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-   -   Northern Arizona University Formal Recruitment (https://greekchat.com/gcforums/showthread.php?t=98988)

violetpretty 08-26-2008 09:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by irishpipes (Post 1705864)
I think most house corps and chapters work well together. But, the corporation has bills to pay, and truthfully, are less likely to be emotionally involved with the chapter members. If a mortage or rent payment has to be made, the corporation has to take in enough money to make it. In my post I said that the chapter might make an exception that the corporation may not recognize. To me, that means the chapter makes a decision to violate policy on behalf of a member. So, even if the chapter's policies are in line with the corporation's, if one of them violates a policy, even with good intentions, they are no longer aligned.
Does the house corp care if a member doesn't fulfill her live in "requirement" if there are enough other sisters that want to live in to fill the house?

basket96 08-26-2008 11:06 PM
disasterscookie,
you have an AWESOME attitude and I wish you the best recruitment experience possible. Please post and let us know how it goes for you! I will be sending good vibes your way!

breathesgelatin 08-27-2008 12:07 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by violetpretty (Post 1705984)
Does the house corp care if a member doesn't fulfill her live in "requirement" if there are enough other sisters that want to live in to fill the house?
In my experience, no.

In my chapter of Pi Phi you had to sign a form during the NM period that stated you would live in the house if needed, and that you were obligated to do so.

But my chapter always had more people that wanted to live in the house than were spaces in the house, so it was never a problem. None of the housing obligation forms were ever "called in," so to say.

According to chapter history, when the houses first opened (2000), there was some initial reluctance to live in the house and the house corporation conducted a lottery to decide who would live in. In that case, if you would have refused to live in, but weren't called up during the lottery, it didn't matter to the house corporation either.

Of course we had only 20 spots in our house and ~80-100 members (we grew a lot during my four years), so it was a much different thin than if we'd had 100 spots to fill or something.

ASUADPi 08-27-2008 12:23 AM
I just found out, but didn't know, is that for girls at our ASU chapter who chose not to live in, they just pay an additional fee (for not living in). Honestly, I would say to the OP, enjoy rush, take it one day at a time and cross the bridge of "living in" when the time comes. I'm sure that something can be worked out between you and any sorority that you might possibly join.

As for being married, I'm sure it just depends on each chapters rules. I remember reading some of our rules eons (literally) ago and it didn't say anything about married sisters or sisters with children. I don't know a part of me thinks that if sororities discriminate because a PNM is married or has a child that it could somehow bite them in the butt (especially considering we live in a very "sue happy" society right now).

ZetaGirl22 08-27-2008 02:26 AM
When I was a collegian, we had a 1 year live in requirement. It was, in fact, strict enough that if you hadnt lived in the house and were called upon to do so and you didnt, you could be expelled from the chapter. There werent any exceptions, save a planned semester abroad or commitment to serve as an RA. That happened to my first little sister, and it was awful. Her parents threatened to stop paying her tuition if she lived in.

With that said, we DID have two married sisters when I was a collegian. One actually had a bed in the house her first year of marriage. She was exec and execs were required to live in the house. Plus she lived quite far away from campus and it made life easier for her to have somewhere to stay on nights she had late class. Another sister got engaged as a new member, got married, and remained active all 4 years of college (she was a freshman when she joined) so being married and being in a sorority IS possible!

gphiangel624 08-27-2008 08:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by disasterscookie (Post 1705896)
I think I am just going to honest. I think it is so much easier. Plus, I have plenty of friends in a majority of the sororities that I am sure it would get out quite quickly that I was married.
When asked about being married and how it will affect my sorority life, I will simply let them know that I am willing and able to make the commitment, I want it, and obviously I am a commitment kind of person (marriage and sisterhood are both life long commitments, correct?)
In my personal opinion, I think I have much more depth than JUST being married, and if the sororities find it more important that I am married and cannot live in, then I don't think it would be the situation or the organization for me. As it states on many of the threads, sorority life is not for everyone. I want it to be, I think it can be for me...but in the end they have to choose me, correct? And if they don't, then it's obviously not for me...right?
I feel good about it. I rather be honest.
Thank you for all your help and opinions. Friday is the first day of official recruitment, I'm really excited to get started, get some questions answered, and to keep you guys posted on how it goes and what I learn.
:)
It sounds like you've got a good head on your shoulders and that, whatever the outcome, you're going to be happy. I wish you the best of luck.

Kansas City 08-27-2008 09:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by basket96 (Post 1705820)
KansasCity,

I agree with your point, but flat feet are unlikely to be noticed in a PNM whereas a wedding ring is likely TO be noticed. I think many actives are likely to make assumptions NOT in OP's favor that's why I recommend being up front. I'd hate to see her NOT get a bid because actives assumed she would not have the time to dedicate when clearly she has stated she does. I think by being up front she assuages that doubt in the minds of the women she meets and they are able to look at her with a more open mind. I think it's being proactive and turning a potential negative into a positive.

Also, I would think that most house boards would allow live-out status to a married undergraduate. But, it's probably best to ask those things up front so they don't come back to hurt you later. Like has been said previously, EACH chapter is different.
First flat feet were just a silly example of something that you might not what to announce to total strangers. Instead, I'd like to hear responses to the job and transportation issue I also posed.

I agree that the OP needs to be totally honest and forthright about her relationship, including wearing her ring, during recruitment but I don't think that she needs to announce it to the whole world or should initiate the conversation about her private relationship. I think that doing so will only give potential chapters a reason (albeit, not a very good one) to justify cutting her. I'm not familiar with the campus but if NAU is at all competitive, I'd keep the information under wraps unless asked about it.

Here's what I would suggest as far as the conversation goes ...

HOUSING: (for OP to ask member)
Instead of this: "Tell me about your house. Since I'm married, am I required to live in the house?"
Try this: "Tell me about your house. What are your live-in policies and are their any exceptions?"

RELATIONSHIP: (if member asks about the relationship)
Instead of this: "I'm married, will this be a problem?"
Try this: "I married a wonderful man # years ago but really want to get the most out of my undergraduate experience."

In both situations, the OP is honest but is not providing an obvious reason for the chapters to cut her based on her private situation.

I too will not go into a room and announce to all that "I have Flat Feet!" :D

irishpipes 08-27-2008 06:55 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by violetpretty (Post 1705984)
Does the house corp care if a member doesn't fulfill her live in "requirement" if there are enough other sisters that want to live in to fill the house?
I know the corp I work on now doesn't care who is in the house, as long as it is full. But, the way it is worded is that it is each member's responsibility to live in the house, and applications for exception are only considered after enough contracts have been received to fill the house. So, if a member still chose not to live in, her choices would be to pay for the empty bed or take suspension.

MerryGPhiB 08-27-2008 07:12 PM
Great Verbal Skills!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kansas City (Post 1706205)
First flat feet were just a silly example of something that you might not what to announce to total strangers. Instead, I'd like to hear responses to the job and transportation issue I also posed.

I agree that the OP needs to be totally honest and forthright about her relationship, including wearing her ring, during recruitment but I don't think that she needs to announce it to the whole world or should initiate the conversation about her private relationship. I think that doing so will only give potential chapters a reason (albeit, not a very good one) to justify cutting her. I'm not familiar with the campus but if NAU is at all competitive, I'd keep the information under wraps unless asked about it.

Here's what I would suggest as far as the conversation goes ...

HOUSING: (for OP to ask member)
Instead of this: "Tell me about your house. Since I'm married, am I required to live in the house?"
Try this: "Tell me about your house. What are your live-in policies and are their any exceptions?"

RELATIONSHIP: (if member asks about the relationship)
Instead of this: "I'm married, will this be a problem?"
Try this: "I married a wonderful man # years ago but really want to get the most out of my undergraduate experience."

In both situations, the OP is honest but is not providing an obvious reason for the chapters to cut her based on her private situation.

I too will not go into a room and announce to all that "I have Flat Feet!" :D
Kansas City- great suggestions on the verbal skills! It is all in how you pose the question. It will also show interest and have the chapter member talking more about their guidelines. I would imagine many members would not know how to answer the marriage question. Unless they had been posed the question before. ( Or unless thier panhellenic brought it up)

WEll done!

SkiingSister 08-27-2008 10:31 PM
NAU has greek dorms...
 
NAU has a Greek dorm. I believe that each sorority has a floor. I do not know if members are required to live on the floor.

disasterscookie 08-27-2008 11:01 PM
It's encouraged...to say the least.
Depending on the sorority. The smaller culturally based ones require each sister live in for a minimum of 2 years. I think the larger NPC sororities are more lax...I hope. But I shall find out for sure come Friday!

OMG! SO SOON!!! :p

texas*princess 08-28-2008 12:23 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by violetpretty (Post 1705984)
Does the house corp care if a member doesn't fulfill her live in "requirement" if there are enough other sisters that want to live in to fill the house?
In my chapter, I was property mgr. for a year and if the house was full and we knew all the beds were going to be filled the following year, it was OK.

There were many girls who lived in the house well beyond their 1-yr requirement which "saved" others from having to live in the house, but if it got to the point where there were empty spaces, we went down the list of those who hadn't put in their 1 - yr requirement.

There were very few exemptions - if your parents live withing a certain radius and you were living at home, or if you were an RA, or if you were studying abroad or something. I don't recall being married being one of the exemptions though.

disasterscookie 08-28-2008 10:41 AM
Formal Recruitment Officially starts tomorrow!
The closer it gets the more nervous/uncomfortable I get.
I think I can handle the pressure, but nobody likes rejection.

honeychile 08-28-2008 11:47 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by disasterscookie (Post 1707037)
Formal Recruitment Officially starts tomorrow!
The closer it gets the more nervous/uncomfortable I get.
I think I can handle the pressure, but nobody likes rejection.
As hard as rejection can be, bear in mind that you only need ONE bid!

OMGreek25 08-28-2008 04:29 PM
I'm rushing at NAU too! I went to the sorority luau in Reilly, it was a blast. The recruitment councellors are all so nice, they made me even more excited about rush. (If that was even possible!) Friday can't come soon enough!


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