Bumping in honor of Festivus. :D

"H & H...and Elaine!"

But I don't want to be a pirate!

"i thought we had a deal with the pigeons!"

"georgieeeeeeee!" ~george's mother

If everything I've ever thought is wrong, then I just have to do the opposite....

Up is down!
Good is Bad!
Left is Right!
Day is Night!

BOOKIE: So. You're Elaine Benes. We've been getting calls fro you for 5 years.

ELAINE: So, listen, when this guy calls, if you could just give him my real number..

BOOKIE: (Interrupting) Hey, Charlie! Guess who's here. Elaine Benes.

CHARLIE: Elaine Benes?!

BOOKIE: You make a lot of man friends. You know who's a man? Charlie here, he's a man. You know who else? Me. I'm a man.

CHARLIE: (faintly) I'm a man.

And of course George's answering machine:

"Believe it or not, George isn't at home
Please leave a message at the beep
I must be out or I'd pick up the phone
Where could I be?
Believe it or not, I'm not home..."

she had man hands.

he's a close talker.

she's a low talker.

cartwright??? cartwright???


5-10 minute

jerry: people....i hate them.

elaine: yeah, they're the worst!

george's dad- I'M BACK, BABEE!!!

Woman: Mr. O'Brien?

Jerry: No, I'm, uh, Dylan Murphy. Mr. O'Brien had a long trip, he's sleeping.

Eva: Oh, well I don't want to disturb him. We're just rather excited to meet him face to face, finally. We're faithful readers of his newsletter.

Jerry: Newsletter?

Tim: And of course, his great book, "The Game".

Jerry: Oh, yes, he's very proud of his work in the big game. So you've never, uh, met him before?

Eva: No.

Jerry: Never seen a picture of him?

Eva: Never.

Jerry: Not even on the book jacket?

Eva: There was no picture on the book jacket.

Jerry (nudging George): Hey O'Brien, wake up, c'mon, we got company. Wake up.

George: Hello. I'm O'Brien.

And you wanted to be my latex salesman

George: I WAS IN THE POOL!!

"Too bad you couldn't do *that* for a living... You'd be very successful at it. You could sell out Madison Square Garden. Thousands of people could watch you. You could be a big star!"

Jerry: You're crazy!
Kramer: Am I? Or am I so sane that I just blew your mind?

You've got three pints of Kramer in you, buddy.