Thanks, Jill. I'm really looking forward to the start of school. Keeping busy in the mean time...

LM

This time last year I was in the summer doldrums, so I know how you feel. Just hang on - it will go by faster than you think.

Congratulations on beginning your PhD! Don't take the 11-year route like I did!:p

Update!
 

Hi! I haven't been around much, but I just wanted to say that although nothing has really happened with my AI journey, I did get some words of encouragement from my "Little Women" connection. I'm certainly not giving up, but it is a little frustrating to watch the 1 year mark (since starting AI) quickly approach.

Keeping all the AI hopefuls in my mind! Best of luck...

LM

L M, keep a stiff upper lip! Look at how long it took Kelly (AKA) navan to get into a Family!:)

Re: Update!
 

Louisa May-

Sweetie, don't dispair! I know how hard it is-I too am approaching my one year mark, with initiation nowhere in sight. It disappoints me everyday, and I know it's hard to read the stories of all the other lucky pnam's who have found their homes already-but you have to keep thinking, that if it's right it will happen-maybe not tomorrow, or next month, or even next year-but it will happen! So hang in there, and feel free to pm me if you want to talk, ok?? Hugs to you!! :)

Ladies, I can honestly say - I know how you feel.

I'm past the 1.5 year mark. I had all kinds of twists and turns (check out my threads in this section) and there was a point where I threw in the towel on the whole thing.

Having to move suddenly to another state after being assured I didn't have to was another wrench in the works. :rolleyes:

But after some deep breaths, some extra sleep, and a LOT of encouragement from people on GC, I got back in the saddle. Call me crazy, but I think it will all be worth it in the end. After the time and effort we put into our AI pursuits never let ANY alumna (on GC or IRL) say that we took "the easy road" or that we didn't "earn our letters".

{{{HUGZ}}}

Adrienne
:D

Thanks, ladies! It is good to know that others are going through the same wishing and hoping that I am. I'm just not a passive person, and so much of this journey seems terribly passive. You don't want to seem too eager or too pushy or too desperate, etc. At the same time, you don't want to be too relaxed or seem not to care. You're right, adduncan, certainly NOT the easy road.

LM

Re: Re: Update!
 

hee hee hee....as the most current AI, I think that I can be excluded from the "already" comment. ;) Three and a half years in an AI search (and 7 years total) don't fit unless the statement is changed to "it's about time already!!" LOL


.....Kelly :)

Oh my.....do I ever know this feeling! It's a tough balance to try and not to seem too pushy, but yet keep your name out there so people don't forget about you.

Hang in there!

.....Kelly :)

Okay...I'm whining now!!!

I want this soooo badly. The more I learn about "Little Women," the happier I am that I am working toward A.I., but at the same time, I am feeling more and more discouraged. The woman who had helped me SO much and had been SO supportive has not been in touch with me in months. I know that her life has become very, very busy, and she has a lot more to worry about than me and my little dream. Still, I don't know who else to talk to. I don't want to burden her any more than I already have. I have written to the alum group on several occasions with no reply.

I'm not really asking for a full-proof answer from you guys, but I just had to do a little griping!

Okay...I'm done:rolleyes:

LM

Instead of just sitting here being a cry-baby, I decided to be PRO-ACTIVE. I e-mailed another Alumna officer from my area. I'll let you know as soon as I get a response. I also did some research, and I found a website for the collegiate chapter that I would like to help. I was able to find a few possible contacts there.

I feel better knowing that even though the decision is out of my hands, I can do something to make my interest known. At one point in this journey, I thought that my road was going to be a very smooth one. I shouldn't be surprised that my first approach became a dead end. Hopefully, I've just found a new door!

LM

Good idea. Things kind of slow in the summer but should pick back up again in August/September. Good luck!

Oh Damn, so gripe away, that is waht We are all here for!

This is your sounding board!;)

As aopirose, said, slow in summer, the living is easy!

Fall is the Wow time to go Baby Go!

Just Keep hand in! KAY!

Never is not ever!:cool:

LouisaMay-
Please hang in there!!! I completely understand how you feel. I am not going through AI, but there is a job at work that I have been trying to get for 3 1/2 years. It feels just like the AI process - WAITING, WAITING, WAITING...... You don't want to seem to eager but yet not act interested. I don't know if I will ever hear the fat lady sing.....

I remember complaining in November that I would have to wait until September for recruitment (ours is deferred until fall of sophomore year) and I'm still impatient (especially since the time I spent on GC had multiplied exponentially).

GOOD LUCK! I definitely wish you the best and I'm glad that you're getting settled into your new home!

Keep us posted and feel free to vent about anything!

I had a dream last night that I was accepted for membership in "Little Women." I was sent a big bouquet of flowers, and I had a wonderful surprise greeting from sisters from all over the state. It was an amazing dream!

LM

i hope that your dream is a sign of things to come!

Well...nothing, nothing, nothing. I'm going to send cards out with my new contact information (I moved over the summer), and my links to "Little Women" will definitely be finding them in their mailboxes.

I keep telling myself that things have been slow because of the summer. I hope that's true...

LM

Yes, things are usually always slow in the summer.

Hi, everybody!
I sent out my new contact info to the alumnae group, the collegiate chapter, and the officer who has been helping me. I haven't heard anything, but it's only been a week or so since the cards went out.

I'm still in this with everything I've got, but I'm certainly not short on things to keep me busy. I'm actually helping to organize a leadership conference at my alma mater. Should be fun!

LM

I'm still a little baffled about the abrupt silence from Little Women, but I have to stop second guessing everything! A few days ago, I received a kind message from a member of LW who has been really helpful throughout my search. I wish SHE was one of the local alums!:)

Homecoming is quickly approaching, and that is where everything started moving along last year. I was so hopeful and excited then. Now I'm just feeling anxious, confused, and a kind of discouraged. I haven't heard if there will be another Alumnae event like the chapter hosted last year, but maybe I'll just run into some of the members at the game. I can hope!

LM

LM

Hang in there girl, I know where you are coming from. Everything will work out the way they are supposed to......thats finding your home of course!

LM,

I feel your frustration, because I'm going through it as well. I've been at this for nearly two years with the same GLO. Everything I've received back has been positive, but it goes silent for months, until I contact them again. Then I get positive responses, but then, nothing again.

I don't understand it either.

Blue Angel

I'm confused
 

When I sent my contact info to the collegiate chapter, I used a valid campus address, but the card was returned to me as undeliverable. Finding that cute little purple envelope in my mailbox was like a slap in the face.

I'm not sure what to do now...

LM

Re: I'm confused
 

Call the campus and VERIFY the address they have on record for the group and then resend it. Persistence pays off :)

Good luck!

feeling down
 

Hi, everybody!
I'm just really feeling down about the end of my AI search. This is something that meant SO MUCH to me. I still read the AI board all the time, and I am cheering every AI-hopeful on as she makes her quest. I called it quits because I'm now a mom-to-be, and I actually feel REALLY guilty for even wishing that I could go on with my pursuit. I feel like, by continuing, I'm saying that being a Mom isn't fulfilling enough. But I can't erase the desire I have to give of myself to an organization that supports the development, education, and ambitions of young women. But will I have anything left to give once the baby comes? Do I even have the right to give time to a GLO that should be given to my family? Ahhh...as you can see, this has been difficult.

I was so sad when all contact seemed to come to an end between me and "Little Women." Things had been going so well...then nothing. But I accepted that some paths come to an end (and in the back of my mind, I thought that the trail might warm up in time). Long before I officially embarked upon the AI journey, I had made a list of organizations that fit my personal ideals, and I am sure that these groups, like Little Women, have something that makes them uniquely special. Now, even if I did decide to stay in the game and look into these groups, would a GLO even want me...a new mother?

Oh well...I guess I'm just venting. I can't help that a little jealousy came through when I saw several women finding their homes. I remember coming into college with this wonderful image of Greek Life, and even as a newbie, I knew that the aspect of sorority life that would mean the most to me was the lifelong commitment and the far-reaching bonds. I was never in it, primarily, for the college experience, and now, I feel like I won't have a chance at any experience at all.

Okay...I'm done whining!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LM

P.S. As far as I know, the "Little Women" alumnae group still has my contact info, letter of interest, etc. There just hasn't been any forward motion in a long, LONG time. Despite the quiet, there is still so much to love about this organization, and I guess that is part of my disappointment right now.

Re: feeling down
 

You shouldn't worry about feeling that way at all! It has nothing to do w/ whether being a mother is "fulfilling" -- it has to do w/ you finding your own circle of friends and a place for you to go when you need "you time."

We have several women in our alumnae group who have just had babies that still attend everything they can. Some alumnae groups even have special interest groups for mothers, such as "Mom & Tot" events.

My heart goes out to you, LouisaMay, but promise us you won't give up! Someone with your drive and desire has too much to offer a group. You sound like an awesome person.

There are AIs on this board who have children and have still been matched to a group. Having a child doesn't automatically exclude you...just take the next several months to re-group and adjust to your new life, then when you find your groove you will know how to proceed again. I have seen many NPC alum groups that have activities for new moms or moms with babies/toddlers. Perhaps that could be a way to meet members and pursue AI again, and fulfill that need for "adult" time and companionship!

It took me a total of nearly five years to finally be asked to be a member of my new home. In that five years' time, for various personal reasons, I wasn't always able to pursue AI consistently, but when I was, I pursued it with gusto, and now I'm home.

Feel free to PM me if you want to chat more.

Re: Re: feeling down
 

We have quite a few new babies in our alumnae chapter and our newest AI (a different GC thread) had her 3rd child in January and was pregnant the whole time she was going through.

And we have a mom-n-me group which is VERY popular!

First, congrat's on your baby to be! How exciting!

Don't give up! From my experience, silence doesn't mean "no".. it just means things are either:

1. moving slowly
2. have fallen through the cracks by accident

What I'm finding out is that AI is a new thing for many GLOs-- and it's not that uncommon for the people in that organization trying to help you to not follow through-- not because they don't intentionally, but because they didn't realize that they missed a step. Or.. they may be waiting for a vote, or for some paperwork. It's hard to know what's going on behind the scenes.

I think that unless you are told "no" outright-- then you need to be pro-active. You need to keep a positive attitude throughout the process-- even though it's VERY difficult at times. AI is an extremely difficult process, and it is a roller coaster with extreme ups and downs.

So many times, I was ready to throw in the towel because it had been MONTHS without hearing anything. But, each time, I either got on the phone or shot another e-mail saying, "Hi, it's me again. Any news?"

Don't forget... the women who are elected officials in these Alumnae Chapters are busy with jobs and their own families as well. They're volunteers... so... things DO slip through the cracks-- unintentionally.

One more piece of advice: try to find someone on Greek Chat who is in the GLO you are pursuing and PM them. Ask them if they can give you some advice. I wonder if in GC we might be able to set up a mentoring PM program?

And-- the time may not be right for you at this moment-- because your whole life is about to change due to the blessed event. But, once things settle down again, you might want to start knocking on the door to the organization you felt so positive about. Just keep reminding yourself, "SILENCE DOES NOT MEAN NO."

Good luck, and again, congratulations!

LM....

you know that I am feeling you right now...I say take it slow (redundant I know)...do not feel any guilt about wanting to be a part of a sorority now that you are preganant.

I say...send a follow email or if you don't feel comfortable in that, put out feelers for a lunch date, but let them know you are still interested.

A little contact does not equal pushy...share the news...its a joyous occasion.

I know you want this and I have hope that you will get it....and I know that 3 years seems like a long time....

but take this time in this new chapter in your life to experience all the wonders that motherhood will bring.

PM me if you need to talk

gwyn

Have faith and patience. I gave birth very shortly after my initiation and I have been active ever since. I enjoy my "AOII time". It is what helps to keep me grounded. I am expecting again and while I declined another local office for next year, I still have my international volunteer position. It can be done and no you are not selfish.

LM--
Like aopirose, my best friend volunteers for our sorority because that is her time to do something for herself. Don't feel guilty about pursuing this dream for yourself, that is important too.

Sororities are organizations for women, and women get pregnant. We need to celebrate that--and many organizations have ways to do that. I encourage you not give up, and be persistent.

I agree with the idea of contacting someone from GC to help--we are all so passionate, I can't imagine someone from here not helping and sheparding you through this process. Maybe someone from outside that org might be able to help too.

Best wishes on your pregnancy!

Thanks, everybody, for your support. As usual, you are great at pick-me-ups. I will certainly keep your advice in mind, and I am very glad that you don't think that I should stop because of my little one!

I have been in contact with a great GC member who has been wonderful from day one. She has been a great source of encouragement. Because I haven't heard anything from "Little Women" in 15 months (despite e-mails and greeting cards), I guess I just stopped corresponding with the GC mentor because I didn't want to put her in an awkward situation. If her sisters have decided that I am not a good fit with their organization, then I don't want her to feel that I am asking her to disagree with them. Know what I mean?

After the baby arrives and I get a handle on my new life, I think I will write to the alum group and the college chapter because there are certainly new members and officers in both places.

Thanks for being there....

LM

I am definitely still in the hunt. I wrote to my GC "cheerleader," and she offered some interesting and helpful new information. Obviously, my family will be #1 forever, but I hope to show my son or daughter that mama can be many things!!!

Thanks again for all of your support.

LM

Hang in there LM...at times it felt that I was going nowhere but waiting sure paid it off....:)

I recently discovered that the alumnae group in my area now has a website. Maybe this will make things easier when I am back in the AI groove. This must be a recent development since I hadn't seen this sort of resource when I was actively trying to connect with the women here.

LM:)

An update!
 

Hi, everyone!
Well, I'm now VERY pregnant and very anxious to be a Mommy. I'm also excited about the possibility of starting up my AI process again after I get the swing of raising a baby and all that comes with it!

I've been trying to take it easy, so I've been online a lot more. Of course, that always gives me the AI bug all over again.

Staying cool and hopeful!!!

LM

A+++, New Mommy!:cool:

That is a Priority Now, AI is second, for now!:)

Pssssst! LM! Please clean out your PM box!