Physically, Robert's the only one who does anything for me.

:eek::eek:
Just kidding, if my husband ever bought a pair of jeans to "fit", I seriously would not roll with him :p. I don't want him saggin but just a little room is very neccesary. We lve down South so Tims aren't a big deal but Jordans are.

WE ARE HERE!!! Sag is a bit much to me now, but PLEASE have some room in your pants...call me shallow or whatever, but I briefly dated a guy who wore his pants fitting and it drove me crazy!! That plus his all around "squareness" did that situation in...I need my man to be able to handle himself if something happens to pop off...but not be a thug either...I need a healthy balance...

Okay, because every blue moon I roll where the possibility of something popping off can occur! :D

Y'all are hilarious. Men's pants don't need to be too tight -- I definitely agree with that.

EXACTLY!

Ladies, I never thought I would marry a "Dr."--yes, he is a veterinarian. But I had promised myself NOT to marry a "Dr."--Ph.D., M.D., DDS or both. Ironically, I married a DVM. But we had a lot in common at the right time.

Timing is everything to a man.

My husband was tired of trying to figure what women wanted and he looked like a lighter complexion version of bachelor #1. Then, he had "craters" on his face due to ingrown hairs and poor shaving techniques...

YES, I cleaned that up about the time of our first 2nd wedding (search, I explain somewhere around here).

And search my other posts before 2003, I cried all kinna pink and green tears lamenting my lack of ever finding a mate.

So, I think the issue with these bachelor descriptions are fine including pictures and all. But, really, it does not give you the full flavor and excitement about "being" with that significant other.

Moreover, some ladies here need to know, all men come with idiocrasies. It is a matter of what is your "dealbreaker" and how much you are willing to tolerate and yes, settle.

Actually, let's change that settling word to collaboration--not compromise, but collaboration...

Very well said, Sistergreek AKA_Monet.

LOL! I agree. :)

Age: Ties into the topic
 

So ladies, how much of a compromise is age?

As of late, older men (33-38) have approached me. A lot of these men are really nice too and actually bring a great deal to the table. But then there's the possibility of them having children or being married before. I'm 27, no children, never been married, so I don't know how I feel about getting involved with someone with that history. I've always said that I don't want to play mom to someone else children, especially if the children are with the fathers. Then too I have met a wonderful guys with children but that question keeps popping up in my head. What do you do? :confused:

As long as you aren't old enough to have been a grown man when I was born. That means I wouldn't date men who are almost to 50.

I love men in the 37-43 range. That means you were 7-13 when I was born. :D

Del, we are in the same boat. I think my compromise age range is between 5 to 8 years older. I would even consider going up to 10, but I feel like that's pushing it. I'm weird when it comes down to age!

As for kids, there was a point in time that I said I would never date a man with kids. Then, it seemed as if EVERYONE that I knew and/or met had a kid. There was some sort of baby boom in the late 90s! So, I pretty much decided that I had to get over it and deal with kids. However, as I have broadened my horizons and have met more people, I have come to know that there are still LOTS of guys out there WITHOUT kids.

Being as though I have never had kids of my own, nor do I have experience with a lot of kids, I don't think that I want to date a man with kids. If he was worth it, I would consider it, but I would rather they be small kids. I don't rock too well with juveniles or pre-teens, especially if they have a crazy mother. They are in that age range where their mom can plant wicked things in their head and they can act a fool. And I'm the type of chick that will act crazy right back with them! You can work with and mold toddlers.

Ultimately, my choice is to say no to kids.

This is a very interesting thread and your comments have been thought provoking.

Give me an intelligent, self-sufficient, articulate, and jack of all trades blue collar man any day. My honey is two years older than I am, former military man, has been successfully employed as a mechanic for over 25 years and has a high school diploma. He makes more money than I yet he is more emotionally attuned to me than anyone other men I've dated in the past including college educated men. He has emotionally supported me since I began working on a graduate degree in January 2006. Looks fade overtime and people grow tired of playing games. Yes, my honey wears his work uniform daily yet I know in the evening that he's there with me.

Just my .08 cents.

Chaos and RefinedDiva, I totally agree with your perspectives. My sister and I are seven years apart and we get along very well, so I know that a guy seven or eight years older than me is not too old per se, but 15 years down the road that age gap would be significant! Ultimately, I need to ride the wave and let God show me who He wants me to be with. If he's older, okay. I'll deal with it.

Now, as far as kids are concerned, here's the deal. Y'all please don't laugh or think badly of me, but if guys are 35+ years old and never been married, I start to question his sexuality. I know that's wrong, but that's just the society we live in. It's really sad that women have to think about these things, but I do. I can't wait to hear how you all feel about that. I mean am I the only one that does that?


Mariet, I agree with you 100% as well. Girl, I'd date and marry a man blue collar brotha any day as well. As long as he has goals and knows how to treat a queen, we're good.

I would be thinking the same thing. Maybe not married but to be 35+ and an African American male and to have never been married or have kids just seems rare in this day and age.:confused: