LOL!!!! Don't do that to me when I'm at work! My co-workers will think I'm weird for just laughing out of the blue!!! ;)

I think it is one thing to be there for support, and another to track the girl down at her recruitment school and see if you can figure out where she went or if she got cut. People have to be posting on the boards to receive support. If they are not posting, obviously they do not want to share!

If you wrote a recommendation for someone and then did not hear back from them with a thank you or an update, is this considered rude? Just curious.

I didn't consider it rude a couple of years when I wrote one for a woman who really wanted Gamma Phi (prior to rush) and ending up (happily it seemed) in another house. I figured she didn't want to discuss it and honored her wish.

i have never written a rec, but i definately think you should receive a thank you note. i can sort of understand maybe not getting an update especially if the person went to a different house, but thank yous should have gone out even before rush started!!!

Agreed. You should thank every person who writes you a rec AS SOON AS YOU KNOW THEY HAVE COMPLETED IT!!!!!!

I haven't read this thread up until now and I am so glad I did!
I have never done the "what are they thinkign, you are the perfect sister material type girl... blah blah blah!"

When I was active there were plenty of girls on paper that looked great! But when we met them they were either rude, totally dissinterested or annoying. Sometimes nervousness or overzealous girls get cut because they come off as the above menitoned ways.

I don't feel it is fair to say "any house would be lucky to have you". What if your chapter is on that campus and cut that PNM? You are basically saying "my sisters are idiots" without saying it, for one, and for two PEOPLE THIS IS THE INTERNET!
We don't know these girls and they don't know us. They could be totally lying about their affiliation/school/invites/feelings.

If Suzie is going to University of Somewhere and sees that some GCers on here go there she may post about pretending to go through rush. That is why I think leaving names out is best.

The one thread where everyone is like "Where did she go? Oh my sources, blah blah blah" If that girl hadn't given her name then no one could do that! You can't just call and say "OH I am looking for a girl that posted on GC about her experiences and was only asked back to houses ABC DEF and XYZ can you tell me where she went?". Unless you are giving a rec I don't see the need for names unless they tell us, that is. I dont remember names on here usually, just screen names.

Anyway, my point is, you have to trust the sisters at the houses where these PNMs are going. We all know some PNMs slip through the cracks, but we also all know there are girls cut from all the houses for a reason- I know we did!

That is my 2 cents worth.

PS I am not saying don't encourage, I am just saying don't assume anything either.

Bump.

Oh, and if you're thinking "why, they couldn't possibly be referring to me!"....

ummmm......

yes we are.


OT to adpiucf, if you write a rec for someone, yes, you should receive a thank-you note or at least a quick email or message on your machine (if you included your phone #).

Well take it with a gain of salt. And show some sympathy for THEIR feelings.

Its kind of like a series of dates going bad for a girl. She really liked the guys, everyone is telling her how great they would be together, and then the infamous blow off.

You may be irritated, but she may be devastated and bitter. Social rejection is NOT fun.

So if she feels the need to snipe a little after 300 posts getting her hopes up . . .

Well, at least I can understand.

quote:
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PNM's and New Member's should also remember that as they are telling their stories, even after recruitment is over, to please refrain from making comments that could offend members of that GLO.
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Bumping
 

Spring rush is starting soon, always good to give this one a bump.

Bumping for the fall rush season!

Any updated comments?

There are so many good posts in this thread that I can't quote them all. GCers! Please heed the advice on here!

We don't know most of the PNMs so please try to strike a balance between being encouraging and breaking a PNM's heart further because of her cuts. She may tell us she was cut because of grades or that she doesn't know why she's been cut. This could be true--or it could be because she's been pulling trains all over campus since she was in high school. If she knows why she was cut and doesn't announce it here, let her just play it off.

Likewise, don't berate her by pm or otherwise for her choices. We're not there, we don't know why she dropped from rush or dropped certain groups or just dropped out of GC's sight after a few parties.

Amen! For all of us who enjoy the rush threads, please read and re-read this as needed over the next few months.

Being supportive is wonderful and I'm all for that :) Let's not have any unfortunate tales this year of GC'ers who go overboard on thread bumps and PMs to those women willing to share their recruitment stories with us.

also
 

remember that the people actually participating in recruitment(sorority members and pnms) are having to make decisions after a short period of time-sometimes as short as 10 or 15 minutes. we on gc, can read and re-read posts and ask a multitude of questions for as long a period of time as we want. and we are "seeing" only one dimension of a person. they are seeing the "whole" person, however brief the meeting .that said, i will wish all pnms and chapters participating in fall recruitment well, hope that everyone gets their first choice , that all chapters make quota plus and that no one is disappointed!

I'd like to add that, as each PNM does receive a bid, and it's from your sorority, MAKE SURE it's on the up & up! If after receiving the bid, she's not willing to announce what chapter at which college she just received a bid (even in a PM to a mod at that sorority's forum), my advice to be very suspicious!

After last year's fiasco of the fake PNM who received a fake bid at a fake college, I find someone who would take the time to do that pretty immature, if not just lowdown nasty!