Yeah cuz the rats ate them

I'm sorry, but that was HILARIOUS!!!

I can see the roach flying out of her purse talking about, "Give us free!!!"

:D

ASGDYDKM!!!!

Get dat on!:D

lookahere:mad:
what are you talking about?

My Dearest marquise1911,

Please explain what this means, or else I will start calling you the black tom earp.

Your good friend in GC,

teena

:confused:

You are gonna get me fired!!! that isht was funny:D :D :D

Awe sh.. Got-Daymn You Done Killed Me!!!:D

Everytime I read this I'm dying!!!! Daymn!!! I'm coughing and my eyes are watering. LAWD!!!:D

You are going to get me in trouble laughing at you.:D

I just keep getting this visual of the roach flying out like a huge brown butterfly.

And her thoughts went like this:

~~~umph....marquise sho is fine. I'm a put it on him and make him mine tonight. I got my Vickie Secrets on. Im ready. My breath is......hmmmm....wait let me get a piece of gum.~~~
***OPENS PURSE***
~~~is that a____:eek: that cant be a____....Oh Jesus in heaven, hollowed by thy name, PLEASE Jesus let that not be what I think it is. OW Lawd, IT IS. IT IS! I wish I had magical powers so I could make myself disappear. WAIT. Maybe he didnt see it and everything will be ok.
***Looks over at Marquise and see his eyes stretched so wide that the vessels in his eyelids threaten to pop***


Marquise thoughts went like this:
~~~ I know this nasty chick DID NOT bring a roach to my house:eek: ~~~

He consoled her by rubbing her back saying "its alright" and gently(because he's a gentleman) pushing her out the door.

Dearest and most favorite aunt,

I love you so much. I aspire to be like you in many ways. Your generousity(sp) knows no limits. You are nearing retirement age yet you look like a woman in her early fifties. I love you so much.

I am so angry with you. You hurt me. Physically. You made my stomach, eyes, ear, and speen hurt. The pain is permanent. I think I may require mental health counseling, right now. I asked you how was one of my uncles doing. You stated that you wished that I hadnt asked you that. I say why. You say because he just got out of the hospital. I go :eek: Oh no. I ask what happened. You tell me he was hospitalized because he used viagra and the 'effects' wouldnt subside.:eek: (insert vomiting smilie here).

one word
three syllables(sp)

TMI

I know I shouldn't laugh at your own or your uncle's/aunt's misfortune, but BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Why, oh, why??

enigma_AKA

I would laugh too, If I werent so emotionally traumatized.

I luv my aunt. She's the one in the family that will say...that is one ugly baby. You better hope this baby is smart...cuz wooo, it is ug-lay.

Update!
 

I posted this in another thread on 4/26. Since then, I've seen said little boy (still love him dearly) and his momma yesterday when they came over to visit. Momma just had another baby on the 10th; I haven't seen the baby yet. I showed her a pic of my bf in my camera phone and we talked about her niece's mannerisms. That was about the extent of our convo the entire day, especially since I had spent most of my time cleaning the house instead of chilling with the guests. :rolleyes: The reason being that the last time we had spoken or seen each other, she was supposed to go with my family to a Crab Feast and when she couldn't attend, she wanted a refund. My mother and HER SISTER- who'd attended- tried to tell her that there are NO REFUNDS once the tickets have been received in the mail about a week b4 said event. She the proceeded to call my mother a LIAR (her late mother and my mother were best friends) and told her grandparents what my mother had told her. The people had no idea WTHWGO being that they'd never been to a Crab Feast. Hence, why I choose not to speak to her.

Dear Faculty and Staff at Any High School USA:

I want you to know that the majority of you suck at doing your job (which is supposed to be educating students). Therefore, at the faculty Bar-B-Que after the last day of school, I will make it my assignment and my duty to get slithered and tell those who suck about themselves, so I suggest you get ready because you got two days...and it's going down!:mad: :p :eek:

To the woman in the cube next to me:

What is wrong with you?!?!?! Why are you crying like someone done beat you or something.

What's that? You're crying over a HORSE? The horse that broke it's leg in that race over the weekend?

Did you place a bet that the horse would win and you'd get a large sum of money or something? No?

You're just crying because you think it's 'so sad' and you want to 'send a card of condolences to the jockey and his family'?

I know I've asked you so many questions, but I just have ONE more...

WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?!?!?!

I KNOW YOU ARE NOT UP IN HERE SNIFFLING AND SNOTTING OVER MR. ED BREAKING HIS FRIGGIN' LEG IN A RACE IN WHICH YOU HAD NO MONEY PLACED ON??? I KNOW YOU ARE NOT SERIOUSLY CONSIDERING SENDING A 'GET WELL SOON' CARD TO SOME STUPID ANIMAL! IN CASE YOU DIDN'T KNOW, HORSES CAN'T READ!!!

STOP TRYING TO GET ATTENTION FROM THE REST OF THE TEAM BY CRYING OVER SEABISCUIT AND STFU!!!

HOW ABOUT I COME OVER TO YOUR DESK TO CONSOLE YOU AND DROP A STAPLER ON YOUR FOOT? BETTER YET, WHY DON'T I JUST BREAK YOUR LEG SO YOU CAN IDENTIFY WITH SEABISCUIT A LIL BETTER? YOU'VE GOT SEVERAL THINGS IN COMMON ALREADY: TEETH THAT ARE RATHER LARGE AND DIDN'T YOU GET THE HAIR FROM THAT FABULOUS WEAVE YOU'RE WEARING FROM ONE OF SEABISCUIT'S RELATIVES? WHY WEREN'T YOU MOURNING THE FACT THAT POOR SEABISCUIT'S MOTHER DOESN'T HAVE A MANE ANYMORE? DON'T YOU THINK SHE MIGHT WANT HER TAIL BACK?

Sincerely,

PerfectVerse06

:)