Some of my girls guessed that I was in Sigma Kappa because they saw a picture of me in a scrapbook. My face was covered, but not my hair, and they were like "You're the only Rho Gamma with short brown hair." Luckily, they didn't tell the rest in my group. The ones who didn't know guessed that I was in Theta or AOII.

I was wrong about all two of mine. I guessed the Phi Mu was a DG, the DG was an ADPi, and the Chi O I got right.

We made our group guess every night. I was overwhelmingly a Chi O on the first night. By the third about a fourth were convinced I was a DG because they swore that my "sisters" had accidentally left a picture of me uncovered. Neither I nor the DG's I know can figure out who I got mixed up with to this day. Two thought I was an ADPi because I talked to their alum a lot and got bleary-eyed at their video (I was Exec and got to go into the parties and that video was amazing), only a few guessed Alpha Gam. One said I had the personality for it (the best compliment I got the whole time) and one said she just couldn't see me anywhere else. They didn't guess anything else.


On Pref night I on purpose chose to wear what the Chi O's wear on Pref night (they wear black and pearls, which we wear on Open House, and red and pearls on Open House, which we wear for pref, so I just switched) since the majority of my group thought I was one. I went to my own pref party first and tried as hard as I could not to cry, but in the end I did. A few of them even saw it. I had many of the same girls for Chi O, which I went to next. I sat next to their adviser and talked to her, but didn't even get close to tearing up (they have a great pref, but it's not the same when it's not your own chapter). My girls were walking out of the room winking at me and giving me thumbs up. And I am going...

COME ON.

Besides, if I were a Chi O, would I really have worn my own Pref night outfit to pref? Wouldn't that be TOO easy?

Sneaky ;)

When I was a rho chi, we were instructed not to wear anything resembling any chapter's pref night outfits on pref night. The Alpha Phis wore white and everyone else wore black, so that meant we could wear whatever we wanted as long as it wasn't all-black or all-white. I wore a black-and-white print.

We didn't have such creatures. We had summertime "big sisters" who were really pen pals who were sorority members. They weren't required to hide their affiliation.

Nor were we required to visit all the chapters on campus.

When I was a Rho Chi, we interviewed talked with our groups about stereotypes on the first day (i.e. there are different kinds of people in every org) and from those meetings we extracted what we thought some of the steroetypes were and tried to break those thoughts throughout recruitment. One of the fun things we did was wear things things that the PNMs claimed that certain sororities wore (Phi Mus always wore Tiffany silver pearls with silver pearl earings, Sigma Kappa always wore overalls, ZTA always wore black pants, AZDs were "hippie-ish"). So different Rho Chis would wear those stereotype outfits to PNM meetings. The night before Rho Chi reveal we had the girls sooo confused, one PNM would say that I was a Phi Mu because she saw me wear tiffanys silver pearls, another would say that I was a SK because I wore overalls....

My Rho Chis were an AZD (though I swore she was a Phi Mu) and a Phi Mu (who I swore was a Zeta).

We're still waiting on this, P - it's one I would absolutely read!:D

I wasn't either, but I did anyway, because I didn't want to assume the first person who was nice to me in a sorority was in the right sorority for me.

I didn't have a Rho Chi because I went through structured informal - the only disaffiliated people were the Panhel officers (one of whom became my 3 big).

Why are you so against Rho Chis, Tess?

She's apparently against anything traditionally Greek.

And because using Rho Chis and forcing all rushees to go to every house is denying these young women their individuality and responsibility to take care of themselves. Why do they need to be lead around campus by the nose and required to spend 20 minutes with a group before making a lifelong decision that is then followed by a much-too-short pledge period? They should know everything at 18 or 19, they are adults after all, should experience the "good" parts of hazing and don't need to be beaten over the head by risk management training.

... or something to that effect.... am I close?

I don't believe in hiding affiliation.

I believe young women who are attending college are capable of making up their own minds. I don't think they need to be spoon-fed; if they make a wrong decision, it's part of the learning experience. We all make wrong decisions in our lives. We learn; we move on.

I don't think it's important to make young women believe any sorority is better than no sorority.

Mind you, I despise formal rush as it's done on most campuses, too. It reminds me of arranged marriages, with PanHel standing in for parents. I think it leads to the type of membership selection that is stereotyped and leads to selection based on looks or clothes rather than souls and minds.

Thank you for responding in my stead.

And no, for all your astute observations, I'm not. I'm all for candle-passing ceremonies, rushing, pledging, semester-long pledgeships, pledge rituals, and life-long commitment. I believe pledges should get to know all the sisters in the house, should have to do chores for the good of the house, and should learn. I believe sisterhood is for life, but I don't like all my blood sisters either.

Thank you for replying in my stead.

BINGO!!!! Nailed it!!! Where's my prize?!? :)

Nor need you agree with me. However, expecting reward for understanding someone else's position is not very adult, is it?

"Seek first to understand" is a very valuable lesson. Becoming catty about same is less than becoming, in my opinion.