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aephi alum 06-14-2007 01:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OtterXO (Post 1466678)
haha, I know what you mean. Wouldn't we know if an organization has that policy though? It seems like that would be an aspect of MS that would be tough to keep a secret.

Yes, we would. At my alma mater, the sororities were required to disclose their legacy policies. Specifically, we were required to provide a definition of who is a legacy, and what we were required to do (invite her to the first invitational round, put her on the first bid list if she attends pref), but not how difficult it would be to, say, cut a legacy before pref.

I don't think any org makes it flat out impossible to release a legacy. What if the legacy has a bad reputation, or just plain isn't a good fit? A chapter could be pressured to keep a legacy, but if she's not a good fit, she's not a good fit, and she should be released.

SmartBlondeGPhB 06-14-2007 01:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnation (Post 1466705)
Boy, I know what would be worse. Either getting the call or not getting the call and finding out from your legacy. I know a mom and first daughter in one group and the second daughter was released last year and the chapter never called, the second daughter did--in hysterics. Mom went there immediately and the daughter pledged another group but Mom and first daughter haven't recovered yet. They wrote to their national office but only got the stock response--"we're sorry, each chapter makes its own membership selections".

Actually, few women around here do get the call when their daughters are released. There are just so many....

We leave it up to the woman to notify her family.

alphagamphi 06-14-2007 05:03 PM

okay we had to let the girls who were cut from their legacy let their loved ones know. It sucked. I wasnt told till I got my list of what houses I was going to be going to.

alphagamphi 06-14-2007 05:04 PM

In case any of you are wondering i pledged






















Dolphin



Which is















Alpha
Gamma
Delta

OtterXO 06-14-2007 05:06 PM

Yay! Sorry we sidetracked your thread with that discussion though :)

Ocalagirl 06-14-2007 05:08 PM

Are you going to post what the chapters are? No pressure...just curious:)

alphagamphi 06-14-2007 05:29 PM

Dolphin - ALPHA GAMMA DELTA
Squirrel - DELTA GAMMA
Horse - ALPHA CHI OMEGA
White Tiger - SIGMA KAPPA
Beavers - KAPPA ALPHA THETA
Panda - KAPPA DELTA
Bear - KAPPA KAPPA GAMMA
Cheetah - ALPHA PHI
Monkey CHI OMEGA
Kangaroo DELTA DELTA DELTA
Lion PI BETA PHI
Wild cat GAMMA PHI BETA

here are the chapters... I didnt mean to disrespect any one of them. I had friends in many chapters.

UGAalum94 06-16-2007 08:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmartBlondeGPhB (Post 1466753)
We leave it up to the woman to notify her family.

Interesting. Is this the national or local policy of your group? Did you decide on it for philosophical or purely pragmatic reasons?

I'm interested in how it evolved that way.

I can understand that it's primarily the PNM's business where she's invited back, but from the perspective of an alumna, if I had a legacy for whom I completed a legacy form, and she rushed at a campus with my group, especially if it were my own campus with my chapter, I would want to hear from the chapter that they had released her. It's somewhat about my legacy, but it's also about my relationship with the chapter.

Because, I'll be honest, at the point I had a legacy cut by a chapter, I think I'm done with that chapter in terms of interest and support. Your rejection of my flesh and blood, particularly if you aren't a group at a campus with hundreds of legacies where a chapter couldn't possible give bids to them all, is going to put a big dent in my feeling of connection to you.

At least, you could reach out to me with a phone call, or so it seems to me.

How did Gamma Phi Beta view the issue?

SWTXBelle 06-16-2007 09:03 PM

In the most recent edition of The Crescent, ( you can find it at www.gammaphibeta.org) there is a legacy introduction form. On it, it states that it is the policy of Gamma Phi Beta to allow the legacy to notify her mother/grandmother/person who makes her a legacy. So, International HQ's policy is to leave it up to the PNM.

GeekyPenguin 06-16-2007 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle (Post 1468157)
In the most recent edition of The Crescent, ( you can find it at www.gammaphibeta.org) there is a legacy introduction form. On it, it states that it is the policy of Gamma Phi Beta to allow the legacy to notify her mother/grandmother/person who makes her a legacy. So, International HQ's policy is to leave it up to the PNM.

I actually like that we do this. Let's say that Suzy PNM is going through recruitment and after Day 2 she decides that she just doesn't like the Gamma Phi chapter that she iis an in-house legacy to and she is happier at the other houses she's visited. This way rather than saying "Mom, I hate your house and have ranked it last every day waiting to get dropped" she can just tell her mom/sister that she isn't going back to Gamma Phi, or even tell a little white lie and say she didn't get invited back. Maybe she'd rather wait to the end of recruitment and then just tell her mom how happy she is in XYZ.

UGAalum94 06-16-2007 09:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle (Post 1468157)
In the most recent edition of The Crescent, ( you can find it at www.gammaphibeta.org) there is a legacy introduction form. On it, it states that it is the policy of Gamma Phi Beta to allow the legacy to notify her mother/grandmother/person who makes her a legacy. So, International HQ's policy is to leave it up to the PNM.

Do you know how or why it got to be the policy? Has it always been that way?

(I understand why from a purely pragmatic and bureaucratic standpoint why it might be the "best" policy, but it seems like it would cause a great deal of harm over time with alumnae who had legacies released. I don't know, maybe it turns out that the phone call doesn't help anyway: if you cut the PNM, maybe nothing the chapter does affects the mother's future behavior with the chapter.

UGAalum94 06-16-2007 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GeekyPenguin (Post 1468162)
I actually like that we do this. Let's say that Suzy PNM is going through recruitment and after Day 2 she decides that she just doesn't like the Gamma Phi chapter that she iis an in-house legacy to and she is happier at the other houses she's visited. This way rather than saying "Mom, I hate your house and have ranked it last every day waiting to get dropped" she can just tell her mom/sister that she isn't going back to Gamma Phi, or even tell a little white lie and say she didn't get invited back. Maybe she'd rather wait to the end of recruitment and then just tell her mom how happy she is in XYZ.

I generally think honesty among family members is the best route when it comes to explaining why you made the decisions that you have. I doubt that much long lasting harm will come of a girl choosing a group other than her legacy group if it's her choice, but maybe my family dynamics are exceptionally healthy that way. My experience is that we want other members of our families first to be happy with the decisions that they make. It's a bonus if they think they will be happy in our groups, but it's really not a big deal if they choose to go a different route.

On the other hand, no matter how much we value our groups, most of us in life as alums don't care about them as much as we do our own sisters, daughters or granddaughters. I can easily see alums who are a whole lot less likely to support a chapter who cut their legacies.
It would seem that maintaining relationships with the alumna member has a real value, and I wonder how Gamma Phi Beta reached the decision that they did, not that it's really any of my business.

It's possible that making the calls was creating a ton of ill will and hometown gossip while recruitment was still going on. And I certainly know that Gamma Phi Beta knows what's best for their organization. I'm not second guessing that. I just wonder how and why it evolved the way it did, and I wonder if more groups will go to it.

It certainly seems easiest in terms of membership selection and notification for the chapter in the short term.

AlphaFrog 06-17-2007 06:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alphagamuga (Post 1468149)
Because, I'll be honest, at the point I had a legacy cut by a chapter, I think I'm done with that chapter in terms of interest and support. Your rejection of my flesh and blood, particularly if you aren't a group at a campus with hundreds of legacies where a chapter couldn't possible give bids to them all, is going to put a big dent in my feeling of connection to you.

That's kind of petty. You and your (fictional) daughter aren't the same person. The CHAPTER itself is not the same. You'd rather they kept your (fictional) daughter, no matter how bad of a fit she is with the house? What if she rushed just because you put all kinds of pressure on her to rush, she acts like an ass at all of the parties and is rude to PNMs? Would you still expect your chapter to keep her?

AGDLynn 06-17-2007 08:40 AM

On another note, it's interesting how the member hasn't had contact with the GLO, may or may not even receive the magazine, for decades but suddenly seems to "know" how it operates...even though procedures may have changed since she/he was a collegiate.

SWTXBelle 06-17-2007 08:51 AM

I like the Gamma Phi Beta policy because it takes the responsiblity off of the chapter - she (the person writing the legacy form) knows that she will not be receiving a call if her legacy is not invited back, and it is international policy, not the "fault" of the chapter.


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