Exactly!!!

You know what's really funny about this disagreement?














There's no proof for this concept anywhere, other than the 'common-sense' notion of men making millions of sperm and women only dozens of eggs. This is social conditioning at its finest - fitting the world to fit your views, rather than the other way around.

All people like sex, dudes, that's why we evolved into sexually-stimulated creatures. Societal issues provide the outside pressures. Humans don't use "instinct" anymore, just like we largely don't macro-evolve - you are misusing the word "instinct" to describe tendencies here if you think otherwise.

Here's another theory that carries just as much weight as any other: Anyone, male or female, would be a 'whore' if we existed in a vacuum (ie no one would ever know), and had unlimited access.

I see where you're going with this but you're way off base. The government is not trying to tell kids when the ideal time to have sex is...well okay maybe you're, but many countries do not have abstinence only sex education classes. Canada being one of them (unless you go to a catholic school). Secondly, the reason why women do not get married young and do not have children young is not because it's not socially acceptable. In some parts of the world it is socially acceptable. The main reason is because it is no longer necessary. People got married young and had children young because their life spans were so short. Many people only lived till the age of 40 or so. As medical science advanced, there became no reason to have a child at 14 because you weren't going to die at 40, you'd live to 70. So why not wait till you were 25 to have a child? As society "improved" behaviours changed. It is only later in developments that people decide that certain behaviours are socially inacceptable.

First off, condescension is unnecessary and not appreciated. Maybe that was unintended, but it came across that way to me. Secondly, i'm not a psych expert so maybe my use of words was incorrect. I was using the word instinct to generalize the behavior of most men. I don't think that a pattern of behavior in humans and in animals quite qualifies as anyone fitting the world to their views. I think that ideally (if the world fit to my views) I would like men (actually one guy in particular) to always be at the same place in their life as I am....haha ;) I'm not saying it's a license for anyone to be an asshole, it just explains a few fundamental differences between men and women. I'm not quite sure why you have a problem with that type of thinking, but if natural human behavior is different then we all think it is then please, explain it to us...

Has anyone else noticed this topic has strayed away from "love online?" ;)

We don't? Why then are little boys automatically attracted to/like little girls? Why does a boy ask a girl to be his girlfriend? Parents don't teach their 6 yr old that he is supposed to like little girls...it just happens. Parents surely don't teach their sons that they are supposed to stick the thing between their legs inside a girl. I understand where you are going with ur statement but don't you think it's pretty far-fetched to say we don't use instinct anymore? If someone is trying to kill you and you stop them, is that not instinctive? There are two kinds of animals in this world, predators and prey. Prey have eyes on the side of their head and predators have eyes on the front. We, as humans, are the ultimate predator on this planet. U think we don't still use instinct?

Think about this; In the business world it's either kill or be killed. Someone comes in with a better price/cuts the deal from underneath you/puts your livelyhood in jepordy, what do you do? You figure out a way to beat them. Don't you? Well, that is a form of instinctive behaivor.

abby,

don't be bitter cuz i turned you down for cyber sex. i'm so pimp, i gotta beat the GC hunnies off with my keyboard.

Its instinct to want to have sex. Or more correctly we could call it a drive.

So we have drives. Social conditioning often determines the way we express those drives.


As far as why marriage is delayed now. I think part of it is our evolving society . .. we are encouraging goals now other than settling down and making a family. And we are making them important enough to delay marriage etc.

If you lived iin an area of subsistence, no education, and little industry the idea of creating a family might be the major life goal.

The first world countrieshave changed that a bit. I am not sure its good or bad,

No condescending nature intended, dude, sorry if it came off like that, my bad.

Anyway - I don't think you see this pattern in most animals, as they mate for life, and w/out the 'tryout' period you see in humans.

I totally agree with your 'asshole' comment, but when you say "fundamental nature" you make a lot of assumptions, most of which you're basing on things you see in your everyday life. OK, that's cool, but how do you know you're not extending what people think is 'appropriate' into what is really 'fundamental'?

How can you be sure you're not extending these centuries-old views that men can be sexually liberated, while women must be pure, into some sort of 'natural order' that may or may not exist? I'm just pointing out that there's no proof for this theory at all, it's just conjecture. Perhaps it is correct - but perhaps it is a really backwards-ass way of looking at gender roles.

I'm not sure either way, but while it may seem obvious to say "men are bred for multiple sexual partners" I think that, from science, it's not that simple at all, and it brings in biases that we're born with (almost as strongly as any instincts we've developed).

Why do some little boys ask little girls to be their girlfriend, and then later make out with other boys? Why do they use the word "girlfriend" by rote, when their comprehension of the term can't be anything better than tenuous?

Maybe it's because it is partially learned behavior . . . you see males coupling with females, like your mom and dad or the people on the TV, so you emulate it. That's my point - and sure I was overreaching a bit with the 'no instinct' part, surely we have primal instincts such as your 'fight or flight' example.

I think that the view of males as 'sexual predators' is something learned from societal views on males, shit that stems more from centuries-old customs such as dowries and being a virgin on her wedding night than from hundreds of thousands of years of evolution. Humans are not the ultimate predators, but rather the utlimate omnivores, able to eat almost anything and use the only overdeveloped part of our bodies, the brain, to adapt - our eyes look forward, sure, but more than half of our teeth are flat, a classic herbavore trait. Here, I think we're using this overdeveloped brain to fit science into how we see gender roles play out, and not the other way around.

Then again, I might be wrong too - I just don't want people to think that this stuff is absolute science, b/c it's not, it can really go either way.

In the end, both you and Otter have given really good advice: do you and do it well, and when the time comes that someone else is at that some point, you two can do the couple thing too. That's the important part, not the labels.

I Recently Found Love Online
 

It can happen, and it happened to me. Not only is she pretty, but as a person, she's just so real.





Here are a few pictures of her:

http://tinypic.com/wjomc
http://tinypic.com/wjon9

HAHA! I CHERISH my internet love.

Re: I Recently Found Love Online
 

Isnt that Mullet? :confused:

Re: I Recently Found Love Online
 

I am LOVING this.

Re: Re: I Recently Found Love Online
 

Didn't you meet Bobbythedon on adultfriendfinder.com? Or was it Asianavenue.com?

-Rudey

Re: Re: Re: I Recently Found Love Online
 

nice to have you back! how was it in Tom Earps closet? Did he feed you atleast?