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-   Sorority Recruitment (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/forumdisplay.php?f=217)
-   -   Recommendation Caution to PNM's (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=53908)

AZTheta 09-28-2010 01:18 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by kfraz811 (Post 1988494)
Thank you. And also I don't know if my University requires recs ( I found a thread on it and they said it wasn't required here). Should I still ask for them anyway? (I'm a freshman now but I think I'm going to rush as a sophpmore because I missed the rush period this year :()
Quote:
Originally Posted by kfraz811 (Post 1988519)
Yea I think I'm going to ask soon about COB because the recruitment this fall ends on sunday. One more question: if I do get recs, should I try to get one for every sorority (theres about 9) or should I just get them from certain sororities that I know I like (I went to recruitment the first few days to visit all the houses, I dropped out before prefs because I had very few houses left to choose from and I knew my chances were very slim to receive a bid at all)
A little conflicting information here. You did start recruitment, but then dropped out because...? What?

kfraz811 09-28-2010 02:13 PM
Yes I did start recruitment. I haven't officially dropped out but I am considering it a lot this week. I might get dropped before this friday or saturday because I haven't had the maximum of houses to visit each day. So i might drop and work on bettering my chances for next year. I haven't quite decided what to do yet. It's a little more complicated than that but I don't want everything public but i can pm if anyone cares to know my other reasons

AZTheta 09-28-2010 02:22 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by kfraz811 (Post 1988542)
Yes I did start recruitment. I haven't officially dropped out but I am considering it a lot this week. I might get dropped before this friday or saturday because I haven't had the maximum of houses to visit each day. So i might drop and work on bettering my chances for next year. I haven't quite decided what to do yet. It's a little more complicated than that but I don't want everything public but i can pm if anyone cares to know my other reasons
Based on what you've shared, I will repeat what we tell PNMs: "it only takes one". Many PNMs do not have the maximum number of invites and are pleased to accept invitations and find their home. Your stated attitude contains lots of "mights" that are negative; you don't know for a fact that you'll be dropped, do you? You are still being invited so clearly there are some chapters who are still interested in you.

Frankly, it seems to be the exception to have the maximum number of invites,rather than the rule, because of the sheer volume of PNMs competing for a limited number of available openings in each chapter. Recruitment is very competitive.

Point of reference: it doesn't come across well when you post information that's not consistent. The impression that I got is that you didn't like your invites. That's my take, based on what you've posted.

kfraz811 09-28-2010 02:30 PM
I didn't intend for it to sound that way. Actually I would be happy in any of the 4 houses that asked me back. They were all at the top of my list. I'm just worried I won't be invited back after philanthropy since my list will be so short and there are so many other pnms rushing this year. I don't know how high my chances are.

Always AlphaGam 09-28-2010 02:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by kfraz811 (Post 1988560)
I didn't intend for it to sound that way. Actually I would be happy in any of the 4 houses that asked me back. They were all at the top of my list. I'm just worried I won't be invited back after philanthropy since my list will be so short and there are so many other pnms rushing this year. I don't know how high my chances are.
Instead of focusing on what you don't have, try to be grateful for the 4 houses that you do have. Think about the PNMs who've already been dropped altogether and those who only have 1 or 2.

AZTheta 09-28-2010 02:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by kfraz811 (Post 1988560)
I didn't intend for it to sound that way. Actually I would be happy in any of the 4 houses that asked me back. They were all at the top of my list. I'm just worried I won't be invited back after philanthropy since my list will be so short and there are so many other pnms rushing this year. I don't know how high my chances are.
You have four invites that are all at the top of your list? You should be ecstatic! Now go have FUN, be confident, and good luck to you.

kfraz811 09-28-2010 03:07 PM
Thanks I am happy with what houses I did get. I'm going to go and have fun and hope I get a bid but if I don't I'm not going to be crushed because I already know ways I can improve my chances for next year. (but if I get in this year that'll be an added bonus ;) )

FSUZeta 09-28-2010 03:52 PM
hope it works out for you!!

nolesgirl 03-10-2011 11:45 AM
hey, i'm new to gc and hoping to rush this year. are we allowed to ask gc members for recs and is that considered okay, or is it more of an annoyance? what do they generally say in the recs?

Drolefille 03-10-2011 11:53 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by nolesgirl (Post 2037399)
hey, i'm new to gc and hoping to rush this year. are we allowed to ask gc members for recs and is that considered okay, or is it more of an annoyance? what do they generally say in the recs?
Just think about this logically, would it make sense for us to write you a recommendation when we don't know you? Read other threads about how to get in touch with people to do recs AFTER checking with every possible person you know in real life.

transfergirrl 03-30-2012 01:12 PM
I'm very confused concerning recommendations. I plan on rushing as a sophomore as I am transferring. I know many girls in sororities at m current school who said they would be happy to write me recommendation. I am unsure if the recommendation must be from an alumnae of the chapter that attended the actual university I plan on rushing at. If I do not know any alumnae, will I be able to contact one in some way? Please help!

ForeverRoses 03-30-2012 01:50 PM
Some orgs require recommendations to come for alumnae, others will allow a collegate member to write one for someone going through recruitment at another school.

Recomendations do not need to come from someone that attended the same school where you are going through recruitment.

Does your hometown have an alumnae panhellenic? If they do, they may be able to put you in contact with women from different groups.

DubaiSis 03-30-2012 02:45 PM
ForeverRoses is right, but I would only use the local Alumnae Panhellenic after you have exhausted EVERY man woman and child you know first. Once you've decided where you're going to school, get the list of participating sororities and start asking everyone you know. The sorority women you know are a great start and some will be able to help you directly or through an introduction to an alumna, but (I think) most sororities don't allow collegiate members to write recs. A few do and that's great, but I wouldn't plan on that helping you get out of this the easy way.

Always AlphaGam 03-30-2012 03:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by DubaiSis (Post 2135757)
, but (I think) most sororities don't allow collegiate members to write recs. A few do and that's great, but I wouldn't plan on that helping you get out of this the easy way.
Off-topic, but I thought it was the other way around? I always thought that the sororities who don't allow collegians to write recs were far less than those who do.

Or maybe I'm just making this up, I don't know. :confused:

FSUZeta 03-30-2012 03:48 PM
i think there is a list somewhere on the sororities that do allow collegians to write recs. and those that don't allow them to.

HCM 04-17-2012 07:51 PM
Just a quick question regarding recommendations as I have no ties or connections to the Greek system. It seems that everyone suggests getting in touch with the local Alumnae Club to meet with women and obtain recommendations, but I cannot seem to find one in the greater Boston area. I was wondering if anyone could help me to find some resources for recommendations in Boston or point me towards any alumnae who would be willing to help me. Thank you so much!

lauralaylin 04-17-2012 08:14 PM
HCM, are you going to school in the Boston area as well? The last I knew (and this info is a few years old, things can change), the Boston Alum Panhellenic was not functioning.

HCM 04-17-2012 08:29 PM
I think you're right that it is no longer functioning. I will actually be going to school in California.

carnation 07-16-2012 09:50 PM
more opinions on recs

ComradesTrue 10-03-2014 02:22 PM
what NOT to do...
 
1. If you are going to be going through an uber competitive recruitment, at a school several states away so you have no internal connections, and an alumna who grew up in that city- and still has connections on that campus- offers to help you, guide you, and write a rec for you the answer is NOT a cocky:

Quote:
"ummm, my brother was in a fraternity** so I already know everything there is to know."
**fraternity was lower tier and on another campus many states away in the other direction

Alumna kindly offered to help you one time in person, and twice via email. You did not respond to either email.

2. Do not contact that same alumna, 6 months later and during the Christmas holidays, and tell her that recs are due in a week so can she get hers in by that time. Providing her with a bulleted LIST of activities ("cheerleading, track, choir") and not an actual resume didn't help your cause.

3. Once you drop out of that recruitment, because, ya know, no recs and all, do not cop the tired attitude of "sororities are SO elitist. How could they know I am not the most special of special snowflakes in only 15 minutes?" (hint: they can't... but the rec that COULD have been sent in 6 months prior might have given them a heads up about you. Or you could have been as rude to them as you were to the alumna who was actually trying to help you and they did learn everything they needed to know in that short 15 minutes.)

4. After not getting your bid do not become the campus alcoholic and tramp, including full documentation of such all over your very public social media. Your campus is not as large as you think it is. They will know.

Because, now that word has gotten back to us that you plan to try to rush again this year we are sitting back with our popcorn. This will NOT turn out well for you.

MaryPoppins 10-03-2014 02:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ComradesTrue (Post 2294866)
1. If you are going to be going through an uber competitive recruitment, at a school several states away so you have no internal connections, and an alumna who grew up in that city- and still has connections on that campus- offers to help you, guide you, and write a rec for you the answer is NOT a cocky:



**fraternity was lower tier and on another campus many states away in the other direction

Alumna kindly offered to help you one time in person, and twice via email. You did not respond to either email.

2. Do not contact that same alumna, 6 months later and during the Christmas holidays, and tell her that recs are due in a week so can she get hers in by that time. Providing her with a bulleted LIST of activities ("cheerleading, track, choir") and not an actual resume didn't help your cause.

3. Once you drop out of that recruitment, because, ya know, no recs and all, do not cop the tired attitude of "sororities are SO elitist. How could they know I am not the most special of special snowflakes in only 15 minutes?" (hint: they can't... but the rec that COULD have been sent in 6 months prior might have given them a heads up about you. Or you could have been as rude to them as you were to the alumna who was actually trying to help you and they did learn everything they needed to know in that short 15 minutes.)

4. After not getting your bid do not become the campus alcoholic and tramp, including full documentation of such all over your very public social media. Your campus is not as large as you think it is. They will know.

Because, now that word has gotten back to us that you plan to try to rush again this year we are sitting back with our popcorn. This will NOT turn out well for you.

Amen, amen, and AMEN Sister!

als463 10-03-2014 03:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ComradesTrue (Post 2294866)
1. If you are going to be going through an uber competitive recruitment, at a school several states away so you have no internal connections, and an alumna who grew up in that city- and still has connections on that campus- offers to help you, guide you, and write a rec for you the answer is NOT a cocky:



**fraternity was lower tier and on another campus many states away in the other direction

Alumna kindly offered to help you one time in person, and twice via email. You did not respond to either email.

2. Do not contact that same alumna, 6 months later and during the Christmas holidays, and tell her that recs are due in a week so can she get hers in by that time. Providing her with a bulleted LIST of activities ("cheerleading, track, choir") and not an actual resume didn't help your cause.

3. Once you drop out of that recruitment, because, ya know, no recs and all, do not cop the tired attitude of "sororities are SO elitist. How could they know I am not the most special of special snowflakes in only 15 minutes?" (hint: they can't... but the rec that COULD have been sent in 6 months prior might have given them a heads up about you. Or you could have been as rude to them as you were to the alumna who was actually trying to help you and they did learn everything they needed to know in that short 15 minutes.)

4. After not getting your bid do not become the campus alcoholic and tramp, including full documentation of such all over your very public social media. Your campus is not as large as you think it is. They will know.

Because, now that word has gotten back to us that you plan to try to rush again this year we are sitting back with our popcorn. This will NOT turn out well for you.
As I'm sure you realize, it shouldn't have to be said but, I will say it: Please keep us posted on Special Snowflake. We love a good story over here on GC. Haha! Geez! I can't believe someone would act so horribly. You are much kinder than you really needed to be by offering up help various times. Good for you. Yes, please keep us posted.

33girl 10-03-2014 04:31 PM
Unless brother's fraternity was called I Am Justin Timberlake and Have Money I Don't Want, she was dead in the water before the end of #1.

amIblue? 10-03-2014 05:13 PM
I feel confident that the PNM in question will get a bid from Gamma Delta Iota.

ASTalumna06 10-03-2014 08:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by amIblue? (Post 2294887)
I feel confident that the PNM in question will get a bid from Gamma Delta Iota.
Don't forget about Sigma Omicron Lambda! She definitely has a chance there, too.

als463 10-04-2014 08:06 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ASTalumna06 (Post 2294901)
Don't forget about Sigma Omicron Lambda! She definitely has a chance there, too.
I just got that. I see what you did there. Clever!

amIblue? 10-04-2014 09:36 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ASTalumna06 (Post 2294901)
Don't forget about Sigma Omicron Lambda! She definitely has a chance there, too.
Lol


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