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krose 10-24-2010 05:06 PM

recruitment advice for juniors
 
I am a junior, but this is my first semester at this particular college. Penn State. I went through some COB parties for some of our sororities, but didn't get a bid. I decided to give formal recruitment a try, but because of conflicting classes and party schedules I wasn't getting the experience I had hoped for, so I dropped. After recruitment was over I was invited to some more COB parties, but it seems like I am probably not going to get a bid from any of the groups as I haven't heard back and it has been 2 weeks since the first parties I went to and almost 2 weeks since the last parties.

I'm really starting to feel discouraged. I didn't realize how hard it would be to join a sorority as a junior, especially since so many students transfer here as juniors. The girls in the Greek Life office assured me that I should keep trying, some sororities even take second semester juniors during spring informal. I honestly felt like this fall was my last chance, I know it will be a challenge to get a bid in the spring.

I heard some schools don't count juniors/seniors towards quota but I don't think my school is one of those schools. I think a lot of the girls that COB after recruitment have similar concerns. We never knew how we would be contacted if we were to recieve a bid, or how long it takes to be contacted. I would leave parties not knowing how to feel because I didn't want to get my hopes up. I know that everyone says to trust the process, you will end up where you are meant to, etc. I don't mean to sound so depressing but you can imagine how I felt coming to this school. I was so excited to get involved in greek life, and then every attempt I made has been unsuccessful.

Does anyone have any advice?

Titchou 10-24-2010 05:12 PM

First of all, your Greek life office can tell you whether upperclassmen have a separate quota. We can't. Second, they can also tell you how many upperclassmen get pledged as a rule. We can't. Third, no one here can tell you what your chances are. That's private membership selection information.

All that being said, do you meet the GPA requirements? Do you have activities? Did you have all your recs in? In other words, did you cover the basics? And lastly, how did you feel at the parties? Did you enjoy yourself and let them know? Did you let your favorite group know you'd like to join? How - or did you - show interest?

These are the simple basics of recruitment.

krose 10-24-2010 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Titchou (Post 1997334)
First of all, your Greek life office can tell you whether upperclassmen have a separate quota. We can't. Second, they can also tell you how many upperclassmen get pledged as a rule. We can't. Third, no one here can tell you what your chances are. That's private membership selection information.

All that being said, do you meet the GPA requirements? Do you have activities? Did you have all your recs in? In other words, did you cover the basics? And lastly, how did you feel at the parties? Did you enjoy yourself and let them know? Did you let your favorite group know you'd like to join? How - or did you - show interest?

These are the simple basics of recruitment.

thanks for your reply, I wasn't asking my chances of a particular sorority exactly, but just wondering if it was possible that I could get a bid in the spring as a junior. Basically asking if anyone here had it happen to them. I should probably ask our VP of membership though.

and yes, I met the GPA requirements and I am involved in a couple other activities on campus. We don't have to have recs but I felt that I had a lot to offer and covered the basics. At the COBs I felt welcome and involved at the parties. I am typically a shy person but I found it really easy to open up and had great convos with the girls I talked to. I made sure to tell the sororities I was interested in that I liked their sorority and for what reasons. I didn't flat out say, Hey XYZ I want to be a sister. I feel like that would have been rude or would have made it seem like I thought I was in already, but I did make a point to show interest without seeming cocky or over confident. I honestly feel like maybe I just don't stand out enough. If fall recruitment doesn't work out I will definitely try in the spring, I know i will regret it if I don't at least try.

Titchou 10-24-2010 05:49 PM

Get your grades up. You need to do more than "meet" the requirements. Too many others exceed the minimum so the more you can stand out academically the better. And a couple of activities probably isn't enough unless they are significant ones - like officer in SGA, etc. Only PH can tell you if upperclassmen get bids at YOUR school. We can't. And the fact that you dropped out of formal really could be strike against you. When you are at recruitment parties - COB or formal - you need to let them know that class conflicts caused you to drop out last time. However, since you've named your school and upperclassmen with your history are going to be few and far between, they'll probably already know you posted here....and that may not bode well for you.

DeltaBetaBaby 10-24-2010 05:51 PM

It is my understanding that there are always groups at Penn State that are under quota/total. So, my very first question would be whether you have attempted to visit ALL groups doing COB. If you go through recruitment in the spring, it is very likely that the same groups willing to take juniors are the ones that would be doing COB now.

I'm also unclear what you mean by "not the experience you had hoped for". Does that mean you did not get invited back to the top chapters and dropped out? If you have your heart set on one or two chapters, it's probably not going to work out for you. My best advice at this point is to look at ALL chapters and if one of them really wants you, give it a shot.

nittanygirl 10-24-2010 06:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 1997345)
So, my very first question would be whether you have attempted to visit ALL groups doing COB.

This.
Yes, juniors get bids at Penn State, but I've never even heard of a situation where they were not cut from nearly all "top tier" groups in formal recruitment from various people I've known that did formal.
Be open to all groups, email the recruitment chairs of the sororities you haven't visited to set something up. You might get a bid, you might not, but if you don't utilize all your options, you may never know whether you might have loved it somewhere.

KSUViolet06 10-24-2010 07:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krose (Post 1997332)
I am a junior, but this is my first semester at this particular college. Penn State. I went through some COB parties for some of our sororities, but didn't get a bid. I decided to give formal recruitment a try, but because of conflicting classes and party schedules I wasn't getting the experience I had hoped for, so I dropped. After recruitment was over I was invited to some more COB parties, but it seems like I am probably not going to get a bid from any of the groups as I haven't heard back and it has been 2 weeks since the first parties I went to and almost 2 weeks since the last parties.

I'm really starting to feel discouraged. I didn't realize how hard it would be to join a sorority as a junior, especially since so many students transfer here as juniors. The girls in the Greek Life office assured me that I should keep trying, some sororities even take second semester juniors during spring informal. I honestly felt like this fall was my last chance, I know it will be a challenge to get a bid in the spring.

I heard some schools don't count juniors/seniors towards quota but I don't think my school is one of those schools. I think a lot of the girls that COB after recruitment have similar concerns. We never knew how we would be contacted if we were to recieve a bid, or how long it takes to be contacted. I would leave parties not knowing how to feel because I didn't want to get my hopes up. I know that everyone says to trust the process, you will end up where you are meant to, etc. I don't mean to sound so depressing but you can imagine how I felt coming to this school. I was so excited to get involved in greek life, and then every attempt I made has been unsuccessful.

Does anyone have any advice?

Paging nittanygirl! She's a new-ish Penn State Greek.

It is my understanding that there are always several chapters at PSU who hold spring COB.

I think it's worth a shot for you to check out some groups during spring and see what happens.

If you DO decide to go ahead with spring, my best advice would be to be open-minded.

If there are some chapters participating that you didn't check out this fall, be sure to give them a shot next time. You never know, you may end up really liking them.

You may get a bid, you may not. But what do you have to lose?

Good luck!

nittanygirl 10-24-2010 07:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 (Post 1997365)
Paging nittanygirl! She's a new-ish Penn State Greek.

Ah! We were answering at the same time!!

But I should have added, that I received a bid as a junior.
My best friend went through formal this year as a junior and received a bid as well. She kept her mind opened & prepared for heavy cuts (which happen) and she ended up in a chapter she loved.
Also, that I know there are chapters that are still looking.

33girl 10-24-2010 07:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krose (Post 1997339)
At the COBs I felt welcome and involved at the parties. I am typically a shy person but I found it really easy to open up and had great convos with the girls I talked to. I made sure to tell the sororities I was interested in that I liked their sorority and for what reasons. I didn't flat out say, Hey XYZ I want to be a sister. I feel like that would have been rude or would have made it seem like I thought I was in already, but I did make a point to show interest without seeming cocky or over confident. I honestly feel like maybe I just don't stand out enough.

I'm guessing you mean the COB parties held before formal recruitment this semester. nittanygirl or psusue - were those open to anyone who wanted to come or did you have to be invited?

If they were open to anyone and you did not attend all of them - i.e. picked and chose - this probably did hurt your chances in formal recruitment.

DeltaBetaBaby 10-24-2010 07:52 PM

Oh, here's another thing. If you really, really, want to give it your best shot during spring COB, you need to ask a brutally honest friend or two for feedback on how you present yourself. Any friends from high school or something who are in sororities at other schools?

We don't know you. We can't tell you if you are the shy girl who comes off as too good for everyone or the girl who is tomboyish, but comes off as not giving a shit about the effort that the chapters have put into recruitment or the girl who is trying so hard to be social that she comes off as an RM violation waiting to happen.

nittanygirl 10-24-2010 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 1997374)
nittanygirl or psusue - were those open to anyone who wanted to come or did you have to be invited?

From what I've seen, it tends to vary.
I know of one chapter that seems to always have an open party in the fall, then they do "invites back" but I know of other chapters that are strictly invite only. And then some that are even more laid back without actually having events per se.

krose 10-24-2010 08:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 1997345)

I'm also unclear what you mean by "not the experience you had hoped for". Does that mean you did not get invited back to the top chapters and dropped out? If you have your heart set on one or two chapters, it's probably not going to work out for you. My best advice at this point is to look at ALL chapters and if one of them really wants you, give it a shot.

What I mean by that is, I went in with an open mind, since I don't know anyone here I didn't know anything about the chapters. I didn't have my heart set on anyone, I don't even know what the top chapters are here, but I knew a couple I just didn't mesh with. I always left their parties feeling disappointed. When first rounds was starting and I got invited back to 5 parties out of a possible 14, I didn't let it bother me and went to all the parties and made the best of it. Then I was dropped by all but one (one of the groups whose parties I did not enjoy), and maybe it was a bad decision on my part but I had class during the party so I couldn't go. I decided to drop because if by chance I had made it to pref night I would have had to miss that too because of class. I thought my chances of getting a bid weren't good, and even if I did get a bid it was to a chapter I didn't feel I would want to pledge.

KSUViolet06 10-24-2010 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krose (Post 1997402)
I thought my chances of getting a bid weren't good, and even if I did get a bid it was to a chapter I didn't feel I would want to pledge.

If you don't mind my asking: How do you know that when you said yourself that you just came school in the fall?

I can maybe see a junior saying that who maybe has been on campus a few years, but I'm curious as to how someone could make this determination having just arrived at school a few months ago.

krose 10-24-2010 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 1997374)
If they were open to anyone and you did not attend all of them - i.e. picked and chose - this probably did hurt your chances in formal recruitment.

I did not by any means try to pick a choose but sometimes it was unavoidable, like when two sororities would schedule a party on the same night at the same time. (during COB pre-formal)

krose 10-24-2010 08:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 (Post 1997403)
If you don't mind my asking: How do you know that when you said yourself that you just came school in the fall?

I'm not saying I know for certain but the whole time I was talking with the girls it just didn't feel like I belonged. It's nothing against them personally at all. I'm not sure if I can explain it without sounding naive. Basically I was unsure about them, didn't ever have good feelings when I left their parties. If I had gotten a bid from them and turned it down I couldn't pledge again for a year. So the way I see it is now I can still go to their COB events and see how I feel about them, but if I had gotten a bid from them from formal I can't say that I would have been okay with accepting it, and I wouldn't have been able to cob after recruitment or rush in the spring.

DeltaBetaBaby 10-24-2010 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krose (Post 1997410)
I'm not saying I know for certain but the whole time I was talking with the girls it just didn't feel like I belonged. It's nothing against them personally at all. I'm not sure if I can explain it without sounding naive. Basically I was unsure about them, didn't ever have good feelings when I left their parties. If I had gotten a bid from them and turned it down I couldn't pledge again for a year. So the way I see it is now I can still go to their COB events and see how I feel about them, but if I had gotten a bid from them from formal I can't say that I would have been okay with accepting it, and I wouldn't have been able to cob after recruitment or rush in the spring.

Did you go to COB events for that group? They're clearly the group that is most interested in you.

krose 10-24-2010 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby (Post 1997422)
Did you go to COB events for that group? They're clearly the group that is most interested in you.

I have been in contact with the president and we are trying to set something up. I am not writing them off completely, I just don't think I would have been able to commit to them without checking all of my options first, if that makes sense?

nittanygirl 10-24-2010 10:49 PM

Having done COB events, formal & then more COB events, you have exposed yourself to all the groups in the NPC on campus.

If this is not working out for you, I suggest you maybe check out other sororities on campus that may take juniors.
There are two service sororities, several multicultural sororities, engineering & ag sororities here at Penn State if you feel you need to look into other options.

33girl 10-24-2010 11:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krose (Post 1997406)
I did not by any means try to pick a choose but sometimes it was unavoidable, like when two sororities would schedule a party on the same night at the same time. (during COB pre-formal)

I find it hard to believe that the ONLY time a sorority scheduled a party and didn't hold another one was opposite another group. That's just dumb on their part. It's COB, they can have as many parties as they want - or, as nittanygirl said, events that aren't even parties. If that is the case though, you should have let the other sorority know you weren't blowing them off completely - they may have made an effort for you.

nittanygirl 10-25-2010 09:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 1997475)
I find it hard to believe that the ONLY time a sorority scheduled a party and didn't hold another one was opposite another group. That's just dumb on their part. It's COB, they can have as many parties as they want - or, as nittanygirl said, events that aren't even parties. If that is the case though, you should have let the other sorority know you weren't blowing them off completely - they may have made an effort for you.

krose is not completely off-base on this.
I had considered COB last fall and there were groups that had events at the same times. This was an issue last spring as well which is why they held a structured informal instead.
Acknowledging that, I still think if she would have let the sorority know she was interested but couldn't make the time, that they might have worked something out to meet with her.

psusue 10-25-2010 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nittanygirl (Post 1997564)
krose is not completely off-base on this.
I had considered COB last fall and there were groups that had events at the same times. This was an issue last spring as well which is why they held a structured informal instead.
Acknowledging that, I still think if she would have let the sorority know she was interested but couldn't make the time, that they might have worked something out to meet with her.

Co-sign on this. When I was beginning my journey into Greekdom, I looked into several COB parties before formal recruitment and some did indeed conflict. However I don't think there was ever two sororities who scheduled their parties at the same time that did not also offer at least one other party you could attend, if that makes sense.

Also you could have contacted the recruitment chairs about the conflict. If they wanted to, they could have worked something out with you to still meet you. Best of luck to you.

DeltaBetaBaby 10-25-2010 09:02 PM

Look, the bottom line here is that the OP went through formal recruitment and was dropped by all the groups but one. Her best bet is to see if that group is still willing to get to know her.

Blue Skies 10-30-2010 01:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by krose (Post 1997410)
I'm not saying I know for certain but the whole time I was talking with the girls it just didn't feel like I belonged. It's nothing against them personally at all. I'm not sure if I can explain it without sounding naive. Basically I was unsure about them, didn't ever have good feelings when I left their parties. If I had gotten a bid from them and turned it down I couldn't pledge again for a year. So the way I see it is now I can still go to their COB events and see how I feel about them, but if I had gotten a bid from them from formal I can't say that I would have been okay with accepting it, and I wouldn't have been able to cob after recruitment or rush in the spring.

If you are unsure about them, then you should definitely give them a shot. You'll know when a group is absolutely, positively NOT for you. But the group that you are unsure about might be your home!

I would encourage you to give it one more try at spring informal or COB. You are obviously interested in greek life, why not?

Bronco 11-12-2010 04:40 AM

Does every school have a greek life office to ask? I'm a junior doing COB events in the Spring and I don't see any information about an office for greek life on my school's webpage. I would like to know if upperclassmen count for quota.

Also, let us know how it goes krose. It can be really nervewracking to go through being a junior and everything so know you're not alone!!

FSUZeta 11-12-2010 08:50 AM

it may fall under student life, campus organizations or the dean of students.

33girl 11-12-2010 09:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bronco (Post 2003204)
Does every school have a greek life office to ask? I'm a junior doing COB events in the Spring and I don't see any information about an office for greek life on my school's webpage. I would like to know if upperclassmen count for quota.

Also, let us know how it goes krose. It can be really nervewracking to go through being a junior and everything so know you're not alone!!

I'll go out on a limb and say if you can't find a Greek life webpage, being a junior is not going to be a big issue.

VandalSquirrel 11-12-2010 06:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bronco (Post 2003287)
Theres a webpage. And we have a fraternity and sorority life office but I think it falls under student activities and theres no real contact information for the specific office.

I managed to find http://www.wmich.edu/greeks/staff.html by going to the Western Michigan page and putting Greek Life in the search and that was the first link listed. Oh look, names, email, phone numbers, office location. http://search.wmich.edu/search?q=greek+life&x=8&y=9 This link also appears on the Fraternity and Sorority Pages Contact Us http://www.wmich.edu/greeks/contact.html

Srsly.

Regina.George 11-12-2010 10:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bronco (Post 2003204)
Does every school have a greek life office to ask? I'm a junior doing COB events in the Spring and I don't see any information about an office for greek life on my school's webpage. I would like to know if upperclassmen count for quota.

COB has nothing to do with quota. There are no quotas in COB. Chapters can give bids up to total or average chapter size depending on the school. Being a junior does count. Every warm body that receives a bid counts into total.

Regina.George 11-13-2010 04:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bronco (Post 2003407)
Regina.George - so if the chapter average on campus is more than the total the chapters can take in more than total?

No. From what I understand, it will be one or the other as determined by the Greek life office/campus. From what I have observed, average size is used most often when almost all of the sororities on campus exceed total/total hasn't been re-set in a long time. These are things that are not under your control and you should not concern yourself with them. They don't provide any additional opportunities or loopholes for someone in your position. Generally they are attempts to help the chapters with lower numbers; they are not to help add even more members to healthy chapters.

VandalSquirrel 11-13-2010 08:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bronco (Post 2003407)
Okay is it necessary to be so rude? I said there was an office. And yeah I know there are contacts but there's no number for the specific fraternity and sorority life office itself which is what I was looking for. Follow your own links and youd see that it basically directs you to student activities. Oh and gives you the number/email for two advisers. I already tried emailing one of them and they didn't email me back. The address is the student activities office too. I thought 33girl meant an independent office or something.

Regina.George - so if the chapter average on campus is more than the total the chapters can take in more than total?

Obviously you have no idea what RUDE is but I guess acting helpless is the way to go here? That link I provided has the names of two separate people, including the advisor, with two different phone numbers from the main Student Activities number at the bottom of the page. What more do you want? Honestly, Kristin Fouts is the Assistant Director of Fraternity and Sorority Life and can be reached at 269-387-2131 and kfouts@wmich.edu and there is a Fraternity & Sorority Life Graduate Assistant who can be reached at SALP-GreekGA@wmich.edu and 269-387-2138. Their offices are listed as #223 Bernhard Center in Kalamazoo. What else do you need? If you really want to go Greek walk yourself to 223 Bernhard Center, or call them since your email wasn't answered. Rush ended almost two months ago and you need to be proactive if you really want to be Greek and take matters into your own hands, which may include going in person or actually doing some leg work. If you keep getting led back or thinking it is just the Student Activities Office, why aren't you asking them who to talk to or what to do?

Do you think anyone here is going to tell you any different than to go to the office, we have no special knowledge and really, a lot of people would have been a lot ruder or not given you the links. I gave you the benefit of the doubt of being unaware of navigating pursuit of membership, a mistaken act of generosity for sure.

AZTheta 11-13-2010 10:22 AM

VS, you were anything BUT rude.

Bronco, you are exhibiting "Fast Food Behavior/Mentality". You want it your way and you want it instantly. There's no drive-through lane for recruitment, however. University staff are overworked and stretched thin everywhere; the economy has impacted higher education just as much (if not more, in some instances) as every other profession. I work at a University. I know.

A polite and courteous request, coupled with patience, often is the best route to follow. Should you not get a response within a reasonable time (a week), then you either follow up with another email request, or you make a personal appearance.

Good luck to you.

33girl 11-13-2010 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bronco (Post 2003407)
I thought 33girl meant an independent office or something.

Webpage = office?
http://images.sodahead.com/polls/001..._3_xlarge.jpeg

VandalSquirrel 11-17-2010 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AzTheta (Post 2003424)
VS, you were anything BUT rude.

Bronco, you are exhibiting "Fast Food Behavior/Mentality". You want it your way and you want it instantly. There's no drive-through lane for recruitment, however. University staff are overworked and stretched thin everywhere; the economy has impacted higher education just as much (if not more, in some instances) as every other profession. I work at a University. I know.

A polite and courteous request, coupled with patience, often is the best route to follow. Should you not get a response within a reasonable time (a week), then you either follow up with another email request, or you make a personal appearance.

Good luck to you.

I'm cut from the cloth where if I want or need something I do it myself and would walk to the office in person instead of sending one email and decide Greek Chat was my next move. The majority of the time I prefer face to face contact as it is harder for someone to forget about your phone message or email if you are standing right there. It just confuses me that there are names, numbers, and a location and that isn't acceptable and we're going to have campus specific information if someone rubs the Greekchat genie bottle. No kids, we're more like a Magic 8 ball here, sometimes yes, sometimes no, and very often the answer is:

http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:c...e8Ball.jpg&t=1

I definitely see this as generational, as I've always had email but I don't find it to be the only way to communicate. But I'm SO RUDE I still practice the art of handwritten thank you notes and bring a local food gift if I stay at the home of someone outside my town.


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