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-   -   Daughter Going Through Rush at UT Knoxville (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=106337)

Morton 07-17-2009 04:49 PM

Daughter Going Through Rush at UT Knoxville
 
New to the community... I am a Chi Omega from Austin Peay State University. My daughter is heading to UT Knoxville, which will be a MUCH bigger rush experience.

I have managed to secure RIF's for most of the sorority's which she is interested.

I have looked at all of their websites, but really cannot garner much about the groups. Are any of you UT graduates that can give me some insight into what her rush experience will be like?

She is a 4.0 from a private prep school in Nashville, 31 ACT, varsity athletics, leadership in school, etc... Will she just be another number at UT?

Thanks for any insight. Just trying to prepare myself on how to support her through the process.

FSUZeta 07-17-2009 05:08 PM

just be there for her and listen to what she has to say should she have the opportunity to phone you during her rush week. Be excited for her should she receive a bid and send flowers and/or buy some cute sorority gifts-even if it is a different group than your own. be supportive no matter what, and should the unthinkable happen and she does not receive her first choice, or even worse, does not receive a bid, let her cry on your shoulder-even if it is over the phone, then point out some other opportunities available to her on campus. best wishes that she does get her first choice!!

it is tough on the pnms, but it is certainly tough on us mom's too. be sure to use a support system for yourself. and please let us know how everything goes.

Gusteau 07-17-2009 05:09 PM

You might be interested in this thread (http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...d.php?t=97152&) about UT Knoxville recruitment. This was the first thread I found in a quick search so you might be able to find more. From the looks of that thread recs are very important so you might want to try to get them for all of the sororities and not the just the one's she's interested in. Hope this helps!

ComradesTrue 07-17-2009 05:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morton (Post 1826722)
I have managed to secure RIF's for most of the sorority's which she is interested.

Secure recs for *all* groups. Every single one of them.

First, her mind could change during the recruitment process.

Second, the groups that she is interested may not be interested in her. That may sound harsh, but better to be prepared and have options to fall back on.

Finally, I concur with FSUZeta. She has given some great advice.

OleMissGlitter 07-17-2009 05:13 PM

Yes she will be just another number at Tennessee. I hate to say that but TN has a very competitive Greek system. I would tell her to go through with a smile on her face and to not have her heart set on one group. If she goes through with an open mind she'll end up having a better experience. I'm sure she'll be fine but she needs to go with the flow. I would tell her not to rely on her legacy status either. In the SEC that doesn't always mean you have an automatic bid. TN has very strong chapters so I'm sure she'll find her home!

violetpretty 07-17-2009 11:43 PM

I believe Chi Omega is a very competitive chapter at an already competitive school, and I imagine she may be one of MANY legacies at Tennessee. Mentally prepare yourselves for the possibility that she may be released, because there are no guarantees with legacy status.

KSUViolet06 07-18-2009 02:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morton (Post 1826722)
New to the community... I am a Chi Omega from Austin Peay State University. My daughter is heading to UT Knoxville, which will be a MUCH bigger rush experience.

I have managed to secure RIF's for most of the sorority's which she is interested.

I have looked at all of their websites, but really cannot garner much about the groups. Are any of you UT graduates that can give me some insight into what her rush experience will be like?

She is a 4.0 from a private prep school in Nashville, 31 ACT, varsity athletics, leadership in school, etc... Will she just be another number at UT?

Thanks for any insight. Just trying to prepare myself on how to support her through the process.


UT has a pretty competitive recruitment.

Yes, your daughter seems to have some pretty impressive stats.

However, at Tennessee, you can expect that there will be MANY GIRLS JUST LIKE HER. That makes for a pretty competitive environment.

Keep in mind that the chapters that she is most interested in may choose not to invite her back for whatever reason (because there are alot of great women going through and they really can't keep everyone).

Because of that, it's important for her to remain open minded about all chapters, and not get her heart set on just a few.

Also very important: Yes, she is a Chi O legacy, but keep in mind that she is probably not the ONLY one in recruitment. So do not assume that she has an automatic bid to Chi O. That's not always the case at larger schools. Legacies can and do get released.

No one can really say what her rush will end up like, but I can tell you that there are many impressive women at UT. So there are no guarantees that everything will go perfectly.

As a parent, the best thing for you to do is be supportive. If she does get a bid, be happy for her (whether it is your sorority, her 1st choice, her 2nd choice, whatever). If she doesn't, just be there for her and encourage her to get involved in other stuff and enjoy her time at school.


ASTalumna06 07-18-2009 03:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morton (Post 1826722)
New to the community... I am a Chi Omega from Austin Peay State University. My daughter is heading to UT Knoxville, which will be a MUCH bigger rush experience.

I have managed to secure RIF's for most of the sorority's which she is interested.

I have looked at all of their websites, but really cannot garner much about the groups. Are any of you UT graduates that can give me some insight into what her rush experience will be like?

She is a 4.0 from a private prep school in Nashville, 31 ACT, varsity athletics, leadership in school, etc... Will she just be another number at UT?

Thanks for any insight. Just trying to prepare myself on how to support her through the process.

Websites aren't TRULY going to give you an idea of what each sorority is like at UT. They're all going to give you pretty much the same information... the basics. They're not going to tell you the personality of the chapter or what the members are like. That's something that your daughter is going to have to figure out for herself during recruitment.

No one here can really map out her experience. Everyone's is different. All we can say is that it will be competitive and she should be aware of that. Having her heart set on just a few groups before she gets to school won't help her in the long run.

This hasn't been said yet, and I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but... Once your daughter leaves for school, take a giant step back. You've helped her, and that's great. But she's going to college and once she's there, you can't watch over her shoulder.

The only advice you can and should give her is to keep an open mind, be herself, put her best foot forward, and enjoy the experience. And if she has questions/concerns/tears of sorrow/tears of joy, and she feels like she needs to share her experience with you, she will.

Good luck to your daughter and hopefully she finds exactly where she's meant to be... whether that be in a sorority or elsewhere :)

sassygal 07-18-2009 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morton (Post 1826722)
New to the community... I am a Chi Omega from Austin Peay State University. My daughter is heading to UT Knoxville, which will be a MUCH bigger rush experience.

I have managed to secure RIF's for most of the sorority's which she is interested.

I have looked at all of their websites, but really cannot garner much about the groups. Are any of you UT graduates that can give me some insight into what her rush experience will be like?

She is a 4.0 from a private prep school in Nashville, 31 ACT, varsity athletics, leadership in school, etc... Will she just be another number at UT?

Thanks for any insight. Just trying to prepare myself on how to support her through the process.

You have gotten some good advice on this forum. The only thing I wanted to add was that it appears that the first round of parties are short rounds 15 minutes. Unfortunately, this means first impressions will go a LONG way. The ones going through recruitment that really get noticed this day are the ones who "light up a room" when they walk in. The girls who are shy have a much harder time.

Good luck to your daughter and you should also keep an open mind. Hopefully, she will have a perfect recruitment, but keep in mind that I have seen a lot of really great girls get released through the process. You just never know and there are no guarantees.

BlueCarnation 07-19-2009 11:32 PM

Does she know any other girls who have been through the process there she can talk to? That might help both of you. And definitely do get recs for every house--she may think she's only interested in certain ones, but may come to find that she really likes some others. Just tell her to be herself, be positive, and not try too hard. Good luck to her!

NutBrnHair 07-20-2009 09:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by violetpretty (Post 1826793)
I believe Chi Omega is a very competitive chapter at an already competitive school, and I imagine she may be one of MANY legacies at Tennessee. Mentally prepare yourselves for the possibility that she may be released, because there are no guarantees with legacy status.

You are correct.

PJS 07-20-2009 11:23 AM

Yes, yes and yes to all of the above posters.

I was in your shoes a couple years ago. My daughter had a similar HS resume. She is also an exceptionally positive, optimistic person. I was outwardly not assuming anything, but inwardly wasn't worried at all. As another alum told me, "You can't possibly believe that [our] house could cut her, do you?"

Sure enough, my own chapter cut her. I was stunned. The other greek alums in our community were stunned. She pledged somewhere else, ended up loving her greek experience, and life goes on.

What you have to remember is this: chapter recruitment decisions are made by 19-21 year old young women. It is an imperfect process. When my daughter called absolutely devastated after being let go by my house, she said, "Mom, they didn't like me!!" To which I replied, "Honey, they didn't KNOW you." She felt very personally rejected because it obviously wasn't due to a lack in her activities/grades/references etc.

One of my favorite threads is the Recruitment sticky on "You'll end up where you were meant to. . . " Sometimes the system works the way you think it should, and sometimes, frankly, it is very capricious and arbitrary.

To this I would also add: legacies are often not given the same deference that they were 25+ years ago when I was in school. As many on these boards will tell you, often enough legacies go through these days to fill a pledge class. Chapters cannot possibly take them all. Legacies often get an automatic invite to the second party, and that is the extent of the additional consideration.

You are right to be mentally prepared for any possibility before recruitment. Now, after giving you the worst case scenarios, you are to be congratulated on raising an accomplished daughter that has an excellent resume. Yes, many others at UT will also have strong credentials, but hers will be among the best. There is no reason to think that she won't have a very successful recruitment, whether that ends in her affiliation with Chi O, another chapter, or the decision not to affiliate at all. Good luck to both of you. (It is a much more intense week as a mom than I ever thought it would be!!) I hope you follow up and let us know how it turns out for both of you!:)

gee_ess 07-20-2009 11:30 AM

Kudos to PJS. Very good comments and advice!


(although I do take exception to your TJ quote! I would probably argue that federal regulations put on banks are the evils TJ would be speaking of today :) )

33girl 07-20-2009 11:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PJS (Post 1827225)
it is very capricious and arbitrary.

Thanks Cosmo Kramer. ;) LOL

Also, UT and APSU are two very different institutions. Just as you should be prepared for your sorority to possibly not bid her, be prepared that she may not like your sorority, or may decide Greek life isn't for her at all. If this is her decision, take it with good grace. (I know you know all this on an intellectual level, but I think it bears repeating.)

Fleur de Lis 07-20-2009 12:17 PM

There are plenty of Nashville girls at UT, so have her contact active sorority women she knows who go to UT. This may give her some tips on UT recruitment and hopefully people in the houses to pull for her!

FSUZeta 07-20-2009 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fleur de Lis (Post 1827239)
There are plenty of Nashville girls at UT, so have her contact active sorority women she knows who go to UT. This may give her some tips on UT recruitment and hopefully people in the houses to pull for her!

actually, contacting them now is not the thing to do. i would imagine that the sororities are in their "non-contact" phase, and contacting them might result in the sorority incurring a recruitment infraction and dire consequences for your daughter.

Elephant Walk 07-20-2009 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 (Post 1826816)
Also very important: Yes, she is a Chi O legacy, but keep in mind that she is probably not the ONLY one in recruitment. So do not assume that she has an automatic bid to Chi O. That's not always the case at larger schools. Legacies can and do get released.

A thing to consider... (and I'm not terribly sure if sororities do the same things that fraternities do)..

Your legacy does not matter one single bit because you are not a legacy of that chapter. I may be speaking out of turn and some other lady can correct me, but priority (in fraternity rush) is certainly given to girls from said chapter, rather than the national sorority.

Again, I could be wrong.

irishpipes 07-20-2009 01:44 PM

EW - it's not the same for sororities.

ASTalumna06 07-20-2009 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl (Post 1827230)
Thanks Cosmo Kramer. ;) LOL

Exactly what I was thinking :)

KSUViolet06 07-20-2009 04:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elephant Walk (Post 1827265)
A thing to consider... (and I'm not terribly sure if sororities do the same things that fraternities do)..

Your legacy does not matter one single bit because you are not a legacy of that chapter. I may be speaking out of turn and some other lady can correct me, but priority (in fraternity rush) is certainly given to girls from said chapter, rather than the national sorority.

Again, I could be wrong.

It's not the same with sorority recruitment AT ALL. Not even a CHAPTER legacy is guaranteed a spot.

You can look back through some of the SEC school recruitment threads and see that. There are plenty of moms from Bama/UGA/etc. who were lamenting about their daughter being cut from not only mom's sorority, but mom's chapter. Some of the girls even had bio sisters who were actives.

So it definitely doesn't guarantee you anything, especially when some chapters have multiple chapter legacies in recruitment. They can't take all of them--and they don't. It's tough being a girl, lol.

violetpretty 07-20-2009 09:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elephant Walk (Post 1827265)
A thing to consider... (and I'm not terribly sure if sororities do the same things that fraternities do)..

Your legacy does not matter one single bit because you are not a legacy of that chapter. I may be speaking out of turn and some other lady can correct me, but priority (in fraternity rush) is certainly given to girls from said chapter, rather than the national sorority.

Again, I could be wrong.

Every NPC has a different policy, and I imagine each chapter can tailor it to their needs (i.e. if there are so many legacies to a competitive chapter can't reasonably invite them). There are so many factors that could influence a decision:
-How active the alumna is
-Type of relationship (i.e. in house sister vs step sister)
-How many relatives in the sorority the legacy has
and of course...
-The legacy's own merits

It's all very subjective, but as a general rule, legacies are [supposed to be] afforded "careful consideration".

Morton 07-24-2009 11:10 AM

Thanks to all for your words of wisdom and advice. She does have friends that are greek at UT, but none of which are Chi O's. I want her to have a great sisterhood and/or experience regardless of the sorority. Of course, I'd love for her to be my sister, but I would rather she be with a group that is the right fit for her.

I especially liked the advice about letting her go. Geez... it sure is hard:-)

Thanks again to everyone.

ZetaBeta 07-24-2009 01:11 PM

Good luck to your daughter! I was in the same situation last year. This year my daughter will be on the "other side" of rush at UTK. We had a long talk yesterday about how it had all transpired. Like your daughter, mine was a legacy. However, she cut it after the first round. She didn't want to lead them on....I see now that was the best option. Can't say it didn't hurt at the time, but it was her life and her rush. UT has 13 wonderful sororties. Your daughter will find the one that fits. My daughter has been extremely pleased with her choice. But, she did say that she would have been happy at any of the three she attended for pref. Good luck, be supportive and most importantly, listen. Don't give opinions, just be there when she needs to vent. It's a stressful week, but well worth it!

KSUViolet06 07-24-2009 01:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ZetaBeta (Post 1828639)
Can't say it didn't hurt at the time, but it was her life and her rush.

YES.

If more parents understood this, the world would be a happy place.

There would also be happier moms and daughters at the end of recruitment.

And fewer heli-moms on GC.

What was the best fit for you (however many years ago), MAY NOT be the best fit for your daughter (who is many years younger than you and a completely different person).

You should write a book.


Morton 07-24-2009 02:48 PM

Thanks Zeta Beta. Glad to know your daughter is happy! I'll let you know how it goes in three weeks:-)

PhiMuTN 07-28-2009 10:59 AM

Keep in mind that her numbers are good, but personality is important too. Make sure she really puts herself out there and shows each sorority who she really is. That will guide her to a sorority where she fits in the best!

tennesseemom 08-08-2009 03:06 PM

Tennessee recruitement is very competitive, but very organized with their rush. Make sure your daughter has a rec from every house, because many will cut the first night if they don't have a rec! This year there are over 1000 rushee's; which is higher than last year. there are several strong chapters- and I am sure your daughter can find a home. As some previous posters have said- legacies dont always guarentee a bid- Chi O for instance has so many legacys from the state of tennessee it would be impossible to give every legacy a bid! Good luck..keep us posted!

formerlurker 08-08-2009 11:31 PM

What Tennesseemom said is 100% correct. Tennessee recruitment is very competitive. Many chapters- including Chi O- have more legacies than spots, so some legacies will be cut. Your daughter has good numbers (but so will many, many others) but if she has an open mind and maximizes her options she should have a happy result. The girls who set their sights on the 3 or 4 most desired chapters are the ones who are often disappointed and drop out. Tell her to ignore the talk among the rushees and follow her own instincts- all chapters at UT are strong and all have very large and active and happy memberships- good luck to your daughter! Keep us posted!

tennesseemom 08-15-2009 05:48 PM

any news from the first day at UT knoxville's rush? Fill us in- we're dying to know the favorites!:)

volmom 08-15-2009 10:18 PM

Actually, first round "Go Greek" begins Sunday. I understand there is a lot of excitement in the air.

I also hear that numbers are down this year.

UTKALUM 08-17-2009 10:30 AM

Numbers were down. Not sure where the "over 1000" number came from but I don't think there were even 800 registered. The last time I heard which was the beginning of last week, we were around the 700 mark.

ZetaBeta 08-17-2009 11:23 AM

What I overheard this weekend is that they were down 200 hundred girls from last year. However, girls were still registering as of Friday.

Silverblue 08-17-2009 08:55 PM

I wonder if the economy has anything to do with this.

tennesseemom 08-17-2009 10:09 PM

numbers at Tennessee, Alabama and Auburn were all down this year- economy is probably to blame. Hopefully not as many rushees will drop and quota will hang in there around 50-55 for UT! Go Greek ends tonight- any feedback from rushees or moms out there?

puglover 08-17-2009 10:30 PM

Hope that all the girls starting their recruitment at UT Knoxville have a wonderful recruitment experience this week!

NutBrnHair 08-20-2009 01:07 PM

No updates yet??

exlurker 08-20-2009 05:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tennesseemom (Post 1836671)
numbers at Tennessee, Alabama and Auburn were all down this year- economy is probably to blame. Hopefully not as many rushees will drop and quota will hang in there around 50-55 for UT! Go Greek ends tonight- any feedback from rushees or moms out there?

About the economy: a recent article says that potential new members (and others) are expressing concerns about costs -- the article's about Iowa, but I wouldn't be surprised if most universities are seeing the same thing.

http://www.dailyiowan.com/2009/08/20/Metro/12339.html

On the other hand, the following article about the U of South Carolina indicates that the econbomy doesn't seem to be a deterrent there:

http://media.www.dailygamecock.com/m...-3755475.shtml

exlurker 08-21-2009 05:55 PM

Update: More on Recruitment Numbers at Tennessee

A very recent article dealing with the decline in recruitment (and enrollment) numbers at Tennessee:

http://dailybeacon.utk.edu/showartic...rticleid=55276

Silverblue 08-21-2009 05:57 PM

It'll be interesting to hear what quota is.

UTKALUM 08-22-2009 12:21 PM

Quota is being suggested between 40 and 42 but they may have dropped after the end of skit round last night. Tonight is pref and bids go out tomorrow.


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