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I used to always think - NO WAY IN H*** would I marry anyone in the military. I grew up in a military family (Dad's retired Navy) and understand the lack of communication, constant deployments, and the divorce rate (and this was during "peacetime").
Now, I can't say I'd rule it out. You can't help who you fall in love with (maybe I'm looking at it with rose-tinted glasses?), and their occupation is part of who they are. That being said, I'm not going to go out and hunt down a military man to date and maybe marry, but if that's who I wind up settling down with, then I'd be fine with it. :) |
i think i could... i mean if you were really truly honestly in love with these people, why would you throw it away??
i grew up in a militarial background - my uncle was in the marines - and he'd always talk about it - and a good friend of mine at work is active in the Nat'l Guard, and got deployed this summer, so i pretty much have the utmost respect for anyone in uniform..... not to mention they're particularly nice looking :D so, YES! i could !! |
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It seems like a lot of young men enter the military right before or after marrying their high school sweethearts--and for a lot of 18 year olds, I'm sure it's the ability to provide a comfortable living for a family without having a college education or vocational training that attracts them to the military. Most of them are divorced before they can drink legally. |
Yeah, that's part of it.
Especially when the time for deployment comes. Everyone rushes to get married and have kids to leave something behind. Plus, it's very, very difficult to have a comfortable living on an enlisted person's pay, unless both of them are working. |
need advice
i recently started dating a guy in the army.. a medic at fort drum near watertown, new york. He's being sent to iraq the end of january. we met the beginning of december... i want to be with him- but the thought of him leaving is tearing us apart b/c he doesn't want to hurt me.
i don't know what to do.... i miss him so much already and he's just in illinois visiting family... suggestions...? :( |
Re: need advice
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I don't care how you all slice it, in times of war, all military personnel serving on the war front do come back with some issue that is difficult to resolve and see through completely... Can you deal with post traumatic stress disorder? I'm not trying to scare folks, but I am a realist when it comes to war. And most folks in the US never see what's really going down in times of war... |
I remember a certain (name of sorority witheld) that stole my heart for a semester or two, who was in ROTC. She looked damn fine in her uniform.
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Re: Re: need advice
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i know what you are saying- and sigh... you are definately right. my best friend just came back from afghanistan/iraq (i forgot to mention this) and he's had serious pts, nightmares, and alcohol problems...(and you are def right to say that not as many people know about the horrors of this war) i've stood by his side- but he's my best friend.... not my boyfriend... i guess i'll just take it day by day- move on and see how things go when he gets back... :( thanks for the advice though- its a tough situation- i appreciate it |
I've dated a guy from each service branch....so apparently I have to problems w/men in uniform, ;)
I guess if I had met a serviceman before meeting my current bf and wanted to marry him, I wouldn't have a problem with it. However, right now I'll my guyfriends are deployed so I'm just taking care of their girlfriends here, so I get enough of the deployment grief. |
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When Mr. KR's reserve unit was called up and he had to go to Dubai two years ago, he was an O-4 and I would not have been able to manage if the company he was with at the time hadn't paid us the difference between his Navy and civilian pay. Well, I could have but it would have meant major cutting back. I've always felt that the military pays enough to exist on, but not to really live on (if that makes any sense?) |
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Way to stereotype. It's kind of hard for girls who are in this situation and have chosen it for our careers... not many men are willing to follow us around the world at the expense to their own careers. Unless you get lucky and snatch up a good one who really, really loves you :D |
it depends.
it's not the danger factor, it's the you're at someone else's beck and call besides ME factor combined with the i've never been good at long distance relationships so i avoid them at all costs factor. i wouldn't seriously date a guy in the military, but if a guy i was seriously dating decided to join, i'd stick it out to see if it could work. |
No.
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That would be a really hard thing to do, especially if they move around alot.
I can't imagine what that must be like, especially if they are overseas. My hat is off! |
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So now three years later, would I marry someone in the military? ABSOLUTELY NOT. If I fall in love with someone, he's getting out before we say 'I do.' |
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