Blacklisted
 

Yesterday my friend was at some high up university meeting where a girl from XYZ and a boy from ABC were talking about how I am apparently blacklisted from every sorority on campus by the university I attend due to the fact I was interested in starting my own chapter here...which I realized I didn't want to do. What exactly is blacklisting...how do I get off...and is there really such thing as a blacklist?

YOUR own chapter? No wonder...

I don't think the university would try to "blacklist" you. Maybe the sororities didn't like that you tried to do that and don't want you to join, but there's no way the university is behind it.

Like bringing another chapter here of ABC or DEF or XYZ. I apologize for that error.

Terminology clarification: I think you are talking about "expansion" and there are threads on GC that address the expansion idea and process. In short: it's not easy and is far more complicated than many (most) people realize.

Blacklisting? Seems extreme and I don't see that the university would be participating in whatever it is that you're experiencing. However, if you were vocal about how all the existing sororities/fraternities s**k, I can understand why you might not be on anyone's "wish list" of PNMs.

The sororities on campus do not work in tandem with membership selection, except to the extent that recruitment for all of them happens at the same time. So you wouldn't be universally black-listed in any sort of official way, but if it is a small campus and you made a big enough broohaha over expansion when it wasn't part of the existing NPC plan, each group may have negative feelings for you.

If you go to a bigger school, I kind of doubt you could do anything that could make a big enough impact for 10 or 15 sororities to know and dislike you.

1. Why would the university have anything to do with it?

2. Why would a guy from a fraternity be at this meeting?

Sounds to me like the meeting was for something else, like maybe student senate, and the others 2 were talking beforehand, or afterwards, if at all.

1) Because since she already didn't understand enough of the process to use the correct terminology, she doesn't understand that the university itself has no say in any blacklisting.
2) Because it was a meeting about something else and she just came up in the conversation? At least that's how it sounded to me.

Why do I feel like I walked in on the middle of a conversation and missed the first part?

So first you failed to receive any invites back after the first day of recruitment and blamed a "horrible rumor." And it had nothing to do with your shitty GPA, junior status or sparkling personality. Now you're blaming the fact that you wanted to lead an expansion effort.

It's time to look inward. Sorority life isn't in the cards for you and it has nothing to do with horrible rumors, your desire for expansion, imagined "blacklisting" or any other external reasons.

Jesus, harsh much? Do you KNOW there is a shitty GPA involved? Whether or not I believe it, it is possible to be dropped due to rumors.

OP, it is doubtful to everyone here as you can see that there is any sort of actual list. If this bit of conversation was repeated to you correctly, it probably means that you have somehow pissed off sororities on campus and the people discussing the situation think you won't get a bid. I'm sure you can still go through recruitment if you'd like but since there is obviously some sort of issue be aware of that.

Are you really that special that you can't figure out how to look at a person's other posts?

Twice this girl has come here to blame sororities for her inability to get a bid. First it was a "terrible rumor" and now she's "black listed." I am sick of people coming here and telling tales that perpetuate stereotypes like this. It's clear that this poster is that girl. Every campus has at least one of them. She needs to stop blaming others and coming to a public board to moan about it.

This is the poor gpa. I'm sorry, OP that you've been "blacklisted" but in my experience there isn't a "list" it just means for one reason or another, most sororities wouldn't give you a bid. I had a friend who was "blacklisted" because she de-pledged 3 sororities. I don't know what the circumstances are, but if you go through recruitment it's likely that a GPA under 3.0-3.5 depending on the school will give you a bid. Sorry if that's harsh, but GPA is usually a huge factor.

I am very special. My mommy tells me that every day. She also reminds me not to be rude. :D

There. Fixed it for you. Now you mommy can be proud. :D

Let me put it this way...worrying about PNMs saying silly things about Greek life is moot when the standard is to be bitchy to them, even if it's on the internet. IMO, that reflects badly on sorority women.

But feel free to continue to be snide to me, I'm not a PNM. :D

And now yours can, too!

Teehee.

Oooooh ...... aren't you so cool to make fun of any obvious typo made on a tiny phone keyboard. Hope that made your day! :D

Well, if it was good enough for you to do for Alumiyum, it was certainly good enough for me to do for you!

Pointing out someone's tiresome personality is hardly the same as pointing out a typo. I guess you're kind of special too. :D

*clutches at pearls* Oh no. Not that! Not.. BAD REFLECTIONS!

Seriously, you jumped on BR for being an OMGMEANIE and she pwned you when it turned out she knew what she was talking about. So stop retreating behind the "bad example" standard and take your lumps.

Or go have a pity party with carnation about what things are coming to these days and how we're destroying PNMs lives. Whichever one makes you more likely to stop your whinging*


*real word, before Titchou tries to grammar check me.

Nope...not any moreso than anyone else. God loves us all equally....I'm OK with that.

Her reasoning for clawing the eyes out of the OP was that posters/PNMs like that make Greek life look bad. I honestly believe sorority women being rude to PNMs, especially when there isn't prior provocation (hey, everyone has a limit), is a much more legit concern. Standing by my response, no pity party needed.

I love it when you get all British on us!!

Nope, she was telling the girl to stop blaming others for her problems. That's quite logical. You, on the other hand, are trying to moderate BR's behavior on behalf of sorority women everywhere. That's quite stupid.

This PNM does fit the mold of "I want to be in a sorority but can't OMG THEY'RE MEAN AND DID MEAN THINGS TO ME SORORITY WOMEN SUCK." Even if she hasn't gotten to the caps lock stage yet. If she's made up her mind, I'm hardly going to try to change it back by saying "oh so sorry your campus sorority women are meanies." :rolleyes:

I am referring to this, "Twice this girl has come here to blame sororities for her inability to get a bid. First it was a "terrible rumor" and now she's "black listed." I am sick of people coming here and telling tales that perpetuate stereotypes like this."

I'm trying to do nothing, just pointing out if she's that worried about stereotypes being rude isn't going to help things. And your attempt at moderating me isn't going to help. I stand by what I said, fail to see what the big deal is, done. I'm confident Barbie isn't crying herself to sleep over my post.

If what she said is true, do you think it's appropriate that this sorority woman was speaking about this out in the open with a fraternity member?

Personally I don't. I think it's bad form. But I'm sure whether or not it would have an effect depends on the campus.

I find the whole situation to be fiction. A "friend" overheard two people at a meeting discussing this. It isn't even first hand, and looks to me like a set up for how horrible and mean sorority women and the Greek system are.

I do not concur with my sister that our posting online is a bad example for sorority women, I find people entertaining dramarama fake postings to be a bigger issue. This poster may not even be a real person and with the other posts Barbie thankfully mined for us, if this is a real situation, there are a lot of reasons this person may not successfully receive a bid, and start projecting or making stuff up for sympathy or ego protection.

I have never said posting online is a bad example (and obviously don't think that), I simply pointed out that if stereotypes via PNMs are rubbing sorority women the wrong way, being rude to PNMs isn't a good method of debunking said stereotypes.

That's why I asked IF it was true.

Seriously?

Allow me to make this clear: You can do what you like, I'm calling you stupid for doing it. Telling an individual that s/he is stupid is not the same thing as trying to the "making us look bad" pablum you're trying to get us to swallow.

Trying to flip my word usage around on me when they're two different things just highlights the stupidity. As does conflating the concept of "calling you out" with it being a "big deal."

Sorry, posting online rudely.

I think rude is a very subjective term. If we tell someone something they don't want to hear, for example when they ask a question that is common, we tell them to search or it isn't something we discuss, no they can't join another NPC once they initiated; that isn't rude in my opinion, that's just someone who isn't happy with reality.

I know I am perceived as rude because I am tired of the whiny, give it to me, I can't bother to research it myself, entitlement culture and helicopter parenting on this site and in higher education. For kids who grew up using the internet a lot of them have very thin skins. Furthermore, this site is open to view, so it isn't a huge secret of our culture and style. No one here is going to post and get a huge surprise, unless they are incapable of reading ahead of time and using the search function.

You're right, you said it "Reflects badly." Those are soooooooooooooo different. In fact reflecting badly is probably worse at is suggests her actions have tainted others, rather than just being one singular example of badness.

But you ask really stupid questions so I'm not sure why you expected an answer.

/pineapple

Ok allow me to make this clear:

Barbie complained that certain PNMs perpetuate negative stereotypes about Greek life. Barbie was very rude to this particular PNM. I pointed out that if she is worried about PNMs perpetuating negative stereotypes, responding to them in a rude manner will only feed the negativity.

I don't care what you or anyone else swallows, but I posted what I think.

*Head on desk*

There is a difference between telling someone to use the search function and being a complete cow because said poster didn't use it in the first place.

Ok people, nothing else to see here. It doesn't matter how many circles we all run in no one here is going to change their minds.

She responded just to not respond, I didn't expect anything from her. You mean it's really stupid in the sense that obviously this isn't appropriate for a sorority woman to do?

FYP. :D