Ok OK I Got One!
 

Now this was a wedding that I saw the tape of but didn't attend, so I'm going to try and remember the details.

One of my older cousins (on the ghetto side of the family) was getting married for about the 3rd time in 2 years. I don't know why she decided to make a big to-do like she was 25 and tying the knot for the 1st time. The wedding was scheduled to start somewhere around 3, but it didn't get underway until at least 6. My father and uncle walked up the street and got fresh hair cuts and Harold's Chicken while they were waiting. The church was one of those tiny store front churches (w/no air) and it was the middle of the summer, so you know folks were burning up in there.

Anyway, the bridal party arrives around 6 pm. They don't have a professional sound system in the church, so the bride's son is in the back of the church w/a bomb box and a stack of CDs trying to make something happen. The minister comes in dressed like a Catholic Bishop, complete w/the tall hat, long robes, and staff.:eek: . Then he gets to praying in this high-pitched, wining (sp?)/singing type of voice. He sings the prayer for about 10 min. So they stumble through the remainder of the ceremony pretty uneventfully, and everything is going alright...until the reception.

They had rented a car instead of a limo (but I'll allow that b/c they don't have alot of money). How come, half way through the ceremony my cousin "Bug" ( I swear to God, I don't know what his real name is.), says he's going to go fill up the gas tank on the rental car an COME RIGHT BACK! No one saw or heard hear from him for the rest of the night. My dad had to drive the bride and groom to the reception in his car. The reception was at the bride's mom's place...but they stay in a teeny, tiny 2-bedroom apt. in the ghetto. Now given that your place isn't that hot to begin with, I would think that you would at least clean up, right. Wrong! This place was full of clutter, like it was any old day of the week. To top it all off the bride's mom cooked like it was a regular family get together (meaning you roll through the kitchen and fix your own damn plate, and all the food is still sitting in the pot on the stove).

Yeah...gotta love "the other side" of the family.

No chittlin's but close.....

They had a "decent" menu
ham, fried chicken, swedish meatballs, mashed potatoes with a type of chicken broth gravy,mac-n-cheese, green beans, rolls, spaghetti salad, jello, RED punch (it was a powdery/icy blue-creme wedding) and cake....... :rolleyes:

Yall when she came out **thread hijack***

HC, my mouth flew open and LOUDLY said EWWW lol
HC, the daddy AND bride was bouncin' yes bouncin' down the aisle?
HC, eeeerbody (in my ghetto voice) in the groom's party had braids

HC, they performed a salute (like the military does with swords) with their flowers and hands?
HC, the dresses were pretty but the flowers were not? Looks like SOMEbody went to the Dollar Tree....:o

***now we're back to our regularly scheduled thread*****:D

BTW, I don't know how to post a picture when you don't have it on a website.....:confused:

Re: Re: Thanks to TooCute. . .
 

Why does that you like Atlantic Ave in Brooklyn?:eek:

RE: picture outside of White Castle...I don't think that is the one on Atlantic Ave...In any case count from the right-skip the group of guys...the bride is the second female from the left (standing next to woman in capri pants and backpack)....at least that looks like a veil to me...

As for ghetto wedding stories...I was in one 2 weeks ago...my cousin was the bride (hereafter referred to as bridezilla). Here are a couple of the lowllights...

-we (bridal party) arrive 2:30 pm (for a 2 o'clock wedding), groom arrives at 3pm-service still can't start because officiant (grooms brother in law) STILL hasn't arrived!!! :mad: and when he does at 3:30pm he isn't even dressed!! (now he had to drive 6 hours from his house to get here - at some point you KNEW you wouldn't be in NY at 2pm-CALL COLLECT-say something!!)

-Wedding ceremony was over in 10 minutes because we had to be out of the space at 4pm sharp!! After I mention this is crazy after all this money wasted the ceremony was so short and rushed why did MOH tell me the bride and groom were married 2 days ago and this is just for show because BIL isn't licensed to perform ceremony in NY (so why in hades did we have to wait??!!):confused: ESPECIALLY since he didn't attend the rehearsal and had placed himself exactly opposite of how we had rehearsed.

-all along we were told the grooms friend who is a photographer was supposed to take pictures-after the rushed ceremony a man with a camera strapped on his shoulder (who didn't show up at brides house for any of the before pictures) made a big deal of grouping us together and then pulled out a disposable camera-with my fourth nerve throbbing I ask where the devil is the real photographer?? It takes a minute before we realize this is the so-called photographer who weakly responded "Well I don't know how to use this other camera!"-he carried THE GROOMS Cannon 35mm camera (not automatic-a professional one you have to load) around the rest of the day-he clicked..sometimes the flash went off, most times it didn't...not sure if any pictures came out...

-Reception that was suppossed to start at 4pm STILL doesn't start until 6pm because no one bothered to check that the oven at the hall was not available for use-so food had to be taken back home to recook in oven...(instead of taking care of stuff at the hall all the "helpers" were at the site because they all had to see the wedding and didn't bother to mention that none of the hot food was heated)

-cake arrived from bakery at 5:30....

- bridezilla had to open cards in the bathroom looking for cash to pay the dj (when I suggested she write the amounts on the envelopes so she can send thank you cards she asked me "why do I have to send thank you cards?" :rolleyes: -not holding breath for that one)- I had three nerves left at this point....

-at 8:10 when I tell bridezilla that we have to wrap it up she still doesn't comprehend that we only have space until 9pm-that means everything has to be out at 9pm so unless you are going to pay money for additional time you have to get out-they don't care that you've only had a 2 hour reception...she starts to open the champaign bottles because "we have to drink it now".....I grab a bottle and stop myself from hitting her....tell her to take the damn bottles home and bathe in them-I don't care...but move out of the way, stop opening bottles so we can pack up this stuff and get out of here...two nerves left.... she gets mad at me and stomps outside....I over hear her making plans to meet her girls at the local club later that nite

I knew it would be ghetto from the start...just not THIS ghetto.....its hard being the ebony sheep in the family.;)

TOO.

DAYUM.

FUNNY.

You know that your at a "ghetto" wedding if...

...Your invitation arrives 4 days before the wedding...The programs weren't there yet. When they got there, you had to beg the hostess to give you one...The usher didn't know which side of the church was the Bride's or Groom's...The wedding started an hour after the time on the invitation...There were visible safety pins in the bridesmaid's dresses...A groomsman had his tux leg rolled up...A bridesmaid answered a cellular phone during the ceremony...The unity candles won't light...The preacher's beeper goes off. 10. The vocalist didn't know the words to the songs...The parents of the Bride or Groom were under 30 years old...The Bride's hair had grown 14 inches in a week...A member of the wedding party was wearing sunglasses...There were more than 40 people in the wedding party...The mother of the Groom had her shoes off during the ceremony...The Bride was given away by her 8 year old uncle...The happy couple already had kids; and most of them were in the wedding...Music by Luther, Diana Ross, Lionel Richie was played at the reception...The communion "wine" was Asti Spumante...The entertainers from the bachelor party were in the audience...The couples first dance was to a song by "Puff Daddy."...The "ELETRICK SLIDE" was played at least five times...The wedding cake came from SAM'S CLUB...The lady serving the punch advised you to keep your cup...The tuna fish and pimento cheese sandwiches were rationed...You saw groomsmen making trips to 7-11 and KFC to restock the buffet...At least one fight broke out (usually the bridesmaids fighting over the bouquet)...The best man did the toast, but called the Bride by the wrong name. 29. The DJ had an entourage of 8 or more people...The photographer took 1,762,491 pictures (and none of them came out right)...The Bride & Groom rode off standing up in the limousine's sun roof...The bridesmaids have their hair colored to match their dresses...The groomsmen have more than 5 gold teeth in their mouths. 34. The DJ is caught in the kitchen trying to make a plate. 35. Mama and 'em bust out the "Reynolds Wrap" to take a plate home (why do we call it Reynolds Wrap when we buy the generic brand)...The bride is "Backin' That Thing Up" with the grooms father...The bride can be seen with dollar bills safety pinned to her wedding dress...The groomsmen take pictures that resemble a recent issue of Vibe magazine.

sorry to crash your thread...
 

:eek: :eek: :eek:

if you don't mind my asking, how old were the bride and the groom???

For more bad wedding stories (though quite frankly they don't quite amount to much compared to the stories here...)

Go to this site:

Tacky Wedding Stories

TooCute sent this to me
 

so...is this a real bride or was this some wedding idea? either way, it's unbelievably gauche:rolleyes:

The other side of the coin...
 

Of course, the other side of the ghetto wedding...is the redneck wedding. Opposites you may say, but eerily similar.

You may be at a redneck wedding/reception if:

-Bikers driving by see all the bikes outside and decide to come on in, wearing full leather.

-There is karaoke to "Forever and Ever Amen" sung DURING THE CEREMONY.

-At the reception, people change from their formal clothes to jeans or sweats. Personal fave: the teenage boy wearing a shirt that says "tickle this Elmo."

-There are firehoses and boots in plain view.

-If you spill a drink, the lady in the kitchen gives you a mop to clean it up yourself.

-The bridal party has all dated each other at some point in high school.

-If you get your bridesmaids or mother of the bride dresses from anyplace other than the JC Penney prom catalog, you are just too full of yourself and "citified."

-People only dance to the country tunes, not the "dance" music.

I wish I could've gone...
 

a friend of mine's friend recently wed and after hearing about her invitation and registry, i really wish i could have gone...

#1--apparantly this girl was trying to save money because one side of her invitations had the invite info, the other side had the wedding program, complete with misspelled words. (i.e., "bring your owen bottle"). even the bride's mother's name was misspelled.

#2--why is the wedding b.y.o.b.????

#3--this girl's registry was...what is the word...GHETTO!!!!. some of the items she registered for were...

- toilet paper
- a case of dove soap
- orange juice
- a case of beer

i mean, this just doesn't make any sense!!!!!

Re: I wish I could've gone...
 

OJ?!?!?!??!?! Really?

Re: Re: I wish I could've gone...
 

yep. and i forgot to add metabolife also

Re: I wish I could've gone...
 

aaaaaaaaaaw hell 2 da naw; that ain't wedding registry, that is a GROCERY LIST!!! :o :o :o :o :o

Damn... described my cousin's wedding to a T... almost







































j/k

But I have been to some that fit the description.

Re: TooCute sent this to me
 

I hope my girl don't plan on wearing this to our wedding....

TTT
Best thread EVER:D

pushing up, per LBF's instructions to "revive a dead thread."

Re: I wish I could've gone...
 

Did she have glue sticks, too?

Re: TooCute sent this to me
 

That. Is. So. Unrefined. How. Ghettois.

Since ya'll revived the thread thought I'd update ya...married July 03 the happy couple is now separated...bride found out groom was cheating on her New Years Day (04)...gave him a black eye & moved out in March(still don't know what took so long). As of this month they are currently "dating" to see if they can work it out!! All of this drama before hitting the one year mark. :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :eek:

LAWD that is a dayum shame!!

stardusttwin,
the best part was your continuing narration of your deteriorating nerves dealing with this :D

although it's not quite GWS material, I was talking with someone yesterday who said that during her wedding reception her veil briefly caught on fire after touching one of the candles on the head table. :D

"the bride, the bride, the bride is on fire, she don't need no water... ;)"

hands down, this is the BEST thread in Greekchat.

Tony, have you made it to the basket yet? If not, you've just earned your boarding pass. :p :p :p

OH LAWD, LMAO!!!!

while this story isn't a ghetto wedding story, it is a case of bridezilla.

my cousin got married this weekend and it was a beautiful wedding. however, she did a few things that made my other cousins want to kill her. she called up every guest a few days before the wedding and told them what time they needed to leave their house to get to the place the wedding was at on time. even though she did this, on the invitation she called for the wedding to start at 7pm when it wasn't supposed to start until 7:30pm. she planned out the music the dj was supposed to play for the entire night, he was not allowed to deviate from her list. if someone requested a song he was told to run it by her and she would decide if he could play it or not. she basically just drove everyone crazy in the past few months prior to it.

This is a MAJOR pet peeve of mine...if you want it to start at 7:30 put 7:30 on the invite- be on time and any late comers will miss the ceremony. Its not fair for those who are used to being on time for things to have to sit around waiting for all the "1/2 hour rule followers" (well it says 7 so it won't start til 7:30...I'll go get my nails done at 6 and still make it on time...:rolleyes: )

Tony...she almost shredded the last nerve when she told me they were dating this weekend...I just pretend I'm deaf and dumb and shake my head when she talks. Anything I say goes in one ear and right out the other.. so I've flown the white flag...I just give up.

You are better than me. Although I thoroughly enjoyed your narration, if it was me, I would have hurt her. I'm thinking the breaking point for me would have been bathroom accounting. Although, the "photographer" would have received a very loud, "Aww hell naw!! If it was gonna be like this, Lil Man Man could've taken pictures."

This thread had me cracking up!

I went to a Redneck wedding about a year ago. It was my best friend's cousin's wedding. My friend wasn't dating anyone at the time and didn't want to go to her redneck family's function alone. I got to go with her. Lucky me. :)

For starters, the bride bought her dress in a cream color. She thought the dress was white because the store lighting was dim (notice: she got her dress at a Goodwill type place). Anyway, she threw the dress in her washing machine with some Clorox to bleach the dress back to white. :eek: The dress ended up all splotchy. To top it off, she REEKED of bleach.

The ceremony took place in a beautiful park on a wooded bridge. The only problem was that they didn't want to pay for some fold-up chairs so we could all sit. We stood on a shakey wooden bridge for the whole ceremony. The park is located right by an airport. We couldn't hear the bride and groom saying their vows because the airplanes were flying overhead the whole time. The "VROOOOOOOOOOOOM" sound drowned out the whole ceremony. Luckily, the ceremony was only 15 minutes long since the priest had another wedding ceremony to perform that day.

The reception was held at a decent restaurant. I'll give them that. :) Except, there was no wedding cake, no throwing of the bouquet, and no dance floor for the bride and groom's first dance.

The best man got really drunk off of Arbor Mist (the only alcoholic beverage provided). He stood up and said, "Finally, these two have exchanged vows and can now get in the sack. (snicker)" The bride's family were devout Baptists. The look on their faces was priceless. You could have heard a pin drop in that room after his speech.

ROTFL!!!! :D :D

Yeah..that was a makeshift wedding for real! :D

I have a story that tops them all. When my cousin got married his babies momas got in to it at the wedding, there was a shoot out at the reception, and while tryin not to get shotmy cousin the groom gets hit by a car wich his brother is driving. It was horrible. I'm glad I wasn't there.

i think i am about to be IN a ghetto wedding. My best friend and roomate (from an earlier post) is getting hitched in July. Our other roomie is also in the wedding party, and this trick is refusing to get her bridesmaid dress altered. :confused: I told her she ain't gonna be standing there next to ME looking a mess - get that sh*t fixed.

dang! That sounds like a scene from a black movie.

The dress... http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/eek7.gif but look at the man's expression..Priceless.
ETA:
A pretty woman can't save an UGLY dress!


http://www.sororityluncheon.com/phot...ge/image47.jpg

*Not Ghetto*

but this is where I found the dress..Taylor'd. The only link that works is the Photos.

I think #20 is even worse!!

I peeped at #20 and all I could think of was Wonder Woman!! *now humming Wonder Woman theme song* LOL!

The expressions on the face of the guy in the front row are really priceless. There are some beautiful dresses, but some of the tattoos just detract from that. Personal bias of mine I guess.

Not feeling the shoes on #38

Pictures 65-68...you know she is naming off GCers to climb in that handbasket :o

MMM, MMM, MMM

I dunno if this has been posted here before.

Lawd what is really goin on?

http://www.geocities.com/ghettofabwedding/