Concerned Pledge
 

I am a pledge and we are fairly far into the pledge process. Initiation is only a few weeks away. I have fallen behind in my studies and my parents are a little concerned and want to me to drop my pledgeship. What is the best way to do this? How should I approach the fraternity and tell them that I must drop my pledgeship?

Well, if you are only a few weeks away the damage is already done to your studies. In business that's called a "sunk cost"...even if you depledge you will still be behind. After you are initiated you will have less responsibility and can manage your academics AND gain the benefits of fraternity life. I'd honestly stay stick with it...if you depledge you will have wasted all your studies for nothing and it certainly won't suddenly make you up to speed in your classes.

yes, i am a freshman. I feel that it is taking a decent amount of my time and am wondering how I can address my concerns and potential depledging with my organization.

Your grammar is hideous.

I get the feeling the fraternity didn't hurt you academically.

Perhaps it's different for others but once I was initiated and became an active member I had MORE to do, not less. You might want to look at what the actives are required to do, what excuses you are allowed to submit, etc...

It's a fraternity. He's not required to do anything, he can be socially active and pay dues, never go to chapter, and do every social event they have. Pledging is way more work unless you want to be an officer.

that is not true, I know my chapter requires attendace in chapter meetings or you get fined, a good GPA to be able to vote, and 15 hours of community service each semester

interesting to note. All I know is my boyfriend does A LOT with his fraternity but they are still in the process of chartering so I'm not sure if that's a very good example.

Does your fraternity require you go to the library and study? You should probably miss some of the non-required social events in order to study and get back up. This is really blunt but if you flunk out of college you're of no use to the fraternity.

Since you're so close to initiation you should talk to your pledge educator and explain your situation and what is required of actives (though you should have a good grasp of what the actives do by now).

If you realize you can't handle classes and just being an active brother maybe you should depledge. Your grades should come first.

How should I go about informing the brothers and my pledge class of my decision to depledge?

Have you talked to your pledge trainer? He's the one you should be speaking to about your concerns or your depledging.

He didn't listen :(

Yeah, I just checked the Fraternity Recruitment forum and saw that you told him the same thing at 11:39 am yesterday. But, seriously, why doesn't he know to talk to his pledge trainer about this anyway? :rolleyes:

Because that would require actual effort on his part! Can't have that!

It's absolutely true at my chapter and most others that I'm familiar with. Anyways, how's sorority life treating you?

*dead*

I call bogus on this guy.

In the remote case that this is not bogus, the way to quit is to say to your pledge educator or president, "I quit" and hand in your pin.

How to drop out
 

Pay up any dues owed for this month so you're paid up. Check with the chapter treasurer to see if you are paid up. Type up a letter with today's date stating that you are dropping out of pledgeship. Sign the letter. Give to your pledgemaster with any pin or paraphernalia you have been given. CC a copy to the president and chapter adviser.

Hahahaha...no but really, I pretty much agree. All of the fraternities my friends are in have absurdly lax policies for what you have to show up for and they still have great social, rush, etc. I guess it's just one of the bigger differences between fraternities and sororities.

I understand that I will need to speak to my pledge educator, but what would be the best way to approach this? Should I send him an email asking to set up a meeting, or wait until after a pledge meeting to address my concerns?

I still say just stick it out. College has plenty of things to distract you other than fraternity life. Pledging is by far more work than being a brother and you are admittedly almost done with it already. So you have terrible grades and nothing to show for it this semester if you drop. My grades were a little worse as a pledge, but not significantly so. It all comes down to time management and work ethic, if you aren't making good grades to start with dropping pledging isn't going to help, you're just going to get distracted by something else instead.

That said, if you really want to quit just go to the damn house and talk to him, you don't need to set up a meeting and try to deal with this by email.

This is a HORRIBLE attitude. Holding pledges to a higher standard than the brothers is a disaster. It sets your chapter up for failure, or at least a smaller amount of success than it would otherwise be capable. Brothers at my chapter have a MUCH harder time than the pledges. We require you be at at chapter meetings, initiation and pledging ceremonies, and I-Week activities, Have committed to memory part of the ritual, and participation in some sort of philanthropy EVERY semester.

You might call us a "sorority" but we're in the process of making good men better, and not all about going out and "having a good time." We can have a good time, but business needs to be taken care of first. thats all there is to it.


to answer the OP's question: Just be a man about it. Go to a pledge meeting and say it in front of your pledge brothers and your pledge educator. Let them know how you feel, that you enjoyed your time with the guys, that you'll try and come back if your studies allow it, and be done with it. The pledge ed will let the brothers know.