I have an unhappy update to my little sister's rush experience at Auburn.

First, I wouldn't take your daughter being cut as any reflection on her character/likeability/etc. AT ALL, especially after the people I know who have been cut this week by various sororities. Second, being in a sorority is not the be all and end all thing of all things. Your daughter can have a great collegiate experiance whether or not she pledges and definitely shouldn't just pledge any group that offers her a bid if the only reason is just so she can be in a sorority. That is a recipie for disaster, trust me.

On to my not-so-happy story and hopefully this will make you feel a little better about your daughter. I can't/won't re-write my earlier novel/post, so please reference that for any background. LOL My sister got cut from Sorority C today. Obviously, I was not pleased to say the least. I really can't understand what is going on at Auburn this week based on some of the things I've heard.

To give my sorority, along with the others, the benefit of the doubt - Auburn must have the most outstanding group of rushees ever to step foot on that campus. I say this because of the amazing credentials my sister, along with her best friend have, and the sororities they were cut by. Both had a 4.0, were involved in practically every activity possible in high school, great personalities, and very attractive (i know this shouldn't matter, so plz no one post a question asking me why i noted this). Today, the best friend was cut by Sorority A, which her sister was an active member of just last year. **I have no knowledge of "sister's" standing, etc. in Sorority A when she graduated, so for all I know "sister" could have been a negative** However, remember that best friend was also cut by Sorority C the first day. My sister was also cut by A today, along with several others. I believe she said she has 5 left, one being Sorority B, which is also the only one she said she would even consider accepting a bid from anyway and she's not even sure of that. On a good note, best friend was also kept by B today and they are hoping to get to return together tomorrow, but who knows at this point.

I can assure you that from what I have been told, 4.0 GPA's can't be what all of the sororities are looking for b/c they are cutting people left and right with perfect GPA's and high ACT scores, not to mention legacies. According to my sister, there has been a mass exodus of girls from rush as of this afternoon from what she can tell. Since I am a little confused, to say the least, at some of these developments, I asked her about the girls who have been kept by Sororities A & C. She said she knows NONE. Now, obviously there have been many girls kept by these groups, but she is as confused as I am about what's going on, if not more.

I'm beginning to wonder if this may be one of those years where many sororities "screw themselves." What I mean by this is that I think some groups may have been a little too confident about which girls they may have had in their "back pocket," so to speak, and were a little too loose with the early cuts of girls who they may now wish they could have back. Of course, this may not be the case at all, just one of the few things I can think of to rationalize the things I am hearing. As others have said, there are a lot of things that go into deciding who to keep and who to cut that are private and known only to each sorority, so there are other things that may add to my unhappiness that I won't mention.

And also to keep in mind that with release figures, most sororities are given a target number of PNM that they can invite back each round... so while there might have been 1,000 perfect PNM's who ABC thought would be amazing additions to their sisterhood, if ABC can only invite 400 back to the next round, then 600 amazing women are being cut from that group's invite list... :o

(On the flip side, I know that means that if ABC can only take 70 women, then it's a good thing that all of those women aren't getting their hopes up only to go bidless on bid day... but I can only imagine how much it hurts in the meantime...)

Don't Rush To Judgement
 

I also have a daughter at Auburn who is rushing this year. Her experience has been a good one so far. She has not spoken of a "mass exodus" but has mentioned only one of her group that has left rush. This is to be expected. The reason being was that this particular girl was cut by the only sororities she would consider joining. My daughter has kept an open mind throughout this process and while she was cut by some of her top choices, she said she would be very happy at any of the six that she visited today. I asked her how she would feel if she got a bid from her last choice and she said she would be truly happy because she has met people in each one that she likes and she has found characteristics in each sorority that she likes. Yes, the girls that are getting cut are fantastic girls by any measure, and many sororities around the US would gladly have them! But Auburn only has 16 sororities for a very large student population so the competition is strong. There is no easy answer except to know that Auburn isn't all about being part of the Greek system and if you aren't a part of it you will still have a fantastic collegiate experience! Greek is not 'life' at Auburn, and all of these girls will hit the ground running come Aug 16!

First and foremost, Elaine, I am sorry that your sister was cut from your legacy sorority (that has got to be tough); hopefully, with her attending 5 parties today, one of the those sororities will work out for her.

I talked to Kate tonight. She is fine and still having a good time (I feel guilty even telling you all this as I feel so bad for Elaine's sister and Momto2Gals daughter).

Tonight after they finished their skit parties, they ranked the sororities that they attended in order of their preference for pref day. Tomorrow they meet right before the first pref parties to get their list. They will attend up to 3 pref parties tomorrow.

Kate has a definite favorite at this time and we're both hoping that she is invited back to that one tomorrow! Other then her definite favorite, she liked 5 out of the 6 sororities she attended today and said she could see herself fitting into any of them.

Even though Kate's rush is going well, I continue to stress about it and I think Carnation's comments about how a mother feels about her daughter's rush is so accurate.

I should know by noon tomorrow, I'll update then.....

Just talked to my daughter on the phone
 

She said of the two parties she went to today she is very thrilled with one of the sororities and is really hoping on a pref invite and and a bid from them. The other one is "OK" with her she said she would probobly be happy there too. She isn't as upset as she was first of the week when some of the favorites cut her. Also she said that a LOT of girls are being cut from sororities that they really wanted and a lot have dropped out of rush because of this (like 200 I think she said) but she said if she gets a knock on her door tomorrow morning she will be in tears because that will mean that she didn't get any invites to any pref parties. I just think the whole system is messed up and I don't understand why you HAVE to have a 4.0 or be a "pageant winner" to be considered by sororities. That is not exactly what it is supposed to be about, is it? I am starting to wonder if maybe she has gone to the wrong school. But if she gets an invite from that one sorority and a bid from them it will all work out I think.

i shouldn't have used the phrase "mass exodus." i apologize. she mentioned that she believed many girls were done after today based on either not having any more options or choosing not to continue with the options they had remaining. sorry about that.

imo, we shouldn't paint a picture of rush being made up ONLY of young women with perfect gpa's and resumes, "pageant title" winners, saints, etc, b/c most of the people here know that's pretty ridiculous. of course there are a tremendous number of girls going through rush who are several of these things, although i doubt any saints, but i would seriously question anyone who was a member of a sorority at a school similar to auburn and will not admit that there will be girls who are given bids on monday who......let's see how to say this......wouldn't win a resume or even personality contest with many of the girls who were cut. i'm not trying to imply that this isn't a sorority's choice, but i do think its a little unfair to paint a picture of a group made up of ALL perfect young women in EVERY way and this is the sole reason great girls get cut. i realize i'm about to get totally bashed, but i just felt i needed to say this.

It only takes one. One group that you like, one party you go to and one bid to accept. Don't worry about numbers and who's doing what. Just be happy with ONE.

But the girls going through at Auburn aren't a representative sample of young women, or even young women at Auburn. They're a group of people who self-selected to be part of this system. For the most part they have 3.5+ GPA coming out of high school and a lot of activities. Because they've heard how competitive recruitment is, they will be presenting themselves physically as well as they can with great clothes, hair, etc.

Sure on bid day, some girls with bids won't be any "better" than some girls who got cut or dropped out. But the girls who got bids may have known young women in the groups before recruitment even started, have more influential home town connections, better recs, whatever. They may have been picked up and shown around by members who were better at drawing them out and held more positive influence in the group. Who knows?

Don't drive yourself crazy with the junk you can't control.

It's an SEC recruitment. It is what it is.

Also, you have to keep in mind that during round 1, they have 25 minutes to make an impression. During that time, they meet a limited number of members. If they meet 5 women in 25 minutes, they still only met 3% of a chapter of 150 members. As I said earlier, with groups the size of the groups at Auburn, it's likely that any young woman would find a niche within any of the groups, it's also likely that those aren't the members that they end up meeting in those 25 minutes. The most intelligent, personable, and beautiful woman isn't going to "click" with each of the 150-200 members of a chapter. In a way, it's luck of the draw on who they meet and converse with for those first couple parties. Also, these sorority women are meeting so many PNMs in a short period of time with little time to get to know them, so even the most ideal PNM could get lost in the shuffle. There can be name mix ups, rushers who forget who was who, who were so nervous themselves that they got confused, etc. It's total chaos for them too. It's also nerve wracking for them.

When you add in release figures, cuts will be heavy earlier in the process than in the past. However, there are fewer disappointments during that last round and on bid day, because the chapters kept inviting the women that they really really wanted. If you have to cut 50-60% of the women who attended your parties, that can be a whole lot of women. In the end, if there are 16 chapters, each chapter can only take 6% of the PNMs. So, 94% essentially end up cut from (or PNMs have chosen to cut) each chapter by the time all is said and done on bid day. I can see how women can end up disappointed that way.

I agree 100% with what you are saying. It's unfair and somewhat rude to act as if the reason a girl wasn't given a bid or invite back if because everyone else "out did" her or is just marvelous. This is Auburn. Yes, it is a good school but it is not Harvard. I am sure the majority of girls going through had good grades and activities but...I'm sure there are many who on the more average side, and I'll ditto that for similar schools. I know MANY girls who went through rush at similar schools who did NOT have the stellar GPAs, activities, and perhaps personalities that GCers are speaking of. And guess what? These girls got bids. So, I'm a bit baffled by the idea that all these PNMs are knockouts. I don't know the reason wonderful girls are cut at Auburn. It may just be a fluke, or perhaps they didn't know the girl well enough. But I can't deny that knowing girls my age, some of these reasons ARE shallow. Let's not sugarcoat it.

Actually, the things you have said are the EXACT things I have been telling my sister, however, my sister isn't on this message board and this is a thread about the progression of the Auburn recruitment process this year, not a "rah, rah" thread. I am expressing MY feelings about what has been going on, NOT my sister's. Actually, I shouldn't use the word "expressing" and probably use "venting" to more acurately describe what I am doing. I'm sorry if you misunderstood or thought I was posting a transcript of my conversations with my sister, because that couldn't be farther from the truth. I'm not sure if you have read this entire thread or just based your comments on my one post, but I assure you I am very aware of SEC recruitment and all that comes along with it. I also assure you that I wouldn't be on this board if I didn't love my sister and want the very best for her. I know the very best thing for her concerning rush is for me to use this board as an outlet for my frustrations and save my "rah, rah" speeches for my conversations with her. I appreciate your extreme positivity, but I think you should probably use it to encourage the people in this thread who really don't know what this process is all about.

Non Greek Organizations
 

My daughter is already looking forward to all of the other non Greek organizations that she can join at Auburn. I am hoping that she will not be let down in those areas also as she is wanting to be very involved. She has a lot to offer in any organization really. I am wondering if she doesn't get a bid this week if once she joins some of those other organizations and gets active on campus the sororities will see what they missed by chosing her and she will get a bid later on because they will see that she could be a valuable member to them. I realize of course though that the quota thing may keep them from being able to offer her a bid. I believe that Auburn needs more sororities so that more girls will get a chance to join. What is y'alls feelings on that?
P.S. Holding my breath here until about 9:00 am when I call her to see what happens today!
Let's just say she gets invited back to those two parties today, what are her chances of getting a bid?
She said she talked to a lot more girls at each party yesterday and they were taking her around the room repeating her name over and over. Is that a good sign? She said that she TOLD them she really loved their sorority and felt like she fit in and was at home with them. Will they remember that?

Good luck to all of your daughters!!

This has been discussed a lot about Ole Miss and Alabama on this board, who rival Auburn in the "competitive" category. The reality is, there are enough spots for every woman who goes through recruitment if the women are willing to join any chapter. The stories we're hearing here aren't that women are cut from every chapter, but that they are upset after getting cut from their favorites or their legacy chapter. The addition of a new group doesn't prevent this. In fact, if you take the same number of PNMs and divide them among one additional group, that means that the most popular groups can take FEWER women. Many of the women going into recruitment at these schools ONLY want to be in what is considered the "top tier" sororities. You'll hear them talk about "old row" chapters being most desirable and being unwilling to join any other chapter. They also tend to look down on the smallest chapter as being undesirable. Yet, if that smallest chapter (at any school, really) took quota, the whole face of the chapter can change with that new member class.

Bottom line: It isn't that there aren't enough spots for all the women. The way quota is determined creates spots for all the women going through. Whether they can get into what they consider "THE sorority" is another story...