When I say understanding I mean I personally wanted to understand it

I mean I would agree with you about the fear thing if it wasn't for the incredibly consistent stories I have been told, thats all

They are presenting a united front.

Idk, these include the friends of mine and the drunken babble. That's a pretty impressive united front if it's true

I think for your peace of mind, stop asking "Why?" It's not worth it. It isn't worth it for biologically female women who aren't offered bids either. If you read recruitment stories on GC, you will see that asking ALWAYS leads to heartache. The stories you hear are hearsay, one sided and NEVER provide a full picture of why you did not receive a bid. Realize that it is unlikely that an entire group voted against you. Some of the groups very well may have decided you were ineligible for membership. You would need strong backing for a group to go head to head against their alumnae or HQ if they knew and said no. What you need to understand is that the institution of sororities is still too conservative to accept a MtoF transgender woman. It's not an indictment of you as a person but of society in general. Period.

Anna, just a tip. You can edit your posts to form more coherent paragraphs. I suspect you're posting from a smart phone because it's coming across a bit "text message".

Yeah I am "texting" as it were.

I think I'm gonna leave this convo now and really GC all together more or less. I got what I came here looking for, answers. I hope you guys continue talking about this on your own. I think it's an important topic ad the only way it will get better is by an open dialogue. I just hope sororitysock doesn't come looking for me on campus or anything. The level of creepy she had displayed already is really unsettling. Thank you all for being so nice to me! I hope things really do change one day

It sucks that your friend's job is the only thing holding her back from surgery, if that's what she wants. On the other hand, if she's who I think she is, I can see where it would be hard to give up a gig that lucrative.

There are many reasons someone could be "cut" from recruitment, informal or formal - grades, personality, fit, class year, partying...a lot of things impact membership selection.

Without divulging anything that would reveal the person or year, I had a friend that I brought to an informal recruitment event when I was an undergrad. I LOVED her, and thought she was a perfect fit for our sorority - good grades, funny as could be, adorable, got along with a bunch of the girls. She seemed to get along great with many of the women at the party, but....unbeknownst to me (or her, really, because she was drunk and it was freshman year) she had PUNCHED one of the other members in the face at a party. Another member had been a floormate of hers freshman year, and she had done some shady things with the member's belongings and a garbage chute. My friend didn't end up getting a bid. Was I upset? Yes. But I also understood that allowing her in would have put my initiated sisters in an awkward place. But she found her home elsewhere.

As for the larger question, I think in the next 5-10 years groups will need to have some kind of policy in place - and I think that, as general opinion evolves, so will Greek life policies. I'm of the opinion that if the person identifies as female, we should honor the identification/pronouns.

^^^ That. It was Title IX that caused the fraternities to get rid of their little sister groups because they would lose their exemption. And Title IX says "sex", not "gender". Sororities and fraternities are not the only organizations trying to figure out how to manage the issues that arise. Dorms sometimes now have transgender floors and unisex community bathrooms (which I would have found absolutely HORRIFYING at that age).

The NCAA has formulated this criteria for participation in sports and it isn't that different from what we are saying here. I tried to cut and paste but I can't - it's on page 13. It essentially says that if not medically transitioning, athletes have to compete on the team in accordance with their assigned birth gender.
http://www.ncaa.org/sites/default/fi...2011_Final.pdf

Thank you for the explanation! I was really mystified by the emphasis on full transition from some posters.

Medically transitioning doesn't mean surgically. It means hormonally. That is all the NCAA cares about because the hormonal status of an athlete will effect their abilities on the field/court. They don't really care what is between the players legs.

Been reading and researching. "Sex" =/= "Gender". Important distinction. More to learn.

From things I've learned over the years, through news programming and documentaries, I knew that sex and gender aren't equal. In the same vain that a "cross dresser" isn't necessarily a transgender. Then you get into the sexuality aspect. Such as a biological male who is a transgender female but dates women.

Can make your head swim to think of all the variations.