Originally Posted by AKA_Monet (Post 1765181)

To be honest, I have not chosen to follow what you have been saying because I don't get into that logic. However, I was very impressed with KSigRC last comment, which I positively commented on.

When you pronounced that you do not understand the difference and preciousjeni as well as others say, we are not discussing the same thing, the only method we can use to get you to think before you post is something called a "shock and awe" method. Saying something asinine and paradoxical that you HAVE to think to make sense of it. Sometimes is works, sometimes it does not.

Now for some background. DS found the news article from another situation and he posted it over here.

Here is the actual article in Science Magazine. I do not get access to the entire articles anymore, so all I can see are the abstracts. From what I read, they have a rubric as to establish was is a blatant racist act vs. what is not??? IDK? Such as 1:10 times, when someone reports a racist act is it one? IDK? Since I cannot see their results, I cannot discern how they did that or add any professional validity of their methods. Nonetheless it raises the question, what do you do when you see an overtly racist act in this day and age, besides report it?

Overt acts are raising nooses in areas around schools... Outright shooting a black victim while arresting him and he is not resisting... Outright Not selling property to those who can obviously afford it because of their outward appearance... When you are a manger/director/boss and you call any professionally degreed person of color an "affirmative action hire"... To me that is racism...

Originally Posted by preciousjeni (Post 1765187)

I have no idea what keyboard was in use, but here is where the attack began. Whoever was using the keyboard at the time flew off the handle for no apparent reason.

Originally Posted by KSig RC (Post 1765101)

Well, let's try this via analogy . . . do misleading statements or actions constitute fraud?

Well, they could . . . or not. It depends on context, intent, injury, etc.

I'll start there - if that helps eliminate confusion, then we can talk about the rest.

Also - do people really need me to explain why being offended is not disempowering in and of itself? Really? How do you explain stand-up comedy?

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765196)

I do think before I post. The reason I get irritable is that I do not react kindly to being treated like an idiot because I believe in treating people nicely. I am not an idiot and it is frustrating to read that attitude in this post, too. When making a personal post it is helpful to actually read what has been written.

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765196)

I stated that I DID understand the difference. I do. I DO NOT understand the blatant use of slurs (racial, religious, gender-related, etc.) to hurt someone. I understand why people do it. I do not understand the appeal. It's just as sick to do it to a white person as a black person as a hispanic person as an asian person...etc.

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765196)

As to the second part of your post I am forunately rarely in a situation where I experience or witness any truly nasty examples like those you listed. (I haven't in fact witnessed or experienced any of your particular examples, though I have seen things that I feel are blatantly racist). I, like most people, frequently hear slurs. Personally, I attempt to respond in a way that, at the least, prevents the person from doing it in front of me again, but hopefully at least makes them think before they do it at all. That's the best anyone can do. I do not say it to bolster my ego, but because it is an area that I feel strongly about. I believe everyone has some prejudice in some area. That's from personal experience, not statistics. But I believe it.

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765199)

That wasn't an attack.

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet (Post 1765209)

Firstly, I am a strong believer of that people choose the way they want to feel. I admit there are "trigger words" and believe me, I have been triggered... And I cannot tell you how to handle it...

Secondly, people say that because you are a newbie on GC. You came here very opinionated and we never heard of you before or seen you before. So, folks are either whatever or combative. I'd say more of the latter, IMO. Not only do you have to think you should wait, too.

Welcome to the Web 2.0...



I don't understand why people use slurs to describe other people or themselves. I don't see the appeal either. But as a biomedical research scientist, I can guess that on average, aside from the sociological underpinnings, environment and cultural things people do, the reason is also likened to Tourette's Syndrome. People use these profane terms because they realize it is offensive and they are incapable of using any other term and a get a "kick" off of pissing people off. IDK? But, that is what the latest neuropsychatric research with fMRI is suggesting...



You will probably witness a lot more ignorance before you see the end of it. Most people are fearful of those cultures they do not understand or open to. So they say anything harmful.

Overtime the more harmful they get, the more it is enacted upon the "target group". Then the targets fight back and it comes as a shock to a lot of people. The reality is, everyone ignores what happened in the first place and how the deep rooted feelings of ill will germinated and were left to fester...

Eventually, all things end over time. This is just one of those things that are ending...

Originally Posted by preciousjeni (Post 1765213)

Only because in your world, you're right and the rest of us are wrong.


If you're referring to my use of "little girl," that's what I call female children who throw a tantrum. If you act like a child, you'll be addressed like a child.

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765217)

Your beliefs are right for you, not for me. Mine are right for me, not for you.

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765216)

Well, I have to say, thank you for a very civil post.

I guess I fail to see why those who are new are not entitled to strong opinions, but I'll leave it at that.

I agree that sometimes it is shock factor...the difference between understanding why and understanding the rush some people obviously get is the difference between head and heart.

Yes, time does help smooth things over, it's just frustrating to know that I'll probably die before it ends, if it ever does. I'm human. I do tend to judge people by their actions and their words, even though I know it's wrong. What I hope I don't ever judge them by is the things that they are born with...gender, race, sexual orientation, etc.

Originally Posted by preciousjeni (Post 1765221)

Works for me. Would it blow your mind if we shared some beliefs?


Stating an opinion should not necessarily be regarded as an effort to compel others to disregard their own. I disagree with you. That shouldn't be a problem unless you take it personally.


If that's how you feel, go for it. However, if anything is being projected here, it is your own self-importance. You are up-in-arms over what? Your misinterpretation of what I say?

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet (Post 1765222)

@Bolded. It's been a long time. Thanks... Because really, I have not been civil because I have be exhausted in having to prove who and what I am. It is not like it's difficult. I don't really lie, I am bad at it, so I don't do it... Oh well. I might get over it.

I thought the same thing too about new people having strong opinions, but I learned differently when I put myself in that situation and I am 40 years old... Oh well... I might get over that...

Now judgment is given to use to protect ourselves from long ago. Similar to anger as an emotion, judgment is that bridge between emotions and thoughts.

All of these are just emotional responses. Not thoughtful or academic. They are opinions and not informed ones at that...

However, we all use judgment as a quick learning form, i.e. pro vs. con... We judge when the "eye" is hot when we cook, i.e. remember, I know the cook eye is hot, so I will not touch it--that is how we get the logic to not touch it. Discernment is a higher form of judgment to know the difference, IMO. Wisdom is to move beyond that discernment.

In Mindfulness, when you focus on your innermost energy, your mind reels in waves. You are to just notice the stray then breathe to get back to your focus. And if you stray 1000 times, you breathe to get back to your focus 1000 times. Getting angry, frustrated, and bring about a value to your frustration, which is judgment, is not productive.

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765225)

I already explained, and it's pretty obvious, that the lofty "you should be doing this" and "we should be doing that" and "how sad you 'buy into that'" are presumptuous.

Originally Posted by preciousjeni (Post 1765229)

Ok. Another of your opinions.


What names have you been called?

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765232)

Is a "big girl" who calls names behaving like an adult?

(It's a yes or no question).

Originally Posted by LΩVE (Post 1765227)

Your opinion on judgment makes a lot of sense and I guess ot me it is a good way to verbalize exactly why judgment of people is so dangerous, but especially when it's based on something so arbitrary as a skin color or sex.