I have to admit... I cried the night before bid day when we got a call telling us we had 10 ladies and the others had gotten 18-20... I got over it by the next day when those 10 ladies came running out to join us... and we eventually COBed to 15... but it can hard for the chapter that doesn't do well either... to welcome their new women when they're disapointed there's not more of them... and all that time and effort and energy has gone into rush..

At Hillsdale, our dean and our Panhel are VERY big on encouraging (even requiring) girls to put down two houses on their card (two being the maximum number). I "suicided" and was very happy with what I got. OUr hosue has always encouraged girls who are unsure just not to sign at all, and thus we have more non-signers than upset girls. This usually works out: the don't sign that day, have a week to think about it and get to know some girls outside of recruitment, and then might receive their new bids. This works out for many people and there are less "spur of the moment" emotional decisions.

Glitter650, we had a similar situation this year. We only picked up nine girls on pick-up night (quota was 13, I believe, and we have made quota every year for forever). Many of the members were upset because girls that they had wanted had not signed or signed elsewhere. I felt extremely bad for our new members on bid night because some of our actives were acting kind of dissapointed. However, the wonderful thing is that we picked up nine beautiful girls who really, really wanted to be Pi Phis, regardless of where they were on our list. Additionally, we ended up picking up several non-signers the next week! :)

I remember one year walking by a pnm bawling her eyes out to 2 sisters. This was after bids had been given out. Turns out another sorority had told her that she was supposed to get a bid from their group. She came late to the bid night party but never pledged. The Greek Life Dir wanted to talk with her about possible rush infraction but the girl dropped out of sight. I don't know if she went through rush the next year.

You also have sisters who are devastated that their Rush Crush put someone else 1st on the bid list and got a bid from them.

Unfortunately, there is crying and lying on both sides.

that happened to me-- this one awesome girl came to COBs before recruitment, but we couldnt give her a bid because she was a freshman (we are allowed to bid upperclassmen before formal recruitment, and in fact we usually pick up 5 girls before the process begins!) and she loooved us, or so she said. I preffed her, but she went to XYZ. the entire chapter was heartbroken. But its ok, because we got an awesome pledge class that semester without her.

Jocelyn, also at some large schools where the bid matching is done by computer the program "throws out" girls who suicide or don't put the max number of choices. So in this case you are sorta stuck.

Ah, I see. It isn't fair for PNM's to be "punished" for knowing exactly who they fit best with. It's like "you aren't willing to settle for second or third so we'll just match you last" :(

PNM's going through formal recruitment are always encouraged to maximize their possibilities by going to all the parties they are eligible for as well as filling out their pref card completely - although certainly not every campus Panhellenic kicks out the cards of those who choose to SIP. I have seen many posts on GC (and I know women personally) who did not get their first choice in formal recruitment but gave their second choice a try and it worked out beautifully. Of course, there are women for whom it doesn't work out. I don't think this is a "punishment" for "knowing" what group you want. It is an opportunity for a PNM to see that it is likely that they would fit well with another group if given the opportunity. That opportunity is lost if a rushee SIPs and doesn't match. This is especially important for freshman women who may have a preconceived notion about joining only one group (maybe the one who's website they liked best or the one their third cousin joined in another state) when they would fit just as well (or better) in another.
No PNM ever has to accept a bid she doesn't want, but filling the bid card out completely gives PNMs a chance to go to another house if they don't get their first choice. When it comes to going bidless many will do that.

Originally posted by 2blue-Unfortunately, there is crying and lying on both sides. Very true.

This is especially important for freshman women who may have a preconceived notion about joining only one group (maybe the one who's website they liked best or the one their third cousin joined in another state) when they would fit just as well (or better) in another. aopinthesky Great answer!
This is the part I think needs repeating over and over as new women ponder recruitment. What you see isn't always what you get.

I would bet some percent-perhaps larger than we think-of the unhappiest women may very well have gotten their first choice.
Oh, but that may be too cynical...

Oh, justamom, I don't think it's possible to be too cynical about almost anything in this world. :)

Quoting Tom Hanks from the movie "A LEague Of Our Own"


Crying? Are you Crying?

There is no crying in Sorority Rush! There is NO CRYING in Sorority Rush. :p

Didn't read the whole thread, but wanted to mention this is especially sticky @ my school because after PanHel hands out the bids (in this big student center, to all 400 freshmen girls who rush) all of the new members are led by their Rho Chis in a big group to the gym. Then each sorority's (we have 9) sophomore class comes in and one by one each group claps and does their rush chant (there's probably an official word for it--we do "Pi Pi ADPi") and leads out their group of girls (roughly 35-40 each year). So the girls who hypothetically wanted one specific sorority, for example, but didn't get it gets the lovely chance to sit there and watch as all of the girls IN that new bid class get up and leave with their group.....I remember seeing more than one crying girl in the big group of 400 freshmen girls as we chanted and left with our new alphas!

All I have to say is ditto.:(

LMAO! :D Every time I see this thread title, I think of that line and that movie!

How about crying tears of joy???????


I must have looked like a total fool opening up my bid card to
see Zeta Tau Alpha and then jumping up and down and sobbing hysterically from joy and relief at the same time :)

Great minds and all that . . . ;)