Oh I agree, you're preaching to the choir. BA DUMP BUMP

Low C Sharp is an alto who compared herself to Daria, and therefore (I hope), female.

I've been around GC since 2001, and I understand the process perfectly well. If I need to pass a Green Book quiz before I can contribute to the thread, I'm happy to take it.

If my potential spouse was going to charge me a lot of money, I'd sure as hell want to know how much it would be before I accepted a ring. Especially if, as at Bama, it's probably the only ring I'll ever get. Furthermore, if I wanted to discuss our financial future together during courtship, and he wouldn't discuss it and held it against me that I asked...I'd think that was deeply unfair of him.

A woman DOES always have a choice...she can decide not to list a sorority she can't afford on her pref card. If she gets a less-expensive option, then great, and if she doesn't, no one will ever know why she dropped from recruitment. In contrast, if she shows up at Bid Day, her name is in the paper as a new member of XYZ, and she has to drop when she finds out the cost, that happens in public. Not to mention that it would be much more disappointing to discover that the sorority is unaffordable after enjoyig the Bid Day fun versus knowing from the get-go that XYZ is just not an option.

Yes, given Bama's system, the best advice is not to rush unless you can afford the top of the stated range. But it would really be nice if students who can't quite afford the most expensive chapter had the opportunity to shoot for an affordable chapter.

Yes, costs can change from year to year. But a multi-thousand-dollar shift is unlikely absent house acquisition or some other major development, and that kind of change is generally well publicized.

This. Especially with the 200-woman chapters at Bama. No one who makes a good faith effort can fail to make friends in a group that size.
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Mflb information

Alabama Bid Day time
 

I am trying to find out what time Bid Day is at Alabama on Sunday. We called it Squeal Day in my time but I am considering driving over. The panhellenic web site does not have it posted. Thanks!

Nancy:)

It's at noon, Nancy.

I wonder how margretlee's daughter's Rush went!

My daughter had an amazingly wonderful time at rush. She took off two old row sororities due to unknown cost estimates, and they invited her back anyway, haha. She took them off her list a second time, and they dropped her. So whoever thinks that the PNM has no control over rush is mistaken, If you truly don't want to get invited back, you can make that happen by just not acting interested. These two were not her top choices, anyway.

During final round she got selected to her top choice of her three Preference Day parties. So she is very happy and very excited. Along the way she got cut by a couple that she was interested in, and pursued by a couple that she was not interested in, but at the end of the day she thinks that she has found a really good fit!

I had decided not to post here again, but changed my mind for a couple of reasons. Not everyone on here is rude (I guess that's a subjective term, but assuming that my daughter would be cut, calling her the "Salesman's daughter", saying my comments were "tacky". "snobby", etc. is considered rude where I come from), as I had several private messages to me apologizing for the rudeness shown. (Incidentally, my husband is a stock broker. I do not think that there is any shame in that.) But the main reason I am following up with this update is that I read on another forum where a young lady, unrelated to us, had similar questions. People were giving her the same advice: drop out. My advice to her, if it's not too late, is don't drop out! My daughter has been having the time of her life bonding with her new sorority sisters, and I am so glad we did not listen to that advice!

I hope that the Greek system at Bama and elsewhere will do a better job of informing PNM of the costs. Would not that be better upfront? Then they might not lose so many members in the future due to financial reasons. Incidentally, my daughter received NOTHING regarding costs from ANY sorority at Bama during the entire rush process, including the one with which she pledged. She had to rely on the sheets given out at Panhellenic weekend (and the ones NOT given out.) I hope that the Panhellenic there will do a better job, as these sororities may be missing out on some really top notch, classy girls with good reputations and great grades if they don't make the info. available in the future. BTW, to the poster who suggested we email or call Panhellenic if it was such a big deal, I did send an email to them prior to ever joining this board. Unfortunately, it went unanswered. I guess cost is a forbidden topic at Bama rush, because my daughter did not feel comfortable asking at any time.

Many, many thanks for the words of encouragement from the 7 people who sent me private messages. Thank you for taking the time to write to me. "All's well that ends well."

Is this honestly why members drop out? I've never heard that before - I thought it was more due to burnout. Unless the poster means rushees instead of members.

The only reason I suggested that your daughter drop out is because you apparently wanted her to choose a sorority based on price, rather than how she felt about the chapter. That's unfair to her and a horrible position to put her in. I sincerely hope that she ends up ok with the group she is in, rather than wishing a few years down the road that she had been able to look at the old row (barf, I can't believe I'm even typing that) groups she cut. Or should I say - that you pretty much forced her to cut.

From my experience, girls drop the most for the following "main" reasons:

1)transfer to different institution for various reasons
2)money issues
3)grades
4)bad fit (for lack of better words)

I meant members, not rushees. I have two friends that are alums who are very actively involved with their chapters, and they told me that grades & financial are the two main reasons that they see girls drop out.

No, I did not want her to choose one based on price rather than how she felt. I wanted her to find a good fit that was affordable for us. There is a difference. If we were merely shopping for price, I would have been seeking out the lowest priced one. That is absoultely not true. I doubt the old row houses that she took off of her list would have kept her in the end anyway, as they pretty much took their own legacies first. My daughter is intelligent enough to know that if she got in over her head financially, that she would look back and regret that. I think that for you to call what I did unfair is really a good indicator of your total lack of grasp of the situation. You apparently would rather see a really wonderful girl sit off to the side and always and forever wonder what sorority life would have been like, than to see her in a place where she is very happy. Because that is exactly what would happen if she pledged one and we got a bill for $6K per semester. She would have had to withdraw, and I wanted to spare her that embarrassment. This way, she is happy, we are happy, and the sorority is very happy to have her. Why on earth would you want to deprive someone of that experience, just because they cannot afford the most expensive one? That makes zero sense to me. BTW, the only person that matters in this issue is my daughter, and she recognizes the current economic climate, and has never once acted like I was being unfair to her. Besides that, "Life is not always fair." It's a sad fact, but we all have to deal with it at some point or another. Learning to compromise is an essential life skill and I am most proud of my daughter for going through this excercise with grace and dignity.

Or perhaps a good indicator that your explanations of the situation in your first posts didn't come across quite the way you meant them to, maybe? Just maybe?

OK, so we have seen the "average" costs on the UA Panhellenic website. On Panhellenic weekend, some sororities gave out cost sheets. However, not all of them did. We can defintiely afford a sorority, especially one of the "average" cost ones. However, we would prefer to stay in that range, so that she will have plenty of money for clothes, tshirts, etc. Is there anyone here that can tell us which ones are the most expensive ones, or rank them according to approximate
cost?
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We have money allotted for this, so don't need a payment plan, but would love to stay within a certain range, as we have two other kids coming up right behind her!

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IDK how I could have been any clearer. We have some money set aside, but don't want to exceed it, so we wanted to make sure and stay in that range????????

In my post I also meant members.

I haven't read this whole thread, but I did want to assure the OP that most schools with a greek system do offer a financial breakdown, either prior to or at the beginning of recruitment. Maybe your daughter can become involved with the Panhellenic system, and push for that type of information to be distributed in the future.