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How can I up my chances
abc
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OK, first...cut the tier bullshit.
First, discretion is your friend...we all know you are going to school and can figure out which groups you are interested in...a little discretion goes a long freaking way Keep up your GPA Be sociable If you hadn't gotten your recs in, get them done NOW Most important: KEEP AN OPEN MIND. This post is evident that you are not doing that. You don't want that to turn around and bite you in the ass On yes, use the search button here and do a search for your school. There are probably some threads on it |
Ditto to Jill
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Oh and maybe I'm retarded but how do you search the boards? I really don't know lol
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Sorry if I sound harsh, but you wanted honest, constructive feedback:
Those 2 sororities have their own criteria that they're looking at when choosing members, so we can't really tell you what your chances of getting a bid to either of those 2 are, since membership selection criteria is considered private. I can tell you that with such a competitive recruitment as Vandy that it's a good idea to be open minded to all chapters on campus. It's okay to be interested in those two, but DO consider the possibility that ABC and DEF could cut you. The bottom line is that there are quite a few sororities at Vandy, and you really shouldn't limit yourself to just those 2. It's not a good idea to make judgements like this before recruitment, because you never know how you'll feel about different sororities once recruitment starts and you start meeting girls in other chapters. We've seen it happen a million times here, where girls go into recruitment thinking they only want these 2 or 3 chapters, but finding that they dont really like ABC and DEF as much as they thought. Also consider that you are not IN DEF and ABC, so you really can't say how well you'd "fit." There have been instances on GC where girls get bids to a sorority they LOVED during recruitment, just to find out once they get in, that it's not what they thought it would be. So just keep that mind and make sure that you're making decisions based on more than just "well, they like me" or "they're all cute and really into fashion." A little bit more honesty: While its nice that all of your ABC friends really like you and say you'll fit in well. But that also doesn't guarantee you a bid there. There are alot of girls in each chapter, and membership decisions aren't just up to your friends. We've seen it happen a ton of times where girls will say things like "OMG you're so cute and you'd be perfect here" or "OMG we love you ans you're so going to get a bid" then they get cut from there during recruitment time. So just be aware of that. Knowing these girls doesn't neccessarily guarantee you a spot. And really just generally be aware that these sororities will have other girls that are as interested in them as you are. The sororities have to cut a certain # of women everyday. And while they may like you, you also don't know who they may be meeting during recruitment whom they feel may fit better. It sounds harsh, but it's just being honest. There are times within our chapters where we've liked girls and they didn't get invited back. Some other things, since this is a deferred recruitment school, I'd just watch what you do/say, as that could affect your recruitment in some. I'd also just check out the General Advice thread and the What Not to Say thread. |
The easiest and most effective way IMO is to use google advanced search. Go to google press the advanced link to the right of the search bar. Type in greekchat.com in the website area and any words you are looking for.
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PS: I was absolutely positive I would be going ABC when I went through Recruitment, until I met ADPi. Never, ever close your options! Good luck! |
thanks!
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I think this thread is about Vandy:
http://greekchat.com/gcforums/showth...light=deferred Also, these threads have good advice in them: http://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=54403 http://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=30758 This is a recruitment story thread from a girl who went to a competitive school with deferred January recruitment like Vandy. It's long, but it's a good story, and it shows some of the "no-no's" and has some good advice also: http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ad.php?t=97700 |
Along with the advice given, I'd first advise you to keep your moral standards high. If you behave like a drunken fool at every party or hook up with any guy who pays you attention, you can have a million other GREAT qualities, but you will likely get cut.
Second, keep your GPA high, as good grades always help. Third, get recommendations for EACH house, if possible. A local panhellenic alumnae association can assist you, as can parent's friends, former teachers, etc. Fourth, keep an OPEN MIND. It has been said over and over, but bears repeating, since many do not. Be gracious at any house that invites you to attend, and don't dismiss any chapter prematurely. So often stories are how someone LOVED ABC and then ended up pledging DEF and could never imagine being an ABC. It all depends on the women and how you connect with them. Don't listen to "tent talk", but rather make up your own mind. These are your potential sisters, not someone else's. Fifth and finally, be involved in many campus clubs, organizations and activities. This will allow you to meet many other women (presumably some sorority women) and them a chance to meet you. It will give you a good reputation as someone who gets involved and is a leader on campus. I hope this is helpful to you and truly wish you the best of luck in your upcoming recruitment experience. |
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so it might look like "Vanderbilt Recruitment" site:greekchat.com |
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You can't change what you did, but it's probably best to avoid booze and boys like the plague...at least until after recruitment is over. Be very careful with the drinking as well, especially if you're an underage freshman. |
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It's hard to explain, but the act itself isn't a problem, it's what people say/rumors about it that cause problems with recruitment. All it takes is one misunderstanding or something for a rumor to get started. And as far as drinking, I really would keep a low profile when doing so. I would suggest NOT drinking with sorority girls at all. It's a slippery slope. All it takes is one time for you to go out, have too much to drink, and make a scene for them to be like "OMG vandycandy was being a ridiculous drunk scene." |
I was trying to explain the hooking up issue, but there a multiple situations in which hooking up can affect recruitment:
These are just the ones I can think of, but I am sure there are tons more. And yes, I've actually seen this stuff happen and ruin girls' recruitment chances and they end up without a bid. *You hook up with a guy, there's some drama, and he decides to not like you. He then tells everybody you're a skank, then they tell some sorority girls the same thing. *Girls in ABC (or another sorority) find out you hooked up with these guys, and they decide that you're a skank because of it. *The guys you hooked up with have hooked with ABCs in the past. *You hook up with a guy who is in a fraternity, he tells all of his brothers you're a skank, then they tell all their sorority girl friends. *Worst case: You hook up with a sorority members' bf/or guy that she likes. Big problem because she will tell everybody you're a skank. As far as drinking with ABCs (or any other sorority members), you might think that drinking and hanging with them will work in your favor. But all it takes is one drunken misunderstanding or drama between them to affect recruitment. Examples: *You're drinking with ABCs and you just happen to get too drunk and make a drunken scene of yourself. Even if they're drinking too, they could still be like "OMG did you see vandycandy?" *You get drunk and kiss/talk to/hook up with a guy an ABC likes. Big problem there. *They invite other ABCs (who don't know you) out, and you offend them in some way (which is easy to to do when drinking). Or they just decide not to like you (which girls do). *You get into a drunken misunderstanding with an ABC or any other sorority member, who makes a scene. You might not think it's a big deal, but it could potentially start drama. With girls, something like accidentally spilling your drink on someone is enough to cause drama. *You get drunk and start being all "OMG I sooo love ABC and I can't wait get in." You might think it's cool and that they love you, but they won't if you start this type of stuff when drinking. They'll just think you're a creepo. *They stop being friends with you and they tell all of their sisters you're a lush and you're one of those party girls they don't want. *They tell their friends in other sororities that you're a lush and that you're one of "those girls." *Girls in OTHER sororities see you out, think you only want to join ABC (or that you're a lush) and write you off completely. This might not seem like big deal to you, but it could become one should ABC not invite you back at some point. As you can see, the possibilities are ENDLESS. This is why we tell girls to keep a low profile and not go out and drink. Too many things can cause drama and mess things up for them. This is DOUBLE true for schools with January recruitment because alot of judgement is passed on girls based on what happens during first semester. |
Don't drink...period.
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I have read A LOT of recruitment stories on this board, and I have listened to a lot of recruitment experiences from friends, and there are numerous reasons why a potential new member’s opinions have changed about a chapter (from both negative opinions to positive ones, and vice versa), including: - A sister they talked to one day was amazing, a sister they talked to another day was boring - They didn’t like their house - They loved their house and thought that the sorority clearly took pride in it - The national philanthropy is something the PNM is already involved in - The philanthropy project they did at the recruitment party was juvenile - They found out that their arch-nemesis is in that sorority - The sorority’s skit was outstanding and the sisters put a lot of thought into it - The sorority’s preference party was meaningful and emotional - The sisters ignored her and she was left standing by herself for some of the recruitment event - The sorority has a full social calendar, including mixers with all of the fraternities - The sorority doesn't have many social activities planned and instead participates in more philanthropies - The topic of conversation was all about parties/boys/drinking - The topic of conversation was all about something the she and the sister had in common - There was no topic of conversation and things became awkward - The chapter is involved in a rivalry with another sorority on campus - She sees a sister hitting on her boyfriend at a party - She sees a sister helping another sister with her homework - For the most part, collectively, the sisters have completely different interests than her - A sister talked about another sorority in a negative way - A sister asked her what her opinions were of the other sororities so far - A sister said, “I hope to see you again soon!” - etc., etc., etc. For the most part, these are things that you can't read about on a website or hear about from other potential new members going through recruitment. For all of these reasons (and more) you might find that you absolutely love ABC, that you absolutely love a chapter other than ABC, that you absolutely hate ABC, or that you love 3 different chapters, get invited to all three for their preference parties, and can’t decide which one to rank first. The point is, even if everyone else is telling you, “You’d be perfect for ABC or DEF,” it doesn’t mean that you are. You still know very little about these two chapters, and it sounds as if you know next to nothing about the other ones. Only you can decide which sorority is best for you. Don’t just “go in with an open mind”, go in knowing that anything could happen. |
Yet her greekchat profile still reads:
Interests: Parties, The SEC, raging, the usual Uh . . . alrighty then. |
Just be aware that ABC and DEF are likely two sororities that EVERY freshman is obsessed with and convinced that they have a shot at. Best case scenario? You end up in one of those two. But the danger of deferred rush, especially at a school like Vandy where everybody has a good GPA and is involved on campus, is that most of your peers likely are trying to work their way into the same two sororities. Look around at ALL the houses and try to see the best in them. Your competition will likely be stiff. We can't tell you what those sororities want.
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vandycandy, please do not take this personally, but if you really want to up your chances:
1) Change your user profile. 2) Delete 99% of your current posts in this thread. The very sisters you want to impress may be reading this and shaking their heads. 3) Work on your GPA, so you can really shine next term. Good luck! |
Kind of off topic, but what does "hooking up" actually mean? I've heard people say it encompasses anything from kissing on up, and other people say it's just a polite way of saying "having sex". Thoughts?
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in high school, it was just making out & other stuff (which can include sex) in college, it's sex. making out is baby stuff |
on hooking up:
around here (VA), it can include just making out, but it usually means more. For me, it's the move. Like, if a girl is hitting it off with someone and they go to his or her room (or anywhere, really), then it's hooking up (even if they just make out, for whatever reason). If they just make out on a couch and then don't go anywhere, that doesn't really count. But that's just how I see it (because my friends and I don't have a lot of sex, but we do still "hook up"). I think "Hooking up" is most often anything in between makeout and sex. |
Can I be real honest? I'm imagining you're saying yes because i'm just gonna be. I could ask just a couple of vague questions and know who you are if I net you during recruitment. I know we keep saying "discretion!" but it cannot be over emphasized. Not many girls are above hooking up with a few guys, or even talking about said hookups with friends. However, I would be cautious and quiet with that area of my social life until recruitment is all done. People talk.
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i always thought hooking up was having random sex; with a guy that you just met that night; someone you have not dated.
vandycandy, it sounds like you may have stepped a little out of bounds for someone who will be rushing winter semester, but it is just past midterm right now, so if you start laying low (unless you made a huge spectacle of yourself at a party or elsewhere in public) you will probably be alright. just wait to go out and party after recruitment. double standard it might be, but that is the way it works. |
I agree with what's been posted here, lay low with hook ups and partying. I hope you saw my list of things that could go wrong with that!
I know you probably think that partying with the sorority you like is going to help your chances, but it could end up doing just the opposite. Also consider the fact that if ABC is a "popular" chapter on campus, I can pretty much guarantee you that every other freshman girl you meet who is rushing "thinks she'd fit in well with ABC" or "has friends in ABC." Also be aware that opinions will change so much during recruitment. You may feel like you really like ABC now, but come recruitment, there will be others that you'll find yourself interested in as well. |
One of my friends went to a school with deferred rush and was the "total package" so to speak...looks, grades, personality, GPA, recs, all that. The most competitive sorority on her campus was obsessed with her and dirty rushed her to no end. They would always call her up to party with the sisters, bid promised, all that good stuff. They were fighting the other sororities away to try to get this girl.
Guess what? One night she got wasted with the sisters as usual...but this time she made-out with a sister's crush (she didn't even know the sister was interested in this guy!). No sex, just making out at a public party. Whoops. Anyways the sister flipped out and got in a huge fight with her. Not only did that chapter stop calling her, but other chapters took a step back. She was dropped first night by this chapter and some of the other competitive ones that had been seeking her out. Moral of the story? Even if they are throwing booze and guys at you, tread with caution...don't be the "party pooper" but be very much aware that so much can go wrong even when so much is "going right". |
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It doesn't take much either. You're out with the ABCs, and a guy that Ashley ABC really likes dances with you and you talk to him. Problem. You may not even know that she likes him, but it's still drama enough for her to decide she doesn't want you in ABC. Or you're both drunk and you accidentally spill your drink on an ABCs shirt. It's not like you're sober and it's no big deal, but you're drunk so there's potential for "OMG my shirt is wet and I'm drunk and dramatic!" to get started. That's the worst because it doesn't make any sense, but it's still drama enough for one of them to think twice about you during recruitment. Or one time you guys go out and YOU just happen to get more drunk than the other girls and you maybe do/say something dumb. Or you get wasted and puke in one of their cars or in their apt./dorm. Again, it might not seem like a big deal, but that's enough to make one of them think "do we really want this girl?" |
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I agree with all of the warnings about the potential pitfalls of partying with the sorority you want to be in. I don’t think you necessarily need to avoid it entirely, but be rather conservative when you do — only have one or two (not very strong) drinks, if you drink at all, and don’t hook up with anyone. It’s easy to have fun and be fun without risking starting drama by getting to drunk or kissing the wrong boy.
Also keep in mind that even if you have friends who think you will be great in one sorority, not every sister feels that way, especially if you’ve been spending a fair amount of time with the group. For example, my society does very informal rush, including letting people party with us. There was one girl who some of my closest friends and I really loved; she seemed to fit right in. I was convinced we would ask her to join…until I started talking to some of my other sibs. She had come to some of our parties and made out with a number of guys. It didn’t bother me because I liked her so much, but a lot of other members were bothered by it. Plus it turns out they thought she was kind of annoying, anyway. She didn’t get a bid. Fortunately, I hadn’t said anything to her about how I felt about her, but if I had, she would have thought she was a shoe in, because that’s what I thought (which is why we strongly discourage members from saying anything other than “the selection process is complicated, I don’t know what will happen” if anyone asks…). I’m sure everyone here has stories about their rush crush who didn’t get asked for one reason or another, even when they thought that girl was awesome and a perfect fit. So, there's really no garentee until you have a bid in your hand. I really agree that you shouldn't get your heart set on only one or two groups yet. Also, I really can't stress the not getting wildley drunk part enough. My chapter is fairly laid back and will normally forgive someone one or two embarrassing drunken incidents, but even with us, if it is a repeated problem, or if what they do when they get drunk crosses a line (becoming belligerent), than that is definitely a reason someone won’t be getting a bid. |
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