Supporting your daughter's chapter is one thing.. Threatening to cut all ties with your own sorority is another. Regardless of their level of involvement, they just sound petty and childish.

This reminded me of one of my favorite teachers in junior high: she had assigned seating in the class according to your grade standing in the class, and it changed every week. I would bet that many a parent wouldn't stand for this now.

On a related note, I read a really nice blog post recently about how important it is to let children experience disappointment:
http://www.musingmomma.com/2012/01/s...ppuccinos.html

I don't understand alumni who trash their house and threaten to withdraw support. If you now think your chapter is so mean, horrible, nasty, petty, slutty, druggies etc... etc...

Why would you want your legacy to join that kind of house.

COB and informal recruitment are rare at UGA, since most, if not all, chapters make quota (or quota-plus) on a regular basis. I know that some chapters had to COB the last time total was raised to hit the new total, but it is not common. A chapter might also choose to do informal to fill a spot for a senior who graduates in December (but, again, that is rare). Make sure to tell your niece to make sure that she is on whatever COB list Greek Life has, just in case.

Couple the everyone gets a trophy mentality with your first evidence of non-tropjy ness (in your eyes) going on immediate blast all over social media, and yeah, it is the perfect storm.

On another note, I'd like to see a new pledge write an article called "Dear Mom, I Got Dropped From Your Sorority And I Really Don't Care."

The tent talk at my Georgia high school (I did not go to UGA) was that unless you had someone powerful on the inside, either a current member or alum, it all came down to looks and if you were eye candy you would have no problem and if not you would have a very rough time.

I realize that you are most likely just repeating what you heard, but tons of girls who are NOT "eye candy" pledge wonderful sororities and are delighted with their recruitment experience. Not every girl wants to spend four years with eye candy or values perceived beauty above other characteristics.

The other aspect of UGA recruitment that I think makes it particularly difficult is the actual schedule. The girls start their day at 6 am dressed and ready to go. They get good or bad news regarding their party invites and head right on out to start their day bright and early. The only round that is spread over two days is first round and every day is an early start and a long, hot day. Bid day (night, really) is the first day of classes.

I had a rec girl at Alabama and their schedule of later starts (more sleep) and two days per round followed by a few days between bid day and classes seems more conducive to relaxed girls who might make different decisions regarding dropping out or staying in.

Reading the comments in the linked thread from another site, it appears to me that the parents, grandparents, bio.sisters, and aunts are as self-centered, privileged, and with as high expectations as the generation we are talking about. These are the parents who tried to "fix" everything when it didn't go just right for their kiddies, and this situation, sorority recruitment, is beyond their reach. They can't bully a teacher or administrator or a coach into changing the outcome and they are frustrated. And it is obvious to me that these "active" alumnae who "support" their chapters pay their alumnae dues and/or make a contribution to a scholarship fund and that is all the "support" they give, because if they actually supported their sorority with their physical presence, they would understand the current process.

On a related note, I read a really nice blog post recently about how important it is to let children experience disappointment:
http://www.musingmomma.com/2012/01/s...ppuccinos.html[/QUOTE]

I had a parent state that seating the top 10 students in the class on the front row at graduation was discrimination. How is it discrimination if everyone in the class had the opportunity to be on the front row if they just would have worked a little harder, studied a little more or taken a few honors classes?

Agreed - the sorority is more than just one house of that sorority. The parents sound just as petulant and entitled as the kids - probably the first time the parents haven't been able to fix a bad situation for their kids and they're going nuts.

ETA - I see that I said just what FSUZeta said, except she said it better!

Release figure management doesn't really allow for that kind of thing, for the most part.

I see so many examples of women withdrawing from the process because they didn't feel 100% comfortable with the sororities that they had remaining. Honestly...how many of us felt completely confident and sure about our choices? How many felt this ironclad connection after a few short days during FFR? I sure didn't.

Years ago when I went through, I knew that I wanted to be Greek more than I wanted to be an XYZ, so I went through the process with an open mind and didn't just focus on a few "top tier" groups. PNM's who are doing this are setting themselves up for disappointment. When I opened my card on Bid Day and received a bid from my second choice group, I was upset, but got over it and had the best college experience, and have been extremely engaged (both with time and finances) as an alumna. Life is not always fair...women today need to learn to deal with life's disappointments and make the most of the situation.

Recruitment today can be brutal and there are no guarantees. This generation of women is not used to being told no. At these super-competitive schools, women should be thrilled to receive a bid from ANY group. This popularity-contest mentality is such a shame. SO many are missing out on an incredible life-long experience because of this thinking.

That is what my niece did, she didn't feel comfortable in the houses where she went to pref, and then dropped. I tried to tell her that she would be be happy in any of the houses. That with 200 plus members, you find your group within the big group. But she liked 2 or 3 houses that dropped her after round 2 and she was so disappointed at that I don't think it mattered after that.
Of course I think she made a mistake; but it is her life.
Hopefully she will go thru again next year. .. I hope that she will!

It is so hard dovelovesk, to get thru to young people sometimes. Hopefully your niece will get involved with a couple of different groups on campus, do well in her classes and make some contacts within the sororities. That way, should she decide to rush again, she has set herself up as best she can (plus getting new recs. for all the chapters).