Dr. Phil, as always, you find a great way of saying things. I think Stephen Colbert does it great too. "I don't see race. I know I'm white because..." insert hysterically funny and socially racist thing. What's the phrase about your friends will like you because of your differences, not in spite of them? I think that is a more positive way of saying it than we'll all be color blind and unicorns will poop rainbows.

Colbert for President!!!

http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:A...eTqU2IHezyAizw

http://i15.photobucket.com/albums/a3...nicornpoop.jpg

Have I gone too far? :p

I say "yes," only because I thought that was a rainbow sugar cookie with sugar stars. :eek::o:(

[QUOTE=DrPhil;2118105]True sisterhood is when they notice your "skin color," in addition to the other awesome things, but simply do not discriminate on the basis of "skin color."**

** In this context, intelligent and well-spoken sound more like surprising observations than compliments.



I think the breakdown is that I am a math person, and my strength isn't with words. I (clearly, at least in my head) didn't mean to insult anyone. I apologize if my words didn't work the way I intended.

Don't sweat it. At least in my case I didn't take offense, just agreed with Dr. Phil that there was maybe a better way of phrasing it. Our words never seem to be as ripe for controversy as when talking about race. It seems the only way to avoid the controversy is to avoid the conversation, and I don't like that answer either since without the discussion (and corrections from those more learned than ourselves) we don't grow. God knows I've gotten my foot in my mouth more than once over this topic.

Leaving aside the issue of colorblindness, I think there's a third possibility in between these two alternatives. I think the OP might get a bid, and find that her new sisters are all over the map in how they interact with her. Some may bond with her on a deep level and become her best friends. Some may deliberately seek her out as a companion for selfish reasons, such as to prove how open-minded they are. Some may make well-meaning but ignorant comments that make the OP feel like an outsider. Some may resent her for stealing all the thunder in the pledge class or suspect that she got a leg up because of her color.

The OP might still have a positive experience overall, but she'll encounter some bumps that the white girls in her pledge class won't. Being a trailblazer is never easy.

But this is true for any pledge, to a lesser extreme. Some are going to go out of their way to be your friend, some will be pissed because you took "their girl's" spot, and others will fall somewhere in the middle.

/lane swerve

Leslie....this is one of so many reasons why I love you and am proud to call you friend...

/lane swerve

Yes, that is so, but an insult is going to have a special sting when it's based on your race as opposed to your hometown, or whatever factor might make a white girl that pledge in a Bama chapter. I think it will be both qualitatively and quantitatively different for the first/only black pledge in a chapter.

I'm so glad I could entertain! :D

Well to help I am an AA myself who went through CR (yes I know the difference between formal and cr) for my sorority at an SEC school and always wondered the same thing. I am out of state and did not know anyone or have any family in the state, but I still tried and a proud KD and love it. Sometimes you just have to give it a try and don't feel put down. But grades, resume, and etc. still counts. I never did formal because my school messed up my housing in order to live on campus my first year and yes we did have AA go through recruitment at the my school this fall, so yes it's def worth it. I'm from SC in the deep south so I def understand even though I went to a different SEC school almost 10 hours away.

As long as this has been bumped, I will add this here:

From the Phi Mu FB page:

Congratulations to Alpha Delta [chapter of Phi Mu] collegian Kimbrely Dandridge who was elected as the Associated Student Body President at the University of Mississippi! Kimbrely, a junior studying journalism, is the first African-American female ASB President at Ole Miss.

There's an interview with Kimbrely here about her Phi Mu experience:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dnwyaKmlraA

Ole Miss =/= Bama in this regard.