Hmmm, your response seems a little contradictory. In that context the "you people" would not have bothered me. Should she have said you non-Chinese people? Some of "us people" need to be more selective in picking our battles.

yeah he was rather patronizing to you. What was your response?

I understand that the woman did not mean to be offensive, but I don't like being referred to as "you people" no matter what the context. I don't like the way it sounds and, while I won't walk away or fuss, the look on my face reflects that sentiment. There's nothing contradictory about that.

In my Multicultural class, I recounted my story of a white student at our school asking my opinion as a "colored" woman. :mad::rolleyes: I knew she didn't mean any harm, but she got "the face." It bothered me and I let her know it in as non-confrontational a way as I could.

How do you know she got the message? If it bothers you that much then you should say something in a diplomatic way. Otherwise they will keep doing it.

As for the term "you people" are you guys, you all, or y'all okay? To me it is a matter of context not the words themselves.

If it is a matter of context for you, that's fine. I don't like the phrase at all. IME none of the other phrases has never been said to me in demeaning way. "You people" has so I don't like that one and will make that preference known if someone is talking to me.

Well I definitely can't dispute your experiences, nor should I. It's just too bad that the the intended use of the term to demean is still perceived as such today. I guess for me it is one of those "don't sweat the small stuff" since in my experiences I have been demeaned in much worse fashion.

The next time someone uses the term, try using it term back at them and see how they respond. You might find it funny, because my guess is it will go over their heads. And if you really push it they will be bewildered. LOL

Well, "you people" can have non-race implications that depend on the tone and the context. That's just something to keep in mind because the longer you live, the more you'll experience.

But, if something catches your attention, and you want to give the person the benefit of the doubt, simply say in a neutral tone "yes, many Americans only like crab legs...but some of us eat whole crabs." Even if the person was being racial, that can remove whatever context that person intended and many people will get the point. If they are adament, they will try to assert the racial implications by saying "no, I meant Black people" to which you can respond with "oh, please, next time just say 'Black people' instead of 'you people'...I find that plenty of Black people love whole crabs if we can find restaurants that serve it, etc."

Facial expressions can be passive aggressive and just as silly as walking away or fussing. Most professional and nonprofessional contexts are opportunities for adults to talk and to learn, in nonconfrontational and noncondescending tones. :) Again, facial expressions can be extremely confrontational and passive aggressive, so next time also simply talk to your "colored" classmate.

"You guys" is only okay if the speaker is talking to/about a group of guys.

ETA: I laughed when I read christiangirl say that "you guys" has never been used with her in a condescending tone. I understand that people, particularly women, jokingly and lightheartedly use it out of habit. However, as far as I and many are concerned, there's no noncondescending way to assume gender, race, class, or sexual orientation neutrality. I am not a "guy," even on my worst day. So, save the references to maleness for when you're only talking about or to males.

^^Thanks for the comments ladies I'll keep that in mind. ;)

This girl just said "I have allergies, but I'm not allergic to anything." Then went on to try to explain why that made perfect sense. She failed. :confused:

I knew something crazy was gonna happen because we were on the reproduction section in my Human Anatomy class

The professor was explaining the content of semen and that it has a lot of sodium. And (I say) the stupidest girl in the world raises her hand and asks, "is that why it tastes so salty?":eek: A hush fell over the lecture hall until somebody yelled out "HA!!!!" then the whole room including the professor couldn't stop laughing.

I think this happens in every Bio class. It happened when I was in high school. I've started to wonder if that's some sort of running joke and no class is complete until someone says it. :rolleyes:

My Kids and I often travel Alone without my husband, which often prompt many to ask if they are mine because they look like him. my husband is white and i am black. well on our particular trip to california due to me being activated while i was in the military i was taking my kids to visit their grandparents and we were meeting him there. well while we boarded the plane this one white lady became purely fascinated by my two year old son who at the time had extremely curly light brown/blond curls. And while he was playing gleefully while waiting for the plane the lady decided to walk over to me and ask questions
the first question was "where did you adopt your children?" the questions startled me for a second before i told her that my kids where not adopted but naturally born by me
second question was " but you're so black how is that possible?
my answer to her was " every now and again the massa sneaks to the slave quarters"
of which left her with her jaw hanging wide open. the only thing thatr sucked even more from the questions was the fact that we were in the same row on the flight. i kept shaking my head wanting to laugh at her after she was trying so hard not to stare at both of my kids

LOL. I'm embarassed for her.

We never discussed semen and sodium in biology class or sex education (looking back, we didn't discuss much of anything in sex ed in the early 90s).

We never discussed semen and sodium in biology class or sex education (looking back, we didn't discuss much of anything in sex ed in the early 90s).[/QUOTE]

Yeah...we didn't either...the last and only sex ed class we had was in the 7th grade by my football coach.

Lol, our sex ed was taught by a nun in the Religion class. We didn't learn much except the basics--where babies came from and that some teens choose to please themselves as they start to explore their bodies (but we better not do that). :rolleyes: