Yeah, but I would love to get to know you, you fine, hot, young, tender thang you. Come on and I bet ya, big poppa will show you how to have a good time. (He offers me his arm)
I'm thinking, like oh no Pedro did not set me up with Grandpa here. So I said to myself, hey, I have been through hell and back today. I done got myself all dolled up to go out tonight and to have a good time, and besides we are at the Ritz, and besides I am getting up to $800 for this old stiff, and besides he got manners. I'll just go in and have a couple of drinks and my dinner I am hungry, and bounce up out of here. So I smile and take his arm and go inside of the Ritz. When I walked in, I.......

...didn't see no kinda fundraising activities going on. It was just every day hotel life, from the looks of it. "What is going on?" I asked him. "I thought this was supposed to be some kind of fundraiser." He laughed and said, "Sugar, it is! You sleep with me in my penthouse suite tonight, you raise yourself some funds! Now let me go get the key from the desk, you wait right here."

As he went to go get the key...

Pierre.... Tall, dark, handsome, and rich.....my favorite combinations. I tried to play it off like I didn't see him because I didn't want him to know I was with the ol' stiff on a date. So I quickly turned and went the other way. The old man starting yelling, hey you, come back here. I paid for you and you gone give me what I paid for. I picked up my running speed and ran out of the door. To myself: I am going to ring Pedro's neck when I see him. DAg, I ran my new pair of stockings too and broke my heel on my $300 shoes. SO I decided to wait outside down the street from the Ritz waiting for a taxi, then this long sleek Beamer pulls up in front of me and asks if I needed a lift. Oh, my God it was Pierre. SO I told him........

..."Yeah, I need a lift back to my place. " As I sink into the comforts of this fine German car, I think d&*n, I could use a drink! He was saying..."Would you like to stop for a cup of coffee?" I smile for the first time today. Just as I start to accept his offer, I hear....

Another man's voice...But it didn't sound like any ole' man's man's voice, if you know what I mean. I looked next to me, and there was in fact a man laying in the back seat. I must have awakened him when I got into the car...

Anyway, he says to Pierre "Honey, who are you taking to?" Then he sits up and says to Pierre "Sugardumpling, aren't you going to introduce me to your friend?" And I'm like WTH? :eek: :confused: :mad: I said "Honey"?! Why is he calling you 'Honey' Pierre, like he's your man or something?!" And Pierre says "I have something to tell you. Giovonni here IS my lover"...

I was speechless and in shock for a few seconds as "Giovanni is my lover repeated in my mind". I turned to Pierre and said ......

....so you picked me up for an menage 'a trois huh!!!:mad: :mad:. His friend jumps in cutting me off my sentence and says "Honey what kind of perfume of you wearing. I:rolleyes: didn't even respond to him I said "Pierre stop the car and let me out". He goes..........

"Sorry that you weren't down. We had the cameras and everything set up."

"Yeah, whatever," I said as I got out of the car. Since my car was parked back at the Ritz and I didn't want to risk running into that old dude again, I just hailed a cab.

The cab pulled up to the curb and I hopped in. The cabbie asked,"Where are you headed, pretty lady."

When he said that, I realized that I was all dolled up and looking too good to just go home. So I said, "Take me to the Bourbon Room. You know, that new club downtown."

When the cab driver let me out and I paid him, I proceeded to the door. My friend from college is part owner of the club, so I knew that I wouldn't have to wait in line. As I was approaching the door, I saw that everyone started yelling and pointing back towards the street. I turned around to see what the commotion was about. That's when I saw......

2 police squad cars arresting Pierre and his "honey-love" friend. Only his friend was cussing and trying to fight the officers saying "you can't arrest me I got a trunk full of fake fendis, prada, and louis vuitton purses that I got to sell for pimp Bishop Juan......let me go you f!8c?&$$g po-pos. That's when I just proceeded on into the club and......................................:D

...Ya'll would never guess who I saw inside the club: Shay and my man! Ooops, I mean my ex-man!!!!! :eek: :mad: I could not believe that she lied to me! My own flesh and blood! This day was turning out to be like an episode of Jenny Jones!!! Anyway, I went up to them and...

said "HI", and walked away. I wanted both of them to see that I was out on the town and looking lovely. My ex- man's jaw dropped d*&n near to the floor as he eyed my black Versace outfit that was hugging all of my curves just right. I make my way to the bar and order a sour apple martini. I'm chillin' at the bar swaying my hips to the music when here comes.......

The End!
 

my knight in shining armor. He puts his hands around my waist and asks if I am ready to go home. Without missing a beat, I say, "yes."