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-   -   Amount of Time before He proposed? (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=60737)

MsCongeniality3 12-15-2004 04:11 PM

Amount of Time before He proposed?
 
I got a question. My boyfriend feels there should be a certain amount of time before proposing to someone: his reasoning stems off his brother getting engaged in 6 months and his grandparents being together for over 55 years. How long was it before your man proposed?


P.S. I am not looking for an engagement but hope that it will happen someday.

KillarneyRose 12-15-2004 04:30 PM

I met my husband on April 30th and he proposed to me on May 31st. We'll be married 13 years this coming March

(reposted because I checked my journal and it wasn't the 24th :) )

chideltjen 12-15-2004 04:31 PM

I know a couple that have been boyfriend/girlfriend for 8 years now and they haven't gotten engaged yet (thought it's inevitable.)

Another eloped after 2 years dating (no real proposal.)

One of my sisters got engaged after 4-5 years.

And I have a friend that is engaged and they were only dating for about a month before he proposed.

Bottom line... it just depends I guess.

XOMichelle 12-15-2004 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by KillarneyRose
I met my husband on April 30th and he proposed to me on May 24th. We'll be married 13 years this coming March :)
Awesome. My friend's parent's were dating for two months when they got engaged, and knew eachother 4 when they got married. About 6 months ago his mother (at 66) said 'marying your father was the best decision I ever made'. How cool is that?

aephi alum 12-15-2004 05:20 PM

It was a little under 10 months from my first date with my husband to the day he proposed. But we were engaged for over two years (we wanted to finish grad school before getting married).

I don't think there needs to be an arbitrary "minimum time" for a couple to date before getting engaged, if you each know the other person is The One.

TNPhiMu 12-15-2004 05:59 PM

Me and my man were together about 2 months shy of 2 years when he proposed in August. He was going to wait until our anniversary, but he said he knew I would be expecting it(at least, more so than a random Saturday in August) and he said he just couldn't wait any longer :)

sageofages 12-15-2004 06:26 PM

Re: Amount of Time before He proposed?
 
Quote:

Originally posted by MsCongeniality3
I got a question. My boyfriend feels there should be a certain amount of time before proposing to someone: his reasoning stems off his brother getting engaged in 6 months and his grandparents being together for over 55 years. How long was it before your man proposed?


P.S. I am not looking for an engagement but hope that it will happen someday.

I am imagining you will get the whole range of answers...

Mr Sageofages and I went on our first date, and have been together ever since. He proposed at about 4 months after our first date, then again at 6 months and then at 8 months and then 9 months, then 10 months, well you get the picture...anyway, it was about 2 years before I said yes...he did keep asking though!

My parents were engaged 7 days after their first date. They have been married 45 years.

AKA_Monet 12-15-2004 07:31 PM

I think it depends on what you want out of a relationship. If you want the man you are with to propose to you and the relationship with where you both want it to be and marriage is what you both are looking for, then time is of no value...

But if one person does not want to be married (usually the man) and the other does (usually the woman), then there won't be a proposal...

Mr. AKA_Monet proposed to me, over the phone, one day in March, 2003. If we didn't have an argument, we would be married in July, 2003. But, because we did, we eloped in May, 2003... I had met Mr. AKA_Monet in person in December, 2002 for NYE...

AChiOAlumna 12-15-2004 07:59 PM

My husband and I met in August 1993. We were engaged July 1994 and married July 1995 (5 days shy from when he proposed!!!).

We've been married 9-1/2 wonderful years!

texas*princess 12-15-2004 09:19 PM

I think for a "minimum" time it would greatly vary depending on the people.

WHat about a "maximum" time? I mean in a hypothetical world if a couple had been dating for YEARS... and they both say they want to get married someday, but neither really do anything to get to that point (of getting engaged and married) is there a certain time when one of them would just be better off finding someone that won't take 547 years to propose? :p

MsCongeniality3 12-15-2004 11:14 PM

My stepfather's father had dated a woman for over 30 years but never married her, so yea there is a point.

I guess the biggest thing is that my boyfriend will just have to realize if he wants to get married or not. We'll see... I just don't think time matters as much. Especially when people are engaged around a year before marriage.

James 12-15-2004 11:24 PM

Groan . . . The One, in capitals . . . someone keep me from spewing . . . :p


Quote:

Originally posted by aephi alum


I don't think there needs to be an arbitrary "minimum time" for a couple to date before getting engaged, if you each know the other person is The One.


KillarneyRose 12-16-2004 12:14 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by texas*princess
WHat about a "maximum" time? I mean in a hypothetical world if a couple had been dating for YEARS... and they both say they want to get married someday, but neither really do anything to get to that point (of getting engaged and married) is there a certain time when one of them would just be better off finding someone that won't take 547 years to propose? :p

This reminds me of my great aunt and her boyfriend. They started dating so long ago that my mom remembers her aunt telling her that she could be the flower girl when they got married.

Now, my mom's pushing 61 and the boyfriend passed away two or three years ago so I guess it's never gonna happen :(

My cousins and I used to amuse ourselves speculating on whether, during their 50+ years of dating, they'd ever done the nasty.

Coramoor 12-16-2004 12:15 AM

I think that sometimes people propose and get engaged after a short time is more because they are afraid of being alone and don't want to be in the single scene anymore, not only b/c they are in 'love'.

I'm not going to say that is how it always is, b/c obviously there are people out there that have good marriages after a really short courting period.

I dated a girl for almost 2 years, but it never crossed my mind to get her a ring. I was happy, but marriage is something else entirely.

Sistermadly 12-16-2004 09:25 AM

I met my DH in person on November 12 (after 2.5 months correspondence). He proposed on November 13.


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