I have to tell my boyfriend all of the time to don't keep stuff to himself. I think that is a widespread problem for Black men. He needs to remain healthy not just for himself but for his 2 daughters.

Re: Re: Re: Re: well, well, well
 

I will definitely pray for him.

Re: Re: Re: Re: well, well, well
 

Dang, $1,100 a month....is this baby named Rockafeller?

Really, with all the weight this guy has on him, I'd expect him to have the issues you described with guy numma 2.

It's good that you could listen to him uncritically. Because most men, I think, are more analytical than verbal, we tend to keep our own counsel and don't let much of our emotional turmoil out for others to see. (of course yall see the dysfunctional result of this but that's another thread.)

I think the fact that dude shared all that with you suggests he does like you. Otherwise, he'd have continued to carry it inside, leaving you to make your judgements based on his external behavior.

I agree with CT4, P-R-A-Y-E-R is most definitely in order.

...but of course D998, all GC eyes await your next move.

Announcer voice says from off-screen:

Will D998 hold ole boy's hand and say "baby, it's gon be alright. we gon do dis here" orrrr (in my best Tom Joyner voice) will she say "can you run me 'round the corner to my momma nem' house and I'll get wit you later?"

Stay tuned for the next GC installment of "D998 Handles Biz." :p

Don't do it!
 

I've been down this road before, and if you don't take heed to the "flags" that God has allowed you to see -You will have nothing but heartache.

Are you prepared to deal with a woman who may still have feelings for him?

Women(and Men) are territorial, and you'd be amazed at how they will act once they feel like they've 'lost' that person. As long as this man is by himself and not dating anyone, it's all good. But if they see you two together. DRAMA!!!

This man still has feelings for his Ex-wife, no matter what he may tell you. His actions are speaking louder; he came to church with the woman!!! When you are truly over someone, you don't do stuff like that.

He also has an inflated ego: Men have to feel like they're needed; and by him having problems with his ex-wife making more money than him, that contributed to their demise.

Delph998, if you hook up with this man, you will be unequally yoked, and have nothing but problems. Be patient... and pray that God will bless you with someone who is more on your level.

Re: Don't do it!
 

Wow! It's amazing to hear someone say the total opposite of what everybody else has said. Firstly, he came to church with the girl BEFORE they married each other. So it wasn't like they came to church after marriage. When they divorced, she moved to a different state. MORE INFORMATION: Well, I found out some interesting information this weekend that will respond to what you said about him still having feelings for the wife that he came to church with. He told me this weekend that he was soooo unsure about marrying this girl that he called the church to meet with the Pastor. Ummm, I don't know, but that says a lot to me.

I have concluded that I will give him an opportunity to win my heart. I talked to my parents about it (we're very close-knit) and my daddy pretty much said that people make mistakes. We'll see what happens. To be continued...

Tony, you crack me up!

Re: Re: Don't do it!
 

What, all ole boy had was cold feet? I thought you were going to say you found out that he had a crack problem or that he'd just found out that bin Laden was his second cousin on his momma's daddy's side or or something like that.

...after all we gotta keep the soap "How D998 Handles Biz" hype. It's all about the ratings, kid!! :)

(Seriously, as has been said, I suggest you do your own praying on it and go with what the Lord tells you.)

Re: Re: Re: Don't do it!
 

TRUE, you're totally right. I'll keep you posted!

Re: Re: Re: Don't do it!
 

I agree 4hunnit pacent;) , but keep both eyes open, and if you wear glasses keep all four open!!!!:p

Re: Re: Re: Don't do it!
 

Tony, you are straight crazy!!! :D :D :D

Delph, seriously, keep us posted. With all of his problems, I'm glad that he has you to consult with. Remain his friend first and foremost - if you start developing deeper feelings for him, they hey, go for it (with both eyes open of course). Do keep us posted. :)

Delph, you've been given some good advice. But honestly, another thing also concerns me about this situation, and that's you. You sound a lot like me - a real soft touch. I don't know you from Adam's housecat, but I would hate for you to really start feeling this guy and he take advantage of your emotions. Just be careful. I'm sure he needs a friend, and you sound like the type that I can call on at 4:00 in the morning and you'd say "come on over - oh no, it's no problem, I was getting up for the day anyway!" and there'd we be talking about problems.

I can also see where Lizanabavi is coming from with her concern. This friend of yours does have a mountain of issues, but if you're willing to deal with it, then so be it - JUST BE CAREFUL!

Well said, btb87. I think most of us felt that sentiment although it never made it to our posts.

besides, if ole boy starts actin' s a fool, can you say GC ROADTRIP? (hey, I ain't swung any wood in a while --never mind, nationals. that was a jokey-joke!)

can you even do a drive-by up in the great lakes region?

CTFU!

If y'all were swinging round by the East Coast I would be down.

I wish more folks lived closer:(

Okay Tony! You said it...if I start having some issues, I'm gonna call ya! You're not too far away from me too! I'm gonna hold you to your word.

BTB87, your assessment is very correct! I am very compassionate. All of my friends know that I am there for them whenever they need me. So that's the reason why I'm going to take things slowly because I'm not trying to get hurt. I'm also praying over this situation BIG TIME! We'll see what happens.

Lovelyivy, you seem soooo cool! I wish you were closer so we could hook up girly! :D ;)

Don't go down that road!!!
 

Originally posted by delph998

Well, I found out some interesting information this weekend that will respond to what you said about him still having feelings for the wife that he came to church with. He told me this weekend that he was soooo unsure about marrying this girl that he called the church to meet with the Pastor. Ummm, I don't know, but that says a lot to me.




Flag!!! Delph998, this man has fed you nothing but a bunch of bunk!!!:rolleyes:

He married that woman because he wanted too, don't fall for that. I'm not suggesting that you can't handle this man; but why put yourself through uneccesary heartache when you don't have too? What he did to those two women, he will do to you.

A man will do what you allow him to do, and if he knows he can play with your emotions -he will. At this point, he's trying to fill you out, to see where his boundaries are. Leave that man where he's at... the altar for prayer.

*When in doubt... don't!*

Re: Don't go down that road!!!
 

You say this with such conviction!! So you don't believe that he's made two big mistakes, and he's made a change in his life? That's what I get from you. I understand that there are two sides to every story--he has a jacked up past. He's never made it seem like his two wives were the blame every time. He's admitted his faults as well. However, like I said in the first post, he's changed. When Christ enters your life, it can change completely!! That's why I've considered giving him an opportunity.

I've decided to give him a shot simply because I've lived a guarded life for so long. I'm not gonna marry this dude tomorrow...I'm just giving him an opportunity to prove himself and then I'll see if "WE" can be.

OH BY THE WAY: we're going out tonight, guys!!