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-   -   Etiquette? (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=117038)

DrPhil 11-21-2010 02:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005413)
In reality, the posts, like me for instance, understand fully what you are saying. I don't agree with it many times, and I respond with accordingly. Just because people don't agree doesn't mean they don't understand.

I can tell when people don't understand and are quick to disagree based on their assumption. That's what you did in this thread. Cheers, nonetheless.

Alumiyum 11-21-2010 02:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2005414)
The frigidity (is that a word?) was on your end. I'm typing about etiquette classes.

You assumed that I called something ridiculous and went on your southern etiquette rant as though you assumed that I am not a southerner. That's all on you. My points never changed and we reached an overall agreement in the end, which shows that you never really disagreed with me in the first place aside from your assumptions. Cheers, woman, damn.

I never disagreed with you about anything until you got riled up about my assuming the implied you was directed towards me in your response to my quoted post. I also didn't assume you were not from the south, as you said you were a while back.

PS-I'm glad for you and what you think you can tell about others. Keep in mind it is also possible that you might misread or misunderstand tone in others' posts. Cheers, the same.

DrPhil 11-21-2010 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005419)
I never disagreed with you about anything until you got riled up about my assuming the implied you was directed towards me in your response to my quoted post. I also didn't assume you were not from the south, as you said you were a while back.

Oh so you were just adding to my first post and included the southern education for kicks. Okay.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005419)
PS-I'm glad for you and what you think you can tell about others. Keep in mind it is also possible that you might misread or misunderstand tone in others' posts. Cheers, the same.

Nah, I got it covered.

Alumiyum 11-21-2010 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2005434)
Oh so you were just adding to my first post and included the southern education for kicks. Okay.



Nah, I got it covered.

Here is your first post:
"Etiquette is generally a good thing and it helps you to mingle in different environments. However, I recommend caution for these kinds of programs for two reasons:

1. People have differing opinions on some parts of etiquette. Make sure you are teaching business etiquette and aren't just teaching "stereotypically southern etiquette."
2. Make sure you know the difference between table etiquette and "teaching gender." I believe in teaching people how to eat at the table and other basic things but I don't agree with teaching people things like "women have to do this and men have to do that." Some etiquette classes delve into the gender part of it all. Blah.

In other words, don't be surprised if some people are resistant to certain aspects of table etiquette because, beyond the formality of it all, some of it seems ridiculous to some people.
__________________

I responded to the bolded, which brings the southern manners into play, as you can see.

knight_shadow 11-21-2010 03:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005441)
southern manners

*sigh*

DrPhil 11-21-2010 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005441)
I responded to the bolded, which brings the southern manners into play, as you can see.

No.

Alumiyum 11-21-2010 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2005454)
No.

So, your post does not in any way reference "stereotypical southern ettiquette".

:rolleyes:

DrPhil 11-21-2010 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005458)
So, your post does not in any way reference "stereotypical southern ettiquette".

:rolleyes:

What do you think? Once again, were you adding to my point or disagreeing with it?

ETA: I'll answer for you. You were actually adding to my point because you agreed that context matters and perhaps people can be taught some things just in case they need it. However, you seemed to have believed you were making the case for southern etiquette despite how "ridiculous" I thought it was.

Our discussion came from when you seemed to present southern etiquette and gender etiquette (which isn't the same as southern etiquette) as though there's a consensus regarding it. That's where our discussion came from. That contradicts the importance of context that you had stated earlier.

Alumiyum 11-21-2010 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2005461)
What do you think? Once again, were you adding to my point or disagreeing with it?

Neither. I was not adding to your point, though it's obvious we were not in disagreement overall. I was making a related point in my posts, that whether or not you think the custom is unnecessary, it is necessary in some situations. I think that yes, your direct use of this phrase: "stereotypical southern etiquette" introduced the topic.

Drolefille 11-21-2010 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005411)
What part of your messages directed towards me in this thread weren't condescending, rude, and/or bitchy? Especially since you jumped into an already frigid exchange between two posters that was not at all related to you. Look, if you can't take the same back at you, don't post it.

Also, don't make that face too long. What if it got stuck that way?;)

If you find it condescending to have someone point out to you that the literal words you were saying were factually incorrect, then I'm so sorry you have to deal with the real world.

You retreated to sarcasm because you were wrong. You continued to defend yourself despite the fact that you were, factually, wrong. You tried passive aggressiveness and smiley faces and yet, people aren't confused and are still very aware that you were wrong. So stop trying to redirect the negative attention and actually admit your error and attempt to have a conversation on those grounds rather than on the imagined ground that you fabricated while reading DrPhil's posts.

Stop trying to make it about me, you're not even good at it.

DrPhil 11-21-2010 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005462)
Neither. I was not adding to your point, though it's obvious we were not in disagreement overall. I was making a related point in my posts, that whether or not you think the custom is unnecessary, it is necessary in some situations.

Then why did you imagine that our discussion was "frigid?" There's nothing "frigid" about an overall agreement.

Alumiyum 11-21-2010 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drolefille (Post 2005466)
If you find it condescending to have someone point out to you that the literal words you were saying were factually incorrect, then I'm so sorry you have to deal with the real world.

You retreated to sarcasm because you were wrong. You continued to defend yourself despite the fact that you were, factually, wrong. You tried passive aggressiveness and smiley faces and yet, people aren't confused and are still very aware that you were wrong. So stop trying to redirect the negative attention and actually admit your error and attempt to have a conversation on those grounds rather than on the imagined ground that you fabricated while reading DrPhil's posts.

Stop trying to make it about me, you're not even good at it.

Here are examples of you being condescending, rude, and possibly even a tad bitchy:

"Yes, I elaborated more fully in my post and provided her with basic reading comprehension homework."

"Aw, look at her trying to be all passive aggressive because she was wrong and couldn't admit it.

It's OK. You've been wrong since your first post in this thread and we don't really expect you to change now. Hope never dies, but cynical expectations do wound it fairly well. "

In your opinion I am "wrong", so you got touchy. I responded in kind. You and Dr. Phil occasionally tag team in threads and like to play "I am superior, hear me roar". I don't really give a shit. You think I'm "wrong" about some inconsequential thing, you say something snide, I respond. It's an old pattern, I don't see where I am "wrong", and mostly I don't see why any of this is so important. However I AM literally watching paint dry in between layers, so I've got nothing else to do but continue this asinine game. Here you are: I'M WRONG, ACCORDING TO DROLEFILLE AND DR. PHIL. There is a statement of fact.

Alumiyum 11-21-2010 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil (Post 2005469)
Then why did you imagine that our discussion was "frigid?" There's nothing "frigid" about an overall agreement.

Because your tone is generally frigid (in regards to this instance). If you don't agree, all I know to say is that is how it appears to me.

DrPhil 11-21-2010 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005472)
I don't really give a shit.

Yeah you do. I'm still wondering how a discussion where you claim there is no real disagreement could have been "frigid." That makes me think that you had assumed some things and are now realizing that your assumptions are incorrect.

DrPhil 11-21-2010 03:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alumiyum (Post 2005474)
Because your tone is generally frigid (in regards to this instance). If you don't agree, all I know to say is that is how it appears to me.

Hmmm...I don't know what you mean so I'll go by what frigid means:

There's nothing warm or particularly endearing about most topics on GC. People who are looking for some personal investment or fluffy fairies when I type need to just find excitement when I use curse words. Cheers.

(I really think Alumiyum is just backpedaling.)


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