Recommendations
 

Hi Chatters. I have a question with a disclaimer :)

I am a first generation collegian who is trying to take in all of your advise to be as well prepared for rush in the fall as possible. I've been told recs are basically essential with UCF being fairly competitive and my being a sophomore in the fall. However, I literally have NO greek connections. I've checked with family, friends families, and high school teachers. There is NO ONE.

After realizing this I took to ADPiUCF's thread that had GreekChatters listed by sorority who would be willing to write informational recs or help make connections with alum. associations in my area. I've tried going through the list and have contacted some.. however I have realized many of them are no longer active, and some women are upset about being contacted by someone they don't know.

Therefore I am hoping any women who would be willing to help me whether in writing an informational rec or making a connection would PM me or reply. I am willing to put in any amount of time you would like in order to make this work through emails, phone calls, or personal meetings if able. And I DO have a social resume ready.

I truly hope I do not offend anyone. I am not trying to be disrespectful or ruin the prestige you hold for your chapter. I would just like to be offer the most of myself I am to these chapters as they will be doing for me in the fall. I am not seeking specific chapter help, any represented at UCF (listed below) are helpful. I want to find my true home and therefore will shun no one. Again I am sorry if this bothers you, and if it bothers anyone to the point of needing to be pulled down I will do so. Thank you to all who have read. :D

Sororities at UCF
Alpha Delta Pi
Alpha Epsilon Phi
Alpha Xi Delta
Chi Omega
Delta Delta Delta
Kappa Alpha Theta
Kappa Delta
Kappa Kappa Gamma
Pi Beta Phi
Zeta Tau Alpha

Check out the Orlando Panhellenic association at http://winterpark-orlando.tripod.com...icassociation/.

Their Secretary/Recruitment or their College Nights coordinator will likely have contacts in your area to help you with recommendations.

Have you tried contacting your local Alumna Panhellenic? (My sister is currently going through the same process as you, so I feel your pain. Granted, she has some Greek family members to help her out... ) This is your best bet.

I have been trying to contact alum. associations. However with everything being online all you see is a list of names, and being non greek im not sure which titles are in charge of what. That's more what I'm hoping to find, a more specific point in the right direction. Thank you all. :)

Again, thank you so much! This is all really helpful :)

Can I hop in with a related question? I plan on going through formal recruitment this fall and have diligently been looking for people who can help me find alumnae willing to write recommendations for me. Like the OP I have virtually no connections and am having a lot of trouble. I contacted my local alumnae organization but never heard back; the only listed contact for anyone there is e-mail.

By mid-May, if I was still having no luck, I had planned to go through the list of GCers who are listed as willing to help with recs, find one recently active poster among each group I needed help with, and ask that person for help finding a contact. As I understand,, this is what the OP did and she mentioned that some people were upset at being contacted.

Is it not considered okay even to contact those who are listed, if I run out of options? If so, do you have any recommendations if my local group doesn't ever reply to attempts to contact them? Is it okay to go to the next closest alumnae group and ask for help?

I would try to contact the next closest alum group before going through the GC list.

That GC list, to my knowledge has not been updated in a long time -- and someone who might be considered an "active poster" may have changed their feelings about being asked to write recs for someone they don't know. Some may help point you in the right direction. Or some may give you a response you won't want to hear. Be prepared for the latter just in case.

ETA: I'd like to point out to all GCers that this thread should either be updated. If you want your name edited to add something or even removed from the list, now's probably a good time to let one of the mods know. It'd save PNMs soliciting for recs from getting a disappointing answer when they don't know better. A lot of the names I see on that list have not posted on GC for a while.

If it were up to me, that list would be gone. My personal feeling is that PNMs shouldn't be shopping for rec writers on GC anyway. It's one thing to point them in the right direction, but how can you write a rec for someone you don't know? And PNMs, how do you know that you can trust someone on GC? What if they write you a no-rec? It's a big risk.

Check your local newspaper. Mine regularly lists meetings (along with contact numbers) for our area Panhellenic Alumnae Association and many individual sorority alumnae associations as well.

Also, keep searching among the people whom you already know. If you've already tried all of your female teachers, try your guidance counselor, school nurse, etc. Ask your male teachers if their wives were sorority members. Try to extend the range of people whom you can contact.

another possible source would be girls you know from high school who you are friends with and who have joined sororities.

also, don't give up on recruitment even if you don't secure any recs. it may limit your options, and it may not work out at all, but then again, it may.

You could also contact the headquarters for the sororities at your school, and ask for contact information for sponsorship chairmen in your area.

I know me saying thank you is getting repetitive, but again, thanks. There are a lot of great people on this forum who have gave a lot of great private or public advise. I truly have no connections except three friends who have rushed. They are all in seperate chapters but I thought alum. recs would carry more weight. I am contacting more local alum associations.

instead of thinking conventionally, try thinking outside the box.

instead of thinking,"my friends in sororities might write a rec. for me, but i think that recs. from alums. hold more weight," ask your friends to write one for you. I don't know that an alumna rec. is held in higher regard than a collegiate one, but even if it is, isn't a collegiate rec. better than no recs. at all? if your friends sororities do not allow collegians to write recs., ask them to introduce you to one of their chapter advisors. those women might be willing to meet with you and get to know you well enough to feel comfortable to write a rec. for you.

should you meet with any of these alumnae, have a nice-looking, well-prepared resume' that you can give to them. dress nicely and treat this as if you were interviewing for a job.

Exactly, even if someone isn't Greek, he/she may know of Greek women. Even if you just just one Greek, even if it's a fraternity man or a sorority woman whose sorority does not have a chapter at UCF, chances are VERY good that they will know of others.

I say this every time a PNM is getting discouraged looking for recs, and I'll say it again. I am from a small town of 6,000 people in rural Maryland, which is not the cultural South (always a topic up for debate, but it's not Southern when it comes to Greeks). My high school graduating class was about 160. If a PNM came asking me for recs, I could connect her with alumnae and /or collegiates from 20 of the 26 NPCs, and this does NOT include people I know from UMD, only people who live in my town and/or graduated from my high school. I actually started a facebook group for all of the Greeks from my town for this purpose.

Keep trying. What about friends who are already in college? They stand a good chance of at least knowing a Greek. Think about how many people you really know.

Oh, I didnt mean to mislead, my friends ARE writing the recommendations, and I'm supposed to go meet with two of their houses. I didn't think to ask about meeting with their advisors. That is a great idea.

I know everyone keeps saying explore every option, and I haven't wanted to sound rude because I know I am asking for help. BUT TRUST ME I have explored EVERY option. All of my direct family liteally lives on farms. Most didnt graduate high much less college, and have NO collegiate connections. I am literally the first collegiate in my entire lineage except one distant cousin who didn't rush.

My teachers and high school councelor didnt either, and my councelor whom I still speak with regularly (and went to UF) said she didn't keep in contact with her friends who rushed and didn't know of any other councelors who rushed.

I have anyone I truly consider a friend about there family background. I have one friend whos mom was a DZ and I was going to meet with her through the week while her daughter is home to see if she had any connections. There may be people in my graduating class who had family, but if i don't know that person it wouldn't be any better than having an alum from an asociation write a informational rec.

I am still waiting to hear from some associations. I'm guessing they meet monthly or weekly?? But, I am prepared. I speak well to others and was a Future Business Leader in high school, therefore I feel very comfortable in interview settings. I also made a social resume using what ADPiUCF suggested on her rec. thread.

I just want everyone to know I am using common sense, and the advice Ive seen on this thread and MANY others. I just have a goal of two recs per chapter because I want to be my best. Im not looking for an easy way. Even those who would write informational recs, I would love to meet with.

Now that Ive wrote a novel.... Thanks again!!

I've said this before, and it works better for freshmen, but I've seen church bulletins used. Most houses of worship list the high school graduates, and where they're going to college - it's a great time to ask the church/temple secretary to add "Mary Smith - UCF - needs sorority recommendations, can anyone help?"

Trust me, no one wants you to succeed like your fellow parishoners! Maybe you could get listed with this year's class, or even as a special announcement.

I'd venture to say that NONE meet weekly. The chapters in the Greater Baltimore Alumnae Panhellenic include Alpha Omicron Pi, Phi Mu, Kappa Delta, Kappa Kappa Gamma, Gamma Phi Beta, Delta Gamma, Alpha Xi Delta, Phi Sigma Sigma, Sigma Kappa, Alpha Gamma Delta off the top of my head plus many more I can't remember. At our recent scholarship banquet, each chapter described their activities. Not a single one met more than monthly. I think it would be really hard to get alumnae together more frequently than that.

Why not ask your collegiate sorority friends who they had write their recs? Maybe they can arrange introductions.

I have one connection through one girl, but the others had no recs.

I figured there weren't very frequent meetings, but do the people that hold the college chairs typically check their emails more frequently? I would guess they do, but I really have no clue.

Things are turning out well though. I have talked to one alum. association now and my friends mom is going to flip through the rolex! :) YAY

I think you mean rolodex? Otherwise those watches must have some database.

Haha YESSSS! that is what I meant :D

I am going to echo what the others have already said! Ask, Ask, Ask!!!!!

I found out after I graduated that many of my friend's mothers were members of sororities!!! At my graduation party, I had some Theta stuff out and one of them stopped by and was like "Oh you are a Theta! I had so many Theta friends in college when I was an AChiO!" While I love Theta, and it was the place for me, the story serves as a lesson to always ask!!!

The picture should be a small one - wallet size of her senior picture is perfect. I would include the HS sorority on the resume. Some groups require the local rec person to sign a form and she may find this out when she checks on your daughter and they will wonder why it wasn't included.

Pictures
 

If possible, we (my alumnae panhellenic) suggest a close-up picture (a la senior picture) and a full-length.

Speaking of pictures.... please have her select one that leaves out "props" such as a hat, a dog, a megaphone, or anything else obnoxious or distracting. Just pick a nice picture that looks like her (current hair style, color, etc). The picture does not need to be professional.

LSU Recruitment
 

Question about recommendations at LSU. Possible scenarios:

Is it better to get your own recommendations or is it fine to have the local panhellenic chapter get the recommendation on your behalf and then PNM get letters of support for each sorority on her own?

Either. Personally, I'd get your own recs and letters of support to be sent directly to the chapters.

The Local Alum Panhellenic (AP) will NOT get the recommendation for you. They will simply help you out by explaining how to find recommenders (the same advice you've been getting on GC-- asking everyone you know, church bulletins, family friends, etc.). The AP will provide you with an address that your recommenders can forward the recs to. This address is an AP member who will bundle all the recs and support letters of all the girls in the area and sends them out to their respective schools.

Let me be very clear:YOU DON'T HAVE TO SEND ANYTHING THROUGH THE AP. The AP is simply a middle man (and in my opinion, one that is unnecessary -- but nice for us alums to stay involved). Sending recs directly to the sorority chapter at the school where the PNM will be rushing is fine. It won't harm the PNM that an AP didn't mail the recs. The sorority is not concerned wth the postmark.

Alumnae Panellenics do NOT secure recommendations for PNMs! They simply help you figure out what you need to do so you can go about finding recommenders!

/Former AP recruitment committee member

This may be the case of your alumnae panhellenic, but this clearly varies from AP to AP. I know quite a few Alumnae Panhellenics who will secure a rec for a PNM provided that the PNM has provided them with a resume, pics, etc. In fact, for some areas that I have lived in this is the standard way of getting recs.

Recommendations
 

This is exactly true for our local panhellenic in Texas. They will secure the recs as long as they are provided with all the necessary information. At their meeting, they encouraged the girls to go this route even if they have their own contacts. I just having a difficult time trying to figure out the best route for obtaining the rec - perhaps I will have my daughter turn in her packets to the local panehellenic with a list of people they could contact to have the rec prepared. I know letters of support come from close friends - have many alums from many LSU sororities that can provide these. Some sororities require the rec come from an alum in the girl's hometown and this is why we may have to go the local panhellenic route as most of our close friends are still in Louisiana. Ugh!!!!

Alumnae Panhellenics and recs
 

SOME APs may not get you a rec - ours does, but I know many do not. The best course of action is to do everything you can - register with the AP, work your mom's rolodex, network like crazy - to get recommendations.

That's really stupid. Are you sure that's the case?

Ours does as well. To get a rec through our AP, you have to register with us and then we have designated people that will write a rec for someone who needs it.

Yes. I know of at least one group that requires this.

It seems kind of odd that you'd pass this kind of judgment.

What would be wrong with wanting a rec from the girl's hometown where people would actually know her?

I would have to say I agree here^^

I would place much more weight on a rec coming from someone who truly knows the girl from her hometown. It has always seemed so generic to have a rec written by someone that may not know you or from a person out of the area in which you are distantly connected. Sure you may have a rec from every house on your behalf, but how solid is it and what is it really worth?