Our candle passes were very similar (we called it a "candlelight”), except that you didn’t have to tell anyone at the chapter. All of the florists in town made bouquets (just like a bridesmaid’s bouquet) with a candle in the center. They would deliver it to the chapter house and it would sit on a table in the foyer all day, so everyone would see it (and make conjectures all day about who it was). Then, after dinner, we would pass it (once around for a lavaliere, twice for pinning, and three times for engagement-they were very uncommon at my chapter for anything other than engagement). We sang our sweetheart song while it was passed around the circle.

People would talk all day about who it was – the flowers were always a clue because we would think “whose favorite color is pink” or “Doesn’t Sarah love lilies?” Ah, memories.

My favorite candlelight was a girl in the pledge class just below mine. Her big and her twin were standing on either side of her. When she was holding the bouquet for the third time they blew it out. Her boyfriend (soon to be fiancé) came around the corner in full formal military dress, bowed, drew his sword, and presented her with a gorgeous ring on the end of the sword. So romantic...

We always went outside to avoid the ban on lit candles in the house. The honking of cars passing by tended to kill the mood on occasion.

US actives would type up a sign and put it on the bulletin board that there would be a candlelight after the weekly meeting. Once around for lavaliere, twice for pin, 3x for engaged. Ususally at homecoming there would be a apecial candlelight session. I remember the candle went around 4 and 5 times for marriage and expecting baby announcements due to returning alumnae.

This may be more particular to coming from a large chapter, but it always felt like we had 1-3 candlelightings after every single meeting! I often wondered how that many women could be getting engaged and lavaliered every week!!!

I remember feeling like that, too. There were definitely some months when we had a candlelight after every single chapter meeting!

...still waiting for mine... ;)

We actually had alumnae that would come back to our chapter years later to celebrate a candlelighting because of an engagement. I always thought that was a bit nuts, but as I'm getting older... I totally get it. haha

Sigma Chi Fraternity does not allow pledges to wear the Greek letters. However, they may wear shirts with the words "Sigma Chi" or "Sigs". This is a national regulation.

I can totally understand that! :-)

What was fun would be when you would come back from summer break and there might be like 4 or 5. Everybody's like we have to do this AGAIN?

Ahh, the many joys of huge chapters.

Just because the UCF people are still reading this thread, is anyone planning to go to a game this season in the brand-new on-campus football stadium?

Now that I am back in Florida, I definitely plan on it! :) We should have a UCF GC gathering -- there are enough of us on here!

That would be fun.

We should totally do that! I am purchasing student season passes- good luck getting tickets! We can definitely get together to tailgate if nothing else.

Candlepassings were the *only* thing we still used real candles for (shhhhh). But seeing as we had maybe 1 every other year, it wasn't really an issue. :p

And the sister having the candlepass would decorate the candle and then slip it into the president's room [hopefully without anyone seeing her] and we would do the candlepass after dinner but before chapter on a Monday night.

Ditto on the candlepassings being the only thing we used real candles for, but we had a few more than that. We probably had one every 3 weeks except for when we had a rush of them and then it was every chapter and even extra events like recruitment practice or something.

I'm from a young chapter. The fraternity kept a really sharp eye on us when I was in college, and so we couldn't get away with stuff like that. ;)

What was really funny would be when the sister didn't know how to turn off the candle. You could tell she was trying to do it, but the light wouldn't turn off. :D

I love Kappa, and understand why that rule exists, but it sure can take the romance out of a candlelight.

ETA: How on earth did you guys manage to have that few candlelights? Would some sisters just choose not to have one?

We go outside for candlepassings.

I know this question wasn't directed at me, but my chapter only had a few candlepasses in my four years there, for a couple of reasons. First, people at my school didn't "lavalier" or "pin" each other. Second, maybe this is a regional thing, but I don't know many people that got engaged in college. That's considered a young age to get engaged/married at now. My sisters had serious boyfriends, but hardly any of them would have considered getting married in college or right afterward. They were too busy with school, and most probably considered themselves "too young."

That's true. It may be a regional thing. I always forget that the Southern part of the US tends to have a lower marriage age than the national average.

I just got married at the beginning of this month, and I'm turning 24 in a few days. By the standards of my high school, I'm a bit old- many of my old high school classmates already have children!

It's really not at all abnormal around here to be getting married shortly after college.

Congrats on the New Member of the year. I didnt know that.

I also come from a small family in the chapter so I feel you on needing to have a little (though I never did) :(

I had a candlepass for my engagement. However there were so many people in the room we just did it 1 time around for friendship 2 time arround for lavilere/engagement/ etc.

Even though we had a somewhat larger chapter (85-90ish) few women had serious boyfriends that 1) were in fraternities or 2) were into lavaliering or 3) were ready to propose. Even now, at 28, I would say less than half my pledge class is married or will be married soon. (The big joke was that the class a year below us would all be married before my pledge class is, and I think it's actually going to happen!)

The coolest was when our House mom had one for when she got "reengaged" to her ex. Unfortunately, (or fortunately, as the case was) it was called off.

So at my chapter, what typically happened was that if you were the woman who had gotten lavieliered/pinned/engaged you found another member of the chapter. She made the sign to hang, told the president etc. Often instead of telling one of your closest friends, women would tell another member that they felt comfortable in confiding in, but that sisters wouldn't suspect one of her close friends as being the honoree if someone caught her with the candle/sign etc. This always lead to a lot of speculation about who the candlepassing was for and was half the fun.

Typically we lined up by class - freshmen, sophomores, juniors, and seniors. Our house mom would start it and pass it around once for friendship, always starting with the freshmen. Twice would mean lavieliered, three times for pinned and four times for engagement. I attended a lot of candlepassings in college and I think only one of them was ever for a pinning. I know one member of our chapter had five candlepassing when she was in school - three for lavieliering (yes, she got lavieliered by three different guys in three different fraternities), one for being pinned and one for being engaged.

I dont mean to sound dumb, but what exactly does lavieliered mean?

MOOOOSSTTTT Definitely!!! I have to get on it with tickets and what not (goodness UCF alumni things to do heh). However; I think that some Chi O alums are going to help out with the Prefs to the new chapter down at FGCU. I know the chapter is going down there to do it for them (How special is that?); but not sure about alums. I was told a few of us would - ie the ones that sung all the songs haha.

But even a dinner would be awesome to do!!

And Faith4Keep -- sorry about your feelings toward our chapter. I pinpointed most chapters out from the beginning! And definitely Sarah- there are only a few engineering females in Greek life.

For some reason I thought you were Stina (Christina). So beginning your thread I was stumped because I was like Stina went through in '03 with me -- and it didn't make sense.

Anyway- congrats on a great thread and finding your home!! And NM of the year!

1. Belated congrats on Theta. :)

2. AEPhi also forbids anyone who is not an initiated sister from wearing the Greek letters. New members can wear things that say "Alpha Epsilon Phi" or "AEPhi", but not "AEΦ".

3. Back in the day, we also did candle passes, with actual candles. We had a candle pass when I got engaged, and I had to explain carefully to a few people that I was engaged and not pregnant. :rolleyes: And speaking of candles, every year, the Greek Advisor would give us a lecture about how we weren't allowed to use candles during pref because they are a fire hazard... and every year, every sorority used them anyway.

Okay, what school is FGCU? I can't figure out the acronym!

You should definitely go; new chapters are so much fun!

As for a meetup, I'd actually be more in favor of meeting for a meal or something. It would probably be easier to schedule, since it's not confined to weekends.

I'm also not that much of a fan of football, and a glassy eyed and confused sherbertlemons isn't much fun!

Aww :) Florida Gulf Coast University! :) Well - I'm still awaiting the invitation - either way someone has got to teach the girls the songs :)

Dinners are always fun!!