AT&T: We drop your calls, we screw up your iPhone and you will still pay for our services. We put you second.




Amazon

PS3 - why buy this when you can buy a real PC for the same price? Oh! and did you know you can play Blu Ray movies on? 6 out 10 consumers didn't ! PS3, buy us because you know the Sony name!









Water

GRrrrrr......


Xbox 360 - When having a Vista Machine messing up your life just won't do...play your games and download some overpriced movies here and run it thru your crappy Vista Media Center. Xbox 360 changing the way you watch TV and put money in Bill's pocket.






Timberland

Timberland : Buy these expensive work or hiking boots and then make sure to never get them dirty (or take off the tag)



TiVO

Don't waste your life on a Network schedule - waste your life on your own schedule.





coffee

Coffee: Sleep is over-rated.



Chai Tea

Sounds exotic, tastes good but in the end...it's just tea.






MLB Baseball

MLB: When you care enough to take the very best HGH.




Hello Kitty

Hello Kitty: For those with too much money and not enough sense.

or

Hello Kitty: For when you want to look like a deranged three-year old.





Dr. Scholls

Dr. Scholls: Keeping your feet calloused for over two generations!




Baby Powder:

Trusted for generations as the essential "pimp slap" tool...OH yeahhhh. You'll get yo' money



Slinky

A tangled bunch of mess that does't do what is on the commercials.


Olive Garden

When you REALLY wanna break a diet, do it with our carb-licious bread and pasta fest!



Barnes and Noble

Barnes and Noble: Putting quaint corner bookstores out of business all over the country!



Oil of Olay

Oil of Olay - No matter how much you slop on, you will still have crow's feet in the morning.








KY Jelly