatever house you join that will party, and girls that do not or party less. I wasn't that much of a partier, but I was never forced to go out and/or drink.

vivalacutie, I remember you saying you're going to FIU, right? The sororities there are large enough to have a lot of different kinds of girls. In a group that large, interests are going to vary widely and I'm sure you would be able to find friends like you. I am not a huge partier and I have found an amazing group of close friends within my chapter, and I am comfortable with everyone. If any sorority women pressure you to drink or party, something is wrong.

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what YOU think it means!;)

Do you need to drink? No. Do you need to do drugs? No.

Do you need to be sociable? YES.

If you don't like to go out every weekend, that's fine. However, if you are planning to only go to meetings and rituals, and never go to mixers, formals, or random parties with your sisters, you should probably skip sorority membership. Many sororities include social development as a main component of membership.

If you are looking at a sorority as "a push to maintain a good GPA" - I think you need to find a different "push." Maybe, um, getting a good job when you graduate?

You don't have to drink, do drugs, party, etc. just because you are in a sorority. You'll find a wide variety of sisters - people who are obsessed with GPA and only go to the occasional mixer or sisterhood event, people who never miss a social event and are also involved in other activities, and everything in between. And, yes, you will probably come across women who take every opportunity to get falling-down-drunk ... and typically they end up before the chapter's standards board.

So, no, you don't have to party and drink, but you do have to be willing to socialize with your sisters, go to a mixer or three, and participate in the chapter's community service work.

You can party without drinking.

You could go to parties to be social with your sisters.

Idk about that. I went to some functions throughout my membership--and enjoyed them, even though I didn't drink--but for the last two years of college, I had a job where going to parties could be a serious risk to my continued employment (I ran psychoed groups for students referred for MIPs or dorm write-ups, and while going to open parties wasn't prohibited in so many words, it was made clear that being at parties where people got "busted" or drinking irresponsibly ourselves was a really inadvisable idea. And of course, drinking under age--and I was underage until senior year--was an automatic no). So, I went to maybe a grand total of 2 parties outside of my chapter's functions (maybe 4-5 of those). I only went out drinking a few times senior year and drunk pretty minimally those times.

And you know what? I still made amazing friends with my sisters and have amazing memories. One of my best friends has never gone to fraternity party and rarely if every goes to functions, and yet still loves and gets a lot out of her membership. Movies, coffee dates, "study parties," campus activities, even just sitting around the dining room and chatting... all are ways to be social without going to parties.

^^Yes, but in the years BEFORE that, you DID go out to parties. And from your post, you DID still go to chapter social functions (i.e. mixers and formals where the drink-dispensing onus is on a third party).

I just don't understand the concept of joining a social organization if, from the jump, you don't want to attend social functions.

Yes, If the OP wants to join an org for the purpose of meeting new people while raising her GPA a professional or academic based org could be a better fit for her.

At least be publically nude once.

Like most people say, no. However, in some chapters girls that do not go out/drink is more rare though. Try to find one that has a good mix of girls. There are girls (in my chapter, at least) that do not drink and are very studious but still go out to parties where people do drink (and have a great time) and others that go out every single night almost without fail.

And like someone said above, the second group of girls usually end up in front of the standards board. Or they have their social privileges revoked for falling below the required GPA.

Yes, I went to a few but not all by any stretch of the imagination. My friend has gone to zero. She still loves--and has fun--in our sorority as did/do I. Social does not equal only parties.

OP, like most everyone else has said, no you don't have to party. How much or how little time you spend out at parties, or official events, or other orgs parties is all up to you. Your dues include a lot of those costs though so if you DO want to go out, those events are a good way to do it. If you don't, you'll have plenty of other ways to be social with your sisters, through non-partying events.

no, but you should be prepared to have to put in extra effort to bond with your sisters in other ways. i don't drink and i'm a happy, involved member of the chapter with the party reputation - but while other sisters in my pledge class grew close seemingly instantly after several weekends going out with one another, i had to try a lot harder to find ways to spend time with my sisters. not to say there aren't plenty that don't drink either, but i had to find them and find fun ways to hang out.

i've also gone to a few parties, but i understand if you don't want to - it's hard to have fun at some of the crazier parties where you're literally the only sober person there. i tend to stick to the more low-key parties and hang out with some of the other DDs.

anyway, if you really want to be close to your sisters, you aren't going to have in your arsenal one of the easiest way to bond. so join committees, plan silly girly sleepovers and trips to local amusement parks, go to every philanthropy event (or almost, still keep school a priority), even if you don't have to. if you have a house, make it a point to just hang out there, even though it might be awkward at first. arrange study get-togethers with snacks.

basically, your level of closeness with your sisters is entirely up to you, and you don't have to party to become an involved, happy, well-liked sister.

The enter key is your friend!

oops, sorry :o is that better?

^^ Yes thanks. It's just very hard to read otherwise ;)

This is also VERY true. Not all parties (fraternity or non) and bars/clubs (if you're allowed to be in the latter and not drink when you're 18) are created equal. There are some that just aren't going to be fun unless you're drinking like a fish, and there are some where you can be sober as a judge and still have an absolute blast. You have to get out there and see which ones are which, though, not just reject ALL of them from the start.

Agreed. Also, when you have themed mixers or whatever they're called these days, half the fun can be getting your outfits together beforehand.

This. And even if you're not going to the mixer/theme party, it can be fun to go to Goodwill/Walmart/whatever to try to find costumes with those who are going. It also gets more fun after freshman year when everyone isn't immediately defaulting to "sexy ____." Some of my costumes that were the biggest hits weren't attractive at all. My goal was always to be the girl with the most unique/ridiculous costume.