very pissed off right now
 

I am not sure how to deal with the situation that has come up. I went through fall rush knowing a lot of girls excited because I knew this semester would be it. I attended every event and was super excited. I had to miss a day of rush due to class but according to my school you only have to attend the two other days to be eligible for a bid or invite. I went to pick up my invite and was told I was not eligible of which I KNOW i am. I checked my gpa and attended all the events I was told to. This has happened to at least five other girls I know had the same exact thing happen to them . Sorority Sisters are complaining to the Greek Life Office that this is a mistake But she just won't budge and told me I will have to COB i don't know what to do seeing as this isn't my mistake

I was just wondering how a girl who follows every rule to the tee be considered ineligible with no reason Behind it.

QFP.
It don't know what happened, but I can tell you this -- unless someone on GC works in the greek life office of your school, they don't know either. I'm sorry things didn't work out. :(
If you would've gotten a bid if there were no mix-up, then COBing should be a piece of cake, right?

How do you know that missing a day is OK? Is that in writing somewhere? And did you let them know you had class and would not be there?

our info sheet for pnm states that you have to attend 8 parties out of 12 and no offense My schoolwork came first I had a class that i could not cut. I always spoke with the director who said I would be fine. I find it ironic that a group such as sorority which promotes good grades, would be ok with me missing class to be at recruitment

You do not know what the sororities thought. You only know that you were deemed "ineligible." The only people who can tell you why is your GREEK LIFE OFFICE.

We don't know, we're not psychics. And neither are you. There's no grand conspiracy theory here to lie to you and then drop you, then tell all the Greeks on the internet.

http://img840.imageshack.us/img840/8...cqp0846128.gif
Or is there.

i dont mean to offend anyone I just am venting. I just felt that to randomly be dubbed ineligible out of no where with no explanation is strange.

OP - are you paying attention to what responses you are being given? We are not meanies and we are trying to provide you with some constructive directions.

Please go speak to the Office of Greek Life. Your explanation will come from there, specific to your situation and your school.

Without knowing your school and seeing all the paperwork that you're referring to, it is difficult (impossible) to be any more specific. And we are going on the limited information/explanation you've offered.

If you are at a school with NPC sororities, you weren't "randomly dubbed ineligible", I can assure you.

Ladies:

With all due respect I must disagree. My oldest daughter went through recruitment and gave notice one month prior that she had to miss one night of recruitment due to a class. She confirm with a copy of her schedule (official, not handwritten). It was first round. Her rho chis tried to double book her to a few houses. Only one house agreed and they didn't greet her so she stood in the entry hall.

She was dropped from every house that she wasn't able to see. This was first round so it wasn't like she had a record of meeting several girls and they weren't impressed. Her grades were outstanding and her ecs were as well.

There are rules, written and unwritten. And, as all you know I am a real proponent of Greek life. Being dropped for going to class happens. And, if you go to a very competitive school there isn't the opportunity to COB.

Yes but what the OP is saying is not that she was released from every chapter, but that she was ineligible to pledge. There is a difference.

/back to lane

ellebud, I agree that the scenario you paint is plausible and even likely, especially if a school uses RFM because if you have to cut someone and you have enough women that you DID meet to invite back. I can see collegians choosing not to take a risk and invite someone back who they didn't get to meet. That is different than what this poster seems to be saying.

It honestly sounds to me like the original poster may be confused about what she read because the "attending 8/12" sounds like a second round of parties in which the max number of chapters that could be attended would be 8. I can't imagine any campus saying that it's ok to only attend 8/12 first parties as a standard procedure. I can see them making exceptions due to class, but not actually putting a minimum number in writing. I've never seen a campus that said it was ok to NOT visit every chapter in the first round as a standard rule, even those with minimally structured recruitment.

As for these PNMs being told they are ineligible, I have to wonder if someone said that instead of saying "You were cut by all the chapters" because they just didn't know how to say that the women had no invitations.

All that said, I agree that the only way to clarify exactly what happened is for the original poster to talk to the Greek Life Office again.

You could be correct. Heck we could all be right. There are several possible scenarios here: from being dropped by houses because she went to class, to the OP not properly informing Panhel that she was going to class (which could have been to lack of due diligence to ambiguous rules to a very lazy Panhellenic) to the OP not undstanding what was going on.

Yes, ellebud (nodding head in agreement) - as I said earlier, we're going on the limited information the OP provided. We can go crazy speculating when we don't have all the facts.

I have the terrible feeling that you misunderstood your info sheet, and that your panhellenic did a bad job explaining the way recruitment works. What they probably meant was that you could attend up to 8 sororities out of 12 during that round of recruitment - you would attend all parties. It does not mean that it's optional for you to attend only some of the parties you are invited to, or that you can spread your party count across days - NPC policy is that you attend all parties you are invited to for each round. Some schools will drop you from recruitment if you skip parties, whereas at other schools those sororities whose parties you miss will usually just drop you because they didn't get to know you as well as the other PNMs.

Is this informal recruitment? What are the rules, exactly? Can you share - word for word - that the info states regarding the process of attending 8 out of 12 parties? It seems to me like you're misreading something.

Something's amiss.

Right which is why going to her GL office is the best place for her instead of posting here saying she knows exactly what the sororities were thinking (and were hypocritical too). If you're not asking the questions of the people who can answer them, then you don't really want the answers.

ETA: And if there are no answers, well then you do what you gotta do, you COB or rush again and move on.

Rho Chis can be idiots, too.

This sounds like the most plausible explanation yet. You can't just "pick" a day of parties to miss, if you were invited to parties on that day.

mynamegoes - did you have a Rho Chi, Rho Gamma or something else helping you? (I'm guessing/hoping not.)

Then I think you need to make an appointment to discuss your situation with the director you "always spoke with and who said it was fine." No one here can help you.

This. Did you tell the Greek Life office that you had a class during recruitment BEFORE you skipped parties? Attending every party that you are invited to is part of the process. If you miss a party, you are dropped from recruitment.

The sheet specifically stated that to be eligible a PNM must attend 8 out 12 parties. Also I did notify The Greek Life Officer prior to the beginning out recruitment that I had i class that I would not be able to miss. She said I was fine. I spoke with the Rho Chis and they said I would be ok. that's just where I was confused. Also I go to a small not so competitive school if that helps. I tried a few times after this happened to go to the Greek life coordinator but she keeps blowing me off and saying you can COB. I was willing to prove I attended the parties. Honestly, I would have rather been cut knowing no one wanted me rather than knowing there are people who could of wanted to invite me but couldn't because of this mistake

OP: could you clarify this, possibly?

First Round is usually open house or "ice water" parties. What does the "sheet" say in terms of attendance? And there are a total of 12 chapters to visit?

Second Round: Usually Philanthropy. Again, what does the sheet say? Maximum # of invites you can receive is ____?

Third round: House Tours/Skit. Maximum # of invites you can receive is _____?

Preference: What is the maximum # of invites?

And at what stage is it "optional" to attend 8/12 parties?

I'm wondering if you didn't attend all open house parties? Thinking out loud here...

Just trying to be helpful in piecing this out.

Didn't that already happen? Seems like your school keeps making "mistakes" and there are always extenuating circumstances with you. Just sayin'.....

Four chapters? What?

Dazed and confused...full moon rising.

And I guess, from reading her past posts, that this was informal recruitment? There shouldn't be restrictions on number of parties one has to attend in an informal recruitment - chapters basically decide for themselves what they want to do and extend bids to whomever they want.

And regardless of whose mistake it was, the fact is there is no going back and righting a wrong. If you want to join a sorority, I would look into COB. You can be annoyed or frustrated, but then you have to get over it and move on. If you express interest in COB and you are not invited to any parties, then your impression that there are chapters who are interested in you is mistaken.

If it's a structured informal recruitment, there may be times when rushees have to attend a certain number (i.e. they MUST go to all the Meet the Greeks or first round parties). There are lots of things between full out formal and wild wild west style COB.

As to the OP...I thought she sounded semi familar but was too lazy to check. Thanks, Barb.

Yes. Seems she has had a few problems with recruitment before.

Welcome to team Barbie. After the recent flow of bs stories from pnms "wronged" by sorority meanies, I don't believe any of their stories.

It makes me doubly question the authenticity when it appears that the PNM lacks the capacity to put together a coherent thought. I know I'm hopped up on antibiotics that are kicking my tail right now, but I can't even figure out half of what she's trying to say.

Bottom line: even if something unfair did happen, COB is your next option. Pursue that through the Greek Life office.

Try COB, but realize your stories aren't adding up to people on here - they might not add up to the people at your school either. Recruitment fail.

Ok i found out what happened and yes this did actually happen sorry if I am a bit all over the place but I am very very stressed.
Ok so our greek life coordinator made the COB list prior to the last day of required recruitment parties. So our attendance to that was not counted. You only needed to attend two but most girls attended 3 ( I had class for one). So yeah it sucks and is unfair but whatever.

This.Still.Does.Not.Make.Sense.Whatsoever.

That still doesn't explain how your school went from having 4 sororities to having 12. Did you transfer?? :confused:

Im sorry that my school has made a lot of mistakes in the Greek life department but that does not mean i am lying. Things happen that are shitty, I'm willing to COB but i do feel as the though the school should acknowledge the fact that many girls were unfairly cut from recruitment.

I said that there was 12 parties in all of 3 days from 4 different sororities not 12 groups