Is this a thread based on blind "dates" or someone you'd meet in a social setting? If I meet a young lady in a social setting, I pretty much can determine right then and there just from the conversation if there would even be a first date. So, I'll just make the assumption that it's based on a blind "date".

I don't really have a "list" of what would or wouldn't determine if there would be a 2nd date. For me, I also really don't like calling it a "date". I'd say more like hanging out, if anything. Of course the physical attraction has to be there. Other than that, I'm good, as long as she possesses the character and friendship qualities that I need in a long-term relationship. Also the spiritual commitment has to be the same, too, as well as family background, and shared values. I'll ask myself, would I pick her as a friend? If the answer is no, then there won't be a second "date".

I saw folks mentioning "interests and hobbies". For me, no, I may not have an interest in her hobbies, alone. Meaning, I wouldn't go out and enjoy those hobbies on my own, if I didn't have any interest in them. But it's not about her hobbies, for me, it's about seeing if she is a person that I would like spending time with if there were no romance at all. To me, that is the one true measure of a friend, a person with whom I like to spend time, having no regard to how we are spending it,--her hobbies or mine. Doesn't matter. The way I see it, I would want my best friends to be honest, faithful, spiritual, responsible, connecting, loving etc. So, those qualities also need to be present in her, too. If I don't see the first signs of any of this, then there won't be a 2nd date.

Everyone has got their own things they look for, but that's mine.

PB i thought you were gonna say ugly toes :D

So are you going to demand to see her feet if she's wearing closed-toed shoes? Just playing.

I've got a question for the ladies: What would you think if a guy took you on a date and it somehow came up that this was his first real date, even though he is almost 20?

Since I know you can tell from the question that that is my situation, I'll go ahead and admit it. Sure, I'm 19, just finished up freshmen year, am now a Kappa Sigma, and have many friends, both male and female, but I've never actually been on a date. Would that turn a girl off in any way, maybe making her think "Geez, this is his first date ever? What's wrong with this guy?"

So, if she said "Our waitress has a nice ass" then the second date is a no-go? lol. I thought guys were cool with women being able to see beauty in other women these days. lol.

There will not be a second date if...
*We run in to one or more of your exes. You know the spots where y'all hung out. Avoid them on the first date for the sake of awkwardness. If I meet two of your exes before dinner on the first date its a no go for the second.
*You have tats on your face.
*I have more chemistry with the server than I do with you.
*I enjoyed talking to the server about the days special more than our whole date.
*You're checking out the waiter just like I am. If we can agree that Brian the server has a nice ass we wont be dating again.
*you dont like sports (or you like the RedSucks and display it. You should be in the closet if you must be a RedSucks fan).
*You dont like black women.
*You dont speak english well enough to order food.
*You cant do arithmatic well enough to calculate the tip or worse...you dont tip.
*Everything you say comes with a disclaimer "this might sound crazy but" "I know this is the first date but"
*You are missing teeth. If you're over 21 and you dont have all of your teeth (or a very good reason like I lost them fighting in Iraq) I just cant date you.
*You have kids. Or someone is currently preggers by you.
*You wear hoop earings and refuse to not wear them again.

:D I just wait until the summer when she starts wearing flip flops. Plus, I wouldn't "demand" anything from her. Her toes/feet will eventually show over time spent. If she's got hammer toe, and/or it looks like she's been kickin' flour, then "just friends" we will remain. That is what we started out as, right?

At 19 I'd think you're a "late" bloomer. 19 isnt bad 39 thats a problem. And any girl who is stupid enough to think less of you because you've never been on a date isnt worth shyt any way. She should appreciate that youre going on a date with her and shouldnt be worried about your past.

There would be no 2nd date if our first date consisted of us going to a strip bar.

I don't think, at 19, that's a big deal. However, why would you feel compelled to even tell her that on a first date? I'm a lot older than you (like old enough to be your mom), but I don't think college has changed a ton in the dating arena. Dating was different in college. It was more like hanging out. Nobody had transportation or money so "dates" didn't happen like they do when you're in high school or when you're older. It would be more like going to the bar together when half the campus was there anyway or going to the football game and tailgating with the greeks, etc. Or, just hanging out in the dorms with each other, watching a movie, playing cards, etc.

LOL!! umm, how do I explain it, Hmmm. Have you ever known anyone whose mouth always seemed to have a little puddle around the bottom lip? It's kind of like drool but doesn't dribble down the chin just stays around the lip. Example: Diddy looks like he has a wet mouth. OR if the corners of their mouth is always wet, I can't do it. I can't kiss someone with all that excess saliva. Swallow sometimes! UGH lol

Well I'd rather be a late bloomer than a weirdo, that's for sure.

I understand what you're saying, but where I go to school, there isn't exactly much to do in-town other than go eat at a restaurant. I'm not saying I would bring it up by myself, just more of a "if it happened to come up", but I'm sure I'd be steering away from questions about previous dating anyway just because it seems like the polite thing to do. No one wants to talk about their previous dates (unless you've got some revelation about something) because they're on a date with you, and that's all that matters at that point in time.

YES!

I'm not saying I'm a golddigger, BUT.... LOL