That's like putting prime rib in front of a dog and telling him not to eat it.;)

While my reaction to my daughter getting released would have been far different from the mother in question, I have learned that as a parent you can never judge another parent. Once you let the words out 'I would never' or 'I can't believe that they did/allowed that' then you will surely be put in the exact same position and perhaps even react the same way. We do not know this mother or daughter or what their relationship is like. She mentioned that her daughter is shy, perhaps by saying 'did she try hard enough' she meant small thinks like speaking audibly or making eye contact. Shy people do have to work at small stuff like that. As to the comment about Auburn being the right school for her daughter, that could have meant many things. I would like to assume that for a shy girl, going to a very large school and not getting into a social unit (in this case a sorority) would make for a tough start to a college career. Shyness is a hard trait to deal with, it does require effort to overcome. I hope that the mother in question has not been scared away from all of the harsh postings because I would love to know what happens to her daughter as the semester unfolds.

I know that shyness is hard to overcome, I'm not a naturally extroverted person, and I know it takes effort. I should have been more specific - the mom said something along the lines of, if you really want something badly enough, you give it 110% - leading me to believe she felt her daughter didn't try hard enough to get into a sorority because it wasn't so important to her. That's what I object to, the mentality towards her daughter embodied in that statement.

Time to quote the "Southern Belle Primer"
 

While I don't have a copy of the book in front of me -- the passage goes something like this:

"My mama was a Chi O, my aunts were all Chi Os and my cousins are all Chi Os. If I don't get a bid from Chi O...I'll just die. I'll have to move to Pittsburgh!"

My apologies to the nice people of Pittsburgh and to all the fine sororities at Ole Miss, but my point is -- some families DO take it very seriously.

I think what really killed me is that the mother obviously doesn't understand SEC recruitment. The mother said she was an AST. I'm absolutely not picking on AST, but they don't have many, if any chapters at ultra-competitive campuses. Therefore, the mother most likely went to a college where not only do most people get placed, but most people get their first or second choice as well...

And how is it that you understand it so well? Just wondering.

Because most ASA chapters are at similar type campuses. Someone did a "who overlaps with who" thread for NPC groups and ASA & AST share tons of campuses.

I understand that -- I'm questioning AlphaFrog's understanding of an SEC Rush.

I did not go to an SEC school, but we had a semi-competitive rush (not unheard of for girls to not get a bid, and it was fairly common for a girl to get her third choice).
However, being on GC for the past year and just reading others accounts had taught me TONS about SEC rush. Someone coming from a semi or non competitive school to an SEC school without the background would be completely lost.
That's why I love the advice of "do a search and read other threads". I don't think the Mom in question had been around for long and based on that you can assume that she really didn't know much about SEC rush. At least that's how I read it.

That doesn't make it right.

And, btw, what SEC school did you go to?

My point -- and I guess I should just come right out and say it! -- is:

The most knowledgeable posters are the ones who have been through a like situation.

I guess the second-most-knowledgeable would be the regular posters on GC?

Oh, and I totally agree with you there. I do not think it's the be all end all by any means. I do realize that there are several who don't get bids and indeed transfer to another school.

In another life I visited many campuses. Most recently I spent two weeks at Univ. of Alabama during their recruitment.

See, here's the thing - I've never been through an SEC Rush, I've never visited an SEC campus, and I don't plan to, but I do understand that 1400 girls divided by 9 or so sororities means that somewhere along the line, there's going to be some heavy cutting and huge heartbreak. Great women are going to go bidless, and not for lack of trying. Simple math and multiple heartbreaking SEC Rush threads here on GC will give you enough understanding that a woman is not the dregs of society if she doesn't make it into an SEC sorority, and it's not the end of the world OR even the end of university life if it doesn't happen.

Now, please, find something else in my post to question. I do so love it when you attempt to be snarky. It's highly entertaining.

I know you respect those who say what they think.

I do. However, questioning my knowledge of topics that have nothing to do with anything. I was not claiming to be an expert on SEC, rather pointing out that the mother in this particular situation probably didn't understand that her rush was 1000 times different than her daughter's rush.