Maybe I am being a little hard, but combining the post about the guys with the other posts, it's just the impression that I get. I hope that she does realize that there's a lot more to being in a sorority than the guys.

I second what 33girl said- if you're unhappy with an aspect, get involved and make the change.

The thing is, all we have is her perception of the situation to go on. She could be in a sorority that's considered "middle tier" or "upper middle tier" but she's unhappy because she's not in the one considered the top of the top.

I haven't seen anything where she says that being in this sorority is adversely effecting her health or self esteem - quite the opposite - I think she thinks she's too good for this sorority.

Is it that easy to change things? If you're in the "fat house" or the "ugly house" or whatever stupid ass thing they call you, or your house is in some way considered lower tier or whatever, how exactly does somebody go about changing that? No matter how much a new member wants things to change, how is she going to make that happen? Are members of XYZ fraternity suddenly going to want to mix with a certain sorority just because somebody asked? It's all well and good to tell someone to change things or to make a difference, but how is she supposed to do that? Let's see some real advice here, not just generalities like "make a change" -- that doesn't mean anything. Tell her HOW.

And let's move these suggestions over to a new thread. It's a good topic and deserves its own place.

Get on Panhel and set up a mixer schedule for all the sororities and fraternities so that everyone mixes with everyone (instead of the same people just mixing w/ each other all the time).

Make it known that you want to broaden your horizons - go to different fraternities' parties. Socialize with members of those fraternities in your classes and elsewhere.

Tell your sisters to get the sticks out of their butts and go someplace other than the "safe" fraternity.

Really reevaluate who your social chair is. Pick her because guys like her...not because the sisters like her...because the two aren't always the same.

I would have written all this out in my previous post but I hate super long posts and I had people waiting for checks. :)

Oh and another thing...

I definitely wasn't in the "top tier" sorority. We didn't have as many mixers, overall, as I would have liked. We didn't have all the fraternities fighting over us to be their float partners. AND YES SOMETIMES THAT REALLY SUCKED.

But being in that top sorority has its own set of headaches and pressures, and if I had to put them up against "OMG we didn't get to mix with Sigma Chi every other week" I would definitely take the problems we had.

It's all in what YOU want out of a sorority. I mean, if your main priority is to meet hot guys and the group you're in isn't enabling you to do that and you don't see it changing nor will you try to make it change...yeah you should probably quit so you're not miserable or making others around you miserable.

The OP originally said she couldn't see herself fitting in with the sisters...then she flips the script and tells us the real reason is because her social opportunities aren't what she would like them to be. If she went into rush with that blatant of a social climbing attitude...well, um, I think you know where I'm going with this.

I guess I can't see it from this poster's POV...

I don't think I could even tell you who was the "cool" fraternities.... To me, being in a sorority was all about the sorority, and I didn't even think about the fraternities when I joined. Also, I think 70% of the girls wearing fraternity letters around campus were GDI's.

I thank God I didn't go to this kind of school. Seventh grade wasn't fun the first time.

I pledged a house that was the BOTTOM house at our school. Yes, bottom. At this school in question (and a number of others), we are somewhere in the upper tier so joining a "top" house doesn't really matter much after the four years are up. But I didn't care, then again I still don't. I had a great time, at great mixers and met great guys. And even better women.

We had a reputation of being dull, fat and ugly. I always looked at it as "yes, none of us are stick thin, and no we aren't beauty queens, but no way in hell are we DULL"........lol

And hot guys are in no way all they're cracked up to be. Usually they know they're hot and usually you aren't the only one telling them.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you might as well just stay right where you are because there are too many sorority members on GC for your comments not to make it to the USC chapters if you do rush again.

Joining because of the men is not a quality most of us look for.......

fighton,

I know what you're trying to say re: tiers and social opportunities.

To everyone else, USC is HARSH socially. It just IS. Its not that lower tier houses have less opportunites, sometimes they have NONE and often they hear the fraternities making cracks about them without even trying to be discreet. And repuatations at USC do not change overnight, if at all.

That said, I can hazard a guess as to which house you may be in, fighton, and in my experience, they had one of the best sisterhoods on the row, social opportunities or no social opportunities.

Amy

And BTW, I do not know a single USC sorority woman who has not had the WHAT IF discussion with her friends from time to time. The houses there, regardless of their on campus rep, are all so strong, and each chapter has such distinct personalities, its hard not to think... how would my experience have been different if I'd chosen another house.

These are good ideas, but I think that at certain schools with a certain social climate, it's not going to happen. Aren't there some fraternities at some schools where members just WILL NOT mix with some sororities, period?

YES and this is how it is at SC. But the thing is too, the fraternities that DO want to mix w the lower tier-- well let's put it this way-- ALL the USC sorority women are pretty and together. You can't really say the same thing for the lower tier fraternities. So it goes both ways, you know? Its hard for a chapter of 120+ women to have a mixer with a house with 30 guys.

Yes.

Even if you set up a schedule, you can't make them show up.

I'm not sure what it's like at USC, but from my experience, and from the experiences of my girlfriends on other big campuses....

By the time you are a junior or a senior people really stop caring about what your specific letters are. If someone wants to take you to a date party and they really like you, they aren't going to be deterred by what your letters are. Most guys can look past your letters if they are genuinely attracted to you.

Maybe your sorority won't get a chance to have a party with xyz fraternity, but do you really want to if they are they have bad attitudes and are so disrespectful to others? I'd rather meet guys outside of the greek system, than meet a guy from the "hot fraternity" who is an a-hole to an entire group of women.

Trust me, long after you've graduated, you probably won't remember much about a mixer or a date party, you will remember the road trips, the vacations, the retreats, the 21st birthdays, and graduation.